"""""WOOOOOOOOOAAAAAHHHH!!!!"""""
"Play every instrument we've got! Every man, raise a war cry!!"
"Scream! Use your diaphragms!!"
"That's not enough—"
"Zzz... Zzz..."
"Cú Chulainn isn't waking up at all—!!!"
Once Cú Chulainn falls asleep, not even thirty burly men can rouse him.
"Call in the death row inmates!!"
"They're mocking me. Do they expect me, a brave warrior, to whisper sweet nothings to him?"
"Just do it!"
"Hey! Wake the hell u—"
"The prisoner!? His skull's been crushed in!"
It is faster for him to crack the skull of the person waking him than to actually wake up. Therefore, only a condemned criminal or a fellow hero can wake Cú Chulainn.
"What on earth do we do...!"
"Enemy attack! Enemy attack!"
"——The hell's wrong with you lot! I told you to wake me up!!"
However, if it is an enemy attack, he springs to his feet instantly.
"Right! Time for some morning exercise!"
——And so, wiping out the enemy force single-handedly is a daily occurrence.
"What the hell! Don't wake me up for small fry! I'm going back to sleep! Make sure you wake me next time!"
(Return to Start)
"C-Cú Chulainn is incredible...! As a Caster myself, I couldn't possibly pull that off..."
"No, I think that's impossible for anyone, Romani."
"Ah, er... Queen? Is that... your preferred type of man?"
"I think Cú Chulainn is wonderful~♪ If we compiled his legend, surely it would become a best-seller!"
"R-Right... Yeah, totally..."
"But—my absolute favorite type is someone like Romani Archaman~♥"
"A-Awawah, th-thank you! Yes!"
"Ufufu♥ Now, now, back to work, back to work♥"
"Ah, this coffee is sweet..."
"Director, that's black coffee."
"Silence, Meuniere! It's this situation that's so sweet I can't stand it! Why? Why can't I Rejoice as skillfully as Gil does~?!"
『Anyway, I'm fine! Take care of the place while I'm gone, Alter!』
"Understood. Stay safe, Rikka."
『Byeee!』
"My... You two have become quite close, haven't you, Lady Alter?"
"W-Well? I do pride myself on being her 'Mabudachi'—her bestie. Yes."
"My, my... Well then."
『Door Lock』
"I was hoping you might share various stories with me..."
"Eep—"
"Is that anime? Why are you sitting in seiza to watch it, Hercules?"
"Sensei... No, Rikka told me, 'I want to invent a Nine Lives that is mine alone!'"
"Hoh. She seems capable of pulling off most techniques... but is she using this as a reference?"
"A reference, or perhaps a request... She gave me a specific proposal."
"Specific...?"
"She wants me to turn the 'Hell's Nine-Point Seal' used by Akuma Shogun in Kinnikuman into my Nine Lives..."
"——I-Is that so..."
"Shouldn't it be One Punch Man!? It's gotta be One Punch Man!!"
"Achilles, even you..."
"You gotta One Punch 'em with a strike full of guts and seriousness!!"
"...I see. That is a logical attack strategy..."
"A 'Curse the Grail' Lancer?! Was there a 'Curse the Grail' Lancer?! Good for you! The Grail was cursed! My wish was nothing but disasters! No one was saved! Good for you, 'Curse the Grail' Lancer! Instead of the Beautiful Lancer, why not rename yourself the Lancer of Curses and Grudges?! The King of Jealousy and Old Age, and the Knight of Curses and Resentment! The Knights of Fianna are great, aren't they! I like them! It's a shame I wasn't a Saber!"
"Artoria! Stop it, Artoria!"
"Father! Stay, Father! Stay!!"
"MOOOOLEEEEE!!!"
"...Good grief. Is that truly just another aspect of myself...?"
"Look at this, Coal Tar Woman."
『The Me Who Died 1,000,000 Times』
"I'm thinking of making a book collecting the death scenes caused by the sheer preciousness of Ea! The 1,000,000 patterns of Ea's preciousness and Me! The Me defeated 1,000,000 times! It'll be a personal best-seller! Ah, I remembered the preciousness (Turns into Rainbow Crystal)."
"We haven't been comparing lately, have we, Fou-senpai?"
"That Beast of Comparison died ages ago! What exists here is something that nestles close to the one and only preciousness. If I had to compare, I'm a Precious Stand? (Smug)"
『You jerked off 1,000,000 times to this, didn't you?』
"Is that it? Senpai?"
"I will kill you for all eternity."
"Y-Yes! I'm sorry!"
