Read ahead of public release on P atreon at: p-atreon.com/Knockturn_Alley
Check out Chapter illustrations on Pixiv at unhinged_uchiha
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While Kanzou spoke with Chiaki, Misaki led Mikoto to another area where the newborn kittens were kept. At least a dozen tiny kittens lay scattered around the room, alongside their mothers, who rested lazily or groomed themselves.
"Oh, aren't they adorable~" Mikoto exclaimed, instantly falling in love. The kittens looked impossibly soft and innocent, like little plush toys brought to life.
Yoru leapt down from Mikoto's arms and padded over to a nearby nest. Six kittens immediately swarmed her, nuzzling against her body and letting out tiny meows and nyas, making Mikoto blink in surprise.
"This litter… is it…?" Mikoto murmured.
Misaki nodded, confirming her guess. "Yes… They're his. Yoru's the father."
"Oh… Yoru… I didn't expect that," Mikoto murmured as she bent down, holding catnip in her hand and offering it to the litter.
The kittens immediately caught the scent and scampered toward her, eagerly nibbling at the small balls. Meanwhile, Yoru proudly began introducing them. "The bigger one with fur like mine is Retsu. The smaller one is Rukia. The purple one is Yoru'ichi, the orange-furred one is Orihime, the yellow one is Rangiku, and the white one is Isane." After finishing, Yoru puffed out his chest and asked, "They're good names, right?"
"Mm… yes," Mikoto nodded, unsure what else to say. The names were nice, she just wasn't completely convinced they suited cats.
"I picked them myself," Yoru added proudly.
Misaki rolled her eyes. "What are you so proud of? You just picked the names of Shinigami from that story Kanzou-sama once told us, wasn't it? And on top of that, you gave female names to all of them. Two of your kittens are males. You should've used Yūshirō instead of Yoru'ichi, and Retsu doesn't fit either. Zaraki would've been better."
Yoru immediately bristled. "Eh, no. I like these names, I'm not changing them," he said firmly, then added, "Besides, I already asked Boss if I could use names from that story, and he said that he doesn't care… so it's fine."
"Idiot… these two are definitely going to hate you when they grow up," Misaki said, folding her arms.
"They will not hate me!" Yoru shot back stubbornly.
"Oh, they absolutely will," Misaki repeated with a smirk.
Mikoto stepped in, trying to calm them. "Alright, you two, there's no need to argue over something like this." At the same time, she felt a little lost. The talk about stories left her confused, and she couldn't help but ask, "Yoru… you said you picked these names from a story Kanzou-sama told you. What do you mean? What story? And… why do you call Kanzou-sama 'boss'?"
"Eh… the story was called… Bleak?" Yoru replied uncertainly.
"It wasn't Bleak. It was Bleach," Misaki corrected flatly.
"Yeah, yeah… same thing," Yoru nodded dismissively, then continued, "Whenever Kanzou-sama visits, he tells us stories. He's really good at it, you know. There was one called Black Clover, then Avengers, A Song of Ice & Fire… and this Bleach story is one of the ones he told us."
"Is that so…?" Mikoto murmured. She hadn't known Kanzou was such a good storyteller. Then again, she realized she barely knew him at all. She only understood the surface, his reputation, the bad things he did to others and her, the dangerous man whose actions she had personally witnessed. But beyond that, she knew very little. After all, she had always observed him from a distance. She hadn't truly come to know him until just a few days ago, and it hadn't even been a month since he had taken her virginity.
She wanted to know more about him… learn more about him… because only by knowing more about him can she actually ever hope to make herself a place in his heart…
"And what about this 'boss' thing?" she asked after a moment. "Why do you call him that?"
She had expected the answer to be something cute, but when she asked, both Yoru and Misaki hesitated and exchanged a look, clearly debating whether they should tell her.
"Is something wrong?" Mikoto asked, narrowing her eyes slightly. "Is it something you can't tell me?"
