On Promises and Goals
By Hikigaya Hachiman
People like to claim that promises and goals are what give life meaning.
Teachers say it, self-help books say it, and of course, my former classmates love to repeat it too, usually while pretending they're auditioning for a youth drama.
It's very moving—if you don't think about it for more than five seconds.
Unfortunately, I made the mistake of thinking.
The truth is simple: promises expire. They are spoken with confidence, recorded in yearbooks, or shouted dramatically at the school gates, only to be forgotten faster than yesterday's homework.
"We'll always stay friends,"
"I'll never give up,"
"We'll definitely meet again." Wonderful lines, really.
I'm sure they'd look great embroidered on a throw pillow. But in reality, they vanish the moment life becomes inconvenient.
Goals also suffer the same fate.
The "I'll be a novelist,"
"I'll travel the world,"
"I'll change society." Yes, those kinds of goals also get the same treatment.
But dreams don't explode in a dramatic burst of failure. They just… evaporate. Slowly. Quietly. Until one day, you realize your grand ambition has been replaced by the modest goal of catching the last train or finding a sale at the supermarket. Truly inspiring.
What makes this tragicomic process worse is how natural it feels.
Nobody wakes up and declares, "Today I will abandon my dreams!"
No, it happens gradually. Like rust.
Or like that one plant you swore you'd water but never did. By the time you notice, it's already dead, and somehow it feels like that's the way it was always meant to be.
…And yet, sometimes, even when everything's supposed to be forgotten, you remember.
A promise from years ago.
A goal you once swore mattered.
They pop up at the strangest times, like ghosts that refuse to stay buried. And for just a second, you wonder if maybe—just maybe—it's not too late to keep at least one of them.
Not that I'd recommend it. But still…
Well, in conclusion—because all essays need a conclusion, apparently—promises and goals are destined to be forgotten. That's reality.
But if anyone manages to keep even one of them, then congratulations. You've achieved what the rest of us couldn't: living in a fantasy.
Don't worry, it'll fade soon enough.
——————————————————————
I stood at the helm of the Going Merry, one hand gripping the wheel while the other rested on the handle of my sheathed Barbossa sword. The storm's rain pelted down relentlessly, each drop feeling like a tiny bullet against my face.
'This weather is absolutely miserable. And here I thought sailing into the most dangerous waters in the world would be the hard part.'
At least the new wheel is a massive improvement over that ridiculous whip staff, and the shipwrights were nice enough to keep the signature whip staff's head on the new helm's pedestal.
The ship bucked and rolled beneath my feet as I fought to keep her on course through the churning waves. The storm was testing our newly upgraded vessel, and so far, she was holding up admirably.
"OI! NAMI! THE LIGHTHOUSE IS DOWN!" Luffy's voice carried over the howling wind from where he dangled upside down from the ship's figurehead, his rubber body seemingly unaffected by the violent motion.
'Of course, he's treating this like a carnival ride. The same person who nearly got executed a few hours ago is now hanging from our bow in a storm, like it's perfectly normal.'
Nami stood on the bow deck, water streaming on her raincoat, but her expression was confident and professional.
"That's fine!" she called back to Luffy, her voice cutting through the storm with practiced authority. "That's normal with lighthouses! That's why you have a navigator!"
'Is it? Because having a competent navigator doesn't mean we can ignore basic safety protocols. Though I suppose in a world where rubber boys can survive being shot with cannons, lighthouse failures probably rank pretty low on the danger scale.'
Nami turned toward the rest of us, gesturing broadly despite the rain.
"Everyone, to the lounge! I have something important to discuss!" Then she looked directly at me.
"Hachiman, set the wheel!"
I pulled the setting lever, feeling the mechanism lock into place with a satisfying click. The ship would maintain her heading automatically now, though I made a mental note to check on it frequently.
Trusting your life to machinery was one thing, but trusting it during a storm while approaching the Grand Line was another level of faith entirely.
'From treasure hunting solo to being part of a crew meeting. Two years ago, the only person I had to worry about was myself, and that was a lot to handle in this bizarre world.'
Now I'm responsible for making sure five other people don't die horribly.
'How did my life become this complicated?'
I followed the others into the lounge, shaking the rain from my cloak with Hamon as I entered the warmth of the cabin.
