Meanwhile, when Iori and the others had picked enough chestnuts and were happily heading back to regroup with Kamishiro...
They saw a huge rhinoceros beetle fussing over a golden "sculpture."
The "sculpture" was done in a very free ancient Greek style.
Wait, that triangle underwear gave it a modern twist!
And judging from the expression on the "sculpture," it radiated an overwhelming sense of humiliation and sorrow!
Wait—
That hand clinging tightly to the triangle briefs... also conveyed a trace of defiance!?
Defiance... for the underwear?
The group exchanged bewildered looks.
So…
What the hell are Kamishiro and Kohei up to this time?!
"Umm… what are you two doing?"
Watching Kamishiro busily working, Aina couldn't take it anymore and spoke up.
The sudden voice startled Kamishiro, and he paused his movements.
Immediately—
Ikegoshi let out a pained scream.
"DON'T push there!!!"
"Ah, sorry, sorry."
Kamishiro smiled apologetically, then used a brush to reapply the honey evenly where he'd pressed too hard earlier. Only then did he turn to face Iori and the others.
"Isn't it obvious? We're catching beetles!"
?_?
Everyone froze.
That is so not obvious!
It looked more like avant-garde performance art gone wrong!
Seeing everyone was shocked by his brilliant creativity, Kamishiro proudly put his hands on his hips and began explaining enthusiastically.
"As everyone knows, beetles love honey. So if we have enough honey, we're sure to lure them out!"
...
Iori and the others twitched at the corners of their mouths. Thanks for the biology lesson, but...
Chisa: "Why did you apply the honey to someone's body?"
Kamishiro: "Well, it's easier to catch them that way, and we can observe them up close!"
Aina: "Then why not apply it to your own body?"
Kamishiro: "Because it's hard to wash off!"
A very confident answer.
Everyone looked at the 'Kohei' not far away with pity. It felt like someone had been seriously conned.
Ikegoshi: (*?????) It wasn't voluntary!
Oddly enough, the two senior members found the method very interesting.
"Oh, I see."
"It's actually quite a clever approach—using everyday knowledge to its fullest!"
Their eyes gleamed with curiosity as they admired the honey-covered muscles.
There was a... strange appeal to them.
Aina stared at them in horror. How is this normal knowledge?!
She did not want to see two more "free-spirited" statues!
She turned to Azusa for help, hoping the elder would step in and stop this madness.
Understanding her junior's plea, Azusa gave Aina a thumbs-up with a reassuring smile.
Then—
Azusa patted Tokita and Kotobuki on the shoulder and said,
"Remember to wash off the honey when you drive back later."
Tokita: "No problem!"
Kotobuki: "This is perfect—now that hot spring we found earlier will come in handy!"
Saying that, the two of them went to get honey from Kamishiro, and even took a few bottles of alcohol from the shell to experiment with what would happen if they mixed honey and booze.
"That's NOT the point!!!"
Aina was losing it. She was often baffled by how this group's brain circuits worked!
"Relax, it's not like it's your first day knowing these people."
Iori seemed completely used to it, even wearing a smug expression like he was the only sane one in the group.
Then he walked toward the 'Kohei,' inspecting the honey-covered body.
"You… don't happen to have some kind of blackmail held against you, right?"
Voice acting? Anime?
Otherwise, Kohei would never listen to Kamishiro.
Also—
When did Kohei get a pair of triangle briefs?
It was way too eye-catching.
Iori's gaze drifted down to Ikegoshi's lower half, as if searching for something.
Sensing the gaze, Ikegoshi quickly clamped his legs together and forced a smile.
He had no blackmail—he was just half-pushed, half-forced into this.
"Hey hey hey, I can't pretend I didn't hear that! I'm seriously helping Ikegoshi overcome his fears here!"
Kamishiro wasn't having it. This was a win-win situation!
Help Ikegoshi overcome his phobia, and catch beetles in the process.
Only a genius like him could've thought of this!
"It's still trickery… wait, what did you just say?"
Iori suddenly noticed something was off.
"I said, helping him overcome his fear—"
"No, before that. Who?"
"Ikegoshi."
"Ikegoshi?!" ×3
Aina and Chisa heard it too, and all three stared at Ikegoshi in utter shock.
So…
This honey-covered, nearly naked person wasn't their idiot buddy Kohei…
It was the handsome idol Ikegoshi, who debuted seven years ago?!
With his identity suddenly exposed, Ikegoshi gave a smile uglier than crying.
"L-Long time no see, everyone…"
Now is not the time to be reintroducing yourself!!
Wearing that, he had no clue how to talk to the girls anymore!
