Lucian's own words shocked him. It was the first time he had threatened Celine with violence, and it was a terrible one at that.
Celine's body tensed in his arms, her hands clenching into fists.
The man, who said he would never raise a hand against her, was now capable of spewing the cruelest words at her without a flinch.
"You refused to give me the only thing I ask of you, so I have no other choice but to take it," Celine eventually replied, unfazed by his threat, "The moment we are married, you can be sure that I will make full use of my rights as your wife. Your little general will finally meet my little queen, and we will raise an army together. You can count on it."
"..."
Monotonous tone, blank face, and a bigger threat in return. Celine just doubled down on her desire to have more children with him. She didn't even blink.
"..." Lucian was used to her crude language, but sometimes it still managed to catch him off guard, "You are sick in the head," he mumbled, releasing her neck, and resuming his writing.
Celine didn't answer. Instead, she leaned back in, capturing his lips with hers, her arms wrapping around his neck.
This time, it was her who kissed him, and he who let her. His hand moved from her waist to her back, pulling her closer. His other hand cradled her cheek, tilting her head to deepen the kiss.
Why he couldn't pull back was a mystery to him, or maybe he didn't want to find the answer to it.
He was somehow fine with being her victim, as long as she never let go of him. Or was he the one who never wanted to let go of her?
He excused his actions as a way to keep her under control, but he knew that one didn't kiss someone like this if they didn't want them.
They eventually broke the spell, parting their lips, otherwise it would lead to more than just a kiss, and that would be harder to hide on a moment's notice.
Lucian tried to look unfazed, his hand reaching for the pen again.
Celine resumed reading the letters aloud, "I admire your knowledge and your passion for teaching, and I would love to learn more from you, outside of the classroom...my, she really wants to study under you, I see. In what subject, I wonder?"
"Probably anatomy," Lucian replied, making her laugh.
They were supposed to be on the same side, but they were acting more like enemies. The only thing that could make them stop fighting was a common enemy.
He waited for her laughter to die down, and then moved his face closer to her ear, "Should I put a stop to my admirers?"
"And miss the chance to have them pin after the pink head?" Celine crumbled the letter and moved to another, "Every few decades, a female fatale appears. Kingdoms weaken, men go to war over her, and the world is for the taking. It would be a waste not to take advantage of the opportunity, no?"
She was using the heroine as bait, to attract men's attention and lead them to their downfall. She was making a political move, to draw more eyes on the heroine, a commoner, and make everyone question the status quo.
The men would be so distracted by the heroine, that they wouldn't notice Celine's own machinations until it was too late.
Lucian was impressed, but also worried, "You're not worried about the competition? She might even steal your man."
"See? That's why you don't depend on love, or men for that matter. You'll always end up disappointed," she said, tossing a balled up letter in the bin, "Torture them, punish them, keep them on a leash, that's the only way they'll stay loyal."
"You're just describing a slave."
"I would rather be a slave master, than a slave of love."
Lucian leaned his chin on her shoulder, "What if I become a slave of love for you? What would you do?"
"You have already lost your mind, what's the difference?"
"..." Lucian wanted to bite her ear for that, but refrained himself, "Let's write a love letter to each other, to see who can write a more passionate one. If I win, you'll be my love slave, and if you win, I'll be yours."
"I will wipe the floor with your pathetic love confession," Celine grabbed a paper and a pen.
They decided to give themselves a month to write it, exchanging the letters on the last day of the Autumn season.
One page was the limit.
If there wasn't a wish standing in his way, these confession letters would have been a wonderful way to express their feelings to each other.
But now it felt like a competition, where the winner would get to control the other.
Lucian hugged her tighter, "Do you ever regret it?" he whispered.
"Regret what?"
"Your decision to not let me go."
She was quiet for a moment, then she sighed, "Every day."
Lucian smiled sadly, "So do I."
She didn't say anything else, and they stayed in each other's arms, finding comfort in their shared misery.
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Everything was going well until Lucian was summoned to the South to deal with the ferals, for periodical checkups.
It was a long journey to make, and the sooner he left, the sooner he could come back.
He made Celine promise him not to bully anyone until he came back, and she reluctantly agreed.
They said their goodbyes, exchanged their 'love' letters, and Lucian left the academy, heading south.
Inside the carriage, he carefully opened the letter he had been keeping in his pocket, the one Celine had written for him.
He didn't need to read it to know how heart wrenching it would be, her words always made him bleed.
'...I will force my way into your heart, and make it my home, even if you kick me out a thousand times... because my love for you is a madness that knows no cure.'
A blush crept onto his face as he read on, and he was glad that nobody could see him right now.
People would see a shy boy, blushing over a love letter, and not a grown man, who was supposed to be the leader of a powerful organization.
'She won't leave me alone, even in death. I'm so doomed.'
His expression didn't match the dread in his words.
There was a goofy smile on his face that could make the sun jealous of its brightness.