A week had passed since I'd teetered on the brink of a thrilling, heart-pounding interview with the Golden Duke and barely managed to salvage the situation. Up until about three days ago, I'd been having nightmares where Third Section Chief exploded spectacularly and the Golden Duke inevitably came to the Inspection Department.
In those dreams, that smiling face would thrash my very soul with eloquence I was utterly defenseless against, and I'd wake up belatedly slamming my desk, thinking, 'I should have countered like this!' I don't know how many times I did that. The oddly detailed nature of it all made it even more infuriating. Was someone controlling my dreams? How did I have the same nightmare four nights in a row?
"You slept well enough to dream?"
"Four nights in a row...?"
"You... slept...?"
"The Inspection Department's working conditions have truly hit rock bottom..."
What's with that last one? What were you doing for a week that you didn't sleep at all?
"The Director dumped all the night shifts on me, so I missed my date. I've been pulling all-nighters to catch up lately."
"Wouldn't keeping you from going home be doing the young ladies of the Imperial Capital a favor?"
Vicious bastard. So guys who have it made can still date even in this environment. At Second Section Chief's area-of-effect provocation toward singles, Third Section Chief looked at him with sorrowful eyes. That guy had been a textbook case of someone who'd never make it until he miraculously got married.
Of course, I'm the same. Third Section Chief and I accidentally made eye contact and briefly exchanged a moment of comradely solidarity before looking away. This is the kind of solidarity I don't want to get used to.
Watching this scene unfold, First Section Chief scratched her head and spoke up.
"Director, I have something to tell you."
"Hm? Didn't First Section finish all their reports?"
"Yes, this isn't about the report. I have something to pass along."
"What is it?"
"The Minister was looking for you. He said to come see him after the meeting ends."
My body stiffened at the mention of the Minister, then relaxed again. The fact that he'd given me a grace period of 'after the meeting ends' meant this probably wasn't another incident involving flying inkwells and shouting.
I felt pathetic for instinctively shrinking the moment I heard the word 'Minister.' I don't have many superiors, but every single one of those few superiors is no ordinary person. Wouldn't it be better for my mental health to have ten ordinary superiors instead?
"Why does that old man use people as messengers when there are perfectly good communication tools? He did the same thing last time with the Deputy Director."
...
At that, the First Section Chief's red pupils stared at me wordlessly. As if to say, 'You really don't know why you're asking?' What, what the hell, what.
"Director. They say the Minister doesn't answer calls well, right? I heard him complaining that he has to call ten times just to get three or four answers."
"Well, when someone's doing important work, they might miss a few calls."
A civil servant might unavoidably miss calls while handling important matters. The Inspection Department isn't some rural guard post branch—it's one of the Empire's core departments. If the Director answered every single call, wouldn't that actually be evidence of idleness and negligence? If a subordinate Director is diligently working, the Minister should be pleased instead.
The Second Section Chief burst out laughing at my shameless response. It was as if he was saying, 'That's exactly why you're a regular at the Minister's office.'
"If I were the Minister, I would've stuck a pen in your head ages ago."
"No wonder he strikes down at me every time I see him."
One of the mysteries that had been puzzling me was finally solved. Ah, so that's why...
"Ahem... Anyway, shouldn't you be going now? He's not calling you because he's angry, but if you're late, you'll see an angry Minister, won't you?"
"I see that all the time, so it doesn't really matter."
Despite saying that, I quietly rose from my seat. The fact that I see it all the time makes me want to see it even less. Every time, he gets angry with new and different patterns, which drives the recipient crazy. My pupils grew distant for a moment.
"If you keep acting like that, I'll nominate you as the next Minister when I retire!"
That roar from a year ago still hasn't faded from memory. To touch upon what a person fears most... that's too cruel...
"Anyway, there's nothing more to discuss, so dismissed."
"Yes~"
"Return safely."
- Knock knock
"Your Excellency, it's me. The Inspection Department Director."
"Come in."
