"Lady Tsunade!" called Shizune, poking her head through the doorway. "Team Yamato has arrived, and they're ready for their debriefing!"
"Bring them in," Tsunade replied, yawning.
Shizune withdrew her head from the doorway, and Tsunade leaned forwards onto her desk, resting her head on her folded arms as she listened to her attendant's footsteps tottering away down the corridor to fetch Team Yamato.
"This job is going to be the death of me," Tsunade muttered to herself. "I didn't get a wink of sleep all night. The sun's already coming up, and I'm still not done with yesterday's paperwork…"
Tsunade's gaze drifted longingly towards the unopened bottle of rice wine sitting temptingly before her— a bribe from some important merchant who wanted extra guards assigned to his caravan company that traded with the Land of Wind. Greedy bastard wanted more than the Hidden Leaf was contractually obliged to provide, what with tensions rising along the border. What was his name again? Something to do with pastries… Keki? Croissant? Brioche? Éclair?
No… it was Gatō, wasn't it? Tarutsu, the son of that shipping magnate…
"Tomorrow too!? That ancient bag of bones doesn't know when to quit!" Tsunade grumbled, glancing at the upcoming day's timetable to find that Mitokado Homura had scheduled yet another early‑morning meeting with her. "If this is about lifting that old fox Danzō's wanted status, he can forget it! And don't think for a moment I haven't noticed your old friend Koharu sneaking out of the village against orders— with a squad of ANBU in tow, no less!"
Perhaps it was time to lift martial law. The village's finances had been in the red throughout February, and complaints were mounting that the extended partial lockdown was hurting trade. It hardly made sense to maintain heightened security long after Hiruko's defeat and the withdrawal of the invading armies. Even the Akatsuki had kept a low profile in recent months, following their brief flare of activity last December…
"Come in," Tsunade said distractedly, hearing a knock at the door.
Yamato, Sakura, Karin, and Tenten stepped into the room and stood smartly at attention, all pretending not to notice as Tsunade hastily shoved her precious bottle of wine beneath the desk. Coughing in embarrassment, she re‑emerged with a stack of blank mission report forms for them to fill in.
"Report," she said, sliding the sheets across her desk.
"Ahem," Captain Yamato coughed. "The mission was a success. The Fourth Hokage's seal was untouched. We weren't detected, and everything went smoothly."
Sakura's face twitched.
"What's wrong with her?" Tsunade demanded, immediately catching her disciple's strange expression. To her, Sakura looked as though she were caught halfway between a sneeze and a bout of constipation. "She looks like she's in pain."
"There was a small incident with the— ah— architecture of the site in question," Captain Yamato said begrudgingly. "Sakura may have sprained something in the fall."
"My shoulders are sore," Sakura groaned. Using the Super Expansion Jutsu without any practice, on top of combining the Body Revival Jutsu with Chakra Enhanced Strength, had pushed her body well past its limits. Her bones were teeming with hairlines fractures, and her muscles and ligaments were killing her. "Actually, scratch that. I think I'm dying. Please help."
That was all the excuse Tsunade needed to skive off work.
"Well, I think you all deserve a reward for working so diligently," she said, rising abruptly to her feet. "Come along, girls, we're heading to the hot springs. My treat."
Captain Yamato pointed to himself hopefully, but Tsunade swept past him without a second glance, with Sakura, Tenten, and Karin trailing after her like ducklings.
"Aww…" Yamato sighed, shoulders drooping. "I just know that if it'd been Kakashi, he would have been invited too…"
If only he'd known that Tsunade would invite Kakashi to join them on the way, he might have cried a little inside.
…
And so, on the morning of the first of March, Tsunade, Sakura, Tenten, Karin— and, for some reason, Ino— found themselves gathered in a circle in the hot springs, up to their chests in hot water. Sakura reached to give a teasing a pinch at Ino's suspiciously chubby midriff, but the other girl angrily slapped her hand away.
The Konoha Hot Springs were, as ever, filled with old ladies.
As Sakura had discovered to her dismay upon first transmigrating, the early hours of the morning belonged entirely to the old and the wrinkled. Morning baths were hardly common for most people— unless they'd been working through the night— but, to Sakura's misfortune, the elderly and retired suffered no such limits. They could bathe whenever they well pleased!
"Hyuu!" Tsunade exclaimed, squirming with pleasure as she downed a shot of rice wine. "A hot bath and a cup of sake in the morning— now that hits the spot!"
Tsunade reached for the tray floating in the bathwater before her, which was slowly drifting away as though trying to escape. She poured herself another shot straight from the bottle— and down the hatch it went.
"Please, allow me, Milady," said Ino obsequiously. "Let me pour you another cup!"
"Mhm," Tsunade sighed. "Good girl."
Sakura gave Ino a puzzled look. What was that pig wearing human skin doing here? She hadn't even been part of the mission, so why was she being rewarded with a bath alongside Lady Tsunade? It wasn't fair, damn it!
"Ngh, I'm so jealous! That should be me!" Tenten muttered through gritted teeth, gnawing at her thumbnail. "Lady Tsunade is my idol! How come I'm the only one who doesn't have any talent with medical ninjutsu, it's not fair…!"
Meanwhile, Karin was busy rubbing up against Sakura's back, kneading warm yang chakra into her aching shoulders. Sakura had pushed herself a little too hard in the battle against Anrokuzan— she'd definitely pulled a muscle or two... or all of them. She hadn't felt the pain at first, dulled as it was by adrenaline, but now it was taking every ounce of her willpower not to scream. It felt like her muscles were trying to crawl out of her skin!
"No wonder you're always saying your back hurts," Ino commented dryly, eyeing Sakura's breasts bobbing up and down in the water. Unlike Tsunade, she had undone her Transformation Jutsu for the bath, revealing her full 136 cm bustline in all of its glory. "Those things are positively monstrous. They're actually floating."
"They're a handful, all right," Sakura admitted, slapping the top of her chest lightly. "So, come over here, Ino, it's about time I lightened the load a bit... I think I might be able to do it now."
Ino goggled at her. In all honesty, she'd begun to lose hope that she'd ever get her breasts back. Hesitantly, she waded through the water and settled in front of Sakura, suddenly feeling very self-conscious about her flattened state.
At last, the moment had come…! But just as Sakura's fingers were about to brush Ino's chest…
"Chidori!"
…the sound of a thousand chirping birds rang out, and, outraged, Tsunade surged to her full height out of the water, giving Sakura an unexpected, full‑frontal view of her nethers.
"Shaved…" Sakura said dizzily.
Karin's nails dug painfully into Sakura's shoulders. "Onee-sama," she said frostily. "Your nose is bleeding. You're dripping blood into the bath."
"Damn it, Jiraiya, you nasty old perv!" Tsunade hollered at the top of her lungs. "I knew posting Kakashi in front of the baths was the right move! Just wait until I get my hands on you!"
"Eh?" Sakura said, wiping her bloody nose. "Then, Naruto's back from training on Mt Myōboku already? It's only been a few days!"
Though from her perspective, it had been more than a week!
"Not quite," Tsunade replied, sinking back into the water with a grunt. "Jiraiya's been popping back into the village every other day to fetch some takeaway for himself. Apparently, the food they make on Mount Myōboku isn't very palatable to humans."
Sakura shivered. Of all the things that set her on edge, toads ranked just below insects… an unfortunate legacy from her body's former owner. Thankfully, Naruto didn't call them up too often. Talking toads were all kinds of freaky!