Qin Yu thought, This is absolutely the most outrageous thing that's ever happened in my life.
Keqing and Ningguang had both confessed to her!
And she had nearly gone all the way with Ningguang... Qin Yu recalled Ningguang's breath ghosting across her body, and her mind felt like it was overheating, making it difficult to think straight.
Did she hate it? No, she didn't hate it.
After all, Ningguang had been so gentle.
Though it made her feel incredibly awkward, it wasn't enough to stir any real aversion.
More than anything, she felt uneasy, tense, and embarrassed.
She had never encountered anything like this before. Faced with unfamiliar and uncomfortable situations, most people would feel at least somewhat bewildered.
But if she got used to this kind of thing, it would be a disaster!
Leaving that aside, the real issue was Keqing and Ningguang.
"Aaaah, why did I accept both of them...?" Qin Yu clutched her head, groaning softly.
She had accepted Keqing's confession and Ningguang's confession. Just thinking about it made her stomach clench.
Of course she was happy that Ningguang liked her.
Even now, recalling Ningguang's words filled her chest with warmth.
Qin Yu was deeply grateful that she had confessed everything to Ningguang and found reassurance in Ningguang's response.
But when she remembered what had happened after their confession, she covered her eyes.
"Aaaah—!"
Ningguang undoubtedly harbored a complex range of emotions for her, and Keqing felt the same. Somewhere along the line, these feelings had transformed, ultimately leading to their current state.
Ningguang loved her, and Keqing loved her too.
And I accepted their confessions.
What the future held was impossible to predict.
What's so good about a woman like me? I don't understand... Qin Yu couldn't fathom why they harbored romantic feelings for her, but whether she deserved such affection was irrelevant for now.
Because it was insignificant.
Only one thing mattered.
Clutching her knees, Qin Yu sighed deeply. "What should I do?"
Shenhe quietly observed Qin Yu, who was once again contemplating life on the sofa. As expected, Qin Yu is still troubled by something.But what should I do?
Ganyu had advised her to wait and see if any clues emerged.
But the clues were already glaringly obvious. I should just ask her.
Shenhe couldn't bear to leave Qin Yu to struggle alone. She sat beside her and softly asked, "You're still troubled by something, aren't you?"
"Shenhe... This..." Qin Yu hesitated, knowing Shenhe cared about her but unable to bring herself to voice her dilemma.
After a moment of silence, Shenhe said, "I want to help you, to share your burden."
Evaluation: B
"I... I know, Shenhe, I know how much you care about me," Qin Yu said softly. "But... to be honest, this is really hard to put into words. I can't even figure it out myself."
"What's the problem?"
She's really not letting this go, Qin Yu thought with a helpless sigh.
She didn't expect Shenhe to offer any useful advice, but since Shenhe was so concerned, keeping it bottled up wouldn't be fair.
After a moment's thought, Qin Yu asked, "If two people you're close to confessed their feelings for you, what would you think?"
Another question like that.
First it was this, and now this again. Why does Qin Yu keep pondering such things? Still, since she asked, Shenhe pondered the question earnestly for a while.
"Do they mean they want to become my lovers?"
"Ah-hm... yes."
"Why are there two people?" Shenhe suddenly asked.
Qin Yu chuckled awkwardly. "Ah ha ha, sometimes things just happen like that—two people liking you at the same time. Anyway, just tell me what you think, Shenhe!"
"I don't know."
Just as I expected! Qin Yu thought.
This was clearly too complicated for Shenhe. If even Qin Yu couldn't figure it out, how could Shenhe possibly understand?
Qin Yu smiled faintly. "It's okay, it's okay. This is a really complicated situation."
So I'll have to figure this out myself after all.
With that realization, Qin Yu grew even more troubled. She had absolutely no idea what to do.
Hearing Qin Yu's response, Shenhe didn't feel relieved at all. Instead, a slight tightness settled in her chest.
"I don't know" was indeed her genuine thought, but it offered no help at all.
It didn't resolve Qin Yu's distress, nor did it truly assist her in any meaningful way.
Shenhe pondered the reason, concluding it might be because she herself didn't understand the nature of love.
That's right, Shenhe thought, recalling Ganyu's advice: When facing a difficult problem at work, try approaching it from a different angle. With renewed determination, she asked:
"What about making a choice?"
"A choice?"