"Well… since Kanzou-sama brought you along, it should be fine," Misaki murmured after a moment. "If he didn't want you to know, he probably wouldn't have brought you here." She then explained, "Kanzou-sama has signed a summoning contract with all the cats in this place."
"A summoning contract with all the cats?" Mikoto repeated in surprise.
It's not that the ninja cats didn't sign a summoning contract with the ninjas… but for all the cats to have signed a summoning contract with just one shinobi… it was very shocking.
"It happened during the Second Great Shinobi War," Misaki explained. "One day, Kanzou-sama simply walked in and made a demand to Okaa-san. They discussed it for a while, but even I don't know all the details."
As she spoke, Misaki walked over to a cabinet, opened it, and took out a scroll. She unfurled it in front of Mikoto. "Okaa-san set a condition: if he could collect the paw prints of every cat here, she would allow the contract. Look, these are all the paw prints he gathered that day. Every single one is here... well… from that time… Now we also make sure to add the new ones… since all of them are automatically summoned by his…"
"This one's mine," Yoru said proudly, pointing at a specific mark. "Each neko-nin had a different condition. Mine was simple: I wanted to hear a good story. If he impressed me, I'd give him my paw print. That's when the boss told me about Bleach... and it blew my mind, and I gave my paw print…"
"I see…" Mikoto nodded slowly, beginning to understand.
Yoru continued, unfazed. "The other neko-nin all had their own conditions, but… boss satisfied every single one of them, one way or another. As for those who were too stubborn and refused to give their paw prints…" He shrugged. "They were beaten to a pulp and threatened until they gave in. Boss said he'd torture them and kill them otherwise."
"Yes… that does sound like Kanzou-sama," Mikoto replied with a giggle. She accepted it without hesitation. This was exactly the kind of Kanzou she knew, who gets what he wants one way or the other, not at all caring about the fact that he may be hurting others in the process.
Or rather, he enjoys hurting others in the process…
Still, she felt a quiet sense of awe at the thought of Kanzou accomplishing something like this in the middle of the Second Great Shinobi War.
And many questions lingered in her mind. Why had Chiaki agreed to let Kanzou form summoning contracts with all the neko-nin? And why had Kanzou needed so many ninja cats in the first place?
'Was it because he refused to partner with anyone else and chose to keep only that bespectacled kunoichi in his squad?' she wondered. 'Perhaps he had planned to use the neko-nin to compensate for his lack of manpower in his squad.'
With the help of the ninja cats, it made sense that he would always have ample manpower and plenty of resources to complete his missions efficiently.
Still, that was only her conjecture. She didn't actually know if it was true, so she asked, "What did Kanzou-sama have all of you do?"
Yoru hesitated, looking troubled, but answered anyway. "He made us search for someone…"
"Search for someone? Who?" Mikoto pressed.
At that, Yoru shook his head. "I can't say. You'll have to ask him yourself. He forbade anyone from talking about it."
"I see…" Mikoto murmured, choosing not to push further. She assumed it was tied to a mission, something not meant to be discussed openly.
Misaki pouted. "Even I don't know about this…" Unlike Mikoto, who understood such secrecy as part of a kunoichi's life, Misaki, who wasn't a kunoichi, felt openly dissatisfied. She snorted and muttered, "Knowing Kanzou-sama, I bet it was a woman."
Mikoto blinked in surprise at the assumption. For a moment, she frowned, wondering why Misaki would immediately jump to the conclusion that Kanzou-sama would only search for a woman. She hesitated, wanting to ask about it, but before she could speak, Misaki shook her head.
"Forget it. It doesn't matter," Misaki said, brushing the thought aside. She rolled the scroll of paw prints back up, slid it into the cabinet, and turned to Mikoto with open curiosity. "Anyway, Mikoto-sama, you live in Konoha, right? You're an Uchiha, so you see him often. Every day, even? Are you in the same squad as him? Or do you assist him with something?"
