"This is fucking stupid, like when am I going to need to use calculus in my life?"
"Why don't you just shut the fuck up and let everyone study."
"Excuse me?!"
"God, being a student sucks."
"Shut your goddamn mouth, you over-bedazzled giraffe, you still have this year left."
"One year left means I'm closer to graduation than you shorties."
Obanai saw red, already slamming his pencil down, ready to lunge at the annoying, flamboyant individual until,
"Obanai," The softest voice he would ever hear and cherish spoke, a gentle hand placed on his arm. "We have to finish this project for our final grade, I'm sure Uzui will resume studying in his own time," Mitsuri finished, the yellow and green-eyed teen immediately sitting back down.
'Fucking whipped,' Uzui thought as he smirked in victory, but not without receiving a side eye death glare from Obanai.
"Mitsuri is correct, Uzui," A loud voice rang throughout the room, Uzui sighed because he knows his best friend would chime in and say that. "We have to prepare for graduation and university preparation, and with that comes solidified final grades that reflect our persistence and dedication!"
Uzui looked over at his friend who was sitting straight up on the floor, arms crossed while his fiery red and yellow eyes shined with determination, "Ugh fine, I guess, what's du-"
"But first," Rengoku interrupted, causing the group to sigh. "With studying comes incentives, I have brought several snacks for us to enjoy while expanding our knowledge!"
Everyone thanked the flame-haired male, but Mitsuri seemed the most excited about the statement, "Ah Rengoku, you're too kind," She exclaimed, clasping her hands together in excitement, of course not without a specific person taking notice.
"Of course! I brought a variety of foods enough for everyone, including your favorites, Mitsuri," Renogku announced once more. "Enjoy!"
'This is the worst,' The green and yellow-eyed boy thought to himself, hunched over an outline of his and Misturi's final project. Looking to the side, receiving a somewhat concerned, yet annoyed look from his best friend, Sanemi. Obanai shook his head, defeat written across his face, before returning to their work.
"I'll go get them," Sabito got up from the table where he was sitting. "They're in the kitchen, right?"
"Correct, Giyuu and Shinobu went to retrieve them not too long ago," Rengoku recalled, Sabito nodding before entering the kitchen area.
"They're taking forever," Sanemi groaned in frustration, both from the school work and being hungry. "The fuck are they doing back there?" Obanai looked over at his friend, thinking to himself.
"Ah, Sanemi," Kanae chimed in, placing a hand on the other's arm, "Shinobu went back there to help Giyuu with unpacking and preparing the snacks, I'm sure they'll be out any second with Sabito," She spoke softly, Sanemi taking a deep breath to regain his composure, Obanai not missing a beat.
Mitsuri turned to Kanae in excitement, almost as if she just remembered something, "I forgot to ask, Kanae…"
Meanwhile in the kitchen in the room next over…
"I don't know about this, Shinobu, I-"
"Oh, hush, he'll love it," She gushed. "Besides, Sabito and I are done listening to your angsty playlist coming from your room every day you pine over him."
Giyuu's eyes went wide, face flushing in embarrassment yet still trying to maintain his fleeting composure, "T-there's...everyone's out there, isn't it best to wait to give these to him in private?"
"What is taking so long?" The peach-haired teen pushed through the kitchen door, looking down at the tray of round, chocolate-colored desserts Giyuu was carrying in his hands, then looking over at the snacks that are still in their grocery store plastic bags sitting on the counter. "You mean to tell me you've been in here making ohagi while all of us have been starving outsi-"
Shinobu slapped a hand over Sabito's mouth to silence him, determination in her eyes, "Our boy is about to finally grow a pair and confe-"
"Shinobu, do you know this thing called being quiet especially since everyone is literally 20 feet away from us in the next room?" Giyuu asked, completely frustrated, his anxiety about the whole situation growing. "I really don't think I can do this."
Sabito removed the hand covering his mouth, "Giyuu, you've been pining over Sanemi for how long? Almost two years?" The black-haired teen's face flushed further with the question as his best friend continued, "We're here to support you, whether you want to do this now or not,"
Shinobu's demeanor changed to one more comforting, "Sabito's right, I didn't mean to seem like I was rushing you," She apologized and continued. "I feel bad because although your annoyingly pining and angsty self does get frustrating for us to watch from the sidelines, I don't want you to feel distressed anymore about this whole ordeal," She looked at Sabito for reassurance, Sabito nodding for her to continue. "Besides, I've talked to Mitsuri and she says that Sanemi actually talks about you a lot."
