Earth Land, Ishgar, Kingdom of Fiore, Magnolia.
December 6, x791.
After waking up around nine in the morning, getting cleaned up after last night's activities, and having breakfast, Alfonzo and Grayfia hopped into Alfonzo's Vanquish, and make their way back to Magnolia.
When they arrived, Alfonzo parks the Vanquish in the Mansion on the Lake's underground parking garage. Then, while leaving Grayfia to get back to her other duties as the house's head maid, he makes his way to the guild hall to see what everyone else was up to.
Unsurprisingly, when Alfonzo arrived, he found the entire guild embroiled in a guild—wide brawl with some of the senior members sitting at the bar and enjoying the show. The only exception being Ur, who was right in the middle of the brawl.
"Why am I not surprised?" Alfonzo asked as he approached the bar. "Although this never gets old, it feels like every time I come back, something like this is going on."
"Alfonzo, welcome back." Mavis said with a cheerful smile. "Honestly, I think everyone is just blowing off a bit of steam before the final push for the S-Class Exam."
"Oh, right…" Alfonzo muttered. "That's coming up soon, isn't it?"
"Yup!" Mavis chirped happily. "And this year, I think we'll use Maki's idea from seven years ago. Of course, we won't have them find my grave as a passing condition, though. But I've already taken care of that. So, there's no need to rack our brains to come up with a target."
"Well, I trust your judgement." Alfonzo replied with a shrug. "Honestly, I couldn't have come up with a better idea, anyway."
"Don't sell yourself short, Alfonzo." Mavis said with a smile. "I know you'll do a great job when you're the guild master. You're next in line, after all."
"Please don't put that evil on me, Master mavis.' Alfonzo said with a shudder. "I don't' know what I'd do if I had to spend so much time writing reflection letters."
"Just accept it, Kid.' Gildarts, who was also sitting at the bar, said after taking a swig from his mug of ale. "Every guild master goes through it. And let's be honest, you're the best fit for the position of guild master."
Glancing at Gildarts after he made such a malicious comment, Alfonzo saw that he was wearing a shit-eating grin while trying to hide it behind his mug, and failing spectacularly.
"Don't make me kick your ass, Gildarts." Alfonzo said with a scowl. "Insulting someone by telling the truth is one of the worst ways to do it, you know?"
*Bang!*
Hearing that, Gildarts' smile widened. Then, he chugged down the rest of his drink and slammed it onto the bar top, the mug shattering into tiny cubes thanks to his magic power. He then stood up from his seat and cracked his knuckles, his excited smile now plain to see.
"Why don't we see about that, Kid?" Gildarts asked. "It's been a while since the last time we fought. And we haven't fought since I learned Calamity's name. So, why don't we have a go, and see who the strongest guy in the guild really is?"
"You're paying for the broken mug, Gildarts." Mavis said casually before taking a bite of a pastry. "*Munch* *Munch* *Munch* *Gulp* Oh, and take it outside. The two of you are too strong to have a serious fight in the guild."
Ignoring Mavis, Gildarts continued to stare at Alfonzo with anticipation shining in his eyes.
"Don't worry, master Mavis, I don't really wanna fight this old man." Alfonzo said while waving off Gildarts' challenge. "There's no way that someone I've already defeated will ever defeat me in the future."
"Oh, those are some confident words." Gildarts said challengingly. Though, he knew enough about Alfonzo to know that the younger wizard really would not fight him, at least right now, after saying something like that. So, instead of insisting, he sat back down and ordered another drink.
"Besides, if I really wanted to fight someone to see who the strongest member of the guild is, I would challenge Irene." Alfonzo added. "I'm pretty sure that I could take her if I used my [Bankai]. But if we kept it to levels lower than that, I'm not sure which way the fight would go."
As he spoke, Alfonzo turned to the tall red head sitting next to Mavis, sipping from a glass of wine with a slight smile curling her lips.
