[Thanks, I'm already laughing.]
[I can already see what's coming!]
[Scott, you never disappoint—so ridiculous!]
— —
March 7th gave a wry smile. "Don't push yourselves too hard, guys! If you can't hold on, just retreat!"
"No need for your concern!!!"
Scott shouted, waving at the mechs to charge forward!
But things didn't go as planned.
The company employees seemed to struggle with every step, as if in agony.
"Ugh… my stomach hurts… what's going on…"
"My… my stomach's killing me too. Was there really something wrong with that stew?"
[Hahaha, the laxative's kicking in!]
[This plot is straight-up hilarious.]
[Peak chill vibes.]
[I want a life that blooms wildly!]
— —
Scott clutched his stomach. "Despicable Xianzhou folks!"
He glanced at the employees piloting the mechs behind him. "Whatever, just hold on! Take down this girl first!"
The employees nodded, but a sharp pain twisted their guts, and their defenses were about to collapse.
"No good, I feel like last night's dinner is abandoning me! Gotta… hit the bathroom! See ya!"
Scott cursed. "Cowards, don't run! Ughhh~"
The next moment, he clamped his legs together, desperately guarding his "city gates."
But another employee nearby couldn't hold out either. "Sorry! I can't take it anymore, it's gonna… gonna… gonna…"
Scott's face contorted further. "Enough, don't say it! Get out! Go!"
"It hurts… I'm seeing hallucinations…"
[Here come the abstract sound effects!]
[Hahaha, I'm dying—this is too funny just from the sounds alone!]
[You can tell from the noises Scott's struggling hard.]
[Did the writer nearly lose it in their pants while scripting this?]
— —
"The Astral Express is… speeding outward…" Scott kept rolling his eyes. "Damn it! Damn Astral Express! No departures allowed!"
[Hahahahaha!]
[It's a metaphor, I added a metaphor!]
[I was wondering what 'Astral Express' meant—now I get it!]
[Funniest episode ever—how is Scott this absurd?]
[Scott's actor deserves a medal—how does he make it so convincing?]
[I'm crying from laughter. This episode is pure gold.]
[Genius!]
[Help, my stomach hurts from laughing—funnier than Tail's bit!]
[Scott, I respect you now. Not becoming an Envoy of Elation is such a waste.]
— —
The screen went black, and the perspective shifted back to Aurum Alley.
Scott lay on the ground, utterly defeated.
"I lost. I lost. March 7th, you're too despicable."
March 7th gave an awkward laugh. "You should probably head to the bathroom…"
"No need anymore."
March 7th and Stelle: "…"
Stelle glanced at March 7th. "We were kinda shady."
March 7th's eyes glinted with a hint of excitement. "But deep down, it feels kinda satisfying. Is this the start of falling to the dark side?"
Scott turned his head slightly. "March 7th… I have one last thing to say."
"If you wanna curse me out, go ahead! I admit this was a bit much…"
"I respect you."
[Lone wolf's approval!]
[Hahaha, absurd (Tail's voice).]
[Family culture!]
[Look at Scott—he looks like he's done for.]
[Why do I feel like Scott's achieved some kind of battlefield enlightenment?]
[This video's got some flavor.]
— —
March 7th was caught off guard. "Huh?!?"
"March 7th, you're the first person I've met who's as despicable, ruthless, and unscrupulous as me. This time, you were more despicable, more ruthless, and more unscrupulous! I lost fair and square!
Maybe one day, we'll be real friends. If you ever want to work for the company, I'll write you a recommendation letter."
March 7th frowned. "Hearing your praise makes me so mad. Can I beat him up while he's down?"
Stelle nodded. "Go for it."
Scott, still lifeless, muttered, "Do it. I've got no strength left to fight back."
A single cold tear, carrying unbearable sorrow, slid from the corner of the man's eye.
March 7th shook her head. "Forget it. I won't take advantage of someone in a pinch."
"Brothers! Brothers! Any of you still moving? Save me!"
A few company employees who could still move rushed in, clumsily carrying Specialist Scott away.
Even Yanqing, hearing about this, could only sigh. "Miss March… next time, use some honorable methods, okay?"
"It wasn't my idea! That pink-haired fox acted on his own! At most, I'm just… just… practicing unrestricted swordplay?"
[I don't know why, but I can actually see some sincerity in Scott's performance.]
[This world is full of heroes!]
[Yanqing: When you're out there, just one request—don't mention your master's name.]
[This part is so absurd, but the scariest thing is, with Scott, it feels oddly reasonable.]
[Same. I can't handle it—this season is just too good at pulling this off.]
— —
"So, what do you think of my suggestion?"
At the mahjong table, a hotpot had somehow appeared.
Sparkle put a cooled piece of food back in her bowl. "Pink-haired fox, I'm eating here, okay? Who talks about stuff like this during a meal?"
"Ssss, ssss…" Qingque panted, overwhelmed by the spice. "Exactly! Don't bring up such shady stuff while we're eating! And another thing—why's this hotpot so spicy? Get me some vinegar! I'm dying!"
Sparkle clicked her tongue, then burst into laughter. "Actually, this idea's not bad. I'll take it. Hehehe… let's start shooting then."
"Hold on." Stelle raised a hand to stop Sparkle. "Since we're dealing with mechs, why not go for a more cyber approach?"
"Ahem… you've got some conscience." Silver Wolf's voice suddenly crackled through the office speakers. "How about I share a new idea too?"
Sparkle blinked. "Girl's got some spunk!"
— —
Time zipped back once again to the days of March 7th's sword training.
March 7th and Stelle happened to run into Silver Wolf's projection near the Artisanship Commission.
After some chatter, they learned Silver Wolf was there for a rare dual-attribute Aether Spirit.
Hard work paid off, and Silver Wolf finally nabbed the dual-attribute Aether Spirit.
The fifteen days flew by, and the day of the showdown arrived.
March 7th looked at Silver Wolf. "I'm about to face Scott. I'm so nervous."
"Nervous about what? Dealing with a few company grunts is easy."
"But during the duel, Scott's definitely gonna use their company's mechs. No matter how you slice it, those things aren't something two swords can handle!"
Stelle: "Their armor's too thick."
March 7th nodded. "Right? Even if Master Yanqing said this sword has hidden mechanisms to help with cutting… can it really slice through enemy mechs?"
Silver Wolf scratched her head. "Why obsess over physical damage? For a hacker, the ideal fight is breaking the enemy from the inside. Here, give me your sword."
March 7th obediently handed her weapon to Silver Wolf.
No one knew what Silver Wolf did to March 7th's sword.
After a quick scene transition, Silver Wolf had finished upgrading the blade. "All set. You're enhanced—go get 'em."
Stelle noticed only one sword. "What about the other one? No upgrades?"
"Programming's about less is more. Overdo it, and you're asking for glitches."
March 7th hefted the sword, inspecting it closely. "This… can beat Scott?"
"Hmph~ I love a Xianzhou saying: 'Know yourself, know your enemy, and your foe's done for.'"
"You made up that second half, didn't you…"
"What do you know? It's called… creative continuation! Now's not the time to debate Xianzhou proverbs—go show Scott what you've got!"