Shenhe nodded. "Like with dishes. If you can't finish them all, simply choose one of the two."
A choice.
Does she mean I have to choose between Keqing and Ningguang? I must be truly 'strong' to have to choose between dating the Yuheng and the Tianquan, Qin Yu sighed inwardly.
Yet this was indeed the most logical and reasonable approach.
Choose one... Choose... Keqing and Ningguang... The more Qin Yu thought about it, the more suffocated she felt. What would happen after the choice? The chosen one would be ecstatic, while the other would be utterly devastated.
If I choose Keqing, will Ningguang grow even more distant?
If I choose Ningguang, will a rift form between me and Keqing?
Qin Yu wanted to avoid both scenarios. All she wanted was to maintain her relationships with Shenhe and the others as they were. To her, preserving their current dynamic was paramount; if a romantic relationship would jeopardize that, she'd rather do without it.
Love is such a pain.
"...What if I can't choose between them?" Qin Yu asked weakly.
"Either you take all of them, or you take none."
Qin Yu froze, startled.
Take all of them? Take none? She hadn't considered those options, too focused on preventing their current relationships from being disrupted or severed.
But "take all of them" would mean accepting both their confessions and becoming their shared girlfriend. Putting aside the enormous complications, even the feasibility of such an arrangement seemed questionable.
And "take none" would mean rejecting both confessions, refusing to become anyone's girlfriend. No winners, no losers.
"You can't please everyone, but you can certainly displease them all"—that's the truth of it.
But...
I've already accepted them, Qin Yu thought awkwardly.
If she chose the "reject all" path, she would have to turn down both Keqing and Ningguang one after the other.
She couldn't imagine how they would feel or how they would react.
Besides, rejecting everyone wouldn't magically return things to how they used to be. Ningguang and Keqing's feelings had already changed, and the alteration of their bond was irreversible.
However, choosing "have it all" didn't guarantee a happy ending either.
If her deception were exposed, Ningguang and Keqing's reactions would be even more unpredictable, and the consequences would likely be even more disastrous.
Either option feels terrible, she thought.
If she hadn't impulsively accepted their confessions, she might still have room to maneuver—or rather, room to procrastinate. But now that she had accepted, she had to make a choice.
A two-way split.
Have it all.
Reject all.
I can't figure it out... Qin Yu's head throbbed faintly. These past few days had been a relentless rollercoaster of emotional turmoil, leaving her utterly exhausted.
Shenhe asked, "Qin Yu, have you been confessed to?"
"Eh?"
"You've been pondering this kind of thing lately... Are you going to become someone else's lover?" A strange, unusual light flickered in Shenhe's eyes.
Qin Yu stammered, "Well, it's... because..."
"I don't understand what love is, but you seem to. So tell me."
Shenhe reached out and gently pressed her hand against Qin Yu's chest. "If you become someone else's lover, will we still be family? If so, can we still live together in this house?"
Qin Yu shared the same unease.
"I don't know. Shenhe, you'll always be my family, of course. But if they don't approve of us living together, I'll have to make another choice." Qin Yu pressed her hand over Shenhe's and shook her head gently.
If only love didn't exist. But that wasn't her decision to make.
"...I see. I want to live with you forever, Qin Yu—live together, die together, and never be separated by anything."
Evaluation: A-
Qin Yu's gaze softened as she gently replied, "Me too."
Whether friend or family, whatever the relationship, as long as that connection remained, strong enough to never break, Qin Yu would be content.
Indeed, regardless of the relationship.
Not wanting to sever ties, not wanting to part ways—this desire, though perhaps excessively greedy in their current circumstances, was what Qin Yu truly sought.
And to achieve this, the best option was... to have it all.
...Can it be done? How?
Qin Yu sank into fresh confusion and bewilderment.
Watching Qin Yu like this, Shenhe felt she still hadn't been of much help. Perhaps it was because she didn't understand the nature of love.
If she understood love, could she truly help Qin Yu? If so, how could she come to comprehend it?
Previously, Qin Yu had explained that confessing was a way to express love, a declaration that could make two people lovers.
Kissing, she had added, was an act that deepened the relationship, and love was an emotion far deeper than mere fondness.
If Qin Yu confessed to me, kissed me, and became my lover, would I finally understand? Shenhe mused, feeling a sudden, inexplicable flutter in her chest as she continued to gaze at Qin Yu.