Eventually…
The campsite ground was littered with bottles, and several bottles of "Water of Life" were completely emptied.
With such intense drinking…
Chisa finally managed to drink herself under the table!
"Even in this kind of environment, I can still party hard, right?!"
"I may seem standoffish normally, but when it comes to work, I'm actually really…"
Drunk Chisa was mumbling nonsense in front of several of the older girls. It looked like Shiro's earlier comments had lit a fire under her.
"She's completely wasted."
Shiro and the others could tell just by looking—this girl was drunk out of her mind.
"Game's over."
"Time for regular drinking now?"
The games may have ended, but the casual drinking continued!
The senpai led the idiot trio to fetch more booze from the tents. The uncle on this deserted island had an unlimited beer supply, which was truly a blessing!
"If I had to say… it's my love for the sea that makes me drunk with joy!!!"
Chisa's loud voice caught everyone's attention. They saw her staggering toward the ocean.
And then—
Thud!
She gave the sea and the beach a big, passionate kiss!
"..."
Watching this, Shiro's mouth twitched uncontrollably.
Did he… say anything strange earlier? What set this girl off?
Unable to figure it out, Shiro quickened his pace. He was afraid Asuza nee and the others might accuse him of poisoning her with toxic pep talks!
Bang!
Chisa, who was in a critical clash, collapsed entirely and crashed heavily onto Iori.
...
"Hiss~ that hurts a bit."
Walking next to Maya, Shiro rubbed his forehead. There was still a big bump on it—he had been hit by a baseball bat...
"What happened?"
Maya asked with some concern as she gently massaged the bump, which clearly looked fresh.
(;?＿?)
"Just a little misunderstanding..."
Shirou turned his head away guiltily. He had only meant to go grab some booze, but who would've thought a drunk Chisa would be so feral and whack him with a bat? Hopefully that idiot Kitahara's okay…
No—wait!
He hopes that idiot Kitahara isn't okay!
After all, it's way easier to endure pain when someone else is suffering alongside you!
"Be careful~" Maya took a handkerchief from her pocket. There weren't any medicines on hand, but the placebo effect was strong.
"So all that stuff Azusa showed me was real?"
Maya looked into Shirou's eyes, a bit skeptical. The stuff on the school forum was just way too explosive to be fake.
"Ahem, that was just people getting jealous and posting slander."
Shirou looked away. As a seasoned playboy, there was no way he could admit to all the wild things he'd done in the past!
No matter how you ask—
He's sticking to the story: "I was framed!"
"Liar!"
Maya didn't believe a word. She hadn't spent that much time with Shirou, but Azusa had already told her everything.
Including how Shirou starts darting his eyes around when he lies!
{{(°△°; "}}!
Busted, Shirou jumped in shock and quickly tried to explain, "You've got to believe me, Maya. I—I still have my first love!"
"Really?!"
Maya's eyes sparkled with joy. In Japan, a guy who makes it to college with his first love still intact is practically an endangered species.
Thinking about it, she realized that most guys in Izu University's mechanical engineering department were rare creatures like that…
"Ahem, really."
This time, Shirou held back the urge to glance around. After all, he'd never officially dated anyone—so technically, claiming he still had a first love wasn't totally false!
Fake it till you make it.jpg
"Then let's be together!"
Maya exclaimed excitedly. Hearing that her crush didn't have a girlfriend was the best news she'd gotten in a while.
But her words startled Shirou, "Um… maybe we shouldn't. I mean, you are a celebrity..."
He started sweating nervously. No matter what, he couldn't give up an entire forest for a single tree—even if that tree was a hundred-year-old redwood.
Besides, this situation wasn't something he could just pull out of on his own. He was sure that if his relationship got exposed, he wouldn't survive the next day.
Sakurako and Kiyoko weren't the jealous type—they were the vengeful type!
So Shirou tried to use Maya's celebrity status as a shield to keep some distance.
And when it came down to love or career, it's career all the way!
The senpais said it best: "There's no eternal eighteen—but there will always be eighteen-year-olds!"