"I'm not in the same squad," Mikoto said. "But I do help him with a few things, paperwork, cooking his dinner, managing the house while he's at work."
She felt very embarrassed saying all this, because the more she thought about it, the more it sounded like the role of a wife. Yet their current relationship didn't grant her that place. Right now, she was closer to a maid, no, a canary, as he liked to call it.
And still… what she truly wanted was to be his wife.
"Manage the house?" Misaki froze. "Y-you… live with him?"
Mikoto nodded. "Yes…" She rushed to explain. "I-I know it sounds inappropriate, but there were circumstances, and—"
"That doesn't matter," Misaki cut in, shaking her head. "What matters is that you live with him."
"As I said, there is a reason," Mikoto insisted, still trying to explain, unwilling to let Misaki think she was some loose woman living with a man who wasn't her husband.
Misaki shook her head again. "I said it doesn't matter." She walked over to the sofa and sat down, her voice carrying a clear edge of envy. "You live with him. That's all that matters. Must be nice."
"Nice?" Mikoto blinked, caught off guard.
Misaki nodded. "Yeah. Nice. Living under the same roof as him." She looked away. "You must serve him a lot, right? Before sleep. After waking up. You're lucky, aren't you?" Her gaze sharpened. "Getting his cock inside you every day."
Mikoto froze at Misaki's sudden bluntness. She hadn't expected her to speak so openly, or to bring up something so intimate.
"Misaki-san… you really shouldn't talk about something like that," Mikoto said, her voice tense.
"Why not?" Misaki replied without hesitation. "It's true, isn't it? He fucks you every day."
Mikoto pressed her lips together, irritation flickering in her eyes. She had made it clear she didn't want to discuss it, yet Misaki kept going. For a moment, Mikoto even wondered if she was doing it on purpose. There was an unmistakable edge to her words, something sharp and bitter.
"…You sound envious," Mikoto said quietly.
"Do I?" Misaki murmured. She paused, then nodded. "I guess I am. And why wouldn't I be? You get fucked every day… meanwhile, I'm stuck here, and I barely ever get the chance to have any sex."
"I don't know what to say to that," Mikoto replied, her expression tense.
Misaki sighed. "Yeah… you don't have to." She shook her head, trying to cool off, then asked, "So… what does it feel like?"
"What does what feel like?" Mikoto asked, confused.
"You know," Misaki said flatly. "Getting fucked."
Mikoto shook her head. "I don't think it's appropriate for us to talk about that."
They were friends, yes, but not close enough for her to share something that intimate. What it felt like to be fucked by Kanzou wasn't something she wanted to put into words for someone else.
"Eh… you don't want to talk about it?" Misaki pouted. "I thought we could share each other's experiences…"
Mikoto frowned slightly. "Share experiences?" she asked, clearly confused.
"Hmm… you know…" Misaki replied, completely unaware of Mikoto's thoughts. "Since we're women who share the same man, I thought we could talk about our experiences and exchange a few tips. As your senpai, there are still many things I know about him and his kinks that you probably don't… and I can tell you about them. And as for you…" she added, trailing off slightly, "you can tell me—"
"Misaki-san… you—" Mikoto's eyes widened in shock. "W-what did you just say? S-share the same m-m—?"
"Man?" Misaki echoed after a brief pause. "You know, Kanzou-sama?"
"K-Kanzou-sama… y-you mean…?" Mikoto murmured, her lips trembling.
"Um… yes?" Misaki nodded, then asked hesitantly, "Aren't we sharing the same man? Or did you really think you were the only one he fucks?"
Mikoto tried to answer, but no words came. Misaki took her silence as confirmation and scoffed.
"You actually thought that?" she said. "That you were the only one he fucks?" Her gaze sharpened. "And what else did you believe? Does living in his house and taking care of his daily life turn you into his wife? That you'd stay by his side forever as the only woman around him?"
