This power... was within me...? Sesshomaru thought, looking into the sky.
He narrowed his eyes at the clouds swirling above him, but, before he could call out to the cloud creature for a name or explanation, the divine beast left and the sky returned to the vibrant light blue of the day. Jaken and Yamashi had extinguished the last of the dokkaebi. All went quiet. Yuko started checking on everyone and provided some medical help for injuries, but everyone seemed to be safe. Reijiro checked on Sesshomaru silently, merely pointing at him and the clouds with a raised brow. Sesshomaru nodded to say he was fine and the creature left, earning a nod in return. The soldier went to his brother's side, who was checking on Hikozaemon II and Milady, and suggested a quick scan of the area to ensure no more demons would infiltrate the bazaar. Once approved, the two split up and started checking the living quarters and surrounding areas for damage as well.
The coast was clear, but Sesshomaru had to sit down to think. He hardly paid attention to anything for the rest of the day. Before he knew it, he was on Yamashi's ship again. His journey in Goryeo was complete...
"I take it something bad is about to happen," a familiar voice probed. Sesshomaru looked up to see Prince Yamashi locking eyes with him before sitting down on a squat barrel to talk. "The last time you fought with us, doc's house was gettin' blasted. You didn't use all that power before, though. Are you like us?"
"Us?" Sesshomaru questioned.
Yamashi lifted up his left arm to show his thick gold bracelet and clarified, "Limited. Doc has demons like me and the others wear limiters so we can live with the humans back home."
"... I have lived among half-demons once, but I was never limited in power. My young ward stayed with me for the remainder of her prepubescent years. She is with humans and half-demons now," Sesshomaru replied, returning his attention to the hustle and bustle of this ship's crew.
"I heard about that from Lord Aka. He usually keeps tabs on the politics of the 'outside world'," Yamashi informed, smiling softly.
It felt funny saying it that way, but it was true. That's how the dome-demons referred to the kingdoms and villages outside of Heiwa. Even Heiwa's sister town was considered an outside world because of how traditional it was, and they didn't allow demons to visit at all. It had been that way for centuries. Sometimes, Meioshi had trouble getting along with the people there despite the fact that she enlisted in their army as a youth and as a doctor. According to the woman herself, the villagers gave Arimasa a hard time, too. Suiren never bothered with them. Either the men tried to propose to her or the women shamed her for her Ghost Eye. Both earned Suiren's ire. The sister town keeps a relationship with the hell traveler family and the emperor only because of tradition; otherwise, Heiwa would be minus a sibling.
"None of this happened until after father's death," Sesshomaru reflected, reliving parts of his untold past. "After my first hunt, I was put in his prison as punishment for killing many humans. The reason I killed them was not a selfish one. It was out of vengeance. I may not ever forgive him or my mother for what they did to Homugi and me, but I can accept her animosity towards me because I did little to help. I couldn't do more. I didn't know how to. Being away from the outside world for a year was hard, but I believe it was necessary now. My persistence to protect Homugi, even if it was a little bit, was not in vain. Maybe my perception on the matter is incorrect, but the witch and I are alike in that regard. She was cast away in hell for a time, but she's fighting back hard now to reclaim her peace. Such a thing I could call nostalgic, but it is relatable at the heart of it all. I did the same. Solitary confinement in its purest form is a hell social animals wouldn't understand. But, if you make it work in your favor, the silence is liberating. Your strategies are a little more refined than before. Your use of tactic is a little more surgical. You're even methodical in the way you think. You are no longer emotional. You are efficient. When I was released, I was no longer a boy with aspirations. I was a man on a mission. When I first confronted my father for his crown and swords, I saw him with humans... I didn't believe he would ever fall so far from grace... until I witnessed my brother's conception."
Yamashi jolted up from that bit. Lord Aka and many other demons knew about Inu no Taisho's scandal, but no one knew about what happened in detail. Sesshomaru's hatred was birthed from a different place. Women understood Milady's heartbreak because it was not uncommon among them. They fall in love with a man - maybe he's their first love - and then they warm another's bed or that woman warms theirs. It happens when smitten wife or lover is occupied elsewhere. Betrayed, the wife or lover is changed forever. She lets no one else claim her heart. She might even live in shame. Perhaps her grief takes over, and all feel her wrath. Cruelty is never without a parent. It is often a seed planted in nutritious soil. One can either choose to cultivate it or eliminate the weed through intensive healing.
"No way!" Yamashi responded through whispers. "I thought it was just my old man that mated with an audience."
"He wasn't ceremonious about it. Just selfish," Sesshomaru said quietly, reliving that moment.
It was a humid evening in the summer. Hikozaemon II was looking at the silver wisteria trees, drinking tea as he often did. Sesshomaru wasn't hungry that night and couldn't sleep. He was tired of the idleness; felt it was wasting precious time. He couldn't explain, but he was sensing something wrong. It made him restless. Milady was speaking to the elders about a change in one of their many laws. She tried to escape the questioning, but they wouldn't release her. Tired of being alone at the dinner table, he went to visit his grandfather, but that nagging feeling wouldn't go away. Hikozaemon II sensed his agitation and told him to go where his instincts were taking him...
To this day, he wished he had just stayed by his grandfather's side...