"Good grief... Ea, you see, just being together is enough. That is the truth——"
Sixth Singularity
『...』
"In every region, mysterious existences have been summoned and are hindering the Selection, My King."
『...I see.』
"How shall we deal with them?"
『Let them do as they please. Let the Knights handle them as a playful diversion. ——That is their final radiance before they burn out. I will not be so unrefined as to snuff it out.』
"Yes."
『——I am proud of your struggle. Of your radiance. That is why——it must remain, eternally...』
"Pharaoh!! Just... just—! Pharaoh——!!"
"I forgive it!! I forgive everything!! Prepare to accept them and the refugees they saved! My divine territory, my domain! I grant special permission for its liberation!!"
"Wh-What, Pharaoh!?"
"Hurry!! Know that to render the struggles of heroes meaningless is a foolish act that stains the name of the Sun that is We!!"
"Y-Yes, sir!!"
Seventh Singularity
"How goes the dismantling of the city and the construction of the fortress?"
"It is proceeding smoothly. It should take shape in a few months."
"That fool, sending reinforcements whether he knows the situation or not! Do not rely on the surplus! We shall simply do our utmost! That said, casually send food to them! And if you spot them in Uruk, casually overlook them! Casually, I said!"
"Yes, King Gilgamesh——"
"However——even if all of Uruk is united, the result will be——"
"...?"
"——Enough, forget it! Make haste and set foot in Uruk, Hero Princess! For the key to complete victory is none other than you——!"
The Gorgeous Inspection & The Cú Chulainn Talk
Having formed a bond with Diarmuid and Fionn mac Cumhaill, Cú Chulainn—along with Rikka—made a triumphant return.
"Oh, Cú Chulainn! You're back! That was quite an early—no, a fast return!"
Upon returning to the refugee camp, they found that every injured person had been fully healed or treated.
"May Grandfather... May the Great God Lugh bless you all!"
"Th-Thank you so much...!"
Surrounding Mash and Connla, arm in arm, people were applauding with tears in their eyes.
"What's all the racket?"
Ferdiad slaps the bewildered Cú Chulainn heartily on the shoulder, laughing.
"Ah, while you and Master Rikka were out scouting, Connla and Lady Mash kept singing. Loeg and I got carried away and kept playing along..."
"It seems everyone is captivated by your son and the snowflake girl. ...Being popular is the ultimate honor for a parent, isn't it, Sétanta?"
Loeg chuckles, looking amused. His laugh is dark, but there is no sarcasm or scorn in it. This is his way of praising.
"I wonder if Aoife or my old man would be confused if they saw this... Thinking, 'There's no way my son could be this cute' or something."
"I know of this. It is modern knowledge... called a 'Ranobe' (Light Novel), yes?"
"I heard Master and the pirates making noise about it. ...Wait, why do you know that?"
"When one works as a charioteer, one feels the urge to indulge in literature."
Leaving those words behind, Loeg retreated to the waiting area for Liath Macha and Dub Sainglend to adjust the chariot.
"...Master went off with Goldie to decide our next policy, too."
"""Encore! Encore! Encore!"""
"Thank you very much! Connla will do her best! Now, Ms. Mash! Let's do this!"
"Training to strengthen the vocal cords and master abdominal breathing... Yes! I'll do it! Connla-san!"
"Yes! Now, everyone, together~!"
""""Let's☆Cycle—!""""
"Hahahaha! You're really into it, Connla! Go on, do it! There were too many things you couldn't do back then, after all!"
Cú Chulainn waves Cruaidín like a glow stick, beaming with a full smile.
"Woooooooooooah!!"
Beside him, Ferdiad suddenly bursts into manly tears.
"Shut up! What's with you all of a sudden!"
"Good for you, Connla! Good for you, Cú Chulainn! As a friend, as a man! I cannot help but weep with joy at your happiness! I cannot!!"
"I get it, I get it, so stop crying, it's pathetic..."
"Umu! Umu! Hurry up and push Medb-chan down and become lovers so we can all have a feast! WOOOOAH! LET'S! CYCLE!!"
"You're honest with yourself in a different vector than Fergus, aren't you... Yawn."
Before he finishes speaking, Cú Chulainn yawns, sits down in the shade of a nearby tree, and closes his eyes.
"I'm gonna sleep a bit. Wake me when we move out."
"No, no, wait, wait! Everyone living in Celtic lands knows how fast you fall asleep and how bad your sleeping posture is—"
"Zzz..."
Listening to Connla's voice, gently wrapped in the setting sun, Cú Chulainn dozed off... falling asleep in the exact same amount of time it took him to defeat Diarmuid and Fionn.
"Well now... haha, this is, well."