Amusement flickered across her face, as if Mikoto's assumption were almost laughable.
Mikoto didn't know what she was supposed to say in response.
She had always known, on some level, that Kanzou must have been with other women. His confidence, his certainty, he carried himself during sex like someone deeply experienced.
And… he had never denied it, never claimed she was the first, or even the only one.
Still… hearing it now, directly, from someone she had thought was a friend, someone who spoke so casually about sharing the same man—
Mikoto didn't know what to feel.
Misaki wasn't finished. "Kanzou-sama isn't the kind of man who can ever be with just one woman," she said bluntly. "You'll never be the only one. There's me… and there will be others too. Of course, you'll be one of us, but you'll never be the only one."
Mikoto didn't know how to react. She stood there, frozen.
The certainty in Misaki's voice unsettled her. It sounded less like an opinion and more like an unquestionable truth. Her thoughts spiralled, replaying everything that had happened between her and Kanzou, her mind grinding to a halt under the weight of it all.
Crack! Crack!
She felt so lost and frozen that she didn't even notice the ground beneath her feet crack.
Misaki spotted it first and shouted, "What the—?! Mikoto-sama, dodge!"
But the warning came too late as the concrete suddenly burst open.
"Kyaa!" Mikoto exclaimed as she lost her balance and began to fall. Before she could process what was happening or regain her footing, a hand burst out of the shattered concrete and lunged for her waist.
"Huh? What—?" was all she managed to say as she felt a hand wrap around her and hold her suspended in midair. "Y-you are…!!"
…
Let's turn back the clock a few minutes, to the moment when Kanzou and Mikoto had just stepped into the streets of Sora-ku and begun making their way toward the neko-nin territory.
Kakuzu had just collected a sizable bounty and, after selecting his next target, was already on his way to eliminate him when he noticed three men lurking in the shadows, whispering among themselves.
He didn't stop to see what they were watching, nor did he particularly care, but his sharp hearing effortlessly picked up their conversation anyway.
"Look at her… I've never seen a woman that beautiful."
"Yeah… she's even more beautiful than that old hag Chiaki's daughter… what was her name again? Masaki?"
"It's Misaki."
"Yeah, yeah… that Misaki. She's good-looking too, sure, but compared to this woman, she completely pales in comparison."
"If we capture her and auction her off, I'm sure some noble in the capital would pay at least twenty million ryō to buy her as a slave… We could even get more…"
"We can't miss this chance. She's with just one man. If we take him out, it's safe. We'd be set for life."
"Don't be idiots," the third man snapped. "We're not doing this. It's too risky."
"But the reward would be worth it."
"No, it wouldn't. We'd die. She's clearly a kunoichi, and her companion is a ninja too."
"So what? We've taken down ninjas before. If we catch them off guard—"
Normally, Kakuzu wouldn't have cared. Slave trading wasn't uncommon. There was always a market for war criminals, cheap labor, and women sold for sex. It happened far too often, and people in power were clearly involved, which made it a great source of money.
But, even if there was good money involved with slave trading, he didn't concern himself with it. He liked money, yes, but slavery wasn't his business. He was a mercenary. A bounty hunter. He earned his living hunting bounties, and that was all he cared about.
With that in mind, he kept walking, not even bothering to check who the woman was or how she could be considered so beautiful.
He would have continued on his way, until the next words made him freeze.
"No. We can't," the third man said sharply. "Don't you see the emblem on their cloaks? They're Uchihas."
His voice dropped. "There's one rule in Sora-ku. It's been in place for a long time, and it's the reason we're still alive and operating."
He leaned in. "People like us never mess with the Uchihas. Messing with them is like provoking ogres or demons; it leads to only one ending: death. Don't get swept away by her beauty. She may look stunning," he continued, "but she's probably just as vicious as she is pretty. If you even get close, you wouldn't know how you died. Messing with the Uchihas isn't worth any amount of profit. Ever."
