CHAPTER NINETY: THE THINGS WE DIDN'T SAY
For a few seconds, I simply stared down at Gift.
The hostel was unusually noisy that night.
Girls moved around carrying buckets.
Some were arguing over whose turn it was to sweep the room the next morning.
Others were discussing assignments that nobody intended to complete that night.
The usual boarding school chaos.
Yet somehow, Gift's question managed to stand out above all of it.
"Have you ever liked somebody and wished you didn't?"
The question sounded simple.
But it wasn't.
Not even close.
Because the way she asked it—
The hesitation.
The sigh before it.
The look on her face.
It felt personal.
Very personal.
I closed my novel slowly.
Then looked at her properly.
"Why are you asking?"
Gift immediately rolled her eyes.
"Why do you always answer questions with questions?"
"Because your questions are suspicious."
That earned a small laugh from her.
A genuine one.
Not the forced laughs people used when trying to avoid a conversation.
An actual laugh.
Then she sat on the edge of her bed and looked away.
For a moment, neither of us spoke.
I waited.
Eventually, she sighed again.
"I don't know."
That answer alone told me she definitely knew.
People only said I don't know when they didn't want to explain.
I decided not to push.
Instead, I answered her original question.
Quietly.
Honestly.
"Yes."
Gift looked up.
"Yes?"
I nodded.
"Yes."
The room suddenly felt smaller.
Not physically.
Emotionally.
Because for the first time in a long while, we were having a conversation that wasn't about hostel matters or classroom arrangements.
A real conversation.
Gift stared at me for a few seconds.
Then asked:
"What happened?"
I laughed softly.
"What do you mean what happened?"
"You said yes."
"I did."
"So what happened?"
I shook my head.
"No."
"No?"
"No."
Gift frowned.
"Why?"
"Because I answered your question. That's enough."
She looked annoyed.
I felt slightly proud of myself.
Now she knew how frustrating she could be.
For a moment, we simply stared at each other.
Then both of us laughed.
Unexpectedly.
Simultaneously.
The moment felt strange.
Because despite sharing a room corner for months, neither of us had ever laughed together like that.
Not properly.
Not naturally.
Not without tension hiding somewhere underneath.
But tonight felt different.
Maybe because we were both tired.
Maybe because we were both confused.
Or maybe because liking somebody had made both of us vulnerable.
Whatever the reason, the hostility that had existed between us seemed smaller than usual.
Not gone.
Just smaller.
Then Gift asked the question I had been avoiding.
"Is it Samuel?"
My heart nearly abandoned me.
Immediately.
I stared at her.
She stared back.
Waiting.
Calmly.
Patiently.
Dangerously.
I laughed.
Too quickly.
Too loudly.
Too suspiciously.
"What kind of question is that?"
"The kind I asked."
"No."
The answer came out automatically.
The same automatic lie I had been telling everybody.
Victoria.
Morayo.
Daniel.
Now Gift.
"No."
Gift raised an eyebrow.
Exactly the way Victoria usually did when she didn't believe me.
Apparently everybody had joined the same club.
"Hm."
I pointed at her.
"Stop doing that."
"Doing what?"
"That hm thing."
She smiled.
Which was the exact opposite of stopping.
Wonderful.
Absolutely wonderful.
Then she lay down on her bed.
Looking up at the ceiling.
The conversation should have ended there.
It really should have.
Unfortunately, my curiosity finally won.
Again.
"Is it Samuel?"
Gift froze.
Only briefly.
But I noticed.
Then she laughed softly.
A dangerous laugh.
The kind that revealed absolutely nothing.
"What kind of question is that?"
I immediately groaned.
"Seriously?"
She grinned.
"Now you understand how annoying you sound."
I rolled my eyes.
Traitor.
Complete traitor.
For a few moments, neither of us spoke.
The room gradually became quieter.
More girls climbed into their bunks.
The senior girl moved around reminding people about lights-out.
The night was slowly settling.
Then unexpectedly, Gift spoke again.
"You know something funny?"
"What?"
"We are both terrible at answering questions."
I couldn't even argue.
Because she was right.
Painfully right.
...
The next morning arrived faster than expected.
As boarding school mornings always did.
One moment you were sleeping.
The next moment somebody was banging a bucket against the floor and shouting for everybody to wake up.
Cruel behaviour.
Completely cruel.
By assembly time, I was still sleepy.
By first period, I was sleepy and annoyed.
By second period, I was sleepy, annoyed and hungry.
An excellent combination.
I was trying to copy notes when somebody dropped a folded piece of paper onto my desk.
I looked up.
Samuel.
Of course.
Who else?
I frowned.
"What is this?"
"Open it."
Immediately suspicious.
Very suspicious.
I unfolded the paper carefully.
Inside was a single sentence.
"You never answered my question."
I looked up immediately.
Samuel was already facing front.
Pretending innocence.
Pretending he wasn't responsible.
Pretending badly.
I stared at the note again.
Then grabbed my pen.
Underneath his sentence, I wrote:
"Which one?"
I folded it.
Passed it back.
A few seconds later, another note returned.
"Why do you care?"
My heart betrayed me instantly.
That question again.
The same question from yesterday.
The one I had successfully escaped because of the bell.
Unfortunately, there was no bell this time.
Just Samuel.
And his irritating persistence.
I stared at the note.
Then at him.
He was still facing front.
Still pretending innocence.
I hated him slightly.
Just slightly.
Then I wrote:
"Curiosity."
Folded it.
Returned it.
A minute later, another reply appeared.
"Liar."
I nearly laughed.
Nearly.
But our teacher was currently explaining something important.
Or at least important to everybody except me.
I looked at Samuel.
He finally turned.
Just slightly.
Just enough for me to see the smile he was trying to hide.
The annoying smile.
The dimple smile.
The smile that made everything more complicated.
I quickly looked away.
Before my face embarrassed me.
Again.
...
Break period eventually arrived.
Students rushed out of class.
The noise level immediately tripled.
I remained seated.
Still thinking about the note.
Still thinking about Samuel.
Still thinking about Gift's question from last night.
Life was becoming very stressful.
Then suddenly—
"Floral."
I looked up.
Victoria.
Morayo.
And unfortunately—
Daniel.
The complete package of problems.
Wonderful.
Daniel sat on the desk in front of me.
Looking unusually excited.
Which meant trouble.
Definitely trouble.
"What happened now?"
Victoria grinned.
"You won't believe what we heard."
Immediately exhausted.
"I don't want to."
"You do."
"I don't."
"You do."
Morayo nodded.
"You actually do."
I sighed.
"What is it?"
The three of them exchanged looks.
Then Daniel smiled.
A very dangerous smile.
The type that never brought good news.
Then he said:
"The rumour wasn't about Gift."
The words landed like a stone.
Immediately.
My heartbeat paused.
Just for a second.
Then resumed.
Faster than before.
Because if the rumour wasn't about Gift...
Then who exactly had asked Samuel out?
And why did I suddenly feel like the answer was going to make everything much more complicated?