I seriously considered closing the door right after opening it. The Minister, holding dumbbells in both hands and flexing his muscles while pumping iron, filled my vision. Ugh, my eyes.
"...What are you doing?"
"Did you already develop presbyopia at your age, young man? I'm working out."
No, I'm not asking because I don't know you're working out. What kind of minister pumps iron in his office during work hours?
"Ah, yes, I understand."
Of course, with said minister right in front of me, I couldn't bring myself to say it out loud.
'Better he's in workout mode than rage mode...'
If he were enraged, those iron-pumping muscles would come flying at me—how could I possibly withstand that? A small wish arose that he'd just keep training alone for days on end.
The Minister, who had been watching me enter cautiously, tossed the dumbbell into a corner. With a heavy thud, the entire floor shook violently for a moment. Crazy... This crazy bastard...
"Why so startled? Can't you even lift that much?"
"What? Why would you think I could?"
The Minister, his body equipped with muscles that flaunted their presence as if begging to be noticed, walked toward me. He looked like a giant bear rising on two legs and approaching.
At that awe-inspiring sight, I nearly dropped to my knees and begged for forgiveness. I didn't know what I'd done wrong, but I was sorry anyway... The Minister, who had somehow gotten close, frowned and smacked me on the back.
"Ack!"
"You little shit, now that I look at you, why are you so scrawny? You've been holed up in your office and lost all your muscle."
"No, I've never heard anyone say that to me before...!"
In your eyes, who wouldn't look scrawny!
When I protested like I was having a fit from the pain radiating through my back, the Minister didn't even pretend to listen and instead just sneered.
"Of course you haven't heard it—you never go outside."
"Damn it, I'm even more pissed because you're right."
"Enough. Sit down. I called you because I have something to discuss."
The Minister turned away without mercy and took his seat at the head of the table, leaving me no choice but to swallow my protests and sit down as well.
'Why does it feel like he's gotten even bigger in just a few weeks?'
A quick scan from top to bottom confirmed it—his muscles had definitely grown more pronounced since last time. Muscles with infinite growth potential? Who the hell unleashed such an insane creature into the world? How is that even remotely human? He's more like a half-ogre at this point. One thing's for certain: he's not the kind of talent who should be staying as Minister of Finance.
Every time we hold the Ministry of Finance New Employee Welcome Ceremony, the way the new recruits' pupils shake like crazy when they see the Minister is proof that this isn't just my personal opinion—it's everyone's opinion. Even being generous, he should be Minister of War or a Marshal at the very least. He's too big a person to be contained in the vessel of Minister of Finance. In multiple senses.
"What are you thinking about?"
"Just... that you're impressive, sir."
If I told people I work under someone like that, what would they think of me? Would they mistake us for a gang instead of the Inspection Department?
At my vague compliment about how impressive he was, the Minister showed no interest and simply leaned back in his chair, stroking his chin. Wow, now even the chair looks small.
"You don't have any assignments right now, do you?"
"Well, that's right. If I were handling something, it would be work Your Excellency assigned me, so you'd know about it, wouldn't you?"
There were plenty of reports coming up from each division and matters to handle, but nothing that required the Director to personally take charge. I'd nearly been sent to the field at Director rank over the Golden Duke matter, but fortunately Division 3 wrapped it up.
"Hmmmm..."
"Why are you doing that? Don't tell me you're about to dump something on me? But there isn't anything for you or me to handle these days, is there?"
"There isn't. There wasn't."
"Why does it end with 'wasn't'? That's unsettling."
Which means there is something now. I instinctively frowned, seeing a future where I'd get beaten down by work. But whether I showed an insubordinate expression right to his face or not, the Minister didn't care.
'What is it? Is it really serious?'
This wasn't a Minister who would stay quiet when I openly showed my displeasure. It wouldn't be strange for a roar and a fist to fly at me immediately, yet he was keeping silent. They say no news is the scariest news, and this definitely didn't seem like an ordinary matter. Damn it, it's only been a week since we cleaned up the Golden Duke incident—has something else blown up already?
