***
As they left the office, they both walked to the lobby and looked at each other for a second.
"Will there be anything we can do now? I thought the talk would last longer, but it was pretty brief."
Toru let go of Gray's hand and folded his arms. His gaze was as calm as ever, which gave Gray a lot of reassurance. That expressionlessness of Toru's engendered confidence in Gray.
As for her, she nodded at Toru's words. "I also thought it would be something more complicated. The professor was always a sensible person..."
"Yes. I also think the same thing. Now, it's still early, don't you have classes today? Because it looks like you do."
"That's right. If it's alright with you, maybe you can join me."
Toru blinked twice. He nodded his head saying. "Sure, my sweet girlfriend."
Gray's face became like ripe tomato after Toru's shameless words. "You like to tease me a lot lately, don't you think?"
She had already taken those words of Toru's as a tease. Sometimes Toru is a jerk without realizing it, but there were times when he was a jerk on purpose. For her, figuring out when Toru was going to intersperse between being an idiot unintentionally and acting like an idiot was difficult.
Toru's expression softened a little. "It's just that it's fun to see how you react."
"You're a sadist..."
It was clearly the behavior of a sadist. Although, to be fair, there was a time when Toru was a psychotic sadist. A little bit of that had stuck with the Toru of the present day.
"I don't know. Maybe I am."
"You have no shame", it sounded a little trite, but Gray had to reiterate that bit of information. Nevertheless, she took Toru by the hand. She squeezed his hand a little tightly and looked at him seriously. Though the seriousness was lost due to her face being red from earlier. "But that's how you're fine, my sweet boyfriend."
This had become awkward for both of us. Even for you... But that's how young people's relationships are. One day you're young like them, and the next you're a single guy watching couples flirting on the street and thinking about punching them out of embarrassment and misery you feel.
With that last one, somehow their relationship had been confirmed. Two teenagers who love each other, going through the streets of London gazing into each other's eyes while others simply try to ignore them.
"I think I did go overboard with what I said earlier. I'm sorry", Toru said, turning to leave the house.
Gray followed him and they silently made their way to the Modern Magecraft Department. Of course, the two forgot one very important thing. They didn't clean up the place where they blatantly had sex. Now the poor maid who was about to arrive would have to do the dirty work. Poor woman...
***
Time passed as it normally does. Toru continued to walk Gray to school, they walked home together as they walked hand in hand, looked into each other's eyes as they drowned in their cloying love. There's really nothing different to tell. They're both still kids at the end of it all, putting aside all the things they do at night.
Right now, though, there is something else to tell. Toru always tends to wander the streets of London when he's feeling sadder than usual. As someone who thinks about things too much, thinking while taking a walk around is pretty good. However, tonight is special because Gray is with him.
It's been a few days since the two of them became a couple. It's not much, but for both of them, those times were extremely long and different. It even seems like when you're in love time flows differently. Very strange all around.
"Then there's Okamitsuki. She's a giant wolf, the size of an old tree", Toru explained. He was looking down on the city from the roof of one of the taller buildings.
Sitting next to him, Gray watched the lights of the city as something bright and beautiful. The only bad thing is that all this light pollution doesn't allow for good visibility of the stars in the sky.
"A giant shewolf...", it sounded like a story out of a fairy tale. Gray was very curious about this little story Toru was telling.
When they went up to this place, neither of them had anything to talk about. However, seeing the moon high in the sky, Toru remembered a certain character that was important in his life. How she was an almost mythical being, Toru thought it would make an interesting story for Gray.
"When I was a kid there was a certain event that would allow me to advance in rank as a ninja. The final test was about one-on-one fights. We were given some time to train and I decided it was time to learn new things. So I asked Yamato-sensei if he could teach me how to summon powerful beasts."
"How does that work, is it similar to summoning a servant?"
"Hm... now that I remember", without looking away from the sky, Toru whispered. "Yes. It's similar."
From there, Toru told her about when he first attempted to perform the jutsu, which transported him directly to the Ōkami clan village. He recounted the fight against the head of the Okamitsuki clan and how he managed to earn the right to summon the wolves of the Ōkami clan. Toru told this to her with much inexpressiveness, but Gray could imagine a little Toru fighting a giant wolf.
It was a story worth telling. Gray was grateful to know more about the man she loves.
"Okamitsuki was very strict, don't you think?", she said.
Toru sketched a soft calm smile in response. "Yes... She is very strict. A she-wolf capable of breaking your legs as long as you learn to fight like an animal."
That wasn't a metaphor, it was literally an anecdote. Gray twisted the expression on her face when she heard that. This story had fantasy overtones, but she knew something like this could be possible. After having lived magical adventures with the professor, Gray understood that this world is much, much bigger than it seems.
After that story, Toru sat down next to Gray and she rested her head on his shoulder. Toru looked at her, quizzical, but ignored her looking at the scenery once more.
