Once the meeting was done and the hall cleared, Arthur did seem to have some words for me in private.
"It doesn't sit right with me that it's acceptable for others with a vision to sacrifice themselves..."
"..."
I gave him a long stare.
"I know, I may be dragging this subject, but... how do I say this? You suggest that I am more valuable, almost protected in a sense. What I mean to say is that it's rather hypocritical that they're asked to give their lives up so easily while I am denied from even entertaining the possibility of death."
"You're right, I agree," I nodded earnestly. "Remind me, Arthur, how do I lead?"
"..." He paused, realising the meaning behind his words. "By example."
"Following your own logic, I should be willing to sacrifice myself as well, no? Otherwise, I suddenly become a hypocrite..."
"... That's... different. You're the Emperor."
I knew he'd backtrack. His initial argument had that flaw from the very beginning.
"And you're the greatest knight in the Realm. Not all men are equal - they never were. You are, indeed, more valuable than any other man in my Empire. Even if you were devoid of magic, devoid of any knightly skill... this would still remain true. You are more than just a brother to me, I don't think there's even a word to describe it..."
"Without you, I become a shadow of myself. A broken man with a perpetual hatred for the world. Is that what you seek?"
"... Of course not," Arthur shook his head. "It was a foolish remark on my part, from the very beginning."
"I understand, for I feel the exact same thing as you do," I smiled slightly. "I feel it in every battle. Why do you think I always fight at the front? Why do I always try to minimise our losses? Serving a master who is not even aware of your existence and treats you as a disposable pawn... I know full well what it's like from the other side."
"... But, in the end, I can't save everyone. Such is life. The reason why I forbid you from throwing your life away is..." I grabbed his shoulder firmly. "Because you are the key to the future. Regardless of what happens, I know I can entrust it to you."
"You can't trust yourself?" Arthur raised an eyebrow.
"I am a chaotic, unpredictable individual who is capable of great change at a whim... even I'm not certain of what could become of me. One thing that is certain: losing you never bodes well for me. You are my anchor - what keeps me grounded."
"... I understand," Arthur nodded. "I won't inquire regarding this topic again."
"Good. Now, get all of your business out of the way before we leave... try not to take too long."
"I'll try to be quick," Arthur smiled, nodding.
"Tell Sansa and Rhaerra I said hi," I chuckled, shaking my head.
...
"I take it you'll be flying in for an early confrontation..." Dorian remarked.
He had ruled Meeren for some time, growing bored and eventually returning to court. Or, more accurately, he saw the writing on the wall and escaped before the city went into chaos. It was more of the latter, no doubt. He did not live out the 'canon' Daario's fate of being stranded and forgotten in Meereen... my sellsword is too good for that.
"Something like that, yes."
"I suppose the more times you can exhaust and regenerate your magic, the more of an impact you'll leave over time..." Dorian nodded. "Be careful to not fly too deep. It wouldn't suit the Emperor of the Eternal Throne to die at twenty..."
"Hahaha," I laughed. "It would be quite ironic, I suppose. Then again, I believe that all men die twice. The second time would be when their name fades from the world along with their deeds."
"All names will fade with enough time. Heroes become legends and legends become myths. What was once true is twisted and becomes blurred, piece by piece it fades until nothing of the past is left."
"The earth will always remember... even as men long since forget. And the men who see through the earth will eventually uncover the truth of it all," I smiled, shaking my head. "I've seen Azor Ahai forge Lightbringer and temper it, I've seen Elenei descend and trade her immortality for a life with Durran Godsgrief, I've seen the original wielder of my Sunpiercer block out the sun."
"All that dies is reborn in time."
"... An enviable ability to have," Dorian nodded. "To see the past in all clarity."
"It's a bit of a curse as well... for the mystery of the world fades."
"Servant, my food here tastes too good," Dorian laughed. "And my wine is too rich."
"... Fair enough," I chuckled. "It is more of a gift, of course. Still, some things are not quite as great as I imagined them to be. That is a little disappointing."
"Who doesn't like to exaggerate their deeds?"
"To be honest, I'd rather my story be accurate..." I remarked.
"There is nothing to exaggerate, you are already absurd," Dorian laughed. "So much so that you'll become a myth sooner than you'd like. That fleet-sized kraken you slew? Best of luck having anyone believe that a couple of hundred years later..."
"Unless I am immortal myself..."
"Oh?" Dorian looked amused. "If possible, it would be quite the burden... especially if you cannot share that immortality. You would watch the world you knew decay and die, slowly... until it becomes entirely foreign to you. In all honesty, it would not suit you."
"So many blessings that carry curses of their own. It's almost as if the ones who carry the most blessings are also the most cursed."
"It tends to be so," Dorian nodded. "I could have died in my first pitfight, but I kept winning, and so the scars continued to pile on. I fell in love, only to realise that I could not sire any children and... lost it soon enough. I earned my freedom, only to be burdened by my choices and decisions. I learned more of my family, only to put an end to their attempt at restoration as they stood against what I believed in. I have refined my talent to kill, only to be haunted by the hundreds of men that I've put down."
