Rose gulped, extending the letter, but her gaze was frozen on the god's manhood, coated in an unhealthy amount of white stuff. Even the scent was so potent.
But Marshall didn't even look at her face, grabbed the letter, and shut the door. He jumped back into the bed, under the quilt, pulling Hela back in his arms. Then he opened the letter. It was from Azul.
[Father, I found this rather peculiar man. He is a genius in mathematics, but he claims his knowledge is given to him by the gods. He claims that he receives the formulas in visions. I was curious if you taught him. I have attached the material.]
Marshall turned the page and looked at the formulas. A deep frown marred his face.
"What the fuck is this demonic shit? Did they mash bugs on paper and sent it to me?"
In the end, Marshall threw the page away. It was nonsense to him. Math was for nerds.
He only knew and needed one law.
His goddamn fist.
####
Not many knew, but there was a bar inside the First Man's temple. It was, after all, the home of the First Man. It was also the place where most of the people Marshall collected over the years gathered to drink.
"Fuck this shit." Helvar cursed, old enough to be called an old man, yet possessing the body of a teenager. "Uncle Marty, that smug pile of goat shit thinks he's clever? Oh sure, he can stack bottles till the floor looks like a glass graveyard. Big bloody deal. I'm still growing, I can't drink a damn river yet."
"Grawwrfff."
"Exactly! Dad bottoms out every bottle. I'll drown that bastard in beer next time. Anyhow, I'm off to Japan, you tagging along? Their Emperor is a real bitch, gets me whatever I ask for. Even oinked like a hog when I ordered him."
Marty frowned, his big T-Rex head looking at the young man. "Ruff?"
"Oh, don't tell Mother. I sometimes sneak out. I can fly too, big whoop. But tell me, why the hell does Dad keep plowing half the planet? I don't get it. Though, credit where credit's due, that alien Ajak? Yeah, she's packing some serious gifts. Shame no handy copy of her lying around."
"..."
Marty could smell it. The damn madness reeking from Helvar. The same one that was in Marshall. However, there was a difference. Marshall's madness was curious, fun, and nonchalant. But Helvar's felt… dangerous, unrestrained.
"Growl rwaruff."
"Relax, Uncle Marty. I know my crap. Just fooling about, strangling boredom. It's not like I'm kicking kittens or anything."
But Marty didn't stop looking at the kid. Even when Helvar left, Marty kept staring at that empty seat. He'd lived with Marshall the most, and he'd seen the signs. Marshall never felt scary, no matter what. But Helvar… he felt scared for a moment there.
"Yup, he's gone off the rails."
Marty's head turned to look at the wild man with a wolf-like beard at the bar.
"What? Don't give me that look. Saw the punk at the university a couple of days ago, beating the students bloody. He wanted to sit in that spaceship First Man hauled in. They told him no, so he dropped them, climbed in anyway, and tried flying it. Broke a few parts while he was at it."
Marty frowned and quickly got up. As the temple was made for his size, he easily passed a few halls, lobbies, and found Marshall at the indoor pool, swimming with Hela, Raven, Morgan Le Fay, and Selene. They were all clothed, at least.
"There you are! Jump in, Marty!"
Marty shook his head and growled endlessly, letting out all his worries and doubts, and what he'd heard from Logan just now. Only Marshall and Hela understood him, so they were the first to frown and get out of the pool.
"He beat the students?" Marshall snarled. "That brat! Even I don't screw with their learning. Where is he?"
"Ruff~"
"Japan? Alright."
"Marshall, wait."
"No, Hela. You crack the whip on him, and it's still useless. What he really needs is a skull-rattling smack to remind him he's mortal. He walks around like he can't die just 'cause he's got my blood pumping in him."
"No. I meant you should bring him here before deciding his punishment," Hela said evenly. "It would be unwise to make yourself a spectacle before a crowd."
"Oh, I wasn't about to kick his ass here on earth."
####
Pacific Ocean,
"Ummh… hmm-hm~" Helvar hummed a tune to himself as he flew across the ocean, not a single care in the world. "What should I do this time? Ah, let's get him to present every food known to his country. Hah, if I don't like something, I'll get him to slap himself."
Splash!
Bam!
"You'll do what?!"
Out of nowhere, Marshall came from the ocean below, grabbed Helvar's collar, and pulled him along towards the sky.
"Dad?!"
"Son."
Wooosh!
Marshall kept flying vertically up, passing many layers of atmosphere in seconds before finally pushing towards dark space.
"Is it fun to torment them? Is it fun to beat them? Just because you're bored?" Marshall questioned him.
Helvar's eyes widened. "I… Y-You do it too!"
"No, I don't beat students senseless. I don't set an emperor to grunt like a pig! Yeah, if someone curses you? End them. If someone plots to betray you? End them. If someone damages Dinosia's plans? End them! Still, I don't go about wrecking people for sport."
