There were only a few days left before exams. So Jisoo told himself he couldn't afford to cry. Couldn't afford to break down. Couldn't even afford to feel sad.
He took leave before exams so he could avoid Seungmin. Avoid the classroom. Avoid the empty looks. Avoid the guilt sitting in his chest like a stone.
He tried to study every day, forcing himself to focus on formulas and definitions. He stopped eating properly. Sometimes he skipped meals completely. Because somewhere in his mind he kept thinking he didn't deserve food. Not after what he had done to his own life. Not after volunteering to become someone's pawn.
When hunger twisted painfully inside him, he didn't eat. He lay down and forced himself to sleep. Sleep was easier than chewing. Sleep was quieter than thinking.
But even when he closed his eyes, nothing stopped.
Every word.
Every look.
Every rejection.
It replayed in his mind like a broken tape.
I don't love you anymore.
The sentence wouldn't fade.
The Princess noticed everything.
She didn't ask questions. She didn't intrude. But she watched.
She saw how his cheeks were hollowing. How his hands trembled slightly when he held a pen. How he stared at books without blinking.
She didn't know how to cook properly, but she tried. She burned noodles once. The second time they were too salty. Still, she carried the bowl to his room softly.
"Oppa… eat a little."
He would say, "Later."
And later never came.
She would take the bowl back when it turned cold.
After a week, their mother came home early one evening.
She cooked properly for the first time in days. Rice. Soup. Side dishes. The smell filled the small house.
"Princess! Jisoo! Come eat!"
Princess came immediately.
Jisoo came too, but he didn't sit.
"Mom, I'm not hungry."
He didn't even look at the table. He turned and left.
Their mother didn't stop him. Didn't ask why. Didn't notice the way his shoulders looked thinner.
Princess stared at her brother's back.
To her, he looked like someone who hadn't eaten for days. Like someone carrying something heavy inside his chest.
Anger burned in her throat.
She took one spoon of rice.
Suddenly it tasted bitter.
"I'm full," she said, standing up.
Their mother's face changed instantly.
"You ungrateful children!" she shouted. "I work so hard, and I still come home to cook and clean, and this is what I get?"
Princess already had her headphones on. She walked to her room and turned up the music until the shouting became muffled noise.
But Jisoo didn't even own a phone.
He couldn't drown anything out.
So he stepped outside.
The night air was cold, but at least it was quiet.
Behind him, his mother's voice only grew louder.
Jisoo was definitely suffering at home.
But school wasn't any easier.
Seungmin finally returned to school.
Because Jisoo was on leave, there were no shared lunches. No basketball practice. No accidental meetings in hallways.
Han kept asking Seungmin every day, "Do you want to go to the café?"
Every time, Seungmin refused.
Han was angry at what Seungmin had done that day in class. Angry at being called annoying. But strangely, it felt like Seungmin was the one avoiding him. when it should've been the other way around.
One day during lunch break, the classroom emptied.
Seungmin stayed seated.
Han walked up to him.
"Let's go to the café."
"No."
Han's patience snapped. "What's wrong with you? Why are you acting like this? I know we're not 'friends' like you said, but we're at least classmates. Why are you avoiding me?"
Seungmin stayed calm. Too calm.
He looked at Han like none of this mattered.
"Han," he said quietly, "are you acting like we're close? Just because I shared my lunch with you?"
Han's chest tightened.
"I did that because I felt bad for you. No one liked you. But now I understand why everyone avoided you."
He paused.
"You're annoying."
Han felt the words physically.
His eyes filled immediately. His voice disappeared.
"I… annoyed you?"
He swallowed hard. "Why didn't you tell me before? I would've stopped. I'm sorry for being annoying. I'm sorry you had to tolerate me."
Then he walked out.
It was the first time Seungmin avoided eye contact completely.
He stared at the desk.
His fingers pressed into his palm.
He didn't want to see Han's face fall.
But this was safer.
Distance meant protection.
They stopped talking after that. Completely.
And exams began.
Jisoo returned on the first day.
Everyone poured their heart and soul into the papers. Even Han and Chahyuk studied seriously.
Han was the only one who noticed Jisoo looked weaker.
His uniform hung slightly loose. His lips looked dry. His eyes had dark circles.
After every exam, Jisoo left immediately.
So the next day, Han finished early and waited outside the classroom.
When Jisoo came out, Han walked straight to him and casually placed an arm around his shoulder.
"Let's go eat something."
"I'm not hungry," Jisoo replied softly. "I'll eat at home."
Han thought for a moment.
"Okay. Just come with me. I don't want to be alone."
Jisoo didn't argue. He followed.
Han ordered for two without asking.
When the food arrived, he pushed a plate in front of Jisoo.
Jisoo gently pushed it back. "Hanna, I'm not hungry."
Han narrowed his eyes.
He didn't argue.
He simply scooped a spoon of rice and suddenly put it into Jisoo's mouth.
If it had been anyone else, Jisoo would've reacted sharply.
But it was Han.
There was something disarming about him. Something soft.
Jisoo swallowed.
Han fed him again.
And again.
On the third spoon, Jisoo grabbed the utensil. "I can do it."
Han smiled in satisfaction.
"Jisoo… why aren't you eating? Are you worried about exams?"
Jisoo took a deep breath.
"I'm messed up."
Han blinked. "Like… messed up really bad?"
"Kind of."
Han leaned back dramatically. "Ohhh. So did someone get killed?"
Jisoo stared at him. "Not really."
"Then it's not that bad," Han nodded seriously. "At least no one is dead."
Jisoo almost laughed.
"Han… you're so innocent. I wish you never have to face anything bad. Stay like this."
He couldn't stop looking at him.
Tears formed in his eyes before he could control them.
Han noticed.
He gently patted Jisoo's head.
"Jisoo, you're doing so well. Don't be so hard on yourself. I've always seen people depend on you. But don't carry everything alone. If you ever need someone… let me be the first person you depend on. Even if I can't fix it. I'll listen."
Something inside Jisoo broke.
Without thinking, he leaned forward and hugged Han tightly.
He buried his face in Han's shoulder and started crying silently.
Han hugged him back immediately, one hand on his back, the other patting his head gently.
"It's okay," Han whispered. "It's okay."
And for the first time in weeks, Jisoo let himself cry in someone's arms instead of alone in the dark.