"Truly, the longer you live, the more you endure and suffer," Dorian laughed, shaking his head. "But we keep treading on, hoping it leads to something worthwhile. It's our instinct to survive... no matter what lies beyond that."
"I couldn't have said it better myself. Although, admittedly, I do have a lot to look forward to... I just have to get past this obstacle."
"You possess the power to accomplish that. You need only apply it the right way."
"Mhm... I do have options," I nodded.
I oversaw the court evacuation and ensured there was no uproar. They went by ship, which made it a swifter affair. Panic began to set in, but I reassured them that there was nothing to worry about. My speech ability made it quite simple. The illusion of everything being fine was better than outright chaos...
Afterwards, we hopped on our respective dragons and soared.
I decided to fly ahead, pushing Viserion past his brothers. Viserion had been trained specifically for speed, stamina and manoeuvrability by me, so he naturally had an edge. No one could enhance a dragon's attributes like I could with magic, either... so Viserion was simply in a class of his own when I was riding him.
It was not long before I was clear of the other two.
Every additional day was an opportunity to devastate the Night King's forces.
Along the way, I had a bit of a crazy idea...
Viserion was getting hungry, but instead of feeding him preserved meat or dried fish, I decided to do a little gambling. Just a little. My body was an ocean of magic where even a singular drop of my blood carried great power. Dragons were, in fact, created from either wyverns or firewyrms using blood magic... so it made me wonder...
"You hungry? I got a meal like no other."
I drew out Stormfyre, which was Blackfyre reforged with a mix of perfect Edricarian steel and the old Valyrian steel. Out of all blades, it was the sharpest and deadliest I had ever grasped... except for Lightbringer. Lightbringer was far more powerful - unfortunately, it broke after a swing or two upon hitting anything, as it was not tempered and refused to be without a 'proper' sacrifice.
Still, Stormfyre got the job done...
I positioned my right arm and began sawing at it with Aero magic. Electro healed me no matter the context, I was largely immune to Pyro and my Hydro was primarily trained upon healing... so it only left my trusty wind.
Still, it took quite a lot of effort. I didn't ever imagine cutting myself would be so difficult. My body was naturally like steel thanks to its draconic traits. My arms, especially, it seemed...
"Here we go."
After chopping my right arm off, I tossed it further ahead and watched as Viserion snagged it.
"Hopefully, you don't explode."
He did, in fact, explode... to some extent. The dragon roared as it opened its jaws, lightning sparking and swirling within. I closed up my wound pretty quickly, observing. Viserion grumbled, seemingly almost crying as it managed to swallow everything.
"I can't taste that bad, can I?" I scratched my hair. "Am I too spicy or something?"
As I exchanged thoughts with Viserion, I felt his pain. It was like a storm erupting within your body, burning, swirling, electrifying. It was like food poisoning, but a hundred times worse. Like a virus, it was spreading... conquering everything in its path. My blood was actively destroying, reshaping and replacing Viserion's cells. He could very well perish.
I didn't expect such a drastic reaction... swiftly making him land and trying to smooth the process with my own magic. The changes were not internal alone. Eventually, Viserion's external appearance began to change as well. His gold became more prominent, and even a surge of purple scales started to replace the previously cream-coloured ones. He grew more horns on his head, his wings began to expand... Viserion was undergoing a whole transformation.
"Just with one arm of mine..."
Once he had been 'reborn', Viserion was unlike any other dragon.
...
We soared through the Realm, speeding past the lands beneath. The Wall was not so far as it seemed. I took a moment for myself, observing the Plane of Euthymia. The tree symbolising my magic was massive now, its petals shifting between a soft purple and gold.
It was not so far now... the conflict that would decide it all.
Suddenly, the world changed to a much brighter one. Saturised, colourful. It looked like Inazuma... the land which Raiden had reigned over.
"Don't you think you deserve to claim what is yours?"
I heard a voice that was all too familiar, despite having not heard it in so long. It had accompanied me for so many years... it would be one of the last things I could forget.
"All you have to do is sacrifice one woman... for the world, for yourself... and for me. Or one man, for that matter - what would the difference be? We could be together, forever, as we always wanted to be."
I felt her warm embrace from behind. It was the hardest thing not to turn around and indulge the illusion. She was not real... and Raiden herself would never make such a suggestion.
This illusion... was the manifestation of my doubts.
"Why undertake this uncertain path? Why risk yourself and your future? You know the fate of most heroes is simply tragedy... is that what you truly want? You used to laugh at that thought, you still pretend to do so, and yet you entertain it in your heart. For what?"
"Why?" I questioned. "I stand on a mountain of fallen foes, comrades and sacrifices already. Alysanne... Rolan... Robert... Mandon and Arys... Arya... Raiden. Over a hundred thousand men have perished for my desires. I've put myself before so many others, stepping higher and higher. No more."
"It is my solemn duty to protect... and I'll accomplish that much, even if it kills me."
"That is the resolve that will drive you to victory," The voice said. "You've come far..."
The illusion faded, leaving me staring at the same tree.
I was prepared for anything.
I feared nothing.
I had a clear purpose, a clear goal...
To lead the path for a better tomorrow.