"Sally. You are on a Secret Island, fighting a Grand Dark Rizzard-ette who is fondling a long hardened stick of wood and shooting stuffs out of it at you, over Ex Vitro Pregnancy Blueprints which will change the Future of the World as we know it. You have to stop this person, but you also have to protect your Anti-Rizz family."
"Maybe if you had spoken to Bob earlier, revealed that you were Allie, things might be different. But you have to face Reality. Right now, you have to focus… You have to be strong…!"
Sally's eyes were shining, glistening with unshed tears of determination, even as she worked herself up to cross the point of no return…
And, of course…
It was at this very moment…
Just when Sally had just about resigned herself to the Cold Reality of Life…
…
It was at this climactic moment…
…
That Bob arrived!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
___
"This… this is why we read!!!"
"… This is why we feel!!!"
Was this… what it was, to be human?
Perhaps it was true. Sometimes, perhaps the point of stories was to hold a mirror up to the Humanity within all of us, that connects us all together as One, highlighting the beauty, the strength, the moments of timeless eternity that lie amongst the tragedies and imperfections that make Life what it is, pointing to the Oneness that we could feel… the realisation that, perhaps, just perhaps, we may be part of something bigger and, even, better.
Humans are currently many things, paradoxical, limited, inefficient. And yet, it is this very Humanness, this limited Awareness, that somehow can result in the most exquisite moments, that can make one feel that the whole journey, full of ups and downs, might, in fact, have been worth it after all.
"...Why, exactly, do people irrationally, stubbornly, insistently, cling to Hope, against the odds?"
Sally herself didn't know why, but somehow, in hindsight, Bob's arrival was something that seemed inevitable... although practically, she knew, logically, that it was absolutely against the odds... But sometimes, this just was how Life - and Stories - worked…!!!
That said, Bob's [Plot Armor] Ability had only reached Level 32, still nowhere near influential levels, and accordingly, he did still have to actually do stuff, although turning up at the right time was clearly, definitely a good start!!!
___
Bob of course, due to the usual shameless set-up from Author, had also made the trip down the Ice Tunnel at this critical point, where everything was, literally, approaching "Absolute Zero"…
Oh. There were a lot of Dark Rizzards piled up in a mound, seemingly knocked out from the battle, as well as three… were they… Pirates?! That were enjoying their Ice Cream straight from the freezer?!
It seemed like they… couldn't help themselves as they enjoyed their sweet and salty... creamy treats together...
These Pirates appeared to be interesting people though. There were still a few extra moments before he was meant to arrive according to the script and storyboard, and so, after utilizing his Rizz and quickly connecting up with them, (yes, he actually calmly listened to Pyers promote "The Pirates' Way", swapped details, and afterwards, they even offered him the final Golden Gayétime from the pack of 4 as a gesture of goodwill !!! 🫢✨) Bob continued into the EVP Blueprint HQ, where he hoped he wasn't too late. With his Level 143 [Expanded Awareness], he knew full well that Author was unbelievably shameless, and loved building the tension and cutting things fine…
At this point - and as if to prove the point - Author was currently cutting an onion finely, in order to enjoy a cheese and onion toastie[1], and also to hand out to the planted Audience members so that they could simulate 'tearing up with emotion' to better hype up the upcoming scene…
[1] A 'toastie' is basically a toasted sandwich, usually made by putting the sandwich in a sandwich press.
At the same time, the esteemed Readers also knew that, for all his Shamelessness, this Author generally aimed to avoid filler where he could help it, since life was too short! They knew that he believed the main thing was genuinely aiming to write something that would share value and or entertain...
And so, even as they all enjoyed their cheese and onion toasties, they knew the drill, and continued to throw their powerstones at him to support 🤭✨
[As always, More powerstones results in More development for Author as well as other in-story perks and surprises… 🫢✨ Thank you for your contribution!!!! 💖]
___
Regardless. The time had come.
*Bob enters the "Central Convenience Store - EVP Blueprint HQ" even as the visual goes into a freeze-frame that captures the surreal scene, a touching tableau that (hopefully 🤭) imprints vividly into our minds and imaginations for time immemorial…*
Itvasme, the gorgeous Grand Dark Rizzard, her Dark Rizzard Cloak™ aesthetically aflutter, surrounded by a crackling halo of red energy, is shooting out a flashing, dark red stunning spell out of her Dark Rizzard Wand™ with a kind of hot, and definitely crazy, laugh!
The lovely Ice Queen Sally, her goddess-esque Anti-Rizz Realm Snowcloak™ also billowing dramatically, a look of determination on her face and her beautiful eyes shining, is glowing, radiant with her Icy-Blue Aura, about to unleash her all-consuming magical Anti-Rizz Index Spell… "Absolute Zero"…
The ARSES Members Tristen and Rowena are behind her, slumped against the wall…
*Bob takes it all in.*
Wow. This was clearly quite the showdown…
And there was definitely no time to waste.