"It's getting late. We should get down from here and go home", Toru said. He rested his head on Gray's, as he felt it was quite a comfortable thing to do.
"Let's stay like this for a while longer."
"Okay."
...
...
Although a few minutes passed, neither of them minded the passing of time. It wasn't boring, much less uncomfortable. The silence, the cold wind and the bright scenery were perfect to form the romantic mood.
Gray closed her eyes and felt Toru's soft breathing. If there was anything she could wish for right now it would be to live every day like she did right now. She had never felt so calm in a long time. If only this lasted forever, Gray was sure she would die happy.
Up there the stars twinkle and twinkle, emanating their light for millions and millions of light years. Many of those stars have already died, but they continue to give hope to mankind with their light.
Opening her eyes, Gray gazed up at the cloudy sky, imagining the stars she once saw from her hometown. If such a landscape were possible next to Toru, she could smile like the child she once was.
Toru probably noticed how nostalgic Gray's expression was getting, as he looked up at the sky. He also imagined the stars and tried to say something.
"The man often dreams of reaching for the stars...""
Gray looked up at him. Silently, she paid attention to the wisdom of a broken man.
In Toru's memories, the adult Alek Goosev watched the night sky full of stars. That man stretched out his hand, trying to reach the dark firmament, but it was impossible for him, he was too small in this immense universe. But even a small man could reach for the stars. Nothing was impossible, that's what dreams are all about...
"A long time ago now, I used to see the stars as people's dreams. Maybe, out there in the world, there is a child who wishes for a happy family. Maybe there is a man who wants the best for humanity or a teenager who wants to end his life. Wishes, dreams, however bad or good they may be, are like a vast sea of stars. We only need to be able to reach them. Someday someone will be able to reach them. And that may be a good thing, but it may also be a very bad thing."
A star ended Alek's life, but it also began Toru's life.
Gray understood a little of what this boy said. She had read and pondered too much not to understand. Besides, for Toru to say something as fanciful as reaching for the stars in the form of dreams, Gray felt Toru was finally opening his heart.
"So, were you ever able to reach for the stars?"
Gray's question left Toru silent. He thought about it for a second, as all the painful memories passed in succession. Then, he answered in a soft tone of voice.
"Not yet... I don't even know which star I should reach for."
Because never in his life did he know what his heart truly desired. But that was not a bad thing.
"In that case, I'll help you reach for your star", she said, taking him by the hand. She looked into his eyes earnestly.
It might be that the way they both approached the subject was rather childish, but they couldn't be faulted for that fact either. They were both still very young. Gray, who grew up with the ideals of her village and Toru, who even now is still the same boy who tried to take his own life all those years ago. His heart and soul are broken, but someone else's love could heal those wounds.
"Leave it to me. I promise you that together we can."
Toru sighed with a soft smile. "You're good at choosing words. You're talented."
"Hm? What's that for?"
Standing up, taking a step into the void and stepping into the solidified air, Toru looked at Gray as the cold wind ruffled his cloak.
"It's because you're an amazing person."
-By Gray-
Maybe it was my imagination. Yeah... maybe it was that. At that moment, Toru looked strangely cool floating in the air among all the neon lights in the city.
When he told me that I'm amazing, I immediately smiled like a fool. I didn't know how to respond to such praise so I kept quiet as I looked at him.
Toru took a gentle leap in the air and immediately jumped again into nothingness. Before he fell, he held out his hand for me to take. He looked at me with those silver eyes and his soft smile that looked fake, waiting for me... Waiting for Gray....
I jumped up without reproach. I took him by the hand and he hugged me in response.
"This is where the night ends", he said, but I know that's a lie. Nights don't end this way. Not when it's Toru.
We descended again through the streets of London without anyone seeing us land. There were a lot of people still walking down the street, but Toru didn't make a big deal out of it. He was still holding my hand as if it had become habit. He walked elegantly among the people, who were puzzled by the butler's clothes he was wearing.
This is what it feels like...
'A love story...'
When I think of it that way, I'm ashamed to admit it, but so what? I'm happy the way I am.
***
But maybe it is an erotic love story, because when they least expected it, Toru and Gray ended up in front of a strange hotel.
"This was a shortcut, wasn't it?", she asked.
Toru nodded in response. "I often pass by here in the evenings. There are a lot of couples coming in and out all the time. Let's continue."
"Wait."
Gray stopped Toru by squeezing his hand. He looked at her raising his eyebrows. The truth was that Gray thought of something when she saw the hotel sign. As a country girl, inexperienced in all sorts of things and also secluded from modern society, she deep down wanted to experience that staying overnight in a hotel. Couples who have money usually do that from time to time.
They both have money, but...
"Do you want to come in? I mean, a hotel serves the same function as a house. If we spend money on something we might as well get for free when we go home, I think that would be a waste."
"Uh... You're right about that, but...", Gray's face turned red. She ducked her gaze so her face couldn't be seen. "At home we can't do 'that' so freely..."