Giyuu was a scarlet tomato at this point, his facial expression unwavering while his friends continued to shower their support, "And Obanai says the same thing," Sabito chimed in. "Sure, he says sometimes Sanemi talks about how he gets frustrated that you're so quiet and distant, but hey, that means he's thinking about you, right?"
Shinobu nodded along, "But if anything, you can just deliver the ohagi and confess to him off to the side and let him know you made the ohagi specifically with him in mind since you knew it's his favorite dessert,"
"You watch too much shoujo anime," Sabito mumbled as both waited for Giyuu's answer.
Giyuu held a tight grip on the tray of homemade ohagi before sighing, "Alright, I'll go," Shinobu gasped excitedly. "But can you walk out there with me? I don't want to feel awkward holding this random tray of ohagi like this was all we were doing back here."
"I mean, it is all you two were doing, the snacks are still in the ba-"
"Of course," Shinobu spoke happily as she smacked Sabito upside the head, shutting him up.
Rubbing the back of his head, Sabito glared at the black and purple-haired individual, "Shinobu and I will carry the bags of food out right behind you."
Giyuu nodded as he clutched the tray in his hands, turning towards the door to walk out into the living room where everyone was. Shinobu was correct that Giyuu had been extra angsty these last couple of months since he's accepted his feelings for the silvered-haired male, she knew he was serious about his feelings when she told him, 'Normally your eyes are really dead but whenever he comes into the room it's like watching water exposed to an intense sound and bass, you're all over the place.' Sabito was also correct on how long he's had feelings for Sanemi, but he was always afraid to speak his truth. God, he hated how inarticulate he was, he could never express himself the way he wanted to and even now he can feel his tongue getting tied and nothing has even happened yet.
To be honest, he wasn't even sure if Sanemi would recuperate his feelings, but there were times when it was just them two and there would be things that would happen that just didn't make sense to Giyuu, like sitting so close that there would be no space between the two when there would be plenty of space to sit. Or demonstrating certain formations in school sports which would give Giyuu a minor heart attack especially when he would show him proper baseball forms while standing behind him. Or defending him against bullies who try their luck against him. God, Sanemi could tear someone apart with just a gaze and Giyuu had seen that firsthand when it came to those situations where he would defend him against said bullies, of course, it would end with Sanemi getting frustrated with Giyuu for letting people say whatever they wanted to him.
Or the time he remembers so perfectly when the pair were assigned a project and since he was a perfectionist he had skipped almost every meal that day. Sanemi apparently found out and brought him salmon daikon leaving Giyuu completely surprised especially since he had never told the other that salmon daikon was his favorite food so that meant he had asked either Shinobu or Sabito what he liked to eat. Sanemi sat with him like nothing had happened but Giyuu just felt like he had been transported to a whole other universe.
He didn't want to read too much into any of the situations, but at this point it became overwhelming. He couldn't help it, he had never felt this overflowing feeling before and finally understood those stupid shoujo anime shows Shinobu and Mitsuri watched when the character came to terms with their feelings and its become too overpowering for them, he didn't even feel this with the person he liked before.
But now was the time, he didn't want to continue sitting in his room listening to sad-ass music while wondering if there would ever be a possibility for them two. God, he was nervous as hell, if his anxiety was in a gauge it would've overflowed and exploded by now. He looked over at Sabito and Shinobu who had their hands and arms full carrying the bags of snacks and sweets Rengoku generously bought. Both gave him a nod in reassurance, he was so grateful to have them as his closest friends.
He took a deep breath, turning to walk out and-
"I forgot to ask, Kanae, how long have you and Sanemi been together?"
'What?'
Giyuu stopped dead in his tracks, then pulled himself back into the kitchen so quickly he bumped into his friends along the way, nearly dropping the tray of ohagi. Sabito and Shinobu looked at Giyuu in confusion, "Giyuu, what-"
"Ah, congrats to you both, you and Sanemi are cute together!" Mitsuri squealed.
Sabito and Shinobu perked up, both as confused as their friend. Sabito looked to his friend, "Giyuu-"
"Hey Sabito, do you have the snacks? I need to carbo-load before going to the gym later!" Uzui exclaimed. The peach-haired boy looked back at Giyuu who was still frozen in place, Shinobu handed Sabito the bags, both giving each other a nod in understanding. Clearing his throat, Sabito walked back out, "Calm down, you oversized gym rat, they're right here."