The warmth hit me like a wall as I stepped inside, the contrast from the storm-lashed deck making me realize just how cold and wet I'd become.
Sanji was already bustling around the small kitchen area, preparing something that smelled suspiciously like hot cocoa.
"Nami-swan needs something warm after being out in that terrible weather," he declared, his eyes literally sparkling with hearts as he worked. "I'll have the perfect drink ready in just a moment!"
And there's Sanji's priority system in full display. The rest of us could be hypothermic for all he cares, but Nami getting a slight chill is a crisis requiring immediate action.
'The man's dedication to his romantic delusions is almost admirable.'
The amount of social suicide that man is committing every other minute is off the chart, it makes my middle school record look nice and healthy in comparison.
Usopp had settled into one of the chairs, but his attention was focused on Luffy rather than the approaching meeting.
"Hey, Luffy," he said, pointing at our captain's waist. "Is that a sash? When did you start wearing that?"
Our captain had sprawled across the other bench, and for the first time since I'd seen him, he actually looked... well, like a pirate.
'It is amazing what a piece of cloth can do to one's look'
"Shishishi! I look like a real pirate now, right?" Luffy grinned widely, his hand moving to rest on the custom flintlock I'd given him earlier.
The enthusiasm of a child with a new toy. Though I suppose in his case, the toy happens to be a weapon capable of leveling buildings.
"You looked like a pirate before," Nami pointed out with amusement. "What with the straw hat and the constant declaration about becoming Pirate King?"
"Yeah, but now I look like a COOL pirate!" Luffy insisted, striking what he probably thought was a dramatic pose.
'Oh, good. Luffy's discovered the concept of accessories. I'm sure this won't lead to any ridiculous fashion choices or misguided attempts to emulate pirate stereotypes.'
Most likely, it will…
"Why aren't you wearing yours like that, too, Usopp?" Luffy continued, tilting his head with genuine curiosity.
"Don't you want to look like a pirate?"
Usopp's hand moved unconsciously to the pistol in his bag, his expression was uncertain, caught between his pride in his slingshot skills and the practical reality of having additional weaponry.
"I... well, I'm not sure. I mean, I've always used my slingshot, and it is more powerful than a pistol, so..."
"But you look so plain!" Luffy protested. "Where's your pirate style?"
"I have style!" Usopp shot back defensively. "I have plenty of style! I'm the Great Captain Usopp, after all!"
"Then why are you hiding your weapon like you're embarrassed by it?" Zoro asked bluntly.
'Typical Usopp. Caught between wanting to look cool and his attachment to familiar equipment. Though to be fair, his slingshot skills are genuinely impressive.'
"You're a sniper, you shouldn't be picky with the tools you have, especially when you know pistols have their advantages at times," I said, settling into my own chair and fixing Usopp with a level stare.
'Like the fire rate, aim-and-ready speed, and even the firepower depending on your ammo type, just to mention a few.' There are a lot of reasons why I still use a pistol despite having other weapons and options.
"And look, even Zoro understands that."
I nodded toward the swordsman, who sat with his own pistol hanging on his sash alongside his three swords. He caught my gesture and shrugged with characteristic stoicism.
"In the heat of the battle, a weapon's a weapon," Zoro said simply. "Use whatever works." His eyes closed like he was delivering some words of wisdom.
From his words, you would think that the guy is an avid follower of the practical combat, however…
'You are still not going to use it, aren't you?'
For my eyes, his swordsman's pride is still radiating like some kind of fluorescent lighting.
"See?" Luffy said triumphantly. "Even Zoro knows how to look like a proper pirate!"
"I don't care about looking like anything," Zoro replied flatly. "But as I said, weapons are weapons."
Seeing the position of the swordsman, Usopp looked at his pistol for a long moment, his internal conflict playing out across his features.
Finally, he lifted it from where it had been tucked away and secured it to his sash carefully.
"You're right," he said, and there was a note of pride in his voice now. "A true warrior uses every tool at his disposal. The Great Captain Usopp fears no weapon!"
"Shishi! Now you look like one of us!" Luffy cheered.
"We all look ridiculous," Zoro muttered, but there was no real complaint in his voice.