As long as you have enough money, love is something that can be cultivated~
Unfortunately, Shirou miscalculated one thing.
Standing before him wasn't some wannabe star clinging to a fake persona—Maya was a voice actress who had already performed at the NHK KōShiro Uta Gassen.
She didn't need a public image to boost her fame. Plus, she had more than enough money to last a lifetime.
"I could announce my retirement. Then we could open a shop together—by the beach!"
Maya leaned into Shirou's arms, clearly a love-struck girl blinded by romance.
Shirou twitched slightly. This A-list celebrity was surprisingly pure.
If he didn't have a conscience, couldn't he just scam her into bankruptcy?
But in the end, his conscience still held firm.
Shirou gently embraced Maya. "Maya, our meeting was a fluke, but I'm truly lucky that you've waited for me.
But… Maya, I don't want—I don't want to just stay by your side like this!
You shine like the sun, and me? I don't even deserve to stand next to you.
Give me some time, okay?"
Shirou looked at Maya with deep sincerity, like a poor boy working hard to marry a princess.
Hearing this heartfelt confession, Maya's eyes welled with tears. "I… I don't mind! Shirou-kun!"
"But I mind!"
Shirou gently wiped away her tears, then kissed the corner of her lips. "Just wait for me a little, okay?"
"Mhm~"
Maya, who had never encountered a playboy before, completely fell for Shirou's sweet-talking. She snuggled tightly in his arms.
"Maya~"
"Shirou-kun~"
Just as things were about to escalate further, Shirou suddenly spotted someone who definitely should not have been there!
Σ(っ °Д °;)っ
...
"It's a misunderstanding! Kouhei, this is totally a misunderstanding! I have nothing going on with Maya!"
In the forest on the deserted island, Shirou was running for his life, with a demon hot on his heels!
"Unforgivable! Absolutely unforgivable! I saw you hugging Lady Maya!!!"
Kouhei was in hot pursuit—yes, he was the demon!
And it all began with that cursed embrace.
When Shirou had hugged Maya and was about to land a French kiss, he'd seen him—Kouhei!
After a brief shock, Kouhei had undergone a transformation and was now fully in hunter mode, wildly chasing Shirou with a baseball bat.
"Calm down, Kouhei! Seeing isn't believing!"
"Prove your innocence with your life, you scumbag!!!"
(」＞＜)」
Feeling the wrath of the demon closing in, Shirou had no choice but to run for his life.
Damn it, wasn't Kouhei supposed to be playing games or something? Why did he suddenly show up in this secluded forest?!
Shirou cursed silently. He had accounted for everything, but not this random twist.
And, of course, it was all Iori's fault. Because of him, Kouhei didn't get any booze and randomly wandered into the woods.
I hope Iori sleeps peacefully in front of whatever tent he passed out near.
"No choice left!"
Looking at the slope ahead, Shirou—desperate to avoid getting chopped into pieces—had a bold idea!
He drifted sharply and, with incredible strength, grabbed a branch on the cliff face.
With such a perfect blind spot, Shirou didn't believe that idiot could possibly find him.
Sure enough, Kouhei prowled the slope's edge for several minutes without spotting Shirou, and eventually stormed off in another direction, still unwilling to give up.
"Whew… that scared the hell out of me."
Clinging to a branch on the steep slope, Shirou let out a relieved breath. Thankfully, that idiot wasn't smart enough to check the cliff.
But just as he relaxed, Shirou forgot one critical rule—Murphy's Law.
As he tried to climb back up to camp, the fragile branch snapped clean off.
In a flash, with pupils contracting, Shirou plummeted down the slope!
"Noooo!!!"
(′｀;)?
In the distance, Kouhei turned around in confusion. He thought he heard Shirou's voice. Could he have gone the wrong way?
Looking at the tall grass ahead, Kouhei shook his head.
No—this had to be a trick. A decoy!
Someone as smart as him would never fall for that!!!
Keep searching!!!
...
Bang!