With a bitter smile and a drop of sweat:
"Must I prepare myself for death to do this?"
Ferdiad muttered refreshingly...
Meanwhile, in a corner of the tent
"Right then!"
Gil, Nightingale, and Rikka were discussing where to head next.
"Where should we go next?"
『Let's see... It would be best to leave that area before you get pursued again.』
"Hmm," Olga Marie ponders from the other side of the comms.
『Well, regarding combat power—or rather, self-defense—you're perfectly secure. I think you'll be fine wherever you go. Though, strictly speaking, "storming into Celtic territory" is too dangerous, so I'm stopping you there.』
"That said, our destination is limited. Either we go to harm the forces opposing the Celts, or we crush the resistance. Since they recognize Cú Chulainn as the supreme enemy, if we are to reinforce our war potential, standard strategy suggests we speak to the leaders or heads of these factions."
"Personally, I have a modicum of interest in the one claiming to be King who opposes the Western Celts. A King who struggles while upholding the trivial creed that mass production and development are good. I wouldn't mind seeing his face."
—If he calls himself a King, he cannot avoid the King of Heroes' assessment. In that case, the King wishes to head to the White... President House.
"That is merely my personal impression. Well, it is incredibly frail and unreliable, but siding with the resistance could also be an amusing path. But I do not truly care. Whichever path we take, the proposition that Cú Chulainn must be slain is unavoidable."
—In the end, the King doesn't care where we go.
...That helps me, actually. Since we're in the middle of searching for the original texts of 'Curse Removal' and 'Transfer', I'd prefer to avoid fighting if possible. I'd like us to choose negotiation, but...
Well, when the time comes, I just have to hand over the two original texts while sorting through the Treasury.
"Ea. If you can do that, then there is no need to worry at all, is there?"
—?
(Ea, boasting that she can type on a keyboard with her right hand while using a calculator with her left as if it's natural. Fufu, you've become quite confident!)
—If I can't handle a reckless task like that, I can't possibly stay by the King of Heroes' radiance... No.
(?)
I can't possibly protect Fou and everyone else! One or two reckless feats are nothing! So Fou, trust in me and the King of Heroes, as if you were on a great ship! Ahem! ...Just kidding.
Having struck a pose, she feels embarrassed. Blushing slightly, she pets Fou.
—A-Anyway. I will protect Fou and everyone. That is the truth, the absolute truth!
(Ah—Ea... I wuv you so much...)
Struck by rainbow lightning, Fou turns into seven-colored ash.
—Fou!?
"Now then, I wonder how high the count of Beast subjugations will rise before this journey ends."
"Fuhahahaha," the spirit laughs in high spirits. These three never change, no matter where they are.
"Dr. Rikka. Permission to make a proposal."
Correcting her posture with a snap, Nightingale speaks.
"Go ahead!"
"I propose that you, as a doctor, should know the overview of the pathogen—the focus of the disease spreading this war that threatens the world."
『? Doctor? Rikka-kun was a doctor?』
『Romani, stay silent.』
"We should secure the removal of the malignant tumor known as the Celts... however, I believe there is still room for dialogue and treatment regarding the soldiers here—the regular army."
—?
"I see, I see. In other words, Nightingale wants to say that there is room for discussion with the Western forces, so if we can talk to their top brass, we should."
"Correct, Doctor. Regardless of right or wrong, unless we learn and grasp the type of disease, its condition, and the treatment method, curing the world will not come true."
『Ah, that's what you meant!? Eh!? You understood that, Rikka-kun!?』
『Not a unified language, but a medical language... Fufu, you said that quite skillfully, didn't you? Just kidding♥』
Caster of Midrash laughs mischievously.
『Right, a medical language! I never thought it would be used for communication!』
『...I've calculated the position. With the speed of the Vimana and the Chariot, you should arrive immediately.』
"Thank you! Okay then—let's go meet the top dog of America!"
"This is convenient for me as well. The concept of 'King' is my exclusive patent. I must extort an exorbitant patent fee from the fellows borrowing it without permission in the most gorgeous manner!"
—I-I see! Now that you mention it, that is a natural conclusion! The one who established the word 'King' is undeniably the King!
"Indeed! Let's see, turning that 'President House' or whatever into a 'Gorgeous House' wouldn't be bad either! If we do that, we can push back the Celts in the blink of an eye! Fuhahahaha! Know that a half-baked existence cannot hope to cover my billing!"
—Alright! Let's take it to court! Total war on the prestige of the King!
(You get so excited when it comes to him, don't you... Ah, so precious... You're fine just as you are. You are a one-and-only existence possessing a Precious Body housing an innocent soul, with a mind as young as Connla-kun-chan's...)
