Ty was delivered to the office of Dr Bonner almost a week after Coach Long and Luke brought up the idea of counselling. They were also the ones to take him to the appointment, following him in to the reception area.
The place was less homely than Dr Goggins'. Mainly because it didn't look like a repurposed home at all, but very much like a clinic built specifically for such purposes.
It TRIED to be comfortable and welcoming, but it just felt off. The reception desk and the area before it was white, and pristine—clinical. Then there was a waiting area jutting off to the left of it which was much too bright. Full of oddly shaped couches and sofas, ranging in colours from lime green to neon yellow to hot pink. It was jarring and distracting. There were books on shelves, and magazines on the coffee table, much like Dr Goggins' reception, but Ty couldn't pay attention to any of them because of the posters on the walls.
There was a play on the classic "hang in there" poster with the cat, except the cat was now doing pull-ups and had a six-pack. The rest weren't much better, like how everyone needs a family, and that everyone COULD be family, showing a picture of a monkey and a dog looking after a baby chick. Again, it was weird, and Ty cringed every time he noticed another one.
Thankfully, the wait wasn't too long before the doctor entered and brought Ty back to a private room. Both Luke and Coach Long remained in the waiting area.
The examination room?—Ty struggled to put an appropriate name to it, as it looked more like a principal's office, but simultaneously too comfortable for such a thing—was small. All it had was a couch on one side, thankfully a non-offensive beige, then Dr Bonner's desk on the other. On the wall was a simple clock, and another large poster, this one emphasising teamwork, as multiple silhouettes helped Sisyphus push and bull his boulder up the mountain.
Dr Bonner moved in and stepped around to the other side of his desk, taking a seat. His monitor was off to the side, giving him a clear view of the couch. 'Please, make yourself comfortable, Tyrese.'
Ty sat, eyeing the man. Dr Bonner was younger than expected, only having wings of grey at his temples, the rest of his neat and short hair was a light brown colour, almost red. He was a bit heavier, though with dimples in his cheeks that made his smile charming, and he was dressed as if he had a golf tournament to go to after Ty's session. He didn't wear glasses over his green eyes, but there was a small mole high on his left cheek.
'So, Tyrese,' Dr Bonner said with all the gravitas as if he were about to start a sixty-minute speech, 'why don't you tell me about yourself? At least as much as you're comfortable with.'
What wouldn't Ty be comfortable sharing? Yet it was a strangely open-ended question. Was he supposed to sing his life story like some bard?
'Let's start simple. Why don't you tell me what you like to do?' Dr Bonner suggested.
'I play football,' Ty said, quieter than usual. Something was off about this chat. Thanks to his time with Dr Goggins, he was used to being under a microscope, but that was mainly physical. This was about him, not his body.
Dr Bonner smiled, jotting in his notepad—doctors sure loved that. 'Football. A great sport. It's good to be active, but there must be more. What do you do when you're not playing football?'
'I read.'
'Keeps the mind sharp. Is that non-fiction or fiction? Do you have a favourite genre?'
'It's a bit of everything.'
Dr Bonner nodded. 'Tell me about school. Is everything going well there?'
Ty had to stop his teeth from grinding. '…It was fine before I got these stupid crutches.'
'Are the other students giving you a hard time because of your crutches?'
'…No.'
There'd only been one, and he wasn't really a student, and the worst thing about Guy had been what he'd said about the seniors, nothing to do with Ty's leg. Most of his problems with the crutches came from himself, even he could see that.
'Hmm. Alright,' Dr Bonner said. 'Why don't you tell me about your crutches. How'd you end up needing them?'
There was a long pause from Tyrese, as his mind went back to the championship game, everything that had happened in the lead up to his injury, everything that his… inner conscious?… had said to him when he was injured, and everything that happened after.
'It's alright if it's too traumatic to talk about in detail. You can just give a quick summary if that's easier.'
Ty's eye twitched. He took a deep breath before explaining in GREAT detail everything that had happened in regards to his injury. Of course, he left out his deliriums regarding the black hole, and The Other.
Throughout, Dr Bonner calmly and quietly listened, jotting notes when something caught his interest.
When Ty was finished retelling the events, Dr Bonner thanked him for sharing, stating it must be hard to relive such a thing. 'It's clear this injury has had a lot of impact on you, and has been a bit of a life-changing moment from what I can tell. Is that why you're seeing me today, do you think?'
Confusion overrode Ty's frustration. 'I'm already seeing a physiotherapist for my leg. Why would I come to a psychologist for it?'
'I'm glad you're taking the correct steps physically, but with injuries—even the most minor, but especially major ones like this—there's always a mental toll as well. Let me rephrase the question—why do you think you're here today?'
'Because my coaches thought it'd be a good idea.'
'Why did you agree?'
'Because I didn't see how it could do any harm.'
'Hmm… why do you think your coaches wanted you to come?'
'Why don't you ask them?'
'I'm asking you.'
Ty sighed, and Dr Bonner still wore that dumb smile, as if he enjoyed frustrating his clients. Finally, Ty said, 'I guess they were worried I'd get depressed or something because of all the shit that's been happening, and how my family basically kicked me out. But I don't care about all that. The only thing annoying me is I can't play football, and I can't train properly. But I'm making progress every day, and every day I get one step closer to being back on my feet, and back on the gridiron where I belong. Nothing else matters.'
There was a long pause as Dr Bonner wrote, then he asked, 'Tell me about your family.'
After another heavy sigh, Ty divulged his story. He explained his situation with his family, and how he'd ended up staying with Luke for the moment. How Coach Long was the best coach possible, helping him with everything, no matter if he had to go way above and beyond what was expected of him. Dr Bonner asked questions here and there whenever he wanted a more in-depth explanation of something, but for the rest of the session it was kept mostly surface level. And then the hour was up.