Shinobu made sure the door was completely closed before looking back towards her friend, reaching out, "Giyuu-"
"Did you know?"
Shinobu almost didn't catch the question from how quiet the black-haired teen spoke, "Wha-"
"Did you fucking know?" Giyuu snapped, his eyes snapped up to meet hers. "Is that why you were so determined to have me do this now? To make me look like an idiot?"
"Giyuu, what? No, absolutely not!" She rebuked. "I didn't know anything about this, I didn't even know Kanae liked Sanemi that way," She insisted. Giyuu reluctantly listened as she continued, "She tells Kanao and me everything and she never mentioned anything about him. I mean, I knew she talked about him sometimes but it seemed like any teen girl infatuation, I never thought it would…unless maybe Sanemi, he…" Her voice trailed off, "Giyuu, I-"
The raven-haired male stood up straight before handing her the tray, "You can take it out," He stated, Shinobu looking at him in confusion, "Giyuu, you can still-"
"I don't want to, there's no point, you can take it,"
Shinobu could've sworn his eyes returned to a hallowed state, but there was a hint of something else there…something that resembled bitterness and heartache. She took the tray without debate, her eyes apologetic, "I...I'm sorry, Giyuu, I really didn't know. You know I would've told you if I did, you're one of my best friends and I would've never put you in one of those situations."
Facing the door, she took a deep breath before putting on her trademarked smile before walking out, "I have a surprise!" She exclaimed, rushing out to the living room with the tray, an excited Mitsuri squealing.
"Thank God, this woman already took horde of half of the snacks already."
"Ah, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"
"Uzui, shut your mouth and go take your steroids or something, you're not even eating anything, Mitsuri can eat as much as she wants."
As the commotion ensued, the voices became incomprehensible to Giyuu who was still standing in the same place. His hands gripping the counter behind him, taking deep breaths in an attempt to regain his composure.
He didn't want to cry,
'Don't cry'
Crying was pointless,
'Do not cry'
It wouldn't change anything,
'Just stop'
It's stupid,
'You're stupid for thinking you had a chance'
He brought his hand up to his face, a single tear trailing down,
'Why did you have to-'
All of Giyuu's thoughts were cut off when the door to the kitchen opened suddenly, gasping internally, he quickly turned his back and faced the kitchen sink.
Sanemi stopped in his steps looking at the other, "Uh, hey,"
'Damn it, why now?'
"Uh, hey," Giyuu managed to respond, his voice almost ragged as he attempted to keep himself together. "Did we forget one of the snack bags or something?"
"Ah, no," Sanemi walked over to the fridge. "Rengoku said he had some water bottles left in the fridge, I was just looking to grab one." He turned back to look at Giyuu who was still facing the sink, not responding, "Um, are you okay?"
'Please just..stop caring'
"Uh, yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Giyuu tried to sound perfectly fine, completely ignoring the ache in his chest.
Sanemi leaned against the countertop, tossing the water bottle between his hands, "Well, you've been in here for God knows how long, and when asked, Shinobu said you're not feeling well, so I was only wondering."
'God, why can't you just leave, please'
"Ah, well, she's overreacting," Giyuu lied. "It's just her medical expertise talking."
The white-haired male wasn't convinced but didn't want to pry. Instead, Giyuu was met with silence until he heard footsteps walk toward him, tensing up for whatever was to come.
From his side view, he saw the other's hand come into view, setting the water bottle directly next to him.
"I know you have a stupid tendency to forget your own health so here," Sanemi spoke up, placing the bottle down. "It's the last one but it's fine, you can have it."
'Why…'
"And if you aren't feeling well, then maybe you should head home," He continued as he headed back outside. "You probably just shouldn't stay out late, you know, for your health and stuff."
The door closed quietly behind him, leaving Giyuu to return to his silence, now staring at the water bottle.
This time he couldn't stop his tears and he hated it,
He hated this feeling, his stupid fucking feeling in his chest,
'Why did you always have to be there?'
His heart felt like it tightening from the inside,
'Why did you care so much?'
He wished he could rip his heart out if it meant this pain would stop,
He wished he could make his feelings disappear with a snap of a finger,
'This hurts so much,'
But that would be too easy,
'Why...why would you...I thought you felt...'
Acceptance, he knew that's what he had to do; accept the reality even if it hurts him in the process, but…
He laughed dryly, almost pained as he wiped any remnants of tears away,
'I really thought you felt the same way...how fucking stupid...'