'Progress. Sometimes all people need is permission to adapt, and nothing says that he can't make his own brand of upgrades.'
Sanji appeared at that moment with a tray of steaming mugs, moving with the showy movement that he most likely learned to entertain his customers.
'Though I think it was for the female customers only…'
Naturally, he presented the first cup to Nami with a flourish that would have made ballroom dancers weep with envy if it wasn't so over the top.
"For my beautiful navigator," he declared, his voice taking on that dreamy quality that the rest started learning to ignore. "Made with the finest cocoa and just a hint of cinnamon, perfectly suited to your exquisite taste!"
"Thank you, Sanji-kun," Nami said with a smile that made Sanji's knees wobble visibly.
"What about us?" Luffy asked, reaching for one of the remaining mugs.
"Yeah," Usopp added. "We're cold too!"
"Fine, fine," Sanji sighed, distributing the rest of the drinks with considerably—and thankfully—less ceremony. "But don't expect any special treatment."
Everyone had their drinks—mine was surprisingly good coffee, which suggested Sanji had been paying attention to my preferences.
"This is really good," I admitted, taking a sip of the hot coffee. "Thanks."
Sanji looked surprised by the compliment. "Oh... well, of course it is. I'm a professional."
'Progress on multiple fronts. Maybe we'll actually function like a real crew someday.'
"Alright, everyone," Nami said, unfolding a large chart across the central table. "Let me explain exactly where we're going."
"The entrance to the Grand Line," she announced,
"Is a mountain."
The reaction was immediate and predictable.
"A MOUNTAIN?!" Luffy shouted, nearly spilling his cocoa in excitement.
"A MOUNTAIN?!" Usopp echoed, his voice cracking with disbelief.
"A mountain," Zoro repeated slowly, as if testing the words for hidden meaning.
'Of course they're shocked. Most people don't expect to sail up mountains. Though in a world where giant sea creatures are commonplace and rubber boys fight smoke men, I suppose anything's possible.'
Nami nodded seriously, pointing to a distinctive marking on the chart.
"The Reverse Mountain, to be exact. I know it sounds impossible, but according to the map and the rumors I've heard, there's a waterway that will take us up the mountain, then down into the Grand Line."
"THAT'S SO COOL!" Luffy's eyes literally sparkled with excitement, as if someone had just told him about a new type of meat. "A mountain you can sail up! That's amazing!"
'Of course, Luffy would be thrilled by the prospect of sailing up a mountain. Danger and impossibility are apparently selling points for him.'
"Are you serious?" Usopp's voice cracked slightly. "Ships aren't supposed to go up mountains! That's... that's not how boats work!"
"If Nami-san says it's true, then it's absolutely true!" Sanji declared with the fervor of a religious convert. "Her brilliant navigational knowledge is beyond question!"
'The man would probably believe Nami if she told him the ocean was made of soup.'
"Sounds like nonsense to me. Water flows down, not up." Zoro looked skeptical, his arms crossed as he studied the chart.
'Okay, time to put an end to this before it devolves into a philosophy debate about the nature of gravity. We have work to do.'
"It's true," I said firmly, taking a sip of my coffee and letting my words carry the weight of experience. "It's common knowledge for seasoned sailors."
The effect was immediate. Five pairs of eyes turned to me with expressions ranging from curiosity to relief.
"Really?" Nami asked, sounding relieved. "You've heard of this before?"
"Wait, you actually know about this?" Usopp added, his skepticism warring with hope.
"It's actually common knowledge among seasoned sailors," I continued, taking another sip of the coffee. "Well, common knowledge if you've done any research on the Grand Line, anyway."
"You've seen it before?" Zoro asked, his tone carrying a note of genuine curiosity.
"No, but it's documented," I replied. "The reverse current phenomenon exists in several places around the world. There are books written about it, and I've read similar formations exist in the South Blue as well."
'Sometimes being the repository of random knowledge has its advantages. Especially when that knowledge prevents your crewmates from having existential breakdowns.'
"Oh! So, it's a normal thing! Like... really weird normal!" Luffy's face lit up with understanding.
"NO, IT'S NOT NORMAL YOU IDIOT!" Usopp protested, his voice climbing toward hysteria.