He heard the moaning. Saw the candle lights. Could practically feel the shadows moving behind the sliding doors. They weren't in a guest bedroom or a personal one. It was one far away from handmaids or servants. They were quiet, but his ears were ringing. Burning. It was so quiet. He was a ghost walking through the castle. The guards didn't even notice him, but they never did when he came to retrieve his father. He met Izayoi before, walked the castle grounds, and was polite enough to those who respected his presence. But, that was the end of the niceties. He was no one here. When he saw brown skin and porcelain skin mixing in a soft rhythm, he felt sick. He felt frozen. He was until he locked eyes with his father, caught him by surprise, made him stop. In that instant, the man he looked up to became a worm he had to look down on. Nothing more could be done about it.
He left that night. Refused to be around Toga any longer than he had to. Couldn't do anything for his mother other than try to convince her to stop loving his father, but it was futile. So, he left. He was barely home at all. Only Hikozaemon II ever checked on him, personally. Maybe a few days later, which was months for the humans, Sesshomaru shed tears for the last time. His grandfather could only hold him to ease the pain, but it never erased it. That day, he grieved for his losses and vowed to lose no more.
The scar on Meioshi's chest...
Odd that he didn't see it when they first met. The physical manifestation of his life's vow was in front of him on a humid summer night. When Hon'no stabbed her throat, Sesshomaru was sure the doctor was dead. Nothing could survive such a fatal blow..., but she did. Perhaps the darkening veins around her neck or the rush of adrenaline from a new enemy distracted him from seeing it, but her victory against the black wall demon changed something around them. Call it the atmosphere or the energy or the adventure. Whatever the label, he saw in her what he couldn't see for himself in a moment of total weakness. Freedom. When he smelled Meioshi's blood from that scar and noticed her stifled movements, it was like his freedom was being taken away again. The cage had nothing to do with his rage at the ravine. He was internalizing her injury as a representation of what he had lost.
But...
Her sweet smile, her smoldering hazel eyes, her gentle hands, and her soothing voice was a soft, quiet reminder that hope was not lost. That he was closer to a true victory than he was before. That Naraku might have been a catalyst for change, but it wasn't the change that he really needed. It was a type of change that he needed to fight his hardest for.
"But, perhaps, that is something I can attest to inheriting from my father. I can be quite selfish when I want to," Sesshomaru continued. He spared a glance at Yamashi as he said, "I do wish I were a bit more like you when I left home more frequently. I don't know how hard it was for you to leave the life you knew, but the life you have now is enviable. I went out of my way to see your home. It wasn't a large castle, but it was perfect for you. You have this trade business that sustains you. No legacy to live up to or look down on. You're building your own things. That was something I wanted once, but... I was more selfish then. Instead of trying to build my own kingdom, I tried to rewrite the history of my father's by taking his place in all aspects. My punishment was his death."
"That why you tried to live with humans at one point?" Yamashi asked, humbled by Sesshomaru's words.
"Yes. To understand my father's actions on that sickening night... and to prepare myself to raise the welp he left behind," Sesshomaru admitted bitterly. "Not without a lecture from a feisty, little priestess. It is pity that she perished. The world lost a unique soul. Sadly, I respect my little brother enough to leave his mother's memory alone, but she was not an innocent person. I don't know what she said to my mother or my grandfather, but the reason Inuyasha was abandoned after her death was not out of hatred or disgust."
"She played a part in it then?" Yamashi asked to the winds more than Sesshomaru.
"More than anyone is willing to believe," Sesshomaru hinted.
"Perhaps I was wrong, after all," Yamashi spoke in a primmer and more proper voice. The prince he used to be seemed to resurface for a moment. "I thought maybe you were falling for the doctor the way I did for Yuko. This seems to be a matter of respect and admiration between warriors."
"... You are within your right to believe that. I did not make a convincing effort to say otherwise. I could have learned to love a human if she was like Kanade. She was a spitfire, clumsier than you'd think, but could be serious when the time called for it. She's the reason my skin is soiled now."
"Soiled?" Yamashi asked, raising a brow.
"Inuyasha and I had defeated the warrior gods on Fire Island some time ago," Sesshomaru confessed. "But, when I was there with Kanade fifty years prior to that, I had been marked as a sacrifice. After our victory there, I chose to make the mark permanent in memory of the only human I would ever call a friend."
"Oh, you've got a tattoo?" Yamashi asked, reverting back to his cruder language and voice.
"On my back. It is a flame," Sesshomaru replied.
"Is Doc just a rival to you then? Nothing more? You haven't really been fighting each other much like in the beginning," Yamashi probed.
"... She is a friend. One that I wish I had sooner," Sesshomaru answered. "And, that I fear losing. This power I was granted confuses me. I will have to leave you all sooner to understand it."
"Well, if you're as strong as they say, I'd like to challenge you some day. With work like this, I'm bound to get lazy and fat. It'd be good to stay active," Yamashi said, punching Sesshomaru's shoulder lightly.
"Your wife must be your favorite rival then," Sesshomaru joked.
Yamashi gave a toothy grin before saying, "I like this honest side of you. You're funny."
"I prefer observant," Sesshomaru corrected, looking into the sky to see the clouds shifting.
The creature was still following him...