At some point, the atmosphere inside the carriage became completely suffocating.
Or rather, Remesis felt as if she had suddenly been engulfed in flames — so sharp and unbearable was this heat constricting her chest from within.
The woman before her first whispered something desperately, then began kissing her hand like a possessed person. Her hot lips touched the back of Remesis's palm with such pleading, as if her life depended on it.
"I can't listen to this anymore..." the princess of the north caught herself thinking, feeling everything inside her clench from a strange, almost painful tension.
Remesis took a deep breath, intending to push the princess away once more. But she didn't even budge. On the contrary, she held her even tighter, leaving not the slightest chance for escape.
"I haven't heard it yet," Asil's voice was quiet, but an unshakable determination could be felt in it. "The words you are supposed to say."
"..."
"Or... are my embraces so repulsive to you, wife?"
"..."
Remesis looked into Asil's eyes for a long time — from above, because the princess had bowed before her, like before a statue of an ancient deity. In this gaze, she tried to find the answer to the question that had tormented her since the very beginning of this journey. "What the hell are you really thinking...?" Remesis could not understand it.
Until now, it was difficult for her to shake the feeling that behind this devoted, almost innocent expression of the face, something much deeper and darker was actually hiding. Something she had been missing all this time.
"That's not the point... I'm just hot," Remesis finally breathed out.
"Hot?" the princess repeated, tilting her head slightly.
"Yes..." Remesis looked away. "If you don't mind... I would like to step out for a while. Get some fresh air."
In truth, this was just an excuse. Remesis simply wanted to run away from the princess right now, to interrupt this strange and painful conversation before it went any further. It seemed to her that if they continued, the consequences would be far more unpredictable.
Remesis desperately wanted to get out of this trap.
Moreover, the excuse itself was terribly absurd. After all, by that time they had already entered the territory of the northern region, where even in summer the snow does not melt from the mountain peaks, and the wind chills to the bone. And here, in the middle of this icy desert, she suddenly felt hot? It sounded absurd.
But Asil, meanwhile, didn't bat an eye. She merely smiled slightly — that calm, almost mesmerizing smile of hers.
"...Alright, as you wish."
And the princess simply released her.
So easily, so quickly, that all of Remesis's previous futile attempts to break free suddenly seemed laughable.
Nevertheless, the hand that the princess's lips had touched still burned, as if scorched by fire. The heat did not subside, pulsing under her skin with a persistent, almost frightening warmth.
Although Remesis had initially only lied about feeling hot, perhaps it wasn't such a lie after all. Because the girl indeed felt heat. Such heat, as if she had just miraculously escaped from the very center of a fire.
"...I'll take a short walk and be back soon," she added as indifferently as possible, but still couldn't raise her head.
Remesis mechanically rubbed the back of her hand, as if trying to cool the remaining heat. But the touch still pulsed on her skin like a fiery trail, refusing to disappear.
However, the princess said imperturbably:
"We are not far from the border now. Demonic beasts may be encountered here. It would be better if we go together."
Remesis immediately tried to object:
"There's no need. I can just take someone from the guard..."
But Asil shook her head, and a firmness that brooked no objection flickered in her golden eyes.
"No. I cannot entrust my wife's safety to someone else."
"..."
And so they went together.
Although Remesis had started this only to escape from the princess, they still ended up side by side. So was there any point to it at all? Her entire attempt to gain freedom merely resulted in a change of scenery — but not of the essence.
Nevertheless, what was done was done. Remesis had no choice but to accept it and go on this unscheduled walk with the princess.
Asil quickly gave orders for a short halt, and soon the carriage stopped near the border. When they stepped outside, Remesis looked around.
Before them stretched an endless snow-covered plain, sparkling under the pale northern sun. It seemed there were no suitable places for a walk here anymore. Remesis had no choice but to head towards the nearest forest. Asil silently followed her, staying slightly behind, but invariably close.
Remesis walked forward, carefully looking only at her feet. The snow creaked under her boots, the wind stirred the sparse branches of the trees, and this monotonous, soothing rhythm should have helped her calm her anxiety.
It didn't help.
For a while, they walked in silence. This silence pressed down on her shoulders like a heavy weight, but Remesis still didn't dare to speak first.
She feared that if she started a conversation now, it would inevitably return to that very topic they hadn't finished in the carriage. Remesis wanted that least of all, so she continued to remain silent, secretly hoping that they would simply manage to finish the walk peacefully and return to the carriage, as if nothing had happened.
Her gaze furtively slid to the side, to where the princess was walking.
Asil was looking straight ahead, and her profile — chiseled, flawless, as if carved from marble — seemed completely serene now. Snowflakes were tangled in her silver hair, and this sight was strangely... beautiful.