"But… we'd be set for the rest of our lives," one of the men insisted. "We wouldn't have to resort to—"
"No," the third man cut in sharply. "What would happen is that we'd be dead for the rest of our lives. This line of work is dangerous, but at least it keeps us alive. I'll take that any day." He refused outright.
"Uchiha…?" Kakuzu murmured as he came to a halt.
Having lived since the era of the Warring States Period, he knew the name and the reputation that came with it. Turning slightly, he moved to the side to get a better look. The men kept talking about the beautiful woman, but they also mentioned the man with her. That was who Kakuzu wanted to see.
'It won't be him,' he thought, recalling the teenage face from the bounty poster.
It couldn't be. Uchiha Kanzou, the patriarch of the Uchiha Clan, had no reason to be in a place like this. Still, Kakuzu couldn't stop himself from checking, if only to be sure.
The moment he laid eyes on the couple, his expression froze. His breath caught. All five hearts in his body began pounding at once.
'It's him, Uchiha Kanzou!' he screamed in his mind.
The boy was handsome, far more than the bounty poster had suggested. Any woman would have felt her heart race just by looking at him.
Kakuzu felt it too.
But not because of Kanzou's looks.
He wasn't a woman. He wasn't gay. And as an old man whose body no longer functioned like a normal human's, it could even be said that he had no interest in women at all. In that sense, he was effectively asexual.
Yet his heart still thumped.
Not because of Uchiha Kanzou's appearance. Not because of the beauty of the Uchiha woman beside him.
It thumped because Kakuzu was staring at five hundred million ryō walking and talking, because he was looking at the bounty made flesh.
The bounty on Uchiha Kanzou's head had tempted him, but knowing the boy was in Konoha, Kakuzu had chosen to ignore it and pursue other targets. Going to Konoha for Kanzou's head simply wasn't worth the risk.
But now Kanzou stood right in front of him.
That changed everything.
'Boy,' he thought grimly. 'You should never have appeared before me.'
Making that decision, he immediately began preparing for a fight. Even if the battle broke out in Sora-ku, he didn't care. That was five hundred million ryō; he wasn't about to let it slip away.
Still, he didn't rush to attack. Instead, he chose to observe.
He knew nothing about Uchiha Kanzou. Charging in blind would be stupid. As a veteran, he knew that intelligence was very important and rushing in blindly could get him killed… So he stayed hidden, watching carefully. Before long, he noticed a group of drunkards stumbling toward Kanzou, clearly looking for trouble.
'Let's see,' he thought, keeping his killing intent tightly restrained. 'Maybe they'll show me something that I can use.'
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Zzzzzz…
"See?" the third man said, his voice shaking. "Didn't I tell you Uchihas aren't to be messed with? If we'd tried anything… that could've been us."
His two partners gulped, nodding frantically. Their hands and legs trembled as they stared at the corpses foaming at the mouth.
"Y-yeah… It's good you stopped us," one of them muttered.
Meanwhile, Kakuzu frowned. 'W-what the hell was that?'
For a brief moment, a chill ran through him, one he hadn't felt in decades. He raised his hand and stared at it. Goosebumps stood out clearly, even though his body shouldn't have been capable of reacting like that anymore.
He forced himself to calm down and stepped forward, blending into the crowd gathering around the bodies.
When he examined the corpses, he found nothing overtly strange. Kunai embedded in their hearts. Bodies are already stiffening.
Yet the unease didn't fade.
'What kind of jutsu was that?' he wondered, a rare note of fear creeping in.
He had lived for decades, far longer than most shinobi, and there's hardly any Jutsu he hasn't seen or heard… Honestly, considering his deep knowledge of various Jutsu and Chakra Natures, if anyone deserves to be called Professor, then that's definitely him, but even he had never seen or heard of the Jutsu that the Uchiha Kanzou had just used.