Fou becomes a gust of wind.
—Fou—!?
"Are you going, Missy?"
The ones muttering regretfully are the soldiers who were once wounded.
"Yes! Connla and Mash-Mash must go!"
"...I'm sorry. Showing a war like this to such a small child..."
"Forgive us pathetic adults. We really shouldn't show children anything but a peaceful world."
"No! Connla feels proud! Of all of you, who fight so gallantly and proudly despite being human!"
"Connla-san...!"
"Please, fight to the end! To protect whatever is precious to you! I bless your path and cheer for you from the bottom of my heart! I'll leave behind supplies from Lord B-Vin-sama, so please take care!"
Peko, Connla bows her head, her long light-blue hair swaying.
"May the blessings of the Great God Lugh be upon you all! Let's Cycle!"
"""""Let's Cycle————!!!"""""
"Uhyaa~?!"
Overcome with emotion, the soldiers toss Connla high into the air.
"Everyone! Everyone! Connla must go! Connla must go~!"
Ferdiad looks affectionately at Connla, who looks embarrassed but happy to be at their mercy.
"Umu, umu! Truly 'Let's Cycle'! Indeed! Now! Cú Chulainn! Wake up! Cú Chulainn!"
"Zzz..."
Even though Ferdiad shakes him, there is no sign of Cú Chulainn waking up.
"Mmm, must I prepare thirty men and make a racket after all...?"
"Aniki, Aniki! Sorry to keep you waiting! It's time! Let's go!"
"Father~! Connla and the others are departing! We are departing~!"
At the voices of the two girls:
"Right! Shall we get going then!"
Cú Chulainn jumps up instantly.
"Huh? What are you doing, Ferdiad?"
Seeing Cú Chulainn blinking his eyes:
"Ha—Hahahahaha!! Good! That's good, Cú Chulainn! I'm envious! Being woken up by a daughter and a young girl is terribly enviable! I want to be woken up gently too! Come, we depart! To battle!"
Ferdiad laughs heartily.
"Ah—right, I was napping. Is the plan decided?"
"Yeah! We're going to see the face of the top dog at the President House!"
"Right! Let's go then!"
"Father~! Connla didn't know being tossed in the air felt so good~!"
"What the hell is going on!?"
"By the by, Cú Chulainn. I know not the reason, but the current Connla is a young maiden. Staying in light-blue tights forever is too pitiable—no, I could say that the immature body lines standing out are wonderful, YES!! But?"
Ferdiad mutters refreshingly, with a straight face.
"I'm gonna shove Gáe Bolg up your ass and skewer your guts."
Laughing, Cú Chulainn references Ferdiad's cause of death in life.
"No, no, listen to the end. Look, Connla is too young, right? She has a future, right?"
"Yeah, unlike a certain someone acting young."
"Spats, or something... A healthy outfit should suit her. Can't you do something about a costume or two for your son—er, daughter, Cú Chulainn?"
"You're being awful considerate, ain't ya, Ferdiad."
To Cú Chulainn's teasing tone, Ferdiad cheerfully thumps his chest.
"Of course I am! It's my best friend's son! I'll be as considerate as I can! He's a woman now, after all! Yep!"
"Keh, I can't let Fergus see this for the life of me. Alright, alright. I'll do something with Runes."
"Do that, do that! Hahaha! Then let's go! Loeg is waiting!"
"Gil~! Mash and Nightingale got on the Vimana~!"
"Good! Cú Chulainn! Connla! Ferdiad! What are you doing, get on quickly!"
"Yeah, yeah, I got it! Come on, Connla! We're leaving you behind!"
"W-Wait! Everyone! Put me doooown!"
""""Let's Cycle——!""""
"Waaaaah! I can't stop~!"
After this, everyone was knocked unconscious by Cú Chulainn's forehead flick.
"Now, let us go!! Vimana!! Launch!!"
The throne that runs through the sky, Vimana, soars through the American sky.
"Go, go—! Vimana, Liath Macha, and Dub Sainglend are the third and second fastest in the world—!"
Witnessing the exploits of Aniki sent by the club members, Connla smiles with unbridled joy.
She has changed from Celtic tights into spats, a short skirt, and light-blue upper garb. Her hair, long enough to reach her waist, is tied in a ponytail.
——Inadvertently, it was a light-blue version of the outfit worn by a girl Cú Chulainn once met and acknowledged as a "good woman" (Bazett).
The Scythe Chariot of Slaughter sprints across the earth, carrying the heroes.
"What's wrong, Loeg? Why are you crying?"
"Clannad is life."
