"Chisaaa~"
"What do you want now…"
Chisa eyed the trio warily. They'd been acting extra sketchy today.
But Iori's next move completely defied her expectations—instead of saying something stupid, he just… handed her a gift box?
"Sorry it's late, but… here."
Chisa took it, baffled. Was today even a special occasion?
"Wow… is that a present?"
Aina watched enviously. She couldn't remember the last time she'd gotten a gift.
"So nice…"
Even though she knew Iori and Chisa weren't a couple, seeing this still made her chest ache.
But her sadness didn't last long—
Because Iori handed her a box too.
"There's one for Makeup Zombie Beast too."
"Huh?!"
Blushing, Aina accepted it.
"Th-Thank you, Iori!"
"Don't mention it. Consider it thanks for always putting up with us."
Iori waved coolly as he walked away, like some anime heartthrob.
(づ︶ど)
Aina's face burned even hotter. Excited, she tore open the box to see what her crush had given her—
Rustle, rustle…
As the wrapping fell away, a maid outfit stared back at her.
"..."
Aina's vision darkened.
What the hell?! Why a maid outfit as a "thank you"? Did he see her as some kind of servant?!
No—
This had to mean something else.
Then, she remembered a magazine article: If a guy gives a girl clothes, it means he wants to see her wear them.
Which meant—
Iori wanted her to put this on… for him?!
POOF!
Aina's face erupted into steam.
T-This is too fast! We're not even dating, and he's already into cosplay?!
Embarrassing as it was… if Iori really wanted it…
(〃∀〃)
Eeeeeek!
BANG!
Aina's fantasy shattered as a deafening crash came from behind her.
Chisa had slammed her fists on the table, her expression darker than a vengeful spirit's.
Then, she stormed toward Iori's room.
Confused, Aina peeked at Chisa's gift box—
…A lace-embroidered, see-through thong lay inside.
"..."
Aina immediately revised her earlier theory.
No. Absolutely not.
If this was the logic, she'd cry herself to sleep.
(╥﹏╥)
Meanwhile, in Iori's room…
Chisa was holding a frying pan, ready to bash Iori's skull in.
What kind of pervert gives someone that as a gift?!
"W-Wait, Chisa! Let me explain!"
"Any last words?"
"There's a reason for this!"
"So… no last words. Got it."
"NO, LISTEN TO M— AAAAAAH!!!"
BAM! BAM! BAM!
SNAP~
Shiro happily snapped photos of this real-life battle royale.
Truly, a thrilling spectacle.
Iori's head had swollen to pig-like proportions.
"Rest in peace, Iori. Your sacrifice won't be forgotten."
(At least the maid outfit delivery was a success.)
Honestly, Shiro hadn't expected Iori to have such a talent for self-destruction.
What kind of person gives their cousin lingerie?!
"This isn't a doujin, you idiot."
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
"…Yeah, you totally deserved this."
Eventually, Chisa exhausted herself and paused for breath.
Seizing the chance, Shiro explained the real reason behind the "gifts."
"So, yeah… that's the situation. Got it?"
(After all, more allies meant better odds—and Chisa was way more reliable than Iori or Kouhei.)
Iori, with a swollen pig-head-like face, spoke with difficulty, his gaze sluggishly fixed on Chisa. That girl really hadn't held back just now.
Chisa nodded obediently after understanding the full story. If that's how it was, then the plan didn't seem to have any issues—but…
"Why did you give me a pair of panties?"
If she was just a bonus part of the plan, then why give her anything so specific?
( ?° ?? ?°)╯
"Because I promised to give them to you a long time ago!"
"…"
Chisa remembered now. Ages ago, this idiot had said he wanted to thank her and planned to gift her a pair of lewd panties.
The problem was—
"I never agreed to that, okay?!"
Turns out, those punches she delivered earlier were totally justified!
"Well, if you don't want them, I'll just get rid of them."
Beside them, Kamishiro took out his phone and began to operate it after hearing Chisa's response.
"Get rid of them? How?"
Chisa looked confused. Was this guy planning to give them to some girl he was seeing? That'd be way too scummy!
"Of course I mean selling them online. These things are actually worth quite a bit."
Kamishiro turned his phone screen toward the trio so they could see.
"Auction! Authentic Lewd Panties!"
Below the title were two photos: one showing the panties, and the other a censored image of Chisa with her eyes covered.
Most shocking of all—
Kamishiro had set the starting bid at 10,000 yen?!
What kind of sucker pervert would actually pay for something like that…
(???)
"You'll definitely be misunderstood if you post that," Chisa complained. Even though she technically did nothing, she felt like she'd lost something important.
"Come on, don't get hung up on the details. The photo's blurred, no one will recognize you. If it sells, you get a 10% cut!"
"…"
Chisa silently agreed. Thinking it over, it wasn't really hers anyway. Earning 1,000 yen for nothing wasn't bad.
"Oh right, this method actually works!" Iori suddenly exclaimed, clenching his fist and hitting his palm. This auction stuff could be a great way to raise money!
(′｀;)?
"What? You got something valuable to sell? Fair warning—if it's labor, you'd need a body like this."
Kamishiro pulled up another auction listing.
"20-Year-Old Male College Student! No smoking or drinking, powered like a small electric motor! Starting at 20,000 yen!"
There was even a body photo attached.
While not as ripped as Senior Kotobuki or Senior Tokita, this guy was clearly better built than Kitahara. And quite the bargain—only 20,000 yen.
{{(°△°; "}}!
The trio was stunned, double-checking the phone. Wait, you could auction this kind of thing in Japan now?!
"This has to be an unregulated site!"
"Who the hell auctions themselves online?!"
"…"
The three were thrown off completely. This was way outside their realm of experience. Was this what the real world was like?
