Chapter 142: Chuck - I Want to Eat General Tso's Chicken
"Hi," Joey walked in looking dejected.
"Look, the Italian guy is here!" Chandler, as usual, immediately used the information he'd just learned, waved at Joey jokingly, and motioned everyone to look at him.
"There's the Italian guy's gay roommate," Phoebe laughed.
"Enough! This is the normal reaction when people hear that someone has passed away! They don't think of money or themselves first! They feel regret first! Just like Joey!" Monica preached to everyone, her eyes lingering on Rachel and Chandler. Rachel, who'd thought of money first, hung her head.
Chandler, who'd thought of his lonely death first, sat on the sofa in despair, not caring about Monica's gaze at all.
Joey puffed out his chest under Monica's approving look before asking the crucial question: "Who died?"
"..." Monica's mouth twitched. "Didn't you know Mr. Heckles died? Then why do you look so sad?"
"Oh," at the mention of this, Joey's face darkened and he said dejectedly, "My role in the movie fell through."
"What?" "Oh no! We were waiting to see you on the big screen."
His friends immediately expressed their disappointment.
"Why?" Ross was puzzled. He glanced at Chuck and said meaningfully, "Is it because the Gambino family is under investigation that the movie is in trouble?"
Everyone immediately looked at Chuck.
"Yeah!" Joey's eyes lit up and he pointed. "That's it."
"Is that so?" Chuck looked at Joey.
"I'm not really sure," Joey wanted to nod directly, but when he met Chuck's calm gaze, he suddenly looked away guiltily. "That's what the rumors say."
"That must be the reason," Ross had always disliked Chuck and immediately pressed, "Joey's acting is so good, he's just always lacked an opportunity. Since he passed the audition and his agent agreed, even if they wanted to scam Joey, they would have signed him already. What other reason could there be except that the movie was suddenly stopped due to funding? This is an important turning point in Joey's career."
"As far as I know, the movie is still being filmed," Chuck nodded. "If this is true, it means someone is laundering money through movie production. I'll have the IRS agents follow up."
"Don't," Joey was startled and quickly waved his hands. "I just heard rumors. Those might not be accurate."
"You're wrong," Chuck shook his head. "Rumors are the most accurate. Haven't you seen how all sorts of important news starts as anonymous insider gossip? Don't worry, these things are always accurate when you investigate them. They're very professional."
"I was wrong! I lost the role!" Joey couldn't hold it in anymore and told the truth. "The director fired me!"
"What?" Ross was stunned. "Why?"
"Because I was overacting..." Joey hesitated, trying to cover up. "My idea was that my character was very sad. His wife died, his brother disappeared. I wanted to portray quiet despair. Is that wrong?"
He even performed a scene.
"You understood it perfectly, and you acted very well too," Ross was puzzled.
"Really?" Joey was delighted by Ross's approval and pointed at him. "Too bad the director didn't give me any chance to show it. He just told me not to clench my butt muscles."
"What does that have to do with butt muscles?" Chandler quipped. "They're filming your face, not your rear end."
"Well..." Joey hesitated.
"No way?" Rachel was stunned, then burst out laughing. "You weren't playing a butt double, were you?"
"Okay," seeing the cat was out of the bag, Joey had no choice but to come clean. "I was playing a butt double, but it was Al Pacino's butt. When he was filming the shower scene, it was actually me."
At this point, he clasped his hands together and pleaded with Chuck, "This is the truth. Please don't let the IRS investigate, or my acting career will be completely over."
Anyone in the entertainment industry knows they can't withstand an investigation.
If the IRS targeted Joey because of him, he'd become famous in the industry, but it would be infamy—the kind that would definitely end his career.
"Alright," Chuck nodded.
"Thank you, thank you," Joey said happily.
"You're welcome," Chuck said matter-of-factly. "I'm doing this for Al Pacino's sake, butthead."
"Butthead?" Everyone was stunned, then burst into laughter.
"I'm famous for my face, but you were almost famous for your butt. Your nickname really fits," Chandler teased.
"Oh, that's killing me," Rachel said, holding her sides and hugging Phoebe, laughing heartily.
"..." Joey's face darkened completely.
He'd had a premonition his friends would laugh at him when he took the role, but he hadn't expected that premonition was only a small part of it. Now he had to bear such a shameful nickname.
"Don't be upset," Monica tried hard to hold back her laughter and explained on Chuck's behalf, "My little cousin gets called that by his mom at home. It's actually an affectionate nickname."