Might as well ask this…
How are these three girls able to blend in so naturally with this group?!
And even speak to them so calmly.
Ikegoshi looked around — the five men present were naked, only one wearing a beetle cosplay costume and one a pair of triangle briefs!
What kind of scene was this?! A meet-up of the Great Bird Spin-Spin Club?!
"Are they acquaintances?"
Azusa, who had never met Ikegoshi before, was a bit puzzled.
From everyone's reaction just now, it seemed this wasn't Kohei, but someone named Ikegoshi?
They looked way too alike!
Chisa nodded, a strange expression on her face as she explained to Azusa, "He's the big star we met in Palau before. Because he looks like Kohei, all of Mom's promo footage was shot with Kohei instead. I didn't expect we'd run into him here again…"
And in such an awkward outfit.
It was obvious that ever since returning from Palau, Ikegoshi had really started letting himself go style-wise.
Chisa, not knowing the full picture, silently admired Ikegoshi's dedication and courage to discard his image!
Upon hearing this, Azusa's eyes lit up. She'd already heard about this story from Kamishiro and the others.
She quickly moved in front of Ikegoshi and greeted him with a smile, "Hello, Ikegoshi. I've heard so much about you~"
"Uh… Hello…"
(>﹏<)
Could he please be left alone to mentally shut down for a bit?
He'd never appeared in front of any girl other than Yukari while wearing only briefs before.
Watching the somewhat shy Ikegoshi, Azusa tilted her head. This world was so bizarre. Not only did this guy look like Kohei, but his personality seemed similar too.
"Ikegoshi seems a bit socially anxious too~"
???
Social anxiety?
He's not socially anxious at all!
Ikegoshi screamed inwardly. Any normal person wouldn't be able to handle this kind of situation either!
Just as he was about to explain and look for a place to wash the honey off himself, Kamishiro spoke up.
"I think Ikegoshi's social anxiety probably stems from the rhinoceros beetle on his body. Seems like he still hasn't overcome it."
Rhinoceros beetle?
What beetle?
Ikegoshi suddenly had a bad feeling and slowly lowered his head.
Only to lock eyes with a very muscular-looking rhinoceros beetle.
He could vaguely see its mouthparts still sucking up the honey.
"..."
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! A BUG!!!"
________________
After Ikegoshi was startled by the sudden appearance of the rhinoceros beetle, the whole scene descended into chaos.
He ran, it chased — no escape, no mercy~
Honey-man, the beetle, and the giant beetle began circling around the two senpai who were in the middle of researching the properties of mixing honey with "Water of Life."
The scene was so bizarre, you could've convinced someone it was some kind of cult ritual…
Aina turned to look at Iori nearby.
Suddenly, Iori seemed like a normal person in all this!
But… why was this "normal" person taking photos like some perverted creep?
What exactly are you trying to capture?!
Was there anyone normal here?
…
Some time passed.
Once the senpai finished analyzing the honey, the whole absurd event finally came to an end.
Kamishiro triumphantly caught the rhinoceros beetle he'd had his eye on all along.
The senpais cheerfully enjoyed their honey-infused Water of Life for afternoon tea.
Only Ikegoshi lay sprawled on the grass like a broken toy.
o(╥﹏╥)o
Smelling the fragrance of the earth, Ikegoshi let tears slide from the corners of his eyes. Why wasn't the director around to capture that scene?!
He felt it was overflowing with variety-show vibes!
A breakthrough for himself!
Poor Ikegoshi… so professional.
Even in such a state, the first thing he thought about was the program footage.
"Ikegoshi, are you okay…?"
Chisa asked with concern. After all, he was an idol with some public influence.
Being treated this way — was that really alright?
"Ahaha… I'm fine."
Seeing someone worry for him, Ikegoshi quickly got up and instinctively struck a cool pose!
Idol instincts!
Unfortunately…
He forgot what state he was in.
Thanks to all the frantic movement earlier, his poor triangle briefs had reached their limit.
The moment he stood up—
A piece of cloth soaked in golden sticky liquid fell from his crotch.
At that moment—
Time seemed to freeze for Ikegoshi, leaving only the cursed camera shutter sound echoing in his ears.
"THERE'S NO NEED TO PHOTOGRAPH THIS!!!"
Ikegoshi yelled toward Iori. Couldn't he leave an idol a shred of dignity?!
"Oh, that? I'm going to upload it to the school forum to slander Kohei. Since you and Kohei look exactly alike, you can be his stand-in."
"Don't worry, Ikegoshi! With Kohei's reputation, no one will suspect it's you!"
PFT!