"Geez, don't overthink it. How many auction sites in Japan are actually regulated anyway? And don't be so dirty-minded. It's not always what you think."
"Then explain this 20,000 yen thing!"
╮( ??ω?? )╭
Kamishiro shrugged. "It's just what it says. I even tried it once."
Boom!
The confession hit them like a thunderclap. Iori and Kohei recoiled as if struck by lightning.
"…"
Kamishiro rolled his eyes. "I told you not to assume the worst! Even if you two swung that way, I wouldn't do anything. He just helped me buy a ticket, that's all."
"Buy a ticket?"
The trio looked puzzled. What was that supposed to mean?
"Yeah. I had him line up to buy concert tickets. Then I resold them for a profit. It's a way to make a little cash."
Kamishiro explained his scalping side hustle matter-of-factly. But it was slow money, with high costs—not ideal.
As for doing it on a bigger scale…
He wasn't ready to risk a prison sentence for pork cutlet rice just yet.
"Of course, most people do it for what you're thinking. The most popular listings are pretty boys."
Kamishiro fiddled with his phone again and pulled up a new auction listing.
This time, it was a handsome male college student with a starting price of 30,000 yen.
Iori and the others were numb. As law-abiding citizens, this was too much for them to handle.
Sure, the erotic industry might be legal in Japan, but this kind of auction? Wasn't that illegal? Didn't these people fear the police?
"If it were Aina… college student, pure image, plus…" Kamishiro calculated. "Could probably get 100,000 yen?"
Pow!
Kamishiro was immediately hit with a righteous punch.
"Absolutely not!"
"That's still selling yourself!"
"Selling your body is not something to be encouraged!"
The three immediately shut down the idea. No way would they let their friend fall into that abyss.
"Why are you hitting me? That idea came from Kitahara the idiot, not me! I'm just giving you market insights!"
Kamishiro rubbed his head, feeling wronged.
Fwoosh!
Chisa's eyes lit up with a glowing red effect and locked onto Iori like a targeting laser.
Sensing danger, Iori quickly backed away and defended himself. "Hey, I never said anything about physical labor, alright?"
"Then what are you planning to sell? I doubt Aina has anything valuable left."
They didn't know Aina's full family situation, but if she had to go home due to money issues, she probably didn't have anything worth auctioning.
"No, no, not Aina's stuff!"
Iori quickly denied it. Not only did Aina have nothing, neither did they.
But Kamishiro's panties auction had sparked an idea in him.
If a single pair of unused panties could fetch at least 10,000 yen…
"I remember we still have Kaya Mizuki's diving suit at the shop!"
Smack!
Before he could even finish, Chisa nearly tore off half his face.
"Scumbag!"
After spending so much time with Iori, how could she not know what he was thinking?
"That's actually a great idea!"
Kamishiro's eyes lit up. That was an ultra high-grade item! Easy to sell—and their buyer was right there!
With that thought, Kamishiro silently handed his phone to Kohei, the auction page still open.
Kohei understood instantly. Time to give it their all!
!!!
"No way! Absolutely not!"
Chisa flat-out rejected the idea. If word got out, the shop would be ruined.
And she had already noticed Kamishiro and Kohei's sneaky actions. Alarmed, she snatched Kamishiro's phone.
"You two didn't already… upload it secretly, did you…"
Chisa, initially tense, went quiet as she read the screen. Then she tossed the phone aside.
"No matter how much you offer, I'm not selling that diving suit."
"How could you!!"
Kohei was devastated. This was the closest he'd ever gotten to Kaya Mizuki's diving suit!
(′｀;)?
"What's going on?"
Iori picked up the phone, still confused—until he saw the listing:
"Hello everyone, I'm selling a kidney!
Photo: Kohei.jpg
Price: 2 million yen
Reason: …"
Iori's mouth twitched. What the hell was this farewell ceremony for his kidney and his wife?
Was Kohei planning to die within three days?
And who was it that said selling your body was unethical? Now you're literally selling a part of it…
"Nope! Not happening!"
Chisa shook her head fiercely, completely firm in her stance. She wouldn't let the diving shop go down like this.
And just to be safe, she stood up and headed outside. "I'm going to hide the diving suit!"
"No, nooooo!!!"
Watching her determined back, Kohei shed tears of despair.
His Kaya Mizuki… his everything!
"Kohei, lift your head!"
Just as he was drowning in hopelessness, a diving suit appeared before him.
It was Kitahara!
Kohei looked at him in disbelief. "Kitahara… is this?!"
Kitahara smiled like an angel. "Yeah. I snatched it from Chisa beforehand. I figured you'd want it."
"Kitahara!"
Kohei was crying. From this day onward, Iori Kitahara was officially his best friend!
Poke poke
Shiro Kamishiro had somehow crept up behind Iori and was now scrutinizing the wetsuit in his hands. "…Isn't this kind of big?"
He whispered, "You didn't seriously take that one, did you?"
"Of course not. I don't even know where that one is. This is Uncle Kotegawa's old wetsuit!"
"Ohhh~"
Shiro let out a relieved breath. If it had been Mizuki Kaya's wetsuit, he would have done everything in his power to stop Kohei.
He had just remembered that Mizuki Kaya—the same Mizuki Kaya who'd performed at the KōKamashiro Shirou Uta Gassen—had a negative distance relationship with him…
Shiro cast a pitying glance toward the sobbing Kohei, further solidifying his resolve: Kohei must never learn the truth.
The guy was ready to sell a kidney over a wetsuit. Shiro couldn't begin to imagine what Kohei would do if he ever found out.
Most likely outcome? One less student at Izu University, one more criminal in Japan… and a body added to the ocean.
Too terrifying!!!