S.H.I.E.L.D. Headquarters
Nick Fury stared at the monitor, completely stunned.
"Did I hear that right? An interaction test with 682?" he muttered, rubbing his one good eye.
SCP-682—the ultimate nightmare.
An unstoppable, hate-filled reptilian creature that even the Foundation feared.
And now they were introducing SCP-999 into its containment chamber?
"Are they trying to cure it... or commit murder with kindness?"
He kept watching in disbelief as Dr. Kondraki calmly inserted a tape into the terminal.
The screen lit up.
And there it was—SCP-682, massive as a mountain, coiled and waiting.
Muscles layered like armor. Predatory eyes. Its very presence chilled the soul.
Then, SCP-999—a small, orange blob that looked like sentient Jell-O—was released into the chamber.
"What the hell are they thinking?" Fury mumbled.
To everyone's shock, 999 wasn't afraid at all.
It wiggled happily toward 682, even making playful giggles.
"Ku-ku-ku~"
The viewers leaned in. This was going to be brutal.
And yet—
682 just... froze.
It blinked in confusion, visibly disturbed.
"What the hell is this?" it growled in deep, monstrous tones.
999 continued bouncing around like a hyperactive puppy, barking in its own weird way.
"Hehehe~"
"Ugh... Disgusting." 682 groaned.
Then, it lunged!
But not with its usual world-ending fury.
682 attacked... physically, trying to slap and squash 999 like an annoying bug.
But its claws slid off harmlessly.
999's gelatinous body just wobbled and reformed.
Security staff outside the test room panicked. They reached for the abort switch.
Then something strange happened.
"Uhh... what is this feeling?" 682 rumbled.
It scratched itself. Twitched. Gurgled.
"Why do I feel... itchy?"
999 was now climbing up the side of 682's massive body, gently rubbing it with its pseudopods.
And then—
682 smiled.
It was bizarre. Unnatural.
"I feel... happy..."
The room fell silent.
SCP-682 began laughing. Loud, hysterical, floor-shaking laughter.
Bang! Bang!
Its tail thrashed around, pounding the walls.
In Kamar-Taj, the Ancient One watched the screen in disbelief.
"682... laughing?"
She rubbed her temples. Was this a dream? A curse? A hallucination?
"Is that monster really related to the Crimson King?"
Even James, who always kept his cool, looked surprised.
Dr. Kondraki crossed his legs and grinned.
"I told you. No one can resist this little guy."
On screen, 682 gasped between fits of laughter:
"Stop! Stop tickling! I'm going to explode!"
The tickle battle raged for fifteen full minutes before 682 finally collapsed.
It lay still, smiling. At peace.
Then two D-Class personnel entered and removed 999.
But the moment 999 left, everything changed.
682 snapped awake, unleashed a psychic wave—and all nearby staff began laughing uncontrollably.
It escaped its cell, laughing like a maniac, killing everything in its path.
The screen was painted red.
Amid the chaos, 999 risked everything to protect the staff.
It dodged 682's claws, pulling people out of the "laughter zone" to safety.
Eventually, Foundation agents subdued 682 and re-contained it.
Dr. Kondraki lit a cigarette and exhaled calmly.
"That little guy's brave," he said. "Didn't flinch. Even tried to play with 682."
He glanced at James and smirked.
"682's exact words were: 'That disgusting little snot-blob should be [DATA EXPUNGED] dead.'"
James didn't reply, but his mind was spinning.
Dr. Kondraki continued:
"Sure, it ended in disaster... but man, that was the funniest thing I've ever seen."
He chuckled. "I'm keeping a copy of this tape for myself."
The livestream audience exploded:
> "682 looked stupid! I loved it!"
"I'm crying—999 is adorable and heroic!"
"Raise your hand if you want a 999 at home."
"Best job in the Foundation? No wonder James got it."
Back at S.H.I.E.L.D., Natasha stood up smugly.
"So... James got this task because the O5 wanted to give him a vacation?" she smirked.
Nick Fury said nothing.
His eyes narrowed.
This didn't feel like a vacation.
In Kamar-Taj, the Ancient One suddenly felt a shift.
When 682 released its psychic wave, she sensed something inside 999... something familiar.
"That bloodline... it's faint but real. The Crimson King."
Her face turned pale.
"999 shares his blood... with 682?"
In the Observer Dimension, the Watcher known as Uatu clenched his fists.
"That scent... it can't be..."
---
Back in the dormitory, James had just returned to his room when a pop-up appeared on his computer.
> [URGENT NOTICE: Foundation Terminal Online. Please Enter Credentials]
James raised an eyebrow and typed in his login.
A message flashed:
> [Hello, Dr. James. You have (1) new message: O5 Directive]
[Unauthorized access will trigger memory wipes and possible termination.]
James hesitated... then clicked "Yes."
Facial scan. Iris scan. Palm print. RFID tag.
The full biometric check took place.
Finally—
> [ACCESS GRANTED. This event has been logged with O5 Command.]
James leaned forward.
The screen displayed:
---
> [Source: O5 Command]
[Subject: SCP-999 Assignment | Level 5 Clearance]
> "Congratulations, Dr. James, on being appointed Chief Researcher for SCP-999. This is considered one of the easiest and most desirable roles in the entire Foundation."
> "SCP-999 is not only safe, but will actively attempt to protect staff. If you were celebrating this assignment, we understand."
> "Still, you may be wondering—why would the O5 Council assign a Safe-class anomaly to such a high-level researcher?"
> "Maybe you've heard rumors... that we assign these jobs to protect our own. That we give the safest jobs to friends or family."
James frowned.
The audience chuckled.
> "Unless you believe you're secretly related to an O5 Council member... you probably realize that's not the case."
---
To be continued…
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