"Oh, could it be that you would like to have a match with me, My Love?" Irene asked playfully. "But I thought it was obvious that I was no match for you. You've bested me in all of our bouts since the day we confirmed our relationship, have you not?"
"I-I-Irene!" Mavis squealed with her face bright red. "that's highly inappropriate."
Mavis was not the only one sitting at the bar who understood Irene's inuendo, as Gildarts smirked while picking up his mug to take a swig. Alfonzo, on the other hand, only looked at Irene with a helpless expression on his face.
"If you didn't wanna fight, you could have just said no." Alfonzo said while shaking his head. "I mean, it would be a hassle if Master mavis passed out from a sudden spike in blood pressure, after all."
"She'll be fine." Irene said nonchalantly while waving off Alfonzo's concerns. "Besides, I see no reason for us to fight one another. Especially, since I gain nothing from it."
"Gain nothing, huh?" Alfonzo said while cupping his chin in thought. He then looked up with a roguish grin as he continued. "Well, I'm sure I could come up with something to sweeten the deal for you."
"Oh, could you now?" Irene asked with an eyebrow raised.
"Yeah, I think I could come up with one or two things you would like." Alfonzo said with a shrug. "For example, if you win, I'll let you take the lead for a whole night."
While no one thought it possible, Mavis' face reddened even further when she heard Alfonzo's suggestion. And because of the way her body looked, the embarrassed expression looked right at home on her face. Though, had she looked her actual age, things would be completely different.
"An interesting proposal." Irene said, her smile widening. "Though, to be honest, I've gotten over the need to dominate you in that regard. However, being able to brag about it to that two-faced swordswoman would be quite fun. Ufufufu!"
'Not gonna lie, I expected her to jump on an opportunity like that.' Alfonzo thought to himself while shaking his head. 'But that's not the reason I expected her to do it for. Plus, what the fuck is up with that giggle? It sounds kinda evil.'
"Well then, I guess that means we'll be having a little spar sometime in the near future." Alfonzo said with a smile.
Both Gildarts and Mavis perked up at that. In fact, they were not the only ones, as for some inexplicable reason, the entire guild hall had fallen silent, allowing them all to hear what Alfonzo just said.
Looking away from the bar, Alfonzo, Gildarts, Mavis, and Irene were dumbfounded to see nearly every adult member of the guild lying on the ground, all of their heads turned towards the bar. As for the only two people who were not on the floor, Elicia and Ur, Ur was strung up, hanging from the ceiling with a disgruntled expression on her face while Elicia stood next to her with a wide smile on hers.
"Wow! This fight is gonna be exciting!" Elicia said happily. A moment later, she tilted her head to one side and asked a question. "But where can you two even have a fight like that?"
"Let me down, Lici." Ur grumbled. "This is embarrassing. I'm not into BDSM. Not like your biggest fan, Karen."
"Ugh! Please don't bring her up." Elicia said as her shoulders drooped. "That crazy chick sent me a picture of her tied up in turtle bondage while Erza, Mira, and I were on our way back from the last quest. It was supposed to be some kind of example of how she wanted me to tie her up next time we met."
"At least it wasn't Darkness." Lucy muttered.
"Ugh!" Elicia groaned. "I don't even wanna think about her. I wish I had just run away that first time. It got even worse after Fonzie and I had dinner with her that one time. Now, she thinks we completely accept her preferences. As a result, she's even more fervent when she talks about her fantasies with us."
Several of the ladies living in the mansion, despite being laid out on the floor, openly laughed at Elicia's plight.
"Anyway, when are you and Irene gonna fight?" Elicia asked in a forced cheerful tone. She then continued in a somewhat worried tone. "Is it gonna be soon?"
'I know exactly what she's thinking when she asked that question.' Alfonzo thought while smiling at Elicia reassuringly. 'The war with Alvarez will happen sometime next year. I'm not sure when exactly, though. And with Irene and Brandish jumping ship, that could either push the time forward or backwards, making it even more unpredictable.'