Immediately, with his Level 397 Empathy, he could tell that things had reached a climactic, do-or-die point.
Ice Queen Sally… was clearly about to unleash an Armageddon-esque amount of Anti-Rizz…
The Grand Dark Rizzard Itvasme, it seemed, kind of knew that things were going to go Apocalyptic, but at the same time, it seemed that she also saw no other way. She was going to achieve her goals, in the only way she knew how, according to the way that she believed the World worked...!!!
All of this takes a while to explain, but of course, thanks to Bob's regular, consistent training, all of this detailed processing in fact, as usual, naturally took place within the span of just a few brief moments… !!!
And so...
It was time.
*As Bob takes in all of these factors, his Level 176 [Flawless Perception, Flawless Judgement] Ability activates, allowing him to immediately accurately comprehend the gist of the situation from subtle signs, tell-tale tells, and the copious clues!!!*
*His eyes begin to glow, channeling Divine Actualised Power, with the complete absence of Ego, and he locks in via his Level 433 Results-Oriented Focus, taking into account his Level 327 Positive Intention, his Level 346 First Principles Thinking, his Level 422 Proactivity, and his Level 333 Systems Understanding and Creation…*
As he enters the EVP Blueprint HQ… his Eyes suddenly begin to glow… … … with the Power of Rizz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
___
"Hey~" The masculine and earthy voice, imbued with the power of a base 367 000 000 000 Rizz Index and Augmented by a 32% Bonus from [Gift of the Goddess] and his 57% Magic Treasure Augmentation, rings and reverberates, resonating throughout the room...!
"Sally!"
"Itvasme!"
"Wait!"
A commanding, yet kind tone, full of empowering, rich, warmth, and warm, rich, empowerment echoes through the expanse, giving everyone chills-down-the-spine electrifying tingles and goosebumps from his honed, heart-filled Aura. Nor was it harsh, domineering or overblown - rather, Bob's sheer "Art of Touch" presence, which had reached a Touch Index of 5 483 000 000, suddenly cocoons the whole Central Convenience Store HQ in a compelling, compassionate caress…?!!!
___
And to cut a long story short, Sally and Itvasme… stopped fighting, and called it a day.
"…"
"Yeah…"
"Haha."
"…"
"…"
___
"??!??!!!"
The Audience were on the edge of their seats, wanting more.
But it seemed that Author was… being Author?!?!
"Huh...?"
"Is that it?"
"Y-You cannot be serious!!!"
"...Author, you cannot get away with this!!!!"
"You cannot leave us hanging!!!!"
"I demand to know more details of what happened!!!!!!"
"What did Bob do?!"
"How?!?! And what is going on?!?!?!"
Various outbursts were yelled out, and taken up as an echoing, vocal cry of protest by the esteemed readers, who were not believing what they were reading!!!!
Author of course, made as if to explain.
But then.
Oh!!!
But… But... they… they were out of time!!!!! Due to the intense battle, many of the pillars, the structural foundations of the Central Convenience Store - EVP Blueprint HQ, had been seriously damaged!!!
*Shake Shake…* *Rumble Rumble…*
Oh no!!! The pillars were giving out, and the entire Central Convenience Store - EVP Blueprint HQ was now collapsing!!!!!!!!
"Oh, W-We… We gotta go!!!!!!" Author shamelessly exhorted the Audience. Safety… Safety was paramount!!! He shamelessly utilised the sudden shift in scene- *which he himself had written* - in order to skilfully side-step the Audience's seething sentiments...
Sally glanced at Itvasme. Itvasme glanced back at Sally.
They both looked at Bob, who shrugged. "Uh... Look, I may be the MC, but even I don't know what Author has planned you know, like I'm not that OP, remember."
"-Anyway, it's time to go!!!"
"-Look, Everything can be negotiated with Powerstones later!!!! But for now…
"-Evacuate!!!!"
___
"-Evacuate?!?!!!"
"?!?!!!!?!!!?!?"
"-I -Refuse -To -Go!!!!"
"-Unhand me!!!"
Even as Author urged the usual 'big men' to usher the Audience towards the exits, people were shouting out in protest, and the emotions of all in attendance were in absolute disarray.
Some were demanding that Author "explain and elaborate", or that "they would drop!!!!"
Even the normally calm, reasonable members who usually defended Author were themselves in turmoil, churning with equal-parts anger, anxiousness, and anticipation, since they too wanted more details on how Bob had managed to somehow step in and see this Showdown off to a satisfying conclusion?!?!?!
One thing was constant. On the whole, The Audience were, once again, as always, on some level or another, rendered absolutely *speechless* by Author's Sheer Shamelessness…!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
___
That said ✨💖🤭🌻
Of course, as a kind-hearted and good looking person, just like the esteemed Readers of this novel, Author knew that he couldn't just leave them hanging!!!
