"Sometimes, it's just too much," he explained, really only thinking about it now as the words came flying out of his mouth. "I try to spend time with Ron and the others, but even that doesn't feel right - it's like I've forgotten how to relax. I've been so petrified I'll be sent back to the Dursleys that-"
All words stopped as Hermione hugged him tightly. After the shock wore off Harry put his arms around her too; she seemed just as tense as he was. Now that he knew what to do with his hands, Harry thought this might be something he could get used to. It actually seemed to help.
"These clothes aren't new, by the way," he confessed as he felt the tension in his shoulders unknit a bit. Still standing as they were, Harry couldn't see her face to see what she thought, so he just kept talking. "I need new ones but I keep putting it off. All my old clothes were ruined so I've gotten used to dressing like this."
"You do wear something similar at Hogwarts anyway," she said to his shoulder.
"Right," he said, glad she couldn't see the chagrined look on his face. "And as for me being a Harold-," Harry started uncertainly.
Now that he thought about it, he hadn't thought like a Harold in days, not since Dumbledore had tried to take him back to the Dursleys. Why had he been a Harold then and not a Harold now? The depressive answer came easily.
'Because ikkle Harry needed an adult to look after him,' he thought to himself. 'Big bad Dumbledore was too scary to stand up to on his own so he needed someone else to swoop in and do it for him. '
He had stood up to him though. It hadn't been easy, but Lichfield hadn't come swooping in to stop things like Harry had hoped he would, so he had to do it on his own. He guessed part of him thought it'd be easier to face the man he had started to see as a kindly old grandfather if it wasn't really him having to be the one to say those things.
It was mean old Harold who said those hurtful things, not Harry. Harry was still good, and pure, and thoughtful and kind and - it was a load of bollocks. He had stood up to Dumbledore, and would again if he had to. Strange that it was easier to go against Voldemort than it'd been to do the same to Dumbledore but he guessed that's why he had given those house points to Neville last year.
"Harold is just a name on a piece of paper," he said. "It doesn't mean anything. I'm still me, just like you'd still be you if your middle name really was Jørgensen."
She chuckled quietly at that, finding more humor in it a second time around. Hermione stepped away a bit and looked up at him; she seemed more at ease than she had before.
"You need some time to relax," she said as they started walking again.
Harry shrugged and stuck his hands in his pockets to give himself something to do. Hermione looped her arm through his and walked close to him. He thought it was probably best to pretend this was perfectly normal and happened all the time. It felt nice, but it wasn't exactly relaxing in the way she probably meant.
"Yeah," he said, nervously flattening his hair with his other hand, "but good luck with that. I still have the thing with the Hopefuls tomorrow and I've completely forgotten what you wanted to ask McGonagall about. I've actually been looking forward to going back to Hogwarts, just to be away from all - that," Harry waved backwards at Gringotts, half-hoping it would shoo the building away.
"If-if I can get my dad to agree to stay the night," Hermione said tentatively, not quite looking at him. "I still have to finish my shopping and all," she added quickly, picking at an imaginary spot on the arm of his robe. "Do-do you think you'd be interested in doing your shopping with me, and we can go to the Hopefuls thing together?"
Harry smiled as his heart leapt upwards.
"Yeah, that'd be great," he said. Going about with Hermione had been fun, and had certainly been the highlight of the day; Harry could definitely see doing that bit again. "You think you could get him to stay?"
"It'd be better than spending another six hours in the car to just make another trip or try to cram in some last-minute shopping before hopping on the train."
Even dawdling didn't make things last when you really wanted them to and it was then they found themselves at the brick wall that led to the Leaky Cauldron and they separated again. The barman must have shut it once Mr. Granger had come through. Harry hesitated on taking out his wand to open it, just in case her dad was waiting on the other side, ready to jump out and surprise them. Hermione seemed to share his concern.
"So what do you think," Hermione asked, suddenly nervous. "You could come by around eight and we can go from there?"
Suddenly everything seemed very real again, and he understood why she was nervous.
"Um - yeah," he said, suddenly unsure how he was supposed to stand. "Eight-eight sounds fine."
"Good," she said and then proceeded to stand there with him awkwardly. Was he supposed to do something now?
Hermione's forehead crinkled as she stared at his chest.
"Did your tie just change color?" she asked.
Harry looked down in time to see his outer robe drop open. Before he could open his mouth to speak his tie flew up and hit him in the face, untying itself before it disappeared. His Gryffindor crest popped back onto his robe while his left sleeve and right pants leg twitched and shortened back to where they were supposed to be. After a moment, the other two joined them in their humiliating retreat.
'Well, so much for making a good impression,' he thought. 'At least her dad didn't see that or he'd be- '
Hermione cracked up, laughing even harder than she had back at the pet shop, and Harry knew from living with Fred and George for a while he just had to stand there and take it. It wasn't so bad with her though since he liked to hear her laugh; though he thought it'd be funnier if it had happened to somebody else. By the time her laughter started dying down and she wiped a tear from her eye, Harry had thought of something to say.
"Well, I did say they weren't new," he said with a shrug, causing her to have a bout of giggles again.
"There's the Harry I remember, just beneath the surface. I'll see you tomorrow, Harry," she smiled, then, after a moment's hesitation, darted forward and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.