I looked around for a bit, giving my slow brain some time to process what had just happened. After a moment, I said, "F*ck it, let's go in!"
Before entering, I took off my shoes. I was terrified there might be something inside that could hear a pin drop, and going barefoot felt like my best shot at being stealthy.
As I entered the massive doorway, which had to be at least 20 meters by 12 meters
I finally saw the true scale of the tomb's first floor. There was no visible light source, yet the air was bright enough for me to see everything with terrifying clarity. What I saw were thousands of pillars supporting the roof (or the base of the pyramid, I guess). And embedded in every single one of them…
Was the very thing the advisor wanted. Each pillar was black, etched with silver, circuit-like lines and strange golden engravings I couldn't understand.
"Wh— how am I supposed to take one of these back?" I whispered. They weren't just sitting there; they were literally part of the pillars. "How am I going to remove them?! I'm f*cked."
Just as I started to panic, I spotted several machines roaming the floor. They looked like miniature tanks with octopean arms and three-fingered digits. I froze, not daring to move an inch, but the robot just rolled right past me, ignoring me as if I didn't even exist.
"…Does that mean I can move freely?" I wondered. No overthinking, Darcy. I'm taking that as a yes!
I began exploring, searching for a loose artifact or a spare one lying around for some reason, but I found nothing. After what felt like an hour, the forest of pillars finally ended. I found myself in front of a series of room-like compartments. They followed the same pattern as the pillars but lacked the gold engravings.
"What's in them…? Should I go in? How do I even open them? Is it safe?" The questions raced through my mind, but with every passing second, the risk grew. I needed to move fast. So I made a decision. I approached one of the doors and, the moment I got within two feet, it hissed open on its own.
"Well that makes it easy..I guess."
I marched inside. The same machines I'd seen earlier were lined up against the walls, but here they looked like they were resting. In the center of the room were various machinery parts,
nothing that looked like what I needed. I moved from room to room, searching for a spare artifact or anything remotely helpful.
After checking seven rooms filled with technology beyond my understanding, I finally found it: a room filled with artifacts!
I found it! I cheered internally. I hadn't made a single sound since entering the tomb, and I wasn't about to start now. I gently lifted one. It was heavy, it weighed about 10–12 kg and stood nearly as high as my knee.
"Shit, my bag is already heavy. How am I going to carry this all the way back to Carl and the gang?"
I moved the artifact just outside the room and set it down. Why? Because I still hadn't found anything useful for me. I wasn't leaving without some treasure to make this mission worthwhile.
I kept moving, room after room, until I reached the sixth door past the artifact room. I stopped dead.
Wait a minute… are those flintlock firearms?! In this world?!
There they were: muskets, rifles, carbines, and pistols, each displayed behind a glass case. Without wasting a second, I rushed in, broke the glass, and grabbed a pistol. But then it hit me.
Where was the ammo? Was it one-time use? I looked around for black powder, lead balls, or patches.
Before I could find anything, new robots appeared. These were different from the ones roaming the halls. Their main circuits were completely exposed…did this place run out of budget? And they had guns. Cool.
.
.
Wait. They have guns! Fuc—
The machines opened fire. In a total panic, instead of shooting back, I threw the pistol at them like a hand grenade.
Yeah. Genius. Once in a million years.
Surprisingly, they stopped moving. Their aim shifted toward the pistol on the ground. That's weird, I thought. Can they not see me? I pulled out one of the perfectly round rocks I always carry with me and tossed it. They immediately started blasting the rock into dust! How dare they! Do they know how hard it is to find a rock that round?!
I threw another rock; they blasted that too. Wait, are they only reacting to sound? I took a breath and screamed: "I used to bully your grandpa into making an essay on how bad an AI is having an impact o–"
Apparently, they got offended, because they started shooting immediately. I dodged, mostly because those tin boxes were incredibly slow at lifting their gun-arms into position.
I slowly approached the pistol.but the moment I moved it, they aimed at it again and opened fire. I dodged those aluminum fools again.
Wait, what if I…
I knew what to do, at least in theory. Time to put it into practice. I got close to the pistol, and instead of picking it up, I kicked it like a football right out of the room!
"Yeah! Try aiming now, you mothe—oh wait, you can't. you don't have the thing to be accused for it lol "
I ran after it and kicked it again. I kept the "game" going, dodging the roaming robots and kicking the pistol across the floor. The guardian robots were fast on their legs, like walking tanks and they stayed right on my heels, but for some reason, they couldn't or wouldn't pick the pistol up.
With one final kick, the pistol flew out of the main door, and I dove out right after it. The moment I stepped out, the door slammed shut and disappeared again.
"Finally! I'm out of that mess!" I yelled in victory, raising the pistol high into the air.
.
.
.
Wait. Am I missing something?
"OH F*CK! WHERE IS THE ARTIFACT?! DID I FORGET IT?! SHIT! OPEN! OPEN! PLEASE OPEN AGAIN!"