Helvar frowned and tried to push Marshall's grip off his collar. "But we're gods, aren't we?"
Marshall's eyes became cold, his disappointment so visible that Helvar shrank his neck.
"Gods? Gods my fucking ass. You don't even know what the word means, do you? They slapped the title on me 'cause nobody could put me down. They begged me into divinity 'cause I handed them fire, made them plant seeds instead of chewing bark, and taught them how to stop crawling on their bellies. But I'm no god. I'm just a freak who hits too hard. If that makes me a god, then light a candle and kiss it. But you, what the fuck are you? You think you're strong? Strong enough to head to space in that ship? Then fine, let's fucking see."
Woosh!
Helvar, on the verge of tears, felt the air change. As they entered the real dark, deep space, he couldn't even breathe. His face turned pale, his eyes big and wide. He felt cold, very cold.
"Can't breathe, can you? Pathetic! Truly a god? Are you sure, little brat?" Marshall sneered at his son's face. "You are nothing but a marginally tougher meatbag. Even true Asgardian children are stronger than you. Out there in the dark, a billion savages could kick your skull and grind it into bloody pulp. To them, you're no different from those students—an insect!"
"S-Sorry…"
Marshall sternly nodded and covered his son in his telekinetic shield, finally letting him breathe.
"Do you know how much you made Hela lose her goddamn patience? She barely ever opens her mouth to whine, but you cranked her nerves so hard she begged me to babysit your sorry ass. She's scared you'll trip down the same bloody road she crawled on." Marshall took a slightly softer tone while they flew down to earth again.
"Humans? Weak little glass dolls. You don't owe them jack. But you don't get to smash them around for fun like they're wind-up toys either. You are… Helvar, eating yourself alive. You're a mammoth stomping through an ant farm. Your swollen pride, your bloated ego, it's shoving your brain into a fog of your own bullshit."
Finally, tears slid down Helvar's face. "I'm sorry, Dad."
"As long as your thick skull knows you screwed up, fine, I'll take your damn apology. But you're gonna drag your sorry ass to those students you pounded, buy them something shiny, grip their hands like a decent human, and admit you were acting like a rabid donkey."
"A-and the emperor?"
"Ah, fuck that guy, he really is a bitch." Marshall shrugged. "Anyway, I'm chucking your sorry ass to Asgard tomorrow. You'll find beefy bastards there who can actually swing at you without crying. You'll train with them."
"You mean, Uncle Thor?"
"The shampoo ad? Yeah, he can train you. Only damn thing he's got going are bulging biceps and shiny hair."
Finally, as Helvar calmed down, he started to look around while asking random questions. Like how Marshall could breathe in space. How could he fly that fast and high? How he was so invincible. Marshall told him everything other than the last one. He really didn't know how he became so strong.
"Ah! Dad! Look there, that ship's sinking!"
It was night, and they had seemingly flown down to a random place on Earth. The air was cold, and the sea below had some fog. In the middle of it, there was a massive steel ship, cracked apart in two pieces from the middle. He noticed four boiler exhausts on that ship. It really was massive.
"Oh!"
Something suddenly hit Marshall's brain, like an old memory reignited. From the sky, he looked at the various floating rafts and debris. A lot of people were swimming, screaming in the freezing cold water.
"Build a big-ass raft out of that floating lumber with your telekinesis and fling those soggy bastards onto it." Marshall released his son so he could fly on his own. "About time you earned yourself some angelic name or something."
"Got it, Dad!"
Helvar flew away quickly to get the job done. The moonlight was plenty, thankfully.
Meanwhile, Marshall flew around the ship and quickly found what he was looking for. He hovered low and approached the large wooden plank on which a single woman was lying. Meanwhile, a young man swam in the water, just his head out on that plank. They were crying and kissing.
"Oh, Jack—"
"Shut the fuck up, you sag-titted bitch!" Marshall snarled out of nowhere. He had no idea why his guts boiled in anger, but it spewed out. "Blubbering over a shitty one-night stand you fucked because you were bored, who conveniently dies so you can marry some other loser with deep pockets. Only for you to grow old and cry for 'Oh Jack, my savior', my wrinkled ass misses you—Move the fuck over, hag! There's enough space!"
Marshall grabbed the young boy and placed him on the plank. Yes, the plank still floated on the water just fine.
"See! It ain't sorcery! I goddamn know you plotted his murder to hide that syphilitic Cleopatra pussy of yours!"
"..."
There was silence for a while, broken by someone using a whistle in the distance.
"Ugh... the hell am I pissed for?" Marshall frowned suddenly and floated away. "Jesus, my brain's fucked up. Whatever. Sit tight on the raft. My kid'll haul you out."
"..."
The two young one-night stand lovers stared at the floating god. Though the seed of doubt did rise in the boy's mind.
