Adam sat on the balcony of his bedroom, his gaze wandering toward the dark, starless night sky.
His heart was in turmoil. Restlessness and anxiety made his chest feel tight, as though a heavy weight was pressing down on him from within.
The phone call from Natasha had left his heart pounding uncontrollably.
"I want to talk to you tomorrow morning. It's important."
The message was short, simple, and straight to the point. Yet somehow, it had left Adam feeling completely unsettled.
"I don't even know what I'm feeling anymore."
"I'm not lying to myself. I really do love Natasha. I love her more than I can put into words."
"She's beautiful, simple, and intelligent. She's even the youngest doctor at the hospital, completing her specialist training before she was even twenty-seven."
"She became an oasis in the middle of my desert, filling the emptiness in my heart after I'd spent so long trapped in the friend zone with Marissa."
"But I can't deny that Marissa still has a place in my heart. She's my first love. My childhood love—the one whose feelings for me were never returned."
"Her presence can still make my heart race whenever she hugs me affectionately."
"Even though I know that Noah is still the only man in Marissa's heart. Ever since we were children, I've only been a bridge connecting her to the man she truly loves."
"How is it that I've never been Noah in Marissa's eyes? Why has she always been so obsessed with him?"
"Even though I've always been there for her. Noah himself has never even considered her presence."
Adam closed his eyes and let the cool night breeze drift into his room, hoping it would soothe the heat burning inside his chest and calm his restless thoughts.
---
"Adam, I'm sorry. I keep causing you so much trouble," Marissa said with a grimace as Adam examined her swollen, sprained ankle after she had fallen in the bathroom earlier.
"It's okay, Ris. We've been friends since we were kids. You're here with only the maid. Your parents are both overseas. If I don't help you, who will?" Adam said as he carefully wrapped a bandage around her ankle.
"Thank you," Marissa whispered.
"Adam, does Noah know that I fell?" she asked quietly.
"No. I haven't had a chance to tell him yet," Adam replied shortly.
"Could you call Noah for me? Just tell him that I fell."
"Noah is driving, Ris. I'll tell him tonight," Adam replied.
For some reason, Adam felt a little irritated when Marissa asked about Noah.
"How do you know he's driving?" Marissa asked curiously.
"He's delivering the wedding dress to Natasha's house. I was supposed to take it there earlier, but since you fell, Noah had to deliver it instead," Adam explained.
"Couldn't he have picked it up himself? Why does he have to trouble Noah? Noah is already so busy," Marissa said irritably.
Hearing Marissa criticize Natasha struck a nerve with Adam.
When he saw the jealousy and anger in Marissa's eyes, he suddenly felt as though he didn't recognize the woman sitting in front of him.
"Why are you talking like that, Ris? It sounds like you really hate Natasha. What has she ever done to you?"
Hearing the irritation in Adam's voice, Marissa seemed to realize that she had gone too far.
"I'm sorry. That's not what I meant. You misunderstood me. Natasha is your fiancée, after all. If the two of them are alone together, I'm just worried that something might happen between them," Marissa replied in a softer, almost childish tone.
"Ris, Natasha and I have been together for almost four years. We love each other. Noah and Natasha are close too. She's also close to Monica."
"And she's close to Mom as well. They've gone out together countless times, and Noah often drives them. Not once have they ever done anything inappropriate," Adam said defensively.
"That's because they were with Mom, Adam. This is different. They're alone together now," Marissa whispered, subtly trying to plant doubt in his mind.
"I've also asked Noah several times to take Natasha home when I was busy and couldn't pick her up myself. Their relationship has never crossed any boundaries," Adam replied.
"You really trust them that much? Aren't you afraid something might happen between them because they spend so much time together?"
The irritation and jealousy were obvious in Marissa's trembling voice, as though she were struggling to hold back tears.
"Enough, Ris. Don't ruin the mood. Noah isn't the kind of person who would betray his own brother, and Natasha is a good and faithful woman," Adam said firmly.
Marissa finally fell silent.
Perhaps because she heard the irritation in Adam's voice, she decided not to argue any further or make the situation worse.