"It's fine," Joey made a bitter face, walked over to Chandler, sat down, and imitated Chandler's look of despair.
"Don't be like this—there will be another chance next time. We all believe you'll be famous," Monica comforted him.
"I hope so," Joey said dejectedly. "I just want to do my role well. I even got fired as a butt double this time. Will I really be able to act well next time I have to show my face?"
"Of course you can," Chandler teased. "Acting is all about the face. You're not showing your face, and you're trying to use your butt to convey facial expressions. That's obviously taking on the most challenging task right from the start."
At this point, he slapped his forehead and pretended to have a sudden realization. "I've got an idea. If you had asked Chuck to paint a face on your butt, it would have been much easier. With the strength and uniqueness of your butt-face, you'd have been a huge hit."
Rachel and the others burst out laughing again.
Joey glared at his roommate Chandler.
Chuck glanced at Chandler.
"Okay, don't be sad," Monica said, smoothing things over. "Joey, what do you want to eat? I'll make it for you right now."
"Fried chicken, man!" The mention of food immediately lifted Joey's spirits.
To him, the two most important things in life were romance and food. Acting and becoming famous were just about making money so he could pursue those two things.
"Now that you mention it, I want to try Los Pollos Hermanos too." "Me too. Los Pollos isn't as famous as KFC, but it's delicious and cheaper." "It started small in New Mexico and built itself up to become a chain. Now it has more locations than anywhere else, second only to KFC. They must be doing something right."
Everyone got excited at the mention of Los Pollos Hermanos.
"Okay, let's order from Los Pollos," Monica said, noting everyone's enthusiasm. She picked up the phone to call. This wasn't their first time ordering from there.
After they'd placed their orders, Monica whispered to Chuck, "What do you want?"
"Seriously?" Rachel scoffed. "Let's just have Los Pollos together. Are you going to cook separately just for Chuck?"
"Chuck doesn't eat junk food," Monica explained.
"Does that mean we're all eating junk?" Ross grumbled.
"It's purely personal preference. Just make yourself happy," Chuck glanced at Ross, then said to Monica, "I want General Tso's chicken."
"..." Everyone was stunned at first, then they all burst into laughter. They looked at Chandler, whose face went pale, only to see him jump up and shout, "No General Tso's chicken! No mention of General Tso's chicken!"
"Hahaha," Rachel laughed, holding her stomach. "Chuck, are you doing this on purpose? Ow, ow, I'm dying of laughter."
"No," Chuck shook his head. Under Chandler's intense stare, he said seriously, "I like Chinese food. Every time I finish a case, I really want to have a plate of General Tso's chicken."
"Hahaha!" Another burst of laughter.
If everyone was unsure at first, then once these words were spoken, even though Chuck remained expressionless as always, everyone clearly sensed Chuck's joke and teasing.
You know, not long ago, Chandler's mother, Mrs. Bing, had come to visit her son and, during a television interview, uttered this famous line: "Afterwards, I always crave General Tso's chicken!"
Chandler's face had turned green, and he'd yelled at his mother, who was speaking freely on TV, "TMI, Mom!"
At this moment, Chandler's face turned green again, and he looked at Chuck in disbelief, self-deprecatingly saying, "Don't you dare tell me you're my new dad!"
The laughter intensified.
Monica, laughing, suddenly felt something was off. She had met Mrs. Bing before. Although she was in her fifties, her ageless beauty, impressive figure, captivating presence, and celebrity status surpassed many young and beautiful women.
Suddenly, she didn't find it funny anymore.
Chuck just stared at Chandler without saying anything.
"No!!!" Chandler stared back at Chuck. After a moment of this staring contest, he couldn't help but let out a cry of terror.
"I know I've told you that you should yell 'Mom!' when frightened," Chuck said, "but yelling 'Dad!' is more appropriate right now."
"Hahaha," this time, only Rachel and Phoebe were laughing.
Chandler and Monica were beyond words. Ross despised (envied) (admired) Chuck from the bottom of his heart since it was a matter of personal interest. Joey, however, was still kindhearted. He laughed a few times then quickly covered his mouth.
"You're still laughing!" Chandler looked at Rachel and Phoebe angrily.
"Don't worry," Phoebe smiled and waved her hands. "Chuck was just joking. Who told you to suggest painting faces on Joey's butt?"
At this point, she secretly winked at Chandler, meaning, "Chuck holds grudges."
(End of Chapter)
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