"I - we're not a good match," she said, averting her gaze. "There's too much going on. With Astoria, with school, with the future of our family business, and with the Dark Lord returning. I suppose it's similar to what you were saying before. I- I don't want to have any more weaknesses they can exploit. And-"
Finally, she looked at Blake, and he saw tears forming in her eyes.
"I don't want to feel like I did last year ever again."
For the first in his life, Blake finally understood what the expression 'it felt like a dagger to the chest' meant.
"I'm not blaming you," she quickly said, having seen the look on his face. "But there's already so much that I have to do - that I have to be prepared for - if I slip up like I did last year… I can't, Blake. The stakes are too high now."
"But," he said pathetically, blinking back tears despite himself. God, he thought numbly. I didn't even cry when Dad died, but here? I really am pathetic. "I won't-"
"Maybe," she interrupted him, shutting her eyes. "But that's not something you can promise now. And honestly, it's not something that I can promise you, either. You have so much that you need to do too, Blake. And if I somehow got in the way of that… I don't know what I'd do. I'm sorry."
She looked at him imploringly, as if she was begging and praying that he'd understand. And he did. But that didn't make it feel any better.
Grow up, he chided himself, despite the cold, stabbing yet somehow dull feeling in his chest. After how you treated her, you have no right.
"You've got nothing to apologise for," he told her firmly, ignoring everything else, and he felt his eyes were no longer watery.
"It makes sense, and it's a perfectly good decision - for both of us."
She looked startled for a second.
"But-"
"No," he said, even firmer this time. "There's no need for any guilt or sadness. You're.. You're still my friend. You'll always be my friend. That's enough for me."
Liar.
Daphne's tears began to flow silently, and Blake continued to do his best to ignore the ache in his bones.
"You don't have to cry," he told her gently, taking her hand across the table. "It's going to be fine. I promise."
She nodded, wiping her face, before standing up.
"We- we should go," she said quietly. "Muggles are staring."
"Right," he said, settling the bill and leading her outside. It was sunnier now, with a slight breeze - perfect weather, according to him and Daphne both. Blake resisted the urge to snort. It was like the world was spitting in his face.
"Do you know where you're going?" he asked her. "The way back?"
"Kipler arranged a car to come and pick me up," she said.
"A car?" he repeated, smiling suddenly. "Daphne Greengrass is travelling by car?"
"How did you think I got here?" she replied, smiling too. As they bickered, it was as if nothing had even happened; as if neither of their worlds had just been shattered by a conversation a few minutes ago.
Eventually, the car pulled up beside them - a limo, of course. Blake opened the door for her.
"I'll see you at school then?" he asked.
She nodded, before stepping closer to him. Almost subconsciously, Blake reached out at the same time as she did, and they embraced each other for a few seconds that felt like eternity to Blake, before she pulled away.
"I'll see you, Blake," she whispered, before leaning in, and planting a chaste kiss on his lips. She got in the door slowly, and Blake shut the door behind her.
He watched as the car sped off, and stood in that same spot for almost an hour.
"It's going to be fine." "I promise."
What a lie.
BACK TO THE PRESENT MOMENT
"You said my reasons were good!" she finally snapped back. "Were you lying then?"
"No," he retorted. "They are, so why are you bothering me about Susan?"
"I never said I didn't care!"
"We're not together, right?"
"Because of you!" she shouted back. Blake was in a stunned silence for a moment.
"So-" he began.
"Oh, shut up," she said, rolling her eyes. "Not because of last year! You didn't even try to argue for us!"
"What?" he hissed back. "You're talking about not trying? You literally said-"
"My reasons were logically right - but if you'd asked - if you'd said anything, I would've-"
"So what? You wanted me to beg for you?"
"No, I wanted you to fight for us!" she said, angry tears beginning to form in her eyes. "You thought us being together was a liability, didn't you? That's the root cause of the problems we had last year too, and clearly you still think that! You proved it when you agreed with me in the coffee shop! Why do you think I said that?"
"So you were testing me?" Blake shot back.
"Yes, I was!" she retorted. "I know you would've said yes to us being together if I agreed to it, but I needed to know that you didn't think our relationship would be a burden! I don't want to be a burden!"
Both of them were silent.
"Obviously you've been a burden on me, Daphne."
"W-What?"
"Of course you have," he said, rolling his eyes. "And I've been one on you."
"What are you trying to say?" she snapped. "Stop with this philosophical-"
"Listen to me," he said, grabbing her arm, and pulling her in closer. "Everybody I love is a burden to me, and I am a burden to them. Same with you. But so what? So what? I chose them, and they chose me, because it's worth it. D'you see Astoria in the same way? Is Astoria a burden? Of course she is! That's just a fact! But does that mean that she's not worth your love? Your companionship or your trust or your care? Does it mean that you're not a burden on her? Because if you think you're not, you're wrong! That's just the nature of having any type of connection with anyone! So, unless you plan on living by yourself for the rest of your life, stop this bullsh*t!"
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