After everyone spent a good minute or two taking out their anger on me, the dogpile ended, and I was finally freed; the first thing I did was put Orga into a rear-naked choke and rub my knuckles into his scalp. "You bastard! How could you just throw me under the bus!?" "Argh! Ahh! W-What's a bus!?"
Ignoring Orga's nonsense, I tossed him into the wall before regrouping with everyone, discussing our next plan of action. "So if we want to survive, we have to tell a secret? I mean, that's not so bad." Gray was the one to speak, receiving several voices and nods in agreement. "We don't even know if what the goddess says is true; what if she still kills us afterwards?" Warren retorted, his voice more pessimistic, while Levy added some words of wisdom.
"If she was going to do that, I think she'd just kill us outright; look what she's capable of, she's definitely capable of doing so… Of course, unless she's sadistic." "H-Hey, don't say that, now I'm scared." Wendy shivered in fear at Levy's words. "W-Why is this happening to me?"
While they continued to discuss, I rubbed my chin before heading to the wall, knocking it down with a punch; all focus was shifted to me. "What are you doing, big bro?" Erza glanced at me with narrowed eyes while requiping a mace in her hand, causing me to smirk while pointing at the statue.
"Destroy the statue, obviously!" "Big bro, are you being serious?" This time, it was Mira to speak as she grabbed the bridge of her nose while eyeing me in frustration, which I nodded to. "Yep. If that's what's going to kill us, all I have to do is kill it first." Grinning, satisfied with my plan, I called out to Happy and Carla.
"Happy, get me to that statue! Carla, you too, come help!" "Aye!" "Co- Big bro, why don't we think about this? We shouldn't act so hastily!" "Bah, fine, just stay behind if you're scared."
Dismissively waving my hand at Carla, who was trying to speak reason, Happy grabbed my hand and lifted me into the sky, speedily shooting towards the statue while Natsu, Elfman, and Sting cheered me on. "Whoo! You've got it, big bro!" "That's right! A Man does what he wants!" "Haha, so awesome!"
As Happy flew us closer, we kept ascending, getting to the point where we eventually reached eye-level with the massive statue that dwarfed even mountains. "T-This thing really is big." Happy spoke softly while observing the statue, though I just grinned. "Hehe, that just makes it so much more fun to break it!"
Once we got high enough, Happy proceeded to fly in a circle before hurling me at the statue, causing me to grin as I brought out the full potential of my magic. "Haha, die!" As I shot through the sky directly at the statue's forehead, I clenched my fist and punched it, creating a massive explosion, yet, other than the flare of impact, there wasn't a single speck of damage, not even a scuff mark.
'Tsk, fucking hard.' Grabbing onto the forehead, I shook my hand in pain before climbing up, reaching the top of the head after nearly a minute. "Since an all-out punch isn't enough, what about this?" With a bloodthirsty grin, I overflowed my body with magic, causing my body to radiate a golden light from the sheer volume of magic.
'Tsk, damn, this hurts.' I could already feel my insides squirming in pain; even with my immense endurance, I couldn't keep such a high-powered state for long. Channeling my magic power into my right arm, I clenched my fist and punched, swinging with a level of strength I'd never done so till this day.
"DIE!"
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"So, how'd it go, Cooper?" I flinched lightly at Gramp's sarcastic voice before awkwardly turning around, revealing my mangled right arm, causing Wendy to nearly faint. "I-It didn't go as I planned." If time wasn't of the essence, I was confident Gramps would've rubbed in my failure.
While Wendy helped heal my arm, which wasn't going to do much given its state, everyone else came to the same conclusion Gray and Levy had reached earlier; as for me, I just remained quiet, opting to save myself from further humiliation. "Don't worry, big bro, whether you win or lose, what separates a man from a true man is never admitting defeat!" Confidently grinning, Elfman patted my arm, causing me faintly nod.
"Okay, so who is revealing their secret first? We've got 10 minutes remaining, so be quick." At Erza's question, everyone looked at each other, obviously no one wanted to be the first one to speak, only for Gramps to clear his throat. "As the eldest, I think I'll go first." With a solemn expression, Gramps stood atop the table, prompting everyone to silently gaze at him as he lifted his head.
"Whenever I'm on a business trip, I'm actually visiting brothels in a different city." A faint blush rose to Gramps's cheeks as he said his secret while the women gave him a weird look. "Haa, wow, Master." Placing her hands on her hips, Bisca slowly shook her head while looking at Gramps, expressing the feeling every woman was currently experiencing.
"Haha, that's our Master!" "Even at such an old age, he's still lively!" "I respect you even more!" "Heh, if Master is doing that, then we old men should have no shame!" Clearly, the men's feelings were vastly different from those of the women, prompting us to earn disgusted looks from them. 'Well, I agree with them.'
However, before we could move on to the next question, a mechanical, almost robotic voice echoed throughout the guild. "Denied." Instantly, we all froze and looked at Gramps. "Gramps, is that really a secret?" "Tsk, yes, dammit!" "Then why did she deny it?" "M-Maybe it wasn't secretive enough? The Goddess said we must reveal a deep secret."
Levy tried to explain why Gramps failed, though a few of them were having it. "Hah, I was right! She just wants to humiliate us before killing us!" "Why are you happy, Warren!? We're all about to die!" "Damn, I can't experience a bit of joy before I die!?"
Although I was also skeptical, I was still more inclined to trust Levy; not only was she arguably the smartest, but all of her reasons have made sense until now. 'Surely a Goddess wouldn't find joy in this; what's fun with picking on a bunch of ants?'
While rubbing my chin, Gramps gathered everyone's attention with a loud shout. "HEY!" With all eyes on him once more, he returned his giant head to normal size while gulping. "I-I'll try again, a-and if this time it doesn't work, then we're probably dead." Nodding, Gramps took a brief moment before speaking.
"During an S-class quest, t-to survive, I-I drank my own pee." There was a heavy bout of silence as we all stared at Gramps in disgust; even I, who was forced to survive in a forest for seven years, hadn't resorted to anything as disgusting as that. 'I don't think drinking animal blood is that disgusting; I mean, at least it's filled with nutrients. Pee is just waste.'
"Accepted." As that mechanical voice rang out, Gramps slumped down. "I-I've kept that secret for 52 years. T-To think this is how it was revealed." "Fuck." As I mouthed those words, I glanced at the others, and they also seemed to understand, given their grave expression.
Only a secret on such a level would be accepted, not some half-assed secret, but a true one you'd carry with you till the grave.
"Fuck it! I'm going! Wakaba, you're next!" Macao walked out of the crowd, his gaze hardened as he pointed at Wakaba, who cursed; standing beside Gramps, he stared at the sky through gritted teeth.
"Alright, dammit! A-After getting drunk, I once slept with a femboy." The women hardly reacted, but for us, the men, we couldn't help but look at him in a new light. "Didn't know you swung that away. Were you at least a top?" "Argh!! Dammit, Vijeeter! Shut the hell up!"
While Macao looked like he was about to pull his hair out, Wakaba was next, and his secret caused us to gaze at him in disgust. "I-I was also drunk. W-When doing it with a sexy woman, s-she used a s-strap on."
I could at least respect Macao if he were a top, but willingly being a bottom? "With a strap on? Not a real cock? You just did it for the love of the game." Although I spoke softly, given that the guild was silent, everyone heard me. "C-COOPER!" Macao had to hold Wakaba back from lunging at me, not like he could've done anything to me even with my broken arm. "So, whose next?"
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Lol, y'all in for a TREAT tomorrow