After parting ways with Dr Bonner and promising to see each other again, Ty walked out of the office and back to the waiting company of Luke and Coach Long. He had… mixed feelings… about his first session. Perhaps it would be his last. Maybe that was a little unfair. While Ty had mostly just explained his situation and why he was there, Dr Bonner had offered some "sage" advice, and even if Ty didn't think most of it landed all that well, it was still an eye-opening experience.
It brought him back to something Dr Goggins' had said about understanding his opponents and being able to read their intentions before they even knew they were planning something.
If he returned for another session, he'd get to see more of how Dr Bonner worked; how he tried to pry open a skull and reveal the secrets of the mind within. Maybe Ty could use some of those methods, or find ways to implement them on the green and white highway of the gridiron.
Of course, he couldn't sit there for an hour and learn his opponent's life story, but there had to be more to it than that. Like how they squirmed when something sensitive was brought up, or what reactions they had when sharing something personal. Maybe Dr Bonner would show his notes if Ty asked.
It seemed like a great idea. If he could really think like his opponent, understanding all that makes them tick, wouldn't he not only know how they'd react and move on the field, but also how best to get under their skin and throw them off their game? It was perfect.
He needed to visit the library again, somehow. Maybe Coach Long would drive him? Or Luke might have one near his house, there seemed to be everything else in the little neighbourhood, why not a library?
But that would have to wait. He had another appointment in what was a rather busy day. The second was with Dr Goggins herself.
Coach Long came in with him, and stayed long enough to meet Dr Goggins, so he could help Ty explain everything that had happened since she'd last seen him. It had been a busy week, and if Dr Goggins was surprised by any of its events, she did a good job of hiding it.
After the story had been told without sparing any detail, Coach Long left the room, saying he'd take Luke back home, then be back to pick up Ty.
Dr Goggins and Ty sat in silence for a time, as if she was letting him bask in his regret and shame; unlike her surprise, she did nothing to hide her frustration.
'Why is it that every other week, you're coming in here, telling me about something stupid you've done to re-aggravate your injury?'
'You heard the story. None of its my fault!'
She raised a brow. 'Really?'
'Yes! It was all out of my control. I did the best I could to react to them.'
'Getting into a fist-fight at school was out of your control?'
Ty looked away, shaking his head. 'He insulted my teammates.' What would she know about brotherhood?
She laughed, but no smile appeared on her lips. 'Your chivalrous camaraderie would be almost admirable if it wasn't so stupid, boy. But okay, let's play by your definition. Even so, how is it you're always finding yourself in such circumstances?'
Wrinkles of thought and confusion dug into his brow. What was she getting at? He thought about her question, and why she asked it, and why such circumstances did happen to him more frequently than others. Was it because he was successful and so much better than others that he bred jealousy with every action, no matter how simple? Maybe it was a grand conspiracy in an attempt to stop his rightful rise to the top. Or maybe the universe itself had it out for him. But no, he couldn't say any of those without sounding like a madman.
In the end, he shrugged. 'Maybe I'm just unlucky.'
'You believe in luck now?'
His frown turned to a scowl, aimed at nothing in particular. She had him there. If luck didn't exist on the football field, it didn't exist anywhere, not even in lotteries. How can one person be called lucky for a statistical certainty—somebody has to win—especially when it comes at the "bad luck" of so many others.
But how else could he describe the events that had been happening to him these past few months if not for bad luck? What did he do to run into that fuckhead Guy? What did he do for his father to abuse him? …What did he do to be born to such a worthless family in the first place?
'I can see you're in a lot of thought over this,' Dr Goggins said. 'That's good. But I hope it's the right kind of thinking. You should reevaluate these situations and your role in them, especially what leads up to each and every one of them. They may feel random, they may feel out of your control, but that's bullshit. You can ALWAYS take control of your situation, no matter how tough it is. There's always something you can be doing to avoid these things, or make them less frequent… that's not to say the blame is with you. Of course you didn't deserve to be abused so badly you no longer felt safe at home, but there can be better ways to resolve things so less misfortune falls on you… maybe leaving home was the best choice for that going forward.'
Ty's frown lessened, but didn't vanish completely. It wasn't exactly what Dr Goggins was saying, but how she was saying it that reminded him of his earlier session with Dr Bonner. It was more of that psychology stuff.
That wasn't to say she didn't have a point. What she said made sense, and he'd bet it could be used on the field as well, or if not, at least in the film room. Maybe everyone was right about his injury—it wasn't a freak accident, but an inevitability with how hard he pushed himself. But if he couldn't push himself that hard, how was he supposed to compete? If he'd taken his foot off the gas even one percent in training, he wouldn't have been near enough Skywalker's level in the first place, so it wouldn't have mattered if he didn't get injured because he simply wouldn't have been good enough. What a conundrum.
'You've got a lot to think about,' Dr Goggins said, 'and it's pretty clear we won't be progressing forward this week, so I won't hold you up for long. You can wait in the lobby, and as soon as your coach is back you can go.'
She checked his knee quickly before he left, making sure he hadn't done WORSE damage to it. Thankfully, it was okay, and the only setback was yet another stalled week.
Though as Dr Goggins walked Ty out to the lobby, she remembered something. 'I hope you've been keeping up with your reading.'
He had, of course, but the question ignited one within Ty as well: 'Do you have any good books on psychology.'
A strange look came over Dr Goggins' face as confusion melted into curiosity, then finally a wry smile settled into place.