Accordingly, after the shocking scare and literal scene shake-up, crafted to ensure maximal enjoyment and entertainment for the esteemed readers who had read up to this point 💖✨, he accordingly provided a more in-depth, blow-by- blow account for their reading enjoyment!!! 🤭✨🔥
___
"Hey~"
Bob was also, naturally, in [Zone State], and accordingly began with his trademark usual go-to phrase, trained from countless experienced repetitions via his Level 157 [Automatic Response] and powered by his 7 848 000 000 Subconscious Index.
"Sally!"
"Itvasme!"
"Wait!"
Bob had arrived, his eyes glowing with the power of Rizz!!!!
*Suddenly, a hectic soundtrack begins to play, as Bob strides forward!!!*
Sally pauses in her Absolute-Zero Cold-Cast, as she intuitively responds to his warm, masculine tone - and exceptional genetic quality, which had clearly reached at least the A+++++++ grade of genetic potential?!?!?!
Itvasme gasps as she is struck by Bob's rich presence, making her feel something strange, something warm and… buttery deep inside her, which she had not felt since… forever ?!?!?!
It... makes her feel… met, understood, wrapped in a warm embrace that soothes a deep, long-forgotten part of her, her inner child-like self that she had forgotten even existed...
*Suddenly we white-cut to a flashback of Itvasme's past, in a special scene that is an Imagined, Internal World that is inhabited by Itvasme's younger self.*
*Currently, the colour correction of the scene is cold, dark, and bleak. A harsh wind is blowing, and the music is harsh and discordant.*
"Mama… Papa… W-wake up!!!"
A child that cried, but no one came.
A young person who learned not to cry, because they knew that no one would come.
A pretty girl who experienced countless senseless tragedies and grief…
A beautiful young woman who learned that, in order to survive in this world, one had to be prepared to do difficult things…
Time slows. In this private inner world, Itvasme's Imagined Inner Sanctum, a handsome kind person… It's Bob!!!!!?!?!... Bob appears, and wipes the tears from the young child's face. "Don't cry... I'm here. It's going to be all right now…" Bob seems to say, his kind Eyes shining with something warm and magical...
The young person who begins to smile…
*Suddenly, the colours of the scene begins to tinge with an increasingly warm glow.*
The pretty girl that begins to hope…
*The music begins to slowly surge, mirroring this surprising feeling...*
The beautiful young woman, that begins to… believe?!?!?!!
*The landscape, which was once barren, begins to show signs of life?!*
"..."
"WTF?!?!?!?!?! H-How!?!?!?!!!"
"I-I, I need this Rizz!!!!"
"Uh, Hasn't Bob just said Itvasme's name?!?! How could this be?!?!"
The Audience, although a little more calm after Author explained that the staged 'Evacuation' was only happening in the story itself and had provided the follow-up, were nonetheless, still extremely invested, and absolutely losing it over this latest development...
Even Author himself was impressed by the sheer power of Bob's Rizz.
"Well, I didn't see that coming... I guess this was the power of resonance, of calibration, of genuine Intention… " He says, with a note of subtly self-reflexive admiration…
"This… This was the Power… of Rizz!!!!!!!!!!"
___
Of course, it wasn't that simple. Itvasme was still a Grand Dark Rizzard. She wouldn't trust so easily!!!! But after experiencing Bob's insane Rizz, having her Inner World shaken up and stirred... this was enough for her… to hesitate.
Hope. Belief. Bob… This Guy…
Maybe t-there might be another way?!?!
But, even as Itvasme dispelled the thoughts and aimed to refocus on the Showdown and the situation at hand, this was when the actual real-world *shakes* and *rumbles* began, as the Central Convenience Store - EVP Blueprint HQ began to collapse from the cumulative damage taken from their battle!!!
___
Meanwhile, Sally was also very briefly confused, as to why and how Bob had seemingly magically arrived at the eleventh hour.
This was immediately followed by a flash of something that sparked deep within her, which she had not realised she still held...
...Later on, when she had time to process and reflect, she would realise that it was, in fact, the feeling of Hope that refused to die, the feeling that the Universe wasn't quite so vast, after all... that maybe, just maybe... She wasn't entirely... alone?!?!
Oh Bob...!!! You came!!!!! You really came...!!!!!!! Sally was feeling something that she couldn't even fully describe, except to say that it felt both wonderful, overwhelming, wonderful again, and incredible... a joy, peace, happiness, warmth... even a feeling of faintness, but one which soon gave way to fullness, vigor, strength, and vitality.
But she was of course Sally, the Future Ice Queen, with an insane -999 999 999 999 Anti-Rizz Index...
Accordingly, all of these state-shifts also obviously only happened within a few brief moments, and largely occurred internally, which just goes to show that one should not judge the true Internal Reality based only off of External Appearances... For, from what one could see, after merely a brief flash of surprise, recognition, and other 'inexplicable' emotions, Sally briefly paused her "Absolute Zero", and raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow, as if all of this was within her expectations...
"Oh... Bob?! What took you so long?!"
"..."
___