"Oh... You're right about that..."
When the words they both use become the same, it becomes the undeniable demonstration that, at times, these two teenagers seem to share the same neuron.
"Should we go in?"
"You think?", Toru tapped his chin with his knuckle. "We look too young. Maybe they won't let us in."
Gray, a little bolder than usual, whispered, "We lose nothing by trying", looking up, her eyes glittered dangerously.
"You've got a point. Let's go."
They walked into the hotel. The receptionist looked at them both with analytical eyes.
"We want a room", Toru said. His nonchalant tone gave Gray a little more reassurance.
The receptionist replied, "Aren't they too young, what are they doing out so late walking around?"
Toru sighed. He pulled some bills out of his coat and approached the receptionist. "What we do you don't care. You take the money and shut your mouth."
Even though Toru was a bit aggressive with his words, the receptionist took the money and stuffed it between her breasts. Then she took a key and slid it across the counter gingerly.
"Room 42. You can pay when you vacate the place."
At the receptionist's words and after a blatant bribe, Toru nodded and moved forward next to Gray. She looked at the receptionist for a second and then turned to look at Toru.
"That was quick."
"Yeah. Money will convince almost anyone, so there's nothing to worry about. Besides, she sure thinks we're a couple who ran away from home."
"I see. You're good with words."
Toru nodded. "I told you the same thing before."
Gray smiled. "I know. I know..."
***
The room wasn't as big as it looked, but it wasn't small either. The walls were red with white detailing on the columns. There was a large bed in the center of the front wall covered by white sheets and two nightstands on the sides. The room had dim lighting that was pleasing to the eye and there was a large bathroom with a shower included. The place had everything you needed to spend the night.
"I've never been in a place like this before. I feel like I'm doing something wrong." As someone who lived under a strict upbringing, spending the night in a hotel with a man was something she considered wrong. "My mother would be very angry if she found out about this...". She whispered, as if she was listening to the woman talking in the distance.
Toru paid special attention to the mention of that person.
"You never mentioned your family."
Gray smiled wistfully looking at the white sheets on the bed. "I only have my mother, but she... She's a complicated woman."
"I understand what you mean. You don't need to break your mind remembering things you don't want to." Hypocrisy, that's how Toru felt saying that to Gray.
"Thank you. Now that I'm with you, I don't need to think about the things that bother me. I just want to keep feeling normal."
Toru sat up in bed and looked at the ceiling. He settled on the bed supporting his back and reached out his hand to see his fingers.
"So, should we go to sleep, it's late already?"
Gray shook her head. Besides being able to rest, she was thinking of doing something else. She'd mentioned it before, but Toru was playing dumb pretending he didn't remember.
"I'm still not sleepy. We can do something else."
They both looked at each other for a brief second.
"I understand. In that case, what do you want?"
There was the sound of a digital clock striking midnight. Gray's breath mingled with her thoughts. She didn't just want to do 'it' with Toru, there was something else she needed.
Before answering Toru, Gray kept a brief silence. "I want you to love me."
Toru felt a shiver, but calmed down after he closed his eyes and stilled the voices that suddenly screamed in his mind.
"... I see. I may still not understand a lot of things, but... I will", he said, holding out his hand for Gray to take.
She smiled. That answer was something she had expected. Well, even though she really expected Toru to say 'I love you', the answer she got left her satisfied. So she took him by the hand and hugged him.
***
A couple of hours passed. Toru was staring at the ceiling while Gray lay next to him, sweaty and breathing hard. His poker face aside, Toru's mind was blank.
Looking at Gray, Toru thought about giving her a break. She is strong and has great endurance, but she was still different from a spirit. And, considering Toru is not a normal heroic spirit, that would be more dangerous.
Sakura had seen it before. Toru had always been the plaything of the Mothers of the Worlds. First in his life as Alek, where he was the protagonist of the story created by the World, then in the Shinobi World, where he was forced to live a hell full of loss because of the World and the consequences of Zelretch's visit. And now he is in this World, where he was not allowed to rest as a spirit and was turned into a puppet that relives his past over and over again.
The hatred the Worlds have for Toru is partially justified, after all, Toru is no ordinary person and his very presence endangers the World itself.
"What's in here?" Toru opened one of the nightstand drawers and pulled out a strange small object. When he saw what it was, his eyes rolled.
"What did you find?" Waking up after a brief rest, Gray didn't know what had left Toru looking so blank, but seeing what the boy was holding in his hand, she felt as if the world opened up to tell her that she's stupid.
What Toru had in his hand was a condom. The presence of this object made them both understand something.
"I think..."
"Yes..."
They were both irresponsible and had unprotected sex.
"Do you want to try it?" asked Gray.
The expression on Toru's face changed and he looked at Gray seriously. "Should we?"
...
...
"Yes..."
Surprisingly, both of them almost always agreed with their own decisions.