After several days of sailing, the ship carrying Sakura Haruno finally reached the Land of Tea. The journey had been quiet, with nothing eventful happening, not even a significant storm.
To be cautious, Sakura didn't have the boatmen dock at the port. Instead, she found a deserted beach. Then, she and Terumi Mei jumped off the ship and, treading water, made their way ashore.
However, a small shadow still followed behind them: Isaribi, in her fish-human form, swam after them in the sea.
As for the ship, Sakura let the boatmen sail away. After this lesson, she believed they would behave themselves from now on.
"Take this money. Here's a letter I wrote. Go to Ise Castle, find Lord Chino, and give this letter to him. He will arrange things for you," Sakura said, handing Isaribi a bag of money and an envelope.
During their days on the ship, Sakura had suddenly remembered her good relationship with the lord of Ise Castle in the Land of Tea. Sending Isaribi there might not be a bad idea.
Isaribi was likely following her because she had witnessed Sakura easily subdue the doctor who had persecuted her, and thus had placed all her hopes on Sakura. For someone desperately clinging to a lifeline, she wouldn't let go easily.
Even after Sakura had displayed such violent behavior, Isaribi didn't want to give up, because Isaribi believed only Sakura could make Doctor Tenchi develop the reverse-engineering process for her.
Looking at what Sakura handed her, Isaribi said hesitantly, "C-can I ask you for one thing?"
"No," Sakura stated bluntly. "Honestly, I don't even know you. We just happened to meet. Your past is tragic, but I've already provided you with sufficient security. I have some connection with Lord Chino; if you go to him, things will at least be better than before."
"I... I know, but... only you can help me. Please, you... you're my last hope," Isaribi said, her face pale, tears streaming down as she spoke.
Looking at Isaribi's pitiful expression, Sakura felt a wave of irritation rise inexplicably. This had nothing to do with her, yet she was being burdened with it.
She dropped the envelope and money bag, grabbed Mei, and walked away. Whatever happens, happens. The recent events had worn Sakura's patience thin. Did they really think she was some great saint?
Isaribi watched the two figures gradually disappear, her heart sinking to the depths. Without shedding a tear, she picked up the money bag and envelope from the ground and walked towards the nearest town.
As Sakura walked through the forests of the Land of Tea, thinking about what had just happened, a surge of dark resentment involuntarily rose within her. Her pace gradually quickened.
It wasn't until she heard Terumi Mei beside her call out, "Wait for me! I... I can't keep up with you," that Sakura was startled back to her senses.
Sakura instantly stopped, standing in place with a thoughtful expression on her face.
Ever since that rampage a few days ago, Sakura had felt that something was off about herself. It seemed her control over her emotions was getting weaker and weaker, although nothing similar had happened since the rampage.
But she vaguely sensed that she was becoming more extreme, more indifferent to life.
When did it start...? Right, after the fight with Terumi Mei, I started feeling this way. Yes, although my mindset had subtly changed, it hadn't caught my attention.
If the rampage hadn't occurred, perhaps she would never have realized the changes happening within her.
Thinking back now, the small town she had destroyed with one punch... the casualties must have been innumerable at the time, but afterwards, she had felt nothing.
That small town was full of civilians from the Land of Water; they had no connection to the ninja villages. They had lost their lives in a battle with Terumi Mei that was based on a misunderstanding.
Sakura was not a homicidal maniac; she didn't enjoy killing. She wouldn't indiscriminately kill civilians. In the past, accidentally killing a civilian would have made Sakura feel a trace of guilt, but on that day, she had turned a deaf ear to the wails around her.
It wasn't killing for pleasure, but rather that sense of indifference to life. Although she couldn't recall the feeling from the day of the rampage, the sensation of destroying that small town with one punch was still vivid in her mind.
Even now, Sakura felt no guilt whatsoever for those accidentally killed civilians. She reached this conclusion by logically comparing her actions before and after, not based on her current feelings.
Although those boatmen were guilty, their crimes didn't warrant death. Yet, with one punch from her, they had been directly turned to ash.
The strange thing was, although she had done it, it felt as if she were being controlled at the time. Thinking about it carefully now, the feeling during the rampage and the feeling after destroying the small town with one punch were strikingly similar.
"I..." Sakura looked at her hands, muttering to herself, "...am gradually losing my humanity..."
Humanity – the emotions evolved by advanced animals with the capacity for thought. Whether good or evil, it signifies the evolution from lower animals to higher animals.
It represents the shift from acting on instinct to moving beyond instinct, a burden of survival evolved from thought.
But without this burden, civilization would not arise. It is precisely because of such a burden that civilization is born.
And Sakura seemed to be gradually losing her humanity. Whether good or evil, Sakura felt not the slightest discomfort at having killed so many civilians, as if it were as natural as killing an ant.
Especially the time she destroyed the small town; the wails of those who had lost their homes and loved ones because of her caused no ripples in her heart.