In mere moments, Helvar lifted the two lovers and threw them on the much larger raft. The raft was already covered with dozens of people. Later, Marshall helped to find the people who had drifted a little too far.
"No! Let me die!"
"..."
However, to Marshall and Helvar's surprise, there was one Japanese man they had saved, who tried to jump into the water again, but the people held him.
"W-What's wrong with him, Dad?"
Marshall scratched his jaw, humming. "Probably wants to commit sudoku or something. Folks in Japan do that a lot. Or maybe he's got a screw loose… more than us."
In the end, Marshall shrugged as the people knocked out the poor Japanese man to save his life.
He flew away with Helvar after making sure nobody was left floating. They didn't bother to check the sunken ship; it was too much work. But counting the number of people on that massive raft, there were hundreds they had saved.
"Dad…"
"What?"
"I feel… amazing! When they thanked me, it felt like… I mattered and…"
Marshall rolled his eyes. "Alright, that's good. But don't go all Superman on me now."
"Superman? Who's that?"
"How the fuck would I know?"
"..."
"But you said it, Dad."
Marshall shrugged. "Kid, half the shit that comes out of my mouth is questionable. Try living a hundred million years, you'll be leaking nonsense too."
Helvar sighed, nodding. He stared at his father as they both flew home. He honestly looked up to him, but at the same time… felt confused. Hela had a father. Marty was an egg. Thor was a baby. But he had no clue about his father's origin. Was he ever a baby?
He asked his mother before, but even she had no clue. He'd once asked his grandpa Odin as well, but even the old man had no clue. The best answer he got was that he just happened.
It made no sense. How could something just happen without an origin?
"Stop thinking that deep, kid."
"Huh? Dad! You were reading my mind?!"
"You make it too damn easy, so of course I would!"
BOOM!
The father and son halted all of a sudden. They were just off the coast of Dinosia when that boom resounded.
BOOM!
Then it echoed again.
"Someone's fighting." Marshall fumed and flew as fast as he could towards the origin. "Head home, Helvar!"
Wooosh!
He broke the sound barrier and appeared at the battlegrounds in the blink of an eye. Thought it was a battlespace since the two fighters were flying in the air.
"Hela!?" Marshall saw Hela floating in the air, her entire battlesuit conjured on her body.
The other woman was dressed in golden armor, a golden winged helmet, with long red hair and red markings around her eyes. She held a sword in her hands. Though she was barely dressed, other than a golden armor-like bra, elbow-length gauntlets, small panties, and thigh-length golden boots, nothing covered her body.
Boom!
The two women were meeting each other to clash their blades, producing a loud noise.
Marshall moved with a snap, getting between them right before they could strike again. He grabbed both their blades with his bare hands and kept them frozen in one spot.
"What the hell's going on?" He asked Hela. "Who is she?"
"My sister… I believe!"
"Sister? This redhead?" Marshall stared at the red-haired, fiery woman, just as tall as him, her body rather slim despite her breasts being so full.
"Are you… The First Man?" the woman asked, gritting her teeth as she failed to pull her sword from the man's grip.
"Who's asking?"
"I'm Angela, from Heven… You must…" She never stopped fighting Marshall's grip. "You must… act! Heven is going to invade Midgard!"
"Why?"
"There is little time! M-Malekith plans a War of the Realms! You must act!"
"Milk-teeth? Who's that?"
"..."
Angela frowned, shocked by the lack of concern the man showed. She looked at Hela for help but found herself even more speechless. Instead of annoyance, she saw fondness in Hela's gaze as she looked at the First Man.
"H-He's a Dark Elf, he's e—"
"Dark Elf? The hell is that? Woman, I ain't here to get stamped as some cosmic racist jackass. I don't hurt black people… not since I let them settle in my Mammoth farm."
"..."
Angela frowned, her eyes wide in pure helplessness.
Shhhhh~
And just then, a massive portal appeared not far from them. It looked like a bifrost beam, but it was dark in color.
"Damn it!" Angela cursed.
From that portal, a small army of women appeared, all of them with wings. At the front was a tall, brown haired woman in red and gold armor, matching Angela's.
"So you're here, Angela?" the leading woman smugly voiced, confidence brimming.
"Q-Queen… of Angels!" Angela shouted to alert the rest. Thankfully, she felt her sword become loose. Though what happened next was more absurd. "Don't!"
To her shock, the First Man went floating towards the Queen of Angels.
"Stop! Hela, stop him!" Angela shouted, but only received a shrug from the Goddess of Death. "He'll d—"
"Goddamn!"
Angela froze at the First Man's words.
"Queen of Angels? Fuck that, Queen of titanic fuck-pillow milk wagons is more like it! Look at 'em! Sweet hell, I'd drown happy in that cleavage swamp! Um-hmm!"
"..."
"Jesus Christ, you could smother a whole village with that rack and I'd still say thank you!"
No, it wasn't just Angela.
Even the Queen of Angels froze.
___________________
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