One thing was certain: it wasn't genjutsu. Kakuzu had felt its effects himself, however faintly.
But what it was… he couldn't say.
'This might be difficult…' he thought, sensing that Uchiha Kanzou wouldn't be easy to kill.
As an experienced mercenary, Kakuzu knew when to press forward and when to back off. That pulse of chakra, strong enough to make his body tremble, told him retreat was the wiser choice.
But—
'It's five hundred million ryō,' and there may never be another chance like this.
Uchiha Kanzou is the patriarch of the Uchiha Clan and resides in Konoha. Catching him outside the village, alone, would be exceedingly rare. Normally, he would be surrounded by subordinates or stationed in places Kakuzu couldn't reach.
Stalking him long-term to gather information simply wasn't an option.
Even if Kanzou ever left Konoha again, there was no guarantee Kakuzu would be nearby.
Then he thought of the beautiful woman beside Kanzou, 'That Uchiha woman… he seems to care about her.'
A plan began to take shape, but he needed information to act on it.
'If I take the woman with him hostage, I can lure Uchiha Kanzou into a trap… and then—' he thought as he moved toward the man who had been warning his companions not to mess with the Uchihas.
"Hey," Kakuzu said casually, "if Uchihas come here, where do they usually go? And why would a Uchiha come to Sora-ku in the first place?"
Sora-ku wasn't his usual ground, and he knew little about its inner workings. Any scrap of information could be useful.
The man eyed him suspiciously, then answered, "That's simple. If Uchihas show up in Sora-ku, they always visit the cat lady. That's the only reason they come here."
"The cat lady, huh…" Kakuzu muttered, asking a few more questions.
The man frowned. "Look, pal, if you're thinking about causing trouble with the Uchihas, you'd better not."
Kakuzu nodded. "I'm not an idiot. I wouldn't pick a fight with someone capable of that."
"Yeah… I've never seen anything like it in my life," the man admitted, spooked.
"Neither have I," Kakuzu replied.
With that, he parted ways with the man and headed in the direction he'd been given, toward the place where the cat lady of Sora-ku operated.
When he neared the building, he hid in the shadows and observed. Kanzou and Mikoto were already inside. As a sensor-type, Kakuzu could clearly feel their chakra and dozens of other presences as well.
'Those other presences much be the neko-nins…' he thought.
None of them alarmed him individually.
But taken together, they told him one thing clearly.
'I can't attack like this…'
The neko-nin could easily cause chaos, and Kanzou could use that chaos to escape. Kakuzu didn't want that. He knew he had to be meticulous.
So he waited.
Soon, he sensed Mikoto's chakra drifting away from Kanzou's.
'She's separating from him…' His eyes narrowed as he swiftly formed hand seals and pressed his palm to the ground.
"Earth Style: Hiding Mole Jutsu!"
…
"You'll never be the only one. There's me… and there will be others too. Of course, you'll be one of us—but you'll never be the only one."
What are they even talking about? Kakuzu thought. He didn't care.
This was the moment.
While staying hidden underground, he poured chakra into his arm. The stitches along his forearm split apart as black threads spilled out, extending his limb unnaturally. His hand shot upward, racing toward the surface beneath Uchiha Mikoto's feet.
The ground shattered as his arm burst through, lunging for her waist.
"What the—?! Mikoto-sama, dodge!" he heard the other woman shout.
'Too late, I have her in my hand already!' Kakuzu smirked as his hand closed in on his target.
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The PS goal was 100... well, we didn't meet it, makes me a tad bit sad, but... aggh, fine, it doesn't matter, I'll set up another goal... this time the goal is 150 PS within the next 24 hours. So, hurry up and drop your Power Stones!
As a bonus, I'll drop this image of Uchiha Mikoto in her Kunoichi wear.
Read ahead of public release on P atreon at: p-atreon.com/Knockturn_Alley
Check out Chapter illustrations on Pixiv: unhinged_uchiha