Loeg, who got deeply addicted to Chaldea's library and dedicated himself to literature, mutters.
"Vroom!! (Run! Run! We are!)"
"Neigh! (We run!)"
And waiting ahead is——
"Ora ora! I'm leaving you lot behind! Shape up, shape up!"
Ulster's representative, the greatest warrior, Cú Chulainn!
"Warping is a no-no! No good! Gil-sama—!"
"Fuhahahahaha!! I know! I shall refrain from Gorgeous Play! Now run, run! Our battle has only just begun——!"
—Someday, let's run through a vast land like this on a bike, Fou! Watched over by the King, just the two of us!
(Yeah! (Dares not to disappear))
"Aniki and the Vimana are super faaaast!!"
"It is optimal for transporting emergency patients..."
The King-led group of mad dogs storms into the President House——!
...Changing location: The President House
"Karna-kun! Madame! I'm counting on you! I'm counting on you on the prestige of Direct Current! No matter what, no matter what, persuade King Gilgamesh and the Shining Cú Chulainn not to turn into enemies!"
A mysterious man, his muscles trembling like a small animal.
"Yes, yes, don't be scared. They defeated Diarmuid and Fionn mac Cumhaill, after all. And they protected the refugees and the wounded. This is an exploit that would make even Mahatma smile!"
A petite girl soothes him.
"If we hold sincerity and conviction, conflict can surely be avoided. ...Though my assessment is likely unreliable..."
A white-haired young man mutters humbly.
"Th-That's right! Exactly! Umu! They are definitely not agents of Psycho AC Scum AC! We can surely understand each other! Presidentially!!"
"——That will not be easy for you as you are now... but I shall endeavor to avoid a rupture."
"Alright! Then, Madame! Karna-kun! Go persuade them immediately...!!"
"Terrible! President, I have a report!"
A mechanical soldier rushes in frantically.
"What is it!?"
"G-Gilgamesh and Cú Chulainn, mentioned in the report, are...!!"
"What? What happened?"
"St—Straight for us! They are coming to this President House!!"
"——"
The young man is speechless.
"Yes—!?"
The girl is astonished.
"GAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!?"
The... person-like thing screams.
In that instant——
"KONNICHIWA—!!!"
Utilizing jet-black mud to pulverize the wall and glass, Rikka enters wearing Minimum Azi Dahaka Armor.
"I am Fujimaru Rikka! I like communication and subculture in general! I dislike prejudice and things that unreasonably steal the future! My motto is 'If there is a will, I'll make friends even with God'!"
Equipped with a shield, fur, and mud, laughing cheerfully—humanity's last hope, Rikka.
"——That is a good introduction."
The young man grins.
"Fuhahahahahahahahahahaha!! Bow your heads!! You are in the presence of the King!!"
The King of Heroes among Heroes descends solemnly upon the President House. Gilgamesh.
"A-A radiance that pushes back even Mahatma—!?"
The girl widens her eyes.
And then——
"Hup!"
Killing his momentum and impact completely, landing gently is...
"C-Cú Chulainn——!!!"
Screaming with a voice that sounds like a death rattle.
"Yo! Don't worry, I won't eat ya! Let's just have a little chat! Ah, I half-killed the soldiers who pointed weapons at me, so my bad."
Laughing heartily is the Mad Dog of the Clan, Cú Chulainn.
The greatest, strongest war potential holding the fate of America now converses with the President Lion——!!
NEW Legend of Cú Chulainn
His best friend and the representative hero of Connaught braced himself for death just to wake him up for a nap.
The Great President King responsible for America trembled in true fear at Cú Chulainn alone. (He refused to acknowledge Gilgamesh).
When they tried to send ambassadors to the camp hundreds of kilometers away to persuade them, they came to him. A throne soaring through the sky, a giant chariot running across the earth, and one on foot.
To ensure a fair discussion, he displayed the wit to put down his weapons, half-kill the fortress's entire military force with his bare hands beforehand, and set up a peaceful negotiation table. This is called "Cú Chulainn's Talk."
"...Slurping udon, dozing off, and waking up to find a strange, vast land..."
"Humph!! Haaah!!!"
"And right before my eyes is a personage embodying the Divine Spear——Buddha!! There's a limit to being absurd!! Where on earth is this————!!!!!"
"Cú Chulainn. This is an aside, but in the distant future, Master will encounter Kotomine."
"Seriously? I decided this back when I used the Grail... but I'll stick around even after the Human Order is restored. As a watchdog."
"Good. Then I shall transfer the contract to that earring. Lend me your ear."
"Owowowowow!! Don't pull on it!! It doesn't come off!!"
-------------------------------
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