"Of course not." Alfonzo said casually. "I mean, the guild's got some shit to do soon, right? The S-Class Exam is coming up in nine days. Then, I have to oversee the New Year's celebration. And this year, it's happening in Crocus. So, the scale will be even bigger."
"Oh, I kinda forgot about that." Elicia said in a cutesy tone while tilting her head to the right and knocking on it with her right hand. She then put on a contemplative expression while looking around at all the laid out guild members. "Actually, now that I think about it, why aren't there more people running around to complete last minute quests?"
"Because everyone already knows who Master Mavis is gonna choose." Wakaba said while rubbing his jaw where he took a punch from Macao not long ago. "I mean, it's kinda obvious at this point."
"Yeah." Macao added while rubbing his lower back. "Damn it, I'm getting too old for this. But anyway, it's probably gonna be Saeko, Rika, Wendy, Lucy, Bisca, Ed, Al, and Lisanna. Especially after Lisanna got that new [Take Over] a few days ago. I don't know if anyone in the guild can take a hit from more than one of her tails at the same time."
"I probably could." Alfonzo said cheerfully while raising his right hand high over his head.
"He's talking about regular guild members." Wakaba barked back. "Not freaks who use that creepy living metal to strengthen their bodies like regular wizards take morning jogs."
"I could do it, too, Loser." Gajeel said with his usual challenging grin on his face. "Nothing can break an iron dragon's scales."
"Yeah, right, Metal Head!" Natsu shouted. "My Lisanna would kick your butt!"
"What did you say, Salamander?" Gajeel asked angrily as he spun to face Natsu.
"You heard me!" Natsu shouted back as he jumped up to his feet.
"You trying to pick a fight?" Gajeel asked.
"Any time, Metal Head!" Natsu shouted.
And just like that, the Fire and Iron Dragon Slayers began fighting again. Meanwhile, the rest of the guild mostly ignored them in favor of continuing the conversation.
"You know, although those two are always fighting, too..." Alfonzo said as he turned away from Natsu and Gajeel. "It still feels off when something so stupid isn't the trigger for a fight between Gray and Natsu instead."
"I know what you mean." Elicia said as she approached the bar. "And although I know it's my imagination, the guild feels quieter without Gray starting fights with Natsu and getting yelled at for stripping in the middle of the guild and Juvia gushing over Gray at every opportunity."
"Well, there's nothing we can do about that." Irene said after ordering a glass of wine. "They're on an undercover assignment, after all."
"By the way, who thought that was a good idea, anyway?" Alfonzo asked curiously. "I mean, Gray taking his clothes off everywhere is kind of a well-known thing, right? Does anyone really think he can stop himself from doing that for... How long have they been gone, anyway?"
"I actually forgot about that when I let them accept that quest." Mavis said in an embarrassed tone. "I mean, I'm usually up in my office. So, I kinda forgot he has that habit."
"I'm sure the kid will be fine." Gildarts said with a smile. "He was trained by Ur, after all."
Everyone at the bar nodded while most of the wizards on the floor started to get up and go back to whatever it was they were doing before the brawl broke out.
"So, you still remember me, huh?" Ur, in a menacing tone, asked.
While Gildarts looked scared after hearing Ur's voice, everyone else at the bar smiled playfully as they all turned to look at Ur, who was still hanging from the ceiling.
"Oops..." Elicia muttered bashfully.
"It's good to see you hanging around with the rest of us, Ur." Alfonzo said in a cheeky tone. He then turned towards Elicia again and asked the question that had been on his mind. "By the way, what started the brawl this time?"
"Oh, it's 'cause I slipped up and called Ur auntie again." Elicia replied with a shrug.
'By this point, you're doing this on purpose, right?' Everyone in the guild hall thought to themselves while looking at Elicia with blank expressions.
"Why are you all looking at me like that?" Elicia asked in a feigned tone of confusion. "Is there something on my face?"