For some reason, Ikegoshi felt even more stabbed in the heart by those words.
o(╥﹏╥)o
"Don't be so down, Ikegoshi. Be brave! Come say hi to Kō-chan?"
Kamishiro had originally planned to pat Ikegoshi on the shoulder for comfort.
But when he saw the sticky yellow goo, he silently retracted his hand mid-air… and instead offered the rhinoceros beetle he had just caught.
"DON'T COME NEAR ME!"
Ikegoshi frantically backed away. After Kamishiro's "face-your-fears" therapy, he'd become even more terrified of insects!
Seeing this, Kamishiro sighed in disappointment, "Ikegoshi, you really won't be able to film the show at this rate."
"Show?"
Iori, Aina, and Chisa all looked confused. So Ikegoshi was here to film a program?
"Is it a wilderness survival show this time?"
"No, more accurately, it's a beetle education segment."
"..."
Beetle education…
The three of them all twitched at the corners of their mouths. With Ikegoshi like this, how would he even dare?!
Seeing everyone's dumbfounded expressions, Ikegoshi opened his mouth… then gave up trying to explain.
So tired. Let the world end already.
"Where's the film crew?"
Iori looked around. Aside from them, there wasn't a single soul in sight. Even Kohei had vanished.
Kamishiro: "Ah, they left him behind…"
Ikegoshi: "No they didn't! They probably saw a rare beetle and went to film it!"
"..."
Seeing Ikegoshi's desperate reasoning, Kamishiro looked at him with a pitying gaze.
And then delivered the final blow — a truth Ikegoshi had always known but didn't want to admit:
"In that case, wouldn't they have at least left one person to wait for you?"
Those words completely crushed all of Ikegoshi's excuses.
That pitiful look in Kamishiro's eyes pierced Ikegoshi's tender little heart.
Ikegoshi squatted under a tree, drawing circles in the dirt, as if he'd lost all meaning in life.
"You're right… Maybe I really am not cut out to be an entertainer…"
Kamishiro: ???
Hey hey hey!
When did he ever say Ikegoshi wasn't suited to be an entertainer?! Why was this guy adding drama to himself again?
Wasn't this actually great variety-show material?!
Could it be… because of the director switch?
That thought made Kamishiro a little excited.
Could this be his second chance?!
Then, as if suddenly struck by inspiration, Azusa spoke up excitedly:
"Hey, Kamishiro—what if the crew saw Kohei midway and mistook him for Ikegoshi, so they started filming with him instead? Hahahaha…"
"...Why aren't you guys laughing?"
Azusa had originally just been joking. After all, when Kohei left earlier, he wasn't even wearing clothes. There was still some difference between him and Ikegoshi.
Like… a triangle brief's worth of difference!
But now…
The difference wasn't so big anymore.
Seeing the strange expressions on Kamishiro and the others' faces, Azusa's own expression froze.
"Surely… that's not what really happened… right?"
________________
Kamishiro and the other three exchanged a look full of mutual understanding and said:
"Case closed!"
"This must be the truth behind it all!"
"Well, it is Kohei, after all!"
"Doing things that can easily be misunderstood is just par for the course for him!"
"…"
Kohei's reputation… has allegedly taken damage!
But this was probably the correct answer. Kamishiro walked over to Ikegoshi once again.
Now that they had guessed the real reason, they had to explain it to the victim.
"Ikegoshi, don't be so down. I have good news for you!"
"Good news?"
Ikegoshi lifted his head in despair. He hadn't heard any of their conversation earlier because he'd been too heartbroken.
But whatever. He couldn't imagine any news that would cheer him up now.
"That's right—great news!"
"Your public image is saved!"
"Based on our guess, Kohei has probably stepped in as your double again. He's probably with the director right now. Who knows? The show might already be fully filmed!"
"Congratulations!"
Ikegoshi: ???
Congratulations?
Good news??
Are you seriously calling this "good news"?!
Ikegoshi almost spat out blood. He wanted to become a respected actor, dammit!
This was practically a body swap!
Last time, it had been absolutely unavoidable—he needed that career pivot, and nothing could go wrong.
But now…
Ikegoshi looked into Kamishiro's earnest eyes and tears of "gratitude" streamed down his face.
"I still… want to do this myself…"
Whoosh!!!
Just as Ikegoshi tried to express his own ideas about acting, a chestnut flew past his ear at an unbelievable speed.
He swore he heard a sonic boom!
Instinctively, he turned in the direction the projectile came from.
And there he saw—
A furious beast!!!
And one that was strangling the director by the neck!
Σ(っ °Д °;)っ
So this is the so-called "good news"?!
The show is finished?
This looks more like the entire production team is about to be finished!!
At that moment Ikegoshi was terrified!