Remesis hastily looked away.
Nevertheless, Remesis could not stop thinking about the words she had spoken earlier.
"Wife, you have never asked what it is that I want..."
Indeed... was that so?
At that moment, Remesis realized: she truly had never asked.
Not then, at the very beginning, when they were just making their contract. Not during those long years they spent side by side, making plans and preparing for war. Not once.
Why?
Because it seemed to her that the answer was obvious. That she already knew Asil's desires. Weren't they the same? Wasn't this what she wanted for both of them?
Freedom. Revenge. Power.
Remesis was sure she understood the princess. That their goals were one and the same. That Asil's desire — to destroy the imperial family and ascend the throne — was as clear and logical as her own — to wipe the Carter house off the face of the earth.
But now...
She thought about it for the first time.
What if I was wrong?
This thought was like ice water poured over her head.
What if all this time I was looking at her and only seeing the reflection of my own desires?
Remesis suddenly realized that she did not know the answer to the simplest question.
What desire could Asil have? What could be more significant than revenge? What could be more important than power? This thought had never even occurred to Remesis — it seemed impossible.
And yet... what was she to do now? What desire could possibly lurk in the heart of the bloodthirsty northern devil?
Remesis did not know.
And from this ignorance, a cold spread inside her, having nothing to do with the northern wind.
She walked on, immersed in her thoughts, and did not notice how the forest around became denser, the path narrower. She did not notice that the princess had closed the distance between them. She did not notice anything — until the moment a voice tore through the silence:
"...Wife."
Remesis flinched.
She flinched so hard that she almost slipped on the snow.
The girl involuntarily swallowed. At that moment, she tensed, subconsciously preparing to hear anything.
Was she really going to return to that conversation?
"Then I will tell you what I want..."
Remesis grew even more nervous, not understanding herself what exactly she was afraid of — hearing the answer or never finding it out.
But...
"What am I to you?"
The question that came from the princess's lips sounded completely unexpected.
Remesis looked at her in confusion.
"What?"
"What am I to you?" Asil repeated the question, not looking away. She was looking somewhere ahead, at the snowy trail leading deep into the forest, but Remesis felt that all the princess's attention was focused on her. "I suddenly became curious. I have never asked this. How do you truly feel about me?"
"What... I..."
The princess suddenly stopped and looked directly at her. Her golden eyes, without a shadow of hesitation, bored into Remesis's face, not allowing her to look away.
"Do you consider me your wife, a cohabitant, a comrade... Or, perhaps, a bloodthirsty monster?" she uttered the last words with a light, almost imperceptible smirk.
When this question was posed point-blank, Remesis also had to stop. Her heart began to pound somewhere in her throat. She was confused, agitated, bewildered. Why was Asil suddenly asking her this? What lay behind this question?
"Wife, we will not move from this spot until you answer."
Remesis swallowed.
She did not know why this woman suddenly began to insist on an answer. And yet... as paradoxical as it might sound, each of the listed meanings was correct. A wife by contract, a cohabitant with whom she shared a roof, an ally who could be relied upon in a difficult moment — and that was the truth.
Just as it was also true that Remesis considered her a bloodthirsty monster. Because Asil was a monster.
So how could she answer a question that had no single answer?
After hesitating for a moment, Remesis finally said:
"...Wife. I consider you my wife."
After all, at this moment, they were indeed married. And this was the only definition she could voice aloud.
Asil was silent for a short while. And then she chuckled quietly — as if not surprised, as if she had known in advance that she would receive exactly this answer.
"...In that case," the princess's voice became lower, almost hoarse, and an unfamiliar depth appeared in it, "If you truly consider me your wife..."
Asil took a step forward.
One step — and the distance between them closed to a minimum. Remesis felt the warmth emanating from her body, felt the smell of snow and frost, mixed with something sweet and dangerous.
"I want to feel your sincerity."
The northern wind rushed between them, stirring up snow dust. Remesis froze, unable to move.
"...What?"
Remesis looked at her in confusion, feeling everything inside her freeze in a vague premonition.
"Ever since we got married, this status has only been formal," Asil's hand, which suddenly found itself on her wrist, tightened its grip. Remesis did not notice when the princess had managed to get so close, when her fingers — long, cold, strong — had clasped her hand, depriving her of the ability to retreat. "But in reality... have we ever done anything as a married couple?"
Remesis swallowed. The lump in her throat became almost painful.
This was paradoxical. But, perhaps, deep down she had already understood what exactly the princess was driving at... Understood — and because of that, the air around became as suffocating as inside the carriage.
"I want to do it here," Asil said firmly, not taking her burning gaze off her. "Right now."