Although the rampage was triggered by an inexplicable agitation, her mindset after regaining clarity was exactly the same as after destroying the small town.
If she didn't deliberately analyze it, Sakura would never have realized this problem. But... what exactly caused it?
Sakura sat down cross-legged, no longer in a hurry to travel. Being able to think about this problem now proved she hadn't fallen too deep. If she were to completely lose her humanity, she would probably think it was a matter of course and wouldn't even want to solve it.
If I lose my humanity, am I still myself? It is precisely because of this burden of humanity, this burden of survival, that I have the cognition of 'I am me.'
Heh, why do I always encounter such philosophical problems? A bitter smile tugged at Sakura's lips. She hadn't transmigrated as a philosopher; she just wanted to live a good life. But why did these things that negated her own existence keep happening to her...
"Hm? Aren't we going?" Terumi Mei asked, puzzled, seeing Sakura suddenly sit down cross-legged.
"Not for now," Sakura nodded. "There are some things I need to deal with."
Nothing happens without a reason. Sakura thought for a moment and suddenly realized that quite a few strange things had happened to her in the past year.
It seemed to have started after the mission on Red Shoal Island. Wait... Sakura suddenly had a jolt of realization, abruptly remembering that after returning from Red Shoal Island, she had slept for a very long time. When she woke up, her emotions seemed to have vanished from her, and her reactions to external stimuli were merely mechanical responses retrieved from her memory.
At that time, she had also had a very strange dream. In the dream, she had become nothingness, only consciousness without a physical form, drifting through high mountains and flowing water.
She hadn't thought much of it then. After waking up, that state of emotional absence hadn't lasted too long.
And then, she had experienced the same dream again, the same state, and it was even more severe than the first time; even her memories had been sealed.
That was the dream she must have had while unconscious after her mutually destructive fight with Hanzo, after being saved by Junko.
However, because she was injured at the time, she hadn't delved into it. But later, she encountered Ranke, had an encounter with the Ikarus civilization, was invaded by the Gelel Force, and was deprived of her emotions.
That's right. She had experienced that state of emotional deprivation even before being invaded by the Gelel Force. After waking up from those two strange dreams, she had been in a state of emotional deprivation.
And the Gelel Force itself, based on its use by Village Chief Soga from Red Shoal Island and by herself, was actually natural energy.
Sakura suddenly froze. If she followed this logic, her rampage and indifference to life were actually side effects of natural energy.
But if that were the case, she should have undergone a change when she was invaded by the Gelel Force. Yet, there had been no change at that time. As long as the Gelel Force was sealed in the Yin Seal, it wouldn't affect her.
But during the rampage, Sakura hadn't opened the Yin Seal, nor did she have any reason to. However, afterwards, she found that the Yin Seal had opened automatically. And because the natural energy in the Yin Seal had been used up all at once, it had left Sakura somewhat exhausted.
Thinking about it this way, it seemed to have nothing to do with natural energy again. But the series of phenomena since encountering Red Shoal Island and the Gelel Force seemed to have a common thread running through them all.
She could always find similarities, yet she could also find logic to overturn those similarities.
The feeling after those two dreams was the same as the state of being deprived of emotions by the Gelel Force, but it was also somewhat different. Being deprived of emotions by the Gelel Force could put her in an optimal combat state, but those two times, her whole being had been muddled.
And the state of indifference to life after the rampage and the destruction of the small town, although somewhat different from complete emotional deprivation, was an even more cruel deprivation of humanity.
The cause of all this seemed to point to Red Shoal Island and the origin of the Ikarus' Gelel Stone. Ikarus no longer had any Gelel Stones; the one in the village was the last one that could be obtained.
Sakura somewhat regretted changing her itinerary to go to the Land of Water back then. If she had gone to Red Shoal Island, she wouldn't have stirred up so many problems, and perhaps her current confusion would already have an answer.
But then again, if she hadn't encountered the events in the Land of Water, perhaps she wouldn't have discovered the changes in herself.
And if it weren't for the investigation results Master Tsunade had given about Junko, perhaps Sakura wouldn't have connected what was happening to her with Junko.
But now, Sakura felt that Junko seemed to be playing a role she didn't know about in what was happening to her – perhaps important, perhaps not.
Someone with no identity had saved her. Thinking about it now, there were indeed many suspicious points. She herself had judged her injuries at that time to be fatal.
But after only two days, she had mostly recovered. Even Master Tsunade would have found those kinds_of injuries troublesome, let alone Grandma Rika, who only knew a little about medicinal herbs.
This meant that something must have happened during the blank period when she was unconscious, and it was crucial.
That event might be related to her current situation, or it might not be. After all, the first dream had occurred before she was injured. But it definitely had something to do with how she recovered from her injuries, and perhaps also with Junko's origins.
All these things seemed connected, yet also seemed unconnected. Everything was so mystifying and complex.
Sakura had a premonition that this journey of hers would not be smooth.