'Normal is relative, I suppose. In a world where people can stretch like rubber and turn into smoke, water flowing uphill probably does qualify as mundane.'
I sighed, gesturing toward the storm outside.
"Anyway, Reverse Mountain is part of the Red Line. We should be seeing it soon."
The words had barely left my mouth when Luffy bolted upright, nearly knocking over his chair in his excitement.
"The Red Line!" he shouted, already moving toward the door. "I want to see it!"
'And there he goes. The attention span of a goldfish.'
Moments later, his voice carried back to us over the storm.
"IT IS THERE! I CAN SEE THE RED LINE!"
The effect was electric. Everyone abandoned their drinks and rushed toward the main deck, and despite my better judgment, I found myself following.
What greeted us outside was a sight that defied comprehension.
'No matter how many times I see it, this never gets less impressive.'
The Red Line stretched across the horizon like a wall built by God. It rose impossibly high, disappearing into the storm clouds above, a wall-like continent standing vertically against the sky. The sheer scale of it made our ship—made everything—feel insignificant by comparison.
"Whoa..." Usopp breathed, his earlier skepticism forgotten in the face of such overwhelming grandeur.
"It's majestic," Nami whispered, her Cartographer's soul clearly stirred by the geographic wonder before us.
"It makes you feel small, doesn't it?" Sanji observed, his usual romantic dramatics replaced by genuine awe.
"That's... really something."
Even Zoro looked impressed, which was saying something for a man who treated most natural wonders with stoic indifference.
"AWESOME!" Luffy shouted from his perch on the figurehead. "It's huge! It's like the biggest wall ever!"
'The biggest wall ever. Such poetry. Such depth of observation.'
Sarcastic commentary aside, even I had to admit it was an impressive sight.
The Red Line wasn't just a geographic feature—it was a fundamental force that shaped the world's ocean currents, weather patterns, and the very nature of navigation itself. Standing before it was like confronting the architecture of the planet.
As we drew closer, I could feel the water currents growing stronger, pulling us toward our destination with increasing insistence.
"Fold the sails!" Nami called out, her voice carrying the authority of someone who knew exactly what she was doing.
"And Hachiman, don't lose control of the ship!"
'Don't lose control. Right. Because piloting a vessel with a supernatural ability, through supernatural water currents, toward a magical mountain waterway, all right in the middle of a storm is exactly the kind of low-pressure situation where maintaining control is easy.'
I moved back to the helm, one hand gripping the wheel while the other used the power of the Barbossa sword.
The Going Merry, as always, responded cooperatively to my will, but I could feel the currents fighting me, trying to push us off course toward the massive wall of stone.
Around me, the others scrambled up the rigging to fold the sails, their movements efficient despite the storm, completely different from the ragtag group that had started this adventure.
"Come on, Usopp!" Sanji called from halfway up the mainmast. "These ropes won't fold themselves!"
"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Usopp replied, struggling with the rigging. "This would be easier if the ship weren't trying to throw us around!"
"Stop complaining and climb!" Zoro ordered from his position on the foremast.
Usopp moved with surprising agility, while Zoro's swordsman training served him well in maintaining balance on the wet ropes. Sanji somehow managed to look like he was walking on a normal surface even while climbing through rigging in a downpour.
"I CAN SEE THE ENTRANCE!" Luffy's voice rang out from the bow. "There it is! The entrance to the Grand Line!"
And there it was. Through the sheets of rain and the growing darkness, I could see it—a gap in the Red Line where water flowed upward in defiance of every natural law I thought I understood.
The sight was both awe-inspiring and terrifying. Water cascaded upward like a reversed waterfall, disappearing into the clouds above like a liquid bridge to the sky.
'This is it. The point of no return. Once we go up that waterway, we're committed to whatever the Grand Line has waiting for us.'
"This is so cool!" Luffy shouted. "We're really going to sail up a mountain! I can't wait!"
"I can wait," Usopp muttered. "I can wait forever."
"Don't be a coward, Usopp!" Luffy called back. "This is going to be awesome!"
"I'm not a coward! I'm cautious! There's a difference!"
"FULL SPEED AHEAD!" Luffy commanded while ignoring Usopp's cowardly antics, his voice filled with the kind of absolute determination that had convinced me to join this crew. "HACHIMAN! DON'T MISS THE ENTRANCE!"
