Chapter 190
- Duke -
My temper got the best of me as I slammed my fist into the wall.
The plaster still cracked under the impact. I held back, not wanting to bring down the whole wall.
"Duke, are you okay?" Kaysi's voice was careful.
I looked over at her. There was something in her eyes—pity… concern… maybe both.
"What did he mean by what you taught him?" She spoke softly with hesitation. I could tell she didn't want to pry.
I crossed my arms and leaned against the wall.
I let out a sigh. "Evan learned the behavior from me, but I never specifically taught him or told him to act this way. Both the Hoshi brothers are stubborn and have hot tempers."
Kaysi tilted her head slightly.
"What did he mean…?" she asked hesitantly. "About what you taught him?"
I crossed my arms and leaned back against the wall, exhaling slowly.
"When Evan was growing up, I told him some of my stories before becoming a guardian angel in the hope for him so that he could see some of my struggles and lessons."
The truth wasn't simple, and it wasn't clean.
"I crossed a line," I admitted. "I started seeing him as a son… not a charge. Not a cadet."
I closed my eyes for a brief moment. Memories don't fade when you're like me. They don't soften; they stay sharp.
"When I was human, when I was serving in the military, I didn't get much time away... And one day I regretted it."
My voice lowered without me meaning to.
"Missions stacked on mission. From deployment to deployment, I lived away from my family and home. I told myself it was to protect the people...I was doing something that mattered."
"But there's always a cost."
I looked down at my hands.
"These hands…" I muttered. "They've taken lives. And when it mattered most…"
A faint, bitter breath escaped me
"They couldn't hold on to the ones I loved."
"I had a wife and son..." I continued.
Kayi's eyes softened immediately.
"They were my world." I paused just for a second. "And I wasn't there when they needed me."
Kaysi remained silent, listening.
"One day... I got leave, just a small break to return home before the next mission. We planned a trip with just the three of us. My jaw tightened slightly. "A regular, normal day. A day meant to be filled with anything besides the war."
For a second, I wasn't in a hospital anymore. I could see that day clearly playing in my mind.
"I remember the day, and that sky was almost clear, with only a few clouds in sight. It was peaceful; it was calm. Too calm."
My fingers curled slightly.
"As we walked down the downtown markets, living it up on the town. Going door-to-door, window shopping, and just enjoying life with my family. The demons came."
Kaysi's breath hitched.
"A surge. Right in the middle of town. Something definitely unnatural..."
My voice stayed steady—but only because I forced it to.
"I did what I always had... I fought."
Gunfire.
Screams.
Blood.
"I told my wife to go ahead and take our son, who was 7, home."
I swallowed hard.
"I told them I would catch up after I protected everyone else first. We were on the outskirts, and our home was not far from here..."
A long silence.
"I was wrong to think they would be safe."
Kaysi didn't flinch, didn't blink.
"I fought my way through the crowds and the demons. When the last demon in the downtown plaza dropped, I went back home. I had been injured pretty badly, but nothing I could stitch back up."
My voice dropped, looking back on that day.
"I took the path back home. the same path we always took. As I took that last corner to our home, I spotted a small trail of blood. It was just enough blood for someone to keep moving."
I paused, remembering it too well.
"As I rounded the last tree line..." I exhaled slowly. My wife was still there. She didn't die instantly."
The words came out slowly. Quieter now.
"My son was nowhere to be found, and the demon had her by the throat just as she screamed for me."
"I killed that demon with my bare hands, tearing into his chest and pulling out his heart. It beat in my hand for a second as I showed it to him before I threw it to the ground."
I had no pride or fight after that.
"I barely made it to my wife as I collapsed by her side.
My eyes looked past the room, past the silence.
"She was the last thing I saw before being called."
Kaysi whispered.
"Heaven...?"
I nodded once.
"God gave me a choice when I got up there. Did I want to stay and serve my mission as a man or as a guardian angel, training the waymakers that were gifted the power to destroy the demons?"
A faint breath left my lips as I asked.
"My Family?"
"God replied, letting me know they were here and safe now."
"I chose to leave and return as an angel."
"But why?"
Kaysi's expression changed; it broke just a little.
"Because I had a job that wasn't finished yet."
Simple. true but brutal.
"He sent me back to keep fighting until he called all his saints home."
I flexed slightly, tapping on my watch.
"He let you keep it?" Kaysi asked.
The watch was a gift from my wife, and it stopped at the same time my life did—at 10:54.
"And your guns?"
"I can form my weapons into whatever I choose, and those were my guns of choice in the war. He normally allows material items in heaven, but as guardian weapons, he anointed them so they could stay with me. The scars you see on my face and others all over my body were from the last attacks of the demon that killed my family. I asked to keep them along with my memories so I could keep track of my mission."
"Your memories?"
I nodded.
"When you go to heaven, you have the choice to wipe your memories and start fresh, remembering only your divine calling. Without them, I don't think I would be the same person."
"Also, forgetting would be too easy, and I don't think I deserve it the easy way."
"I see..." I could tell that was hard for her to swallow.
I hopped off the wall.
"I remember every second, every wrong choice. Because that is what drives me."
I took a breath.
"That's what Evan..." I stopped myself for a second. "...What he is now."
Kaysi's eyes widened.
"When I was appointed to him, I was supposed to remain hidden until his time came."
A faint smirk pulled at my mouth.
"That didn't last."
"Of course not..." She smiled a bit. "That's not you."
"He was 7, the same age as my son," I continued. "Already a handful getting into trouble. Already to fight things he shouldn't have to."
"Rosa was barely holding things together when her sister passed."
"I saw it all over again..."
"What?" She questioned me.
"A kid growing up all alone again. And maybe even getting hurt in such a way, he would no longer be in this world."
Silence.
"So I stepped in," I exhaled in defeat. "But not as a guardian..."
"...Like a father figure," Kaysi finished softly.
She knew it was obvious.
"I trained him early," I continued. "Push him away. A child shouldn't have had to endure."
My jaw tightened again.
"I told him stories about sacrifice. About duty. About putting others first, as I did."
I shook my head.
"He listened too well... Kids are very impressionable, even when you don't mean for them to be or want them to be."
Kaysi's voice dropped.
"Yeah, that can be a problem."
I looked toward the door Evan had stormed through.
"He doesn't just believe it," I said. "He lives it."
Another pause
"He'll burn himself out trying to save everyone. And he will do it alone because he thinks that is what's best."
Kaysi's chest rose slowly as the weight settled in.
"And you're afraid…" she said quietly, "… he'll end up like you."
I didn't hesitate with what I said next.
"Worse."
A beat.
Kaysi looked down… then back up.
Her eyes are different now.
Not confused or uncertain.
"He isn't alone," she said.
I studied her for a second.
"Good, he's going to need that. Even when he is pushing you all away."
Outside, sirens echoed faintly through the city again.
We weren't done.
Not even close.
I pushed off the wall again.
"I think you can help him more than anyone else," I said.
She blinked.
"Why me?"
I looked toward the hallway again.
"Because he would burn the world for you… without thinking twice."
A pause.
"And that's exactly why he needs someone who won't let him."
Kaysi didn't answer.
But she understood.
I could see it.
I turned toward the door.
"There's still an enemy out there," I said.
"And this…"
I glanced back once.
"…this was just the beginning."