[3rd POV]
Casual Geographic, a popular channel run by a young black man who talks through an earphone and had rapidly gained fame using his knowledge and blunt humor.
He had a total subscriber count of 4 million. And this YouTuber decided to post a video that went absolutely viral three days after Leo's Documentary Episode 4. Said video was addressing the new hype that was Leo.
The video was titled, 'Leo's current power level in the documentary'.
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{Video Starts)
"Leo's power level is just the newest online debate brought to you by people who have way too much time on their hands. And I'm no better because here I am, making a video about it," he said, appearing at the corner of the screen and true to his channel name, he was very casual about the whole thing.
"I'm making this video because this seemingly harmless debate had quickly turned from an innocent debate to a huge joke that I am not in on. What's clear is that on one side, there are people who are absolutely glazing this lion to the point that his 30 plus females never did. And on the other, there are people who hate on these takes for absolutely no reason," he said, the video began showing slides of clips from Leo's documentary.
"So in this video, we are going to talk about this issue you probably didn't even care about if you have an actual job. But just to make things clear, we are not talking about Leo in his prime or the old king Leo that you are probably familiar with if you follow the leaks that's more frequent than a baby with a diaper," he said and then the scene abruptly cut to an image of Leo in his absolute prime.
"Yeah, fortunately, I am not tasked with explaining this absolute monstrosity that looked more AI generated than ChatGPT. I've studied animal science for half my life now and even then, I am just as confused and completely flabbergasted as the kindergartener who watched this," he said.
"That shitstorm is for future me," he chuckled nervously, "But right now, we are going to talk about the watered-down version of this entity and talk about Leo in the current timeline of the documentary."
"Mind you, I say watered down only in comparison to his older self. What you are seeing now is a lion on steroids that The Rock had not even dreamt of. An absolute anomaly who decided to change animal science as a whole and piss on the line that separates reality from fiction," he said and then deadpanned at the camera while showing Leo from the recent documentary.
"Meet cute Leo, and I mean cute in his prime perspective. But this so-called cute creature is able to murk almost all the animals that roamed the planet and is currently the most dominant predator on the whole African continent," he said, showing different images of Leo covered so far by the documentaries.
"Lions in general are already disrespectful creatures. They don't just survive in the savannah, they run it like it was their criminal empire, and the only thing they are fighting with in the wild is themselves. Yes, while others are fighting for survival, lions are fighting themselves to get some pussy privilege and pee all over the land. Compare this to cheetahs, who gotta break the sound barrier to get food, and even after taking down prey, have to eat their food like a competitor in an eating contest before some hyenas or other predators steal their food. Or better yet, leopards who have to drag their food up a tree like it's a security deposit and hyenas who have to chew on bones for food."
"They're so dominant the whole ecosystem has decided to just leave them be to do whatever they want. If they have a Yelp page, it will just say 'Don't'. And here's where it gets disrespectful, they are already living tanks with claws but still decided, 'Hey, let's form a 10-member group and jump people.' Like bro, you are already an apex predator, why do you need a gang? That's like Mike Tyson joining a mosh pit just to feel something."
"They should probably take something from their equal counterpart, the tigers who actually live solitary. They hunt in groups, not because they have to, but because they can. Just to make sure no animal evolves the confidence to challenge them," he said, showing different clips of normal lions this time.
"And then there's this dude. A lion who decided to speedrun evolution and built himself like a final boss just because once upon a time, someone stole his tail," he said, showing a picture of Leo in comparison.
"The only thing I can think of when looking at this picture is that God be making anything," he said.
"The average lion weighs 200-250 kilograms, but this behemoth at the bright age of 3 weighs 360 kilograms. That's not a lion that's a sabre tooth with Wi-Fi. He is like your grandfather who had to walk both ways for a hundred miles just to get to school, reborn in the easy mode of modern life. He looks like he is from the veteran mode of Earth that decided to be born in the tutorial mode of the Earth. A lion that was meant to survive on Earth version ten times more difficult," he said with a shrug.
"His shoulders are so broad he makes Cape Buffalo look undersized. He has muscles in places where muscles don't even belong. I swear his neck alone could file taxes as a separate entity."
"Now that we've got accustomed to this final boss of lions. Let's talk about feats because that's really important to gauge his power levels. So far, we've seen Leo fold other lions like a bully who gets held back in the fourth grade five times. He changed the nickname of the Black Death to Black Dead by hunting them consistently and adding them into his diet like a bodybuilder adding more protein. He singlehandedly unalived three legendary lion kings like they were domestic cats. And hyenas? We have seen him consistently beating the shit out of mega clans like a game character farming XP on lower-level demons," he said.
"Now if these feats are not enough to impress you then seeing Diddy's lawyer getting him a sentence of only 50 months in prison probably wouldn't either."
