It wasn't a smooth evening for them in the Great Hall. Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw students kept sneaking over to the Gryffindor table to pester Cohen about the news of Azkaban.
"That's right, that's what's happening," Cohen replied, giving everyone the same answer.
"How do you know?" Zacharias Smith from Hufflepuff asked suspiciously. "I mean, if the Ministry of Magic is trying to cover it up, how could a young wizard like you find out about it before the Daily Prophet?"
"He's right," another Ravenclaw student who had sneaked over chimed in.
"You all know the Ministry wants to keep this a secret, so you expect me to reveal how I got the information?" Cohen raised an eyebrow. "Just wait a few days; the news will get out on its own. What's the rush?"
A disappointed groan went through the students who hadn't managed to get any more information from Cohen, and they slunk back to their own house tables before Professor McGonagall arrived.
"Could Umbridge have sent them to trick you?" Hermione frowned after they left. "She's definitely looking for a reason to punish you for breaking the rules... She said after class today that if we heard anyone spreading such rumors, we should report it to her."
"The great scholars will argue on my behalf," Cohen said calmly. "Besides, I'm starting to think the path of becoming Minister of Magic through studying might not work out—because the more I look at those political wizards, the less I like them, let alone the thought of learning to play their games."
"Of course, you can't just become Minister of Magic by studying," Hermione said definitively. "People who follow the rules can't make it to the top. I've learned that from my reading; the election for Minister is very complex—"
"Be careful," Cohen warned. "Don't ruin my chances of writing a memoir."
"But that's so far off, we still have more than two years until we graduate," Hermione waved him off. "Your and Harry's immediate problem is figuring out how to survive her detentions..."
"Cohen says he has a plan," Harry said, full of trust. "And I'm actually glad they've stopped whispering about me being a liar—oh, Cohen, I didn't mean I hoped you..."
"It's fine," Cohen said. "Instead of worrying about me holding a grudge, you should worry about your homework. Hermione said she's not letting us copy anymore."
"Just for the sake of you two having to deal with that woman's detentions," Hermione said, chin held high.
---
After dinner, they returned to the common room.
Most of the other Gryffindor students hadn't finished eating because they were still gossiping. This is how rumors get started: when Cohen, the source of the gossip, refused to reveal more, the gossipers began to invent all sorts of things that didn't exist.
For example, they'd say Cohen's "Azkaban relative" had given him some inside information, or that Cohen had heard the news from a Dementor because he was actually a Dementor in human form, and that's why the Goblet of Fire had named him the Azkaban champion. These absurd rumors are always popular with students, who are happy to send letters with the latest school gossip to their families.
Hogwarts is a giant rumor mill because almost all magical children in Britain go to school there.
The next day, the small, unregulated wizarding newspapers would explode with the news, and even if the Ministry of Magic locked down the area around Azkaban, they wouldn't be able to stop it.
But for now, this had nothing to do with Cohen and his friends, who still had homework to do.
"Let's do Snape's essay first."
Ron spread a piece of parchment on the table, dipped his quill in ink, and wrote a title:
"The properties of… Moonstone… and its uses… in potion-making… There! Done!"
After writing the title, Ron looked up at Hermione, full of hope.
Cohen and Harry were in a similar situation. Cohen was too lazy to open a textbook and only knew that moonstone could be used in some potions and alchemy experiments, but he didn't know its fancy properties. If they didn't follow the official sources, Snape would definitely find a way to give the Gryffindors low marks.
But Hermione wasn't writing; she was thinking about other things.
"What are the properties of moonstone and its uses in potion-making?" Ron tried to prompt Hermione.
"That's not it... We have to find a way..." Hermione muttered, not listening to Ron at all.
"I don't think 'finding a way' is one of its uses..." Ron blinked.
"Stop it, Ron," Hermione said impatiently. "I just realized something terrifying—if she doesn't teach us any real spells all year, our O.W.L.s are going to be a complete disaster—"
"I know about moonstone; followers of Selene can use it to make wands and such," Cohen said casually.
Since Hermione wasn't writing the answers, Cohen had decided to go through his pile of spell books to prepare for tomorrow's "detention."
"This isn't one of those games Mr. Norton plays, Cohen..." Harry said, a bit helpless. He had been roped into playing a few times during summer vacation at Cohen's house and had heard the name Selene—she was a goddess in a game.
"Honestly, we've never really had a stable Defence Against the Dark Arts education, have we?" Ron said, taking it in stride. "Everyone's the same. We can't all just—"
"An O.W.L. is a pass-or-fail exam, Ron," Hermione said. "Even if everyone's grades are terrible, it won't let the not-so-terrible person pass."
Ron's face was a blank slate.
"And we can't make Dumbledore get a new teacher either..." Ron said.
Hermione was lost in thought for a moment before she suddenly looked at Cohen and Harry, her eyes lighting up with surprise.
"I have a bad feeling about this. I'm going to bed," Cohen said, getting up immediately.
"You can't leave, Cohen," Hermione said in a very excited voice. "Didn't Harry learn spells from the Chimera in your trunk last year?"
"Yeah, I think so..." Harry said. "Cohen's Chimera knows everything—are you saying we should have it teach us Defence Against the Dark Arts?"
"Phew... I thought you were going to ask me to teach you Defence Against the Dark Arts," Cohen said, relieved. "Don't be ridiculous; I can't teach you to defend against me. The Chimera's fine, though; you can give the goat something to do."
"That's the general idea," Hermione said, ignoring the last part of Cohen's comment. "If it's just the three of us studying, it's fine—but we should think about the other students, too..."
"We can't let them know that the Chimera is Cohen's, can we?" Harry said, worried. "But what if we could make it look like it just wandered out of the Forbidden Forest again...?"
"So many students rushing into a restricted area would definitely get caught," Hermione said. "The best way is for us to learn from the Chimera and then teach everyone else..."
"Sounds like we're all going to turn into you," Ron said, stroking his chin. "But what are the properties of moonstone and its uses in potion-making?"
"Alright, alright..." Hermione pursed her lips. "If I don't write it down, you're just going to keep repeating that, aren't you? Fine, I'll think about this later. Let's just do the homework."