Mor Mun Ni rubs his hands in glee, as he leans back on his premium, plush spinny chair…
There has been an insane demand, as we would soon see, for authentic Santa Claus beard hair…!?!?
Everything, it seemed, was going according to his plans.
He stroked his chin, even as he fondly admired [what he believed was] his absolute stroke of genius, namely that, in one fell stroke - or perhaps a few more passes of the razor if necessary - he had, apparently, found the hidden 'needle' of opportunity, where others had merely seen a 'haystack' of hairs…
The Santa Claus beard reapings had, as of right now, reaped him rich rewards.
To be honest, even he had initially been surprised by the demand for what had become his best-selling "Beard bundle" - which consisted of a Santa Claus Costume that featured the prestigious, plucked prize - an "original", "authentic", and "100% genuine" Santa Claus beard crafted for… "discerning connoisseurs"…
"Sometimes, my sheer ability and aptitude astonishes even myself…"
Mor had, initially, just intended to make a quick buck. He had been wrapped up in his raison d'etre - rigorously raging at Valentine for existing - and at that point, all riled up, he had resorted to this ruthless racket... but then! He realised... he had somehow still managed to make a packet!!!
It all made sense of course, Mor rationalized in hindsight, reflecting and basking in his own blinding brilliance.
After the AI revolution in the early 21st century, there had been a niche, but extremely potent reactionary backlash where certain people had become obsessed with acquiring real and authentic things - reclaiming the 'human element' allegedly - and apparently, of all things, possessing a genuine Santa Claus beard, an icon of past human greatness pre-AI - had, in the sweeping spirit of the 'counter-revolution', become widely considered and acknowledged as a luxury item, and a sign of class, status, and good taste.
Mor Mun Ni sneered. It really went to show the truth of the old adage - that one man's trash was indeed another man's treasure!
He had, of course, taken advantage of this - to him - glaringly obvious 'weakness' in the market share, and exploited it mercilessly, without a care.
The subliminal advertising, featuring 'real' Santas getting glazed, with praise (and nothing else to be clear in order to keep this novel 'PG') in the background as people browsed online, had been powerfully pushed and promoted, plying and pressuring various grown and aged men, and even apparently some... women, to claim the "limited edition", "consummate Santa Claus costume" for themselves...! [or... perhaps, it was... a gift...???? But the exact details of these... purchasing preferences would be, perhaps, a story for a later chapter... 👀]
Of course, despite the coup, there was still one thing - *one person* - putting a… hair in his soup… and accordingly, Mor had a few... more items listed on his agenda, all of which primarily involved him dealing, in various ways, once and for all, with that unbelievable upstart, who possessed even more legal tender!? than him -Valentine Richést…!!!
The next thing on his to-do list, as always, was to "Make more money". If all went well, beard harvesting was just the beginning. He would leave no growth opportunity to profit unshorn…
Speaking of which... Aaahhh… Profit...!!! Was there any other better reason to do something?!?!
Well, of course, Mor was self-aware, and knew that he wasn't *that* shallow - And to be fair, his other main motivations included 1. De-throning Valentine 2. Being richer than Valentine And… 3… Destroying Valentine so that he couldn't recover, once and for all.
And finally, in his highly-self-esteemed estimation, he had, after some considerable consideration, come up with the perfect plan, to make his ruminations reality.
Rumours had circulated around, in the business… circle, that Valentine had established some kind of partnership with the legendary businessman, Scroogeux Overson - whose investments were fabled to always profit - and that the discerning man had decided to take Valentine Richést under his wing…!?
Oh! The sting…! to his… sensibilities [that is, his Ego] was strong.
What was wrong!? with him, Mor Mun Ni? Why could that old man not see????
Mor had, in fact, earlier made an overture to Scroogeux Overson, back when Valentine had been an unknown name, back when he [believed that he] had been at the top of his game, and back when he, Mor Mun Ni, had ruled at the top of the trillionaire's food chain! [This was, in actual fact, courtesy of having newly come into access of his trust fund] only to be shockingly… declined!?, and with all potential business deals left unsigned…
But! Mor Mun Ni would not be resigned!
Whether by crook or hook, he wouldn't just sit down and sook.
Why, if the old man proved evasive… then he would find... other ways, to prove persuasive…!!!