"Leo looks like a complete beast but I would honestly argue that his feats even surpassed his looks. Even with all the shock brought by his appearance, he is still like Arnold with a sleeper build," he said.
"But still, the wildest part of all this is that Leo is still just 3 years old. That age is still considered the teenage years even for lions. But don't let his age and size fool you because you are looking at not just the biggest predator on the continent but also perhaps the fastest among them."
"And when I say fast, I mean acceleration. Because this is where Leo decided to disrespect the laws of physics and pretend gravity is not real. But don't get this messed up because his top speed is thankfully average for lions, around 50 miles per hour, maybe even a little lower. And that's expected when you are a cat the size of a grizzly bear."
"What's not expected though, is the ability to go from zero to top speed instantly. And when I say instantly, I mean under a second instantly or blink-of-an-eye instantly. When a normal lion goes from zero to top speed, it takes a couple of seconds. You see the build-up, the push-off, the lunge. Leo? Nah. He goes from zero to a missile of terror instantly. He's got the kind of acceleration where if you blink, the prey's already filing a missing report."
"In biomechanical terms, this comes down to his fast-twitch muscle fibres. Lions already have around 60–70% of those as they're built for explosive bursts, not endurance. But Leo's body composition is all gas, no brakes. His muscle density is higher, meaning his fibres contract harder and faster. That gives him crazy thrust power off the line. It's like watching a freight train hit the gas like a sports bike."
"Think about it this way, a normal lion takes about 1.5 seconds to hit 40 miles per hour. Leo does it under a second. That means his acceleration curve is closer to that of a cheetah, but with six times the body mass. So when he lunges, the amount of kinetic energy behind him is so ridiculous it's like getting hit by a small car. Not even joking, a 360-kilogram lion accelerating at that rate hits with over 11,000 joules of force. If that's not a superpower, I don't know what is."
He showed many clips of Leo hunting prey. These clips were not in the documentary per se but those that could be found on the website where raw footage is posted regarding Leo.
"You ever see a lion hit something so hard it looks like the prey got hit by lag?" he asked and then played the footage of Leo absolutely ragdolling an antelope after chasing it for only a few seconds.
"The more you know," he shrugged after showing that clip.
"Another reminder that Leo lost his tail at a young age, which means every ounce of his stability comes from sheer muscle coordination. His back, core, and hind legs are extremely overdeveloped to make all this movement possible. Imagine having no legs and still doing ballet better than anyone else on the planet. This is a direct result of the curious thing researchers had observed Leo do, that is to train," he said.
"Imagine being born as the apex predator and God making you one of the deadliest animals on the planet and yet you still choose to train to be more. That's exactly what he did ever since he was young. As a result, now he is built like a crime and there's nothing anyone can do about it," he said.
"Coupled with that speed with the bite force estimated to be triple that of other lions, you have yourself a murder cat that could run through all living beasts like it's a breeze. The only reason why you should sleep well at night knowing this nightmare-fueled creature shares the same planet is he's awfully fond of humans," he said.
The screen showed clips of Leo and the researchers interacting. It even showed some funny pictures of the humans as they posed in front of the camera.
"Believe it or not that is the only reason why Elon Musk has not found a way to migrate to Mars," he said with a shrug.
"We've seen the raw stats of this final boss and you might think the worst is over. You'd be wrong because the worst is yet to come, technique and intelligence. You could summarise what I've said so far as me describing the specs of a gun, but even a nuclear bomb is nothing at the hands of an infant. Who wields said power and weapon also holds a very big difference," he said.
"The most fortunate or most unfortunate part of all this is that such power is under the hands of possibly the smartest non-human creature that ever roamed the Earth. Leo is never defined by his size, speed, or build but it's always his intelligence that stands out even more than the rest."
"But luckily, those stuff are too much to cover in the same video so let's return back to the topic which is just sheer power scaling."
"In conclusion, 99 per cent of all living creatures are getting ran over by Leo in the current timeline. Other lions? That's like bullying a baby. Tigers? We need to prepare life support, the tiger might survive but never win. Crocodiles? Maybe their great-great-great-great grandfather who preyed on dinosaurs. Bears? Leo is just a bear with better speed, mobility, and instinct," he said.
"Realistically, the only thing that's beating Leo are the big three, hippos, rhinos, and elephants. And I don't want any of the glazers to say otherwise because that is delusional. Maybe you've let this image take you too far," he said.
Then the screen showed some sneak peeks of Leo standing over two dead, torn-open hippos and another image of a wounded Leo with a bloody face near a fallen rhino.
"Although the future holds possibilities, the current Leo that we see in the latest episode is still nowhere close to beating these giants."
"In conclusion, I would give Leo the power level of 9000 with 1000 being the absolute unit Elephant," he said.
The video ends.
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Author: This was only a good idea in mind, but doesn't work well on paper. Writing down the format of his videos was a nightmare and trying to copy his scripts and humour is even more challenging.
I don't think I would do this again.