***
Meanwhile, just as Karl was troubled, the Minister was also troubled. A matter requiring attention had arisen, but it was a bit too big for a Director-level person to handle, yet too small for him to go personally. Of course, he could force a Director to go and they'd somehow manage it, but if things went wrong, a situation might arise where the Minister would have to rush over himself.
The problem was that even the Minister couldn't move freely these days. If it were possible, he would have moved without such deliberation long ago.
'I suppose I'll have to entrust it to this bastard after all.'
On the organizational chart, Karl was just one of the Ministry of Finance's Directors. However, considering the Inspection Department's status and Karl's personal standing, he couldn't be thought of as a mere Director-level official. While he wasn't quite on par with the Minister, he was certainly above the other Directors.
"Hey."
"Yes?"
"You said you wanted to go to the Academy, didn't you?"
At those words, Karl's twisted expression smoothed out.
***
My eyes widened at the Minister's words, and life began to flow back into my body. Yes, I had said that quite often. I'd said until my mouth went dry that I wanted to enjoy a modest Academy life instead of this shitty civil servant existence. Each time, it was routine to get smacked on the back of the head by the Minister telling me to stop spouting nonsense.
'Could it be? Is this retirement? Am I retiring?'
If so, it made sense why the Minister had been so troubled. Of course he'd agonize until the very last moment about releasing a high-grade talent like me. But despite that, the Minister had decided to accept my resignation.
Actually, I had faith in the Minister. I believed without doubt that beneath that burly frame and fierce manner of speech lay a thoughtful and considerate heart. That's why he hadn't turned away from his subordinate's pitiful pleas and ultimately accepted them, hadn't he? Though we'd only spent about four years together, those four years had been more meaningful than forty years. Oh yes, indeed. Absolutely.
"Minister, Your Excellency! I've deeply respected Your Excellency from the bottom of my heart since long ago!"
At those words, the Minister looked at me with an expression that said, 'This bastard's having another fit.' But I didn't care. In my heart, the Minister had already ascended to the position of a hero who had granted my life's greatest wish.
"Though it's regrettable that I must leave Your Excellency's side to live as a mere Academy student, I will never forget these four years that felt like forty years spent with Your Excellency. From the moment I first met Your Excellency, my time flowed differently from others. That's why these weren't just four years, but four years that felt like four hundred years..."
The Minister, watching with a bored expression, let the retirement declaration flow in one ear and out the other as he handed me the documents he'd prepared.
"Stop spouting nonsense and just read this."
"—That's why these four years that felt like four thousand years with Your Excellency... What's this? Severance pay documents?"
Only then did I stop my Ninety-Five Theses of Resignation and take the documents the Minister offered. Normally, I would have recoiled in horror and handled them like radioactive waste, but in my heart, the Minister had already ascended to the position of a deity reigning over the world's order.
"...Huh?"
And then a single sentence caught my eye, causing that divine position to begin violently shaking.
[...Karl Krasius, Inspection Department Director of the Ministry of Finance, is hereby dispatched to the Imperial Academy as Emergency Inspector. - Minister of Finance of the Kfellophen Empire, Count Deber Briard of Blochen]
My trembling pupils turned toward the Minister.
The Minister calmly nodded his head.
"You wanted to go to the Academy, didn't you? I went out of my way to arrange it."
"You crazy bastard! I wanted to enroll in the Academy, not—what kind of lunatic wants to go there to work!"
But the order had already been written. The Minister of Finance, who governed the Ministry under the Emperor's authority, had issued the directive himself. To refuse without legitimate cause would be a challenge to the Emperor, a challenge to the Empire itself.
When told to do something, you do it. If you don't like it, transfer to another department. The karma I'd regularly inflicted upon my section chiefs had now come back to haunt me. Though admittedly, I'd learned all that karma from the Minister in the first place. In the end, having lost on every front, I had no choice but to leave the Minister's office powerlessly clutching what amounted to a slave certificate disguised as an order.
"What a son of a bitch..."
The Minister's position had been revised from deity to son of a bitch.