After they had left I finally let out a sigh of relieve.
Conversation with High Priestess had cause me to go off rail from my original purpose.
But looking at it now, it doesn't seem like I need this whole detour in the first place.
There is nothing left to be remember here that worth while.
Beside, knowing the importants people and the emotional weight, I realise this place doesn't really carry any meaning for me.
Which now only mean one thing.
To face the final obstical I had to return to where it all begin for Mori.
*Couple of day passes.
The night here is as cold as I had remember. The howling of the gushing wind, follow by the smooth rustle of the grass, offer a sense of calm like no other.
That why I choose this place back then.
It is isolated, peaceful, and above all...quiet.
My foot take it first step inside the small town.
There is many new faces... I think.
Even thought I don't recall everyone... it nice in a way... to see glimpse of familarity.
Although, I don't expect them to remember who I am.
Entering the town, the place is still lively since the night barely had start.
'How long ago since I had left this place? Half an year? No, it probably closer to a year'
Despite that, I got to said it place doesn't change at all.
A couple of kids run passes me, full of smile and laughter chasing one another.
Caring nothing about the real world.
...
I don't recall my childhood being the same.
...
But who would cared about the comparision, that was in the distance past and now I am only looking at the recent past.
So, why had I come here.
To savour the moment perhaps. Afterall, I did throw away this possible life here, to chase after a curse lady.
Well, to be more percisely the choice did start here. i become Mori as soon as I made up my mind to chase after lady Arlen.
But why? The reason is probably the question I needed to answer.
I can't put the blame on my interest in curse alone. It couldn't be that easy.
Since I was really reluctane to have this mundane life before.
So why, what make me as easily throw it away?
My journey suppose to prepared me for this moment... and I learn a lot of what make me and Mori the same.
...
"If all of it true, then.."
I exhale a long sigh, knowing full well it meaning. And I struggle, really stuggle to finish my word, to finish my thought.
No, I cannot falter... Not now. Not any more.
Then, the real answer had been buried deep within me.
To put it in simple word, I been avoiding a certain emotion... no that is too broad.
It more toward a part of my original self, I been shutting it for so long that I had hardwire myself to work around it.
The bad part is the answer I seek lies within the part I had left behind.
Confronting it again isn't easy because I had reason to avoid it in the first place. But, this little journey of discovering who Mori is, turn out to also help me to face it again slowly.
Which bring me to the good part. I think the real answer came as the consequences of abandoning that part of myself, instead of what it is.
Which is a relieve in it own way.
Everything make sense now.
"And I thought I had to dug deeper the first time."
I said with an amusing grine. Honestly I want to laugh too but being in the middle of the town isn't exactly the best place.
So I want to go somewhere that is quiet.
And I think I know just the place.
The bandit hideout... Where I first saw miss Arlen.
Unless the bandit reoocupy it again, I doubt there would be a soul that would set foot on that place again.
So, off I went past the distance peak.
The burning ruin seem like it had been wash with the passage of time. And to no suprise, there is nobody here. I went deeper into the ruin, for most part the nature had reclaim it place.
I even spotted a few wild animal on the area.
It seems the curse effect didn't left a real lasting effect on the land. That is a good sign. Because a curse of that calibar can do exactly that.
Which mean, at the time Miss Arlen really stay truth to her persuit.
After a few more quiet walk I finally reach the place where I had hide that day.
I can recall it perfectly, and percisely what happend that day.
It mark my first time observing miss Arlen and her curse at work.
A sight that couldn't be forgotten. Frankly speaking, it would make sense why my intial reason for persuing miss Arlen would make sense.
Then, it really not.
It's a bit embarrasing to confess.
But it seems all the trouble I went throught to get close to her is really because I was seeking comfort.
Not interest, not secret obsession, not some grand planning but comfort.
I know it doesn't suit me, I can realise that much.
But somehow it really is the real answer to my reasoning to chase after her.
My dull face turn to a small smile, eventually a bigger crack appear and for the first time in a very long time I let out a resounding laughter
that seems to wrap up my journey quite niceless.
It turn out better that expected. For myself and for Mori, which is also just another me not someone else.
For the future... I think I stick to what I been doing, since this new answer still allign with my previous answer.
To reach Abyssal depth rank, to get closer to miss Arlen.
A comfort worth pursuing.