Still, the anger in her brown eyes was unmistakable. She could only suppress it by biting her lower lip.
---
Ever since the previous night, Adam had been carrying an uncomfortable feeling he couldn't shake.
He kept wondering what Natasha really wanted to talk to him about. He could even sense the anger hidden beneath her soft voice the night before.
Is Natasha jealous because I had dinner at Mayang's place last night and stayed there until after ten?
Or is she angry because I didn't take her to the boutique?
Shouldn't she understand? We can go to the boutique anytime, while Marissa fell in the bathroom and I had no idea how serious her condition was. As a doctor, Natasha should understand that a patient has to come first.
Those thoughts continued to circle in his mind, making Adam increasingly uneasy.
His anxiety had made it difficult for him to think clearly since he woke up that morning.
The ringing of his phone suddenly broke through his thoughts.
Natasha's name appeared on the screen.
Before answering, Adam took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. He could only hope Natasha wouldn't notice how uneasy he had been feeling.
"Hello, sweetheart," Adam greeted her warmly, deliberately making his voice sound cheerful.
"Hello, Mas. Assalamu'alaikum. Don't forget, we're having breakfast together tomorrow morning. There's something we need to talk about," Natasha said.
"Waalaikumsalam. Of course, sweetheart. Where do you want to eat? Should we just eat at the cafeteria?"
"The restaurant across the street is fine. Is that okay, Mas? Don't take me anywhere far. I have to accompany Dr. Umar on rounds at nine."
"All right. Wait for me at the clinic. I'll pick you up there, okay, sweetheart?" Adam replied gently.
"Okay, Mas," Natasha answered softly.
"I'll let you go for now, sweetheart. I'm a little busy. Love you," Adam said before ending the call.
"Okay," Natasha replied without returning his declaration of love.
Her cold response only made Adam feel even more uneasy.
---
"What are you having, sweetheart?" Adam asked when a waiter came over and placed the menus on their table.
"Caesar salad, caramelized butter prawns, and a pink lemonade. What about you, Mas?" Natasha asked as she handed the menu back to Adam.
"I'll have the grilled ribs and a mojito mocktail. That's all for now. If we want anything else, we'll order later," Adam told the waiter, who promptly noted down their order.
"Let me repeat the order, sir and ma'am. One Caesar salad, one caramelized butter prawns, one grilled ribs, one pink lemonade, and one mojito mocktail."
"That's right," Adam replied briefly.
"All right. Please wait for your food. Excuse me."
"What's wrong, sweetheart? You seem really serious. You even asked me to meet you for lunch like this. That's not like you. Usually, if there's something you want to talk about, you don't make an appointment like this," Adam said, reaching across the table to take Natasha's hand.
Natasha remained silent.
Her expression was calm, but there was an invisible spark in her clear eyes. Somehow, that look made Adam's heartbeat quicken.
"Sweetheart, is something wrong? Come on, tell me. Don't make me worry," Adam said, tightening his grip around her hand.
"Mas, can I ask you something?" Natasha asked softly.
There was no smile on her face. She looked as though she were struggling to contain her emotions.
"Of course, sweetheart. You can ask me anything. If I can answer it, I will. What do you want to ask?" Adam replied, his voice slightly unsteady.
"I have a lot of questions for you. Are you really okay with me asking them?"
Natasha paused for a moment.
Her expression remained serious. The sweet smile that usually brightened her face was nowhere to be seen.
"Why does this feel so serious? You're making me nervous. What do you want to ask? Did I do something wrong?" Adam asked, trying to lighten the mood with a wide smile.
"No. You haven't done anything wrong. Or, more accurately, you haven't done anything wrong yet," Natasha replied mysteriously.
Her answer made Adam's heart beat even faster.
Fear and anxiety slowly began to settle over him.
"My first question is..." Natasha paused, looking directly into Adam's eyes.
"What do I mean to you?"
She clasped her hands together on the table.
"Before you answer, please think carefully about your answer. Because your answer will determine what I ask you next."
***