"Got it!" I called back, using every ounce of my ability to align our course with the entrance to the waterway.
The currents were incredibly strong now, fighting my attempts to steer with the power of a natural disaster.
The Barbossa sword's power flowed through the ship's frame, but even with supernatural assistance, keeping us on course required every bit of focus I'd trained over two years of sailing these waters.
'Alright, here we are. Two years of training, countless battles, supernatural abilities, and the finest crew I could ask for.'
If we can't handle sailing up a mountain, we have no business going to the Grand Line.
"HERE WE GO!" Luffy shouted, his laughter echoing off the stone walls around us.
The ship lurched as we hit the entrance current, and suddenly we were climbing. Actually climbing, the bow was pointing upward at an angle as water carried us up the face of Reverse Mountain.
"WOOOOOHOOOOO!" Luffy cheered, his arms stretched out like he was flying.
"THIS IS INCREDIBLE!" Nami shouted over the rush of water.
"I'M GONNA BE SICK!" Usopp wailed.
"DON'T YOU DARE!" Sanji yelled back.
Even Zoro looked exhilarated, his usual stoic expression cracked by genuine excitement.
The crew celebrated as we rose higher and higher, their voices mixing with the roar of the water around us. The walls of the waterway rushed past on either side, carved smooth by centuries of impossible currents.
'We're actually doing it. We're sailing up a mountain. In any sane world, this would be the most impossible thing that could happen to a person. In this world, it's just Tuesday.'
While the others focused on the waterway ahead, on the entrance to the Grand Line that awaited us, my attention, however, was drawn to the opposite side of the mountain.
There, barely visible through the clouds and distance, I could see the other side of the Red Line.
The dark waters that marked the end of the Grand Line—the place where our journey would eventually lead us, where the One Piece waited, and where my best hope of finding a way home lay hidden.
'It's there, somewhere, in those dark waters, past whatever hell the Grand Line puts us through.'
'My ticket home is waiting.'
The One Piece, the ultimate treasure that might just be ultimate enough to power a portal between worlds.
I knew it could be years before I saw those waters again. Knew that all the crews but one crew never made it that far.
But I'd learned patience in my two years as a treasure hunter. Being in a hurry was a good way to get yourself killed, and I'd come too far to die now.
So, like the rest of the crew, I turned my attention to the entrance of the Grand Line as we transitioned from the climbing current to the descent on the other side.
Through the clouds ahead, I could see blue water—the first glimpse of the sea that would test us in ways the East Blue never could.
As we transitioned from the climbing current to the downward flow, I felt the ship's orientation shift. We were no longer climbing toward an uncertain future—we were descending toward our destiny.
The blue water grew larger and clearer as we approached the base of the mountain's far side. The Grand Line spread out before us, mysterious and vast, promising adventure and danger in equal measure.
'Almost there. Just have to navigate this last bit without getting everyone killed, and then we're officially Grand Line pirates.'
[BUOOOOOOOOOOHH!!!!]
As we drew closer to the base of the mountain, a sound began to reach us over the roar of the waterway.
"Hm? Did you guys hear that?" Zoro asked in puzzlement.
"Probably just the wind," Nami said when Zoro pointed it out, completely overlooking the note.
At first, it was just a rumble, easily dismissed as wind or the echo of rushing water.
[BUOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!!!]
But when it echoed again, I wasn't entirely convinced of this explanation.
'Wind doesn't make sounds like that. That's something else entirely.'
[BUOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!!!]
As we descended further, the sound grew louder and more distinct.
"Nami-san! There is a mountain ahead!" Sanji exclaimed from the top of the main sail's yard.
"A mountain? That can't be! Once we pass the twin capes up ahead, we should reach the open sea!" Nami responded, she, too, was confused.
'I am getting a very bad feeling…'
It was hard to see through the fog of the clouds, but gradually we could see it.
And then we saw it.
'Oh, you've got to be kidding me.'
"THAT'S NO MOUNTAIN!!!"
[BUOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!!!]
"IT'S A FU*KING WHALE!!!!!!!!!!!"
A whale.