At the bottom of the slope, Shirou crashed down hard. But unexpectedly—it didn't hurt at all?
"Did I drink myself numb?"
Shirou's first thought was that the alcohol had dulled his senses.
But then again, he hadn't drunk that much…
"Could it be… a plot device?!"
His imagination kicked in. In novels, when protagonists fall off cliffs, they always find some legendary martial arts technique!
Okay, maybe this wasn't a cliff, but a mountain of gold would be a fair reward, right?
Thinking this, Shirou shifted his hips slightly.
Hmm, soft and springy~
"Y-You bastard… can you get off me already… Σ_(|||」∠)"
Just as Shirou was enjoying the softness beneath him, a voice spoke up!
Σ(っ °Д °;)っ
"W-What the hell?! Who are you?! Some kind of ghost?!"
Shirou, who was terrified of ghosts, turned pale in an instant and jumped up nervously.
No one said getting secret martial arts came with a test!
"Look down!"
While Shirou looked around in confusion, the voice came again—this time, from below?
He looked down to see a humanoid figure disguised as a seat cushion lying beneath him.
{{(°△°; "}}!
"Holy crap! Kudou?!"
Seeing who it was, Shirou jumped back in alarm, glaring, "You're the one who snuck under me without a sound! Don't you dare try to blame this on me!"
With his extensive experience in scamming before being scammed, Shiro went straight for a preemptive strike—eliminating any chance of his wallet suffering damage!
"You bastard, who the hell would try to scam you?! Shouldn't you be more worried about the injured first?!"
"Injured? Where, where?"
Shiro looked around instinctively, but there was nothing but trees—no sign of anyone else nearby.
With a puzzled expression, he turned to Kudo. "So where's this 'injured person' you're talking about?"
(°д°)
"Who the hell do you think it is?!"
Kudo glared angrily at Shiro and pointed at his own face. With multiple shoe prints stamped across it, it was obvious who the injured one was.
"..."
Looking at this pitiful sight of a dignified third-year senior, Shiro's face twitched as he tried to suppress a laugh.
He had to mentally recall every tragic memory in his life just to barely hold back—but even so, his shoulders trembled as he silently handed over a wet wipe.
Unfortunately, Shiro hadn't experienced many sad things in life.
He couldn't hold it in and burst out laughing.
"Ku-ku-ku-ku-ku~"
(°д°)
"What the hell are you laughing at?!"
"President Kudo, I swear I'm not laughing at you. I just remembered my three lovely wives and got happy, keh keh keh~"
As he said this, he pulled out his beloved camera. Getting a shot of a third-year senior with shoe prints on his face? That's a once-in-a-lifetime scoop!
Especially when it was the super popular Kudo—the heat this post would get would be unreal~ (λ?_??)
Just looking at his rising reputation on the forum, Shiro could already predict who would be the next forum moderator.
Obviously—himself!!!
Time to grind out some viral news!
He'd already decided on the headline for this one:
"President Kudo and the Unforgettable Tale of the Size 43 Shoe!"
"AHHHHHHH!!! You bastard, shut up already! And stop taking pictures! (っ╥╯﹏╰╥c)"
Kudo lost it.
"..."
After all the excitement, silence followed.
If he knew how to smoke, Shiro would've lit one for the mood.
"You alright?"
Leaning against the hillside and gazing up at the stars, Shiro spoke, his voice oddly emotional.
Kudo paused, then gave a wry smile tinged with bitterness. "Heh, never thought you'd actually care."
"Need a hand?"
"If you could—then GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS AND MOVE!!!"
Kudo roared.
At the moment, he was furiously cranking a small hand-powered generator.
Yup—one of those old-fashioned hand-crank ones.
His current mission: recharge Shiro's dead phone.
Judging by his stiff movements and despairing expression, it was obvious this was exhausting work.
Who the hell still carries something like this around?!
If Shiro knew his phone was dead, he should've charged it beforehand!
Kudo was in complete despair. For the first time, he understood what it felt like to be a donkey.
(っ╥╯﹏╰╥c)