A whale the size of a mountain, floating in the Grand Line's entrance waters, its massive head pointed toward Reverse Mountain as it bellowed with a voice like thunder.
[BUOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!!!]
'Of course, there's a mountain-sized whale blocking our entrance to the Grand Line. Because apparently, sailing up a waterway wasn't challenging enough for this crew.'
The reaction from my crewmates was immediate and varied.
"WHAAAAALE!" Luffy shouted with the kind of excitement most people reserved for discovering buried treasure.
"That's not a whale!" Usopp screamed, his voice cracking with panic. "That's a sea monster! That's a living island!"
"Impossible," Zoro breathed, his hand instinctively moving to his swords as if three feet of steel could somehow be relevant against something the size of a small town.
"We're going to die," Nami said flatly, her navigator's skills apparently including statistical analysis of survival odds when faced with impossible marine life.
"If We Don't Do Anything Soon, We're Going To Crash!" Sanji exclaimed through the panic.
"Turn Left!" Zoro called out, pointing toward a gap between the whale and the Red Line. "There's Space To Get Around It!"
I shook my head, calculating angles and momentum with the part of my brain that wasn't screaming about the impossibility of our situation.
"We Can't," I replied grimly. "The current's too strong, and we're moving too fast. Even if we managed to make such a maneuver, we'll still collide with it."
'Momentum plus insufficient turning radius equals spectacular collision with mountain-sized marine life.'
"But We Have To Do Something!! Do You Have Another Plan?!" Zoro demanded, his voice tight with the strain of maintaining composure while hurtling toward certain doom.
I looked at the approaching whale, at our crew's expectant faces, at the impossible situation we'd found ourselves in, and made the kind of desperate decision that had kept me alive for two years in these waters.
'Shit, time to see if spontaneous plans work better when you have a crew to help execute them.'
I drew the Barbossa sword fully, feeling its power flow through the ship's frame as I took control of the sails.
"EVERYONE HOLD ON!!!" I shouted, channeling the sword's ability to manipulate the ship's rigging.
The sails unfurled in an instant, catching the powerful updraft created by our rapid descent. Instead of propelling us forward, they acted like a massive parachute, creating enough drag to slow our descent.
"What are you doing?!" Nami demanded.
"Hopefully not killing us all!" I replied.
"THAT'S NOT REASSURRRRRIIIIING!" Usopp wailed.
'Damn It! It is not enough!'
The current beneath us was still pushing us toward the whale with irresistible force. The ship began to lift from the water, caught between the downward pull of the current and the upward force of the wind-filled sails.
"TAKE OUT THE OARS!" I commanded, fighting to keep the ship stable as it was trying to perform physics-defying acrobatics in the air above the water.
"ROW BACKWARD! COUNTER THE CURRENT!"
"ARE YOU INSANE?!" Sanji protested even as he moved to comply. "ROW AGAINST A CURRENT THIS STRONG?!"
"DO YOU HAVE A BETTER IDEA?!" I shot back.
"FU*KING SHIT!!" he replied, but he was already grabbing an oar.
Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, and Usopp responded with the kind of efficiency that only comes from absolute desperation.
"OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"
Oars appeared from storage with miraculous speed, and suddenly everyone was rowing backward with the intensity of people whose lives depended on it.
'Because their lives do depend on it!! All of our lives depend on the next thirty seconds going exactly right!!!'
We were slowing down, but…
"IT IS USELESS!! THIS ISN'T WORKING AT ALL!" Usopp panted, his arms already burning from the effort.
"WE'RE STILL GOING TOO FAST!!"
"KEEP ROWING!!" Zoro ordered through gritted teeth.
"MY ARMS ARE GONNA FALL OFF!!" Usopp complained.
"BETTER THAN YOUR WHOLE BODY FALLING OFF!!" Sanji replied.
We were slowing down, but not enough. The whale was getting larger and larger—if that was even possible—and I could see individual scars and markings on its massive hide.
"It's got scars," Luffy observed with interest. "Big ones. I wonder how it got them."
"WHO CARES ABOUT ITS SCARS?!" Usopp screamed. "WE'RE ABOUT TO BECOME WHALE FOOD!"
"Ah, do whales eat people?" Luffy asked curiously.
"I DON'T WANT TO FIND OUT!"
'Shit! Need something else, need another option, need—'
The anchor.
I reached out with the Barbossa sword's power, seizing control of our ship's anchor with desperate precision.
Instead of dropping it toward the water, I launched it sideways toward the rocky wall of the waterway.
'This is either going to save us or kill us all in a completely different way.'
But desperate times call for desperate measures.
"What are you doing now?!" Nami demanded.
"Something stupid!" I replied honestly.
"I KNEW IT!" Usopp cried.
"HOLD ON!" I screamed.
"TO WHAT?!" Sanji yelled back.
"ANYTHING!"
CLANG!
The anchor caught on an outcropping of rock, and suddenly we went from a controlled descent to a violent swing.
The chain went taut with a sound like a gunshot, and our forward momentum transformed into a wild arc that carried us sideways through the water.
"AAAAHHHHHHH!" came the collective scream from everyone, even Luffy, who usually enjoys these situations.
'Hold together, Merry. Hold together just a little longer.'
The sensation was like having the world's most violent brake applied at exactly the right moment.
Our forward rush toward the whale became a controlled swing to the side, bleeding off momentum with each degree of rotation.
We came to rest with the gentlest possible contact—the ship's side barely brushing against the whale's massive flank with all the force of a butterfly landing on a mountain.
"Are we..." Usopp whispered, "Are we alive?"
"I think so," Sanji replied, sounding surprised.
'Yeah. Somehow, against all odds and common sense, we're actually alive.'
"WHEW!!!!!"
We all exhaled in unison, the sound of collective relief mixing with the whale's continued bellowing. I quickly used the sword's power to retrieve the anchor and then filled our sails with controlled wind.
"ROW!" I called out, wanting to put distance between us and the mountain-sized marine life before anything else could go wrong.
'Get away from the whale. Get away from the wall. Get into open water where we can at least pretend to have some control over our situation.'
Zoro, Sanji, and Usopp responded instantly, grabbing oars and rowing with renewed energy as our sails caught the wind. We moved around the whale's massive bulk, our ship gaining speed with each passing moment.
'Just get clear. Just get into the Grand Line proper and then we can figure out what to do about—'
BANG!
The sound of gunfire cut through the air like a thunderclap, and I turned in horror to see Luffy standing at the bow, his custom pistol smoking in his hands.
'He…didn't…Please…someone tell me he didn't just—'
KABOOOMMM!!!
The Mini Bazooka Round struck the whale's eye with spectacular force, creating an explosion that lit up the massive creature's face like a firework.
'HE FREAKING DID!!!!!!!!!!'
The rubber-brained idiot actually shot at a mountain-sized whale with an explosive round.
"YOUUUU!! DUMBAAAAAAAAAAASSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Our scream of horror was probably audible from the next island.
But our Captain was just getting started. Standing at the bow with his pistol still in his hand, Luffy glared at the whale with the righteous indignation of someone who'd been personally wronged.
"YOU BASTARD!!! HOW DARE YOU JUST STAND THERE!!!!" he shouted, his voice carrying across the water with impressive volume.
"YOU ALMOST DESTROYED OUR SHIP WITH YOUR BIGASS FACE! MOVE OUT OF THE WAY DAMN IT!!!"
'This is it. This is how we die. Not from the storm, not from Marines, not from the dangers of the Grand Line, but because our captain decided to pick a fight with something the size of a mountain.'
The whale's massive eye—completely unharmed by the explosion, as I'd known it would be—snapped toward our ship.
Toward us.
Toward the tiny collection of puny humans who had just had the audacity to shoot it in the face.
'Well, it's been an interesting two years. I learned valuable lessons about the nature of courage, camaraderie, and the inadvisability of following rubber-powered lunatics into obviously dangerous situations.'
The whale's eye fixed on our ship with what I could only describe as focused attention.
'Goodbye, family. I hope you'll understand that I died trying to get home to you, even if the method involved sailing up a mountain and getting killed by marine life the size of a city.'
And in that moment, as a creature large enough to swallow buildings whole turned its attention to our tiny vessel, I found myself thinking the same thing I'd been thinking since the day I'd arrived in this world.
'Why is it never simple?'
…
A/N: Well, That's it for Today.
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