The hermit's life was arduous.
They had to find their own food; it wasn't hard to get enough to eat, but to eat well required careful management.
Fortunately, Yanxuan Valley was spring-like all year round, with abundant rainfall and fertile soil, so growing crops was not a concern.
Before the harvest, the father and daughter relied on hunting, gathering, and fishing for food.
Her foster father was a capable man; a single outing often yielded far more food and medicinal herbs than the two of them needed. Not only that, he was skilled at finding little trinkets that could enhance their lives, such as plants for seasonings, metals and stones for tools, or decorative flower branches.
Living in seclusion with him in the wilderness would never be difficult or dull; he was an old man full of surprises.
Day by day, Huan Xin watched pigskins and rabbit pelts hanging from the eaves. These were all her foster father's spoils and labor.
The animal furs, separated from flesh and bone, were stretched open by bamboo branches, emitting a strange odor, somewhere between decay and blood. The pelts looked quite disheveled, like disabled people struggling to walk with the aid of crutches—if everything had a spirit, these pelts would surely not be pleased with their state, being weathered by wind and rain, slowly drying out, shriveling yet forcibly stretched open, destined to become objects, constantly worn down, and collecting dust daily.
Huan Xin could almost viscerally feel that oppressive pain.
So she begged her foster father not to kill small animals.
Her foster father was an opportunist; he wouldn't let any potential gain slip by. The amount he hunted depended entirely on how many unlucky beasts he encountered, and he always disdained the idea of only taking what was needed.
"I'll hunt more to make cured and salted meat, which we can store for later… The furs can be sewn into satchels, or wrapped around furniture…" Her foster father just thought the little girl was naive; survival in a primitive life depended on careful accumulation of resources, so he lectured his adopted daughter endlessly on the principles of living.
"No, Xin'er just feels that even though they are wild beasts, they also have families, and losing any one of them would make them sad…"
Her foster father's expression was a bit unnatural; he forced a smile, "Then I'll go wipe out these beasts, nest and all. If they're all together, they won't be sad, right?"
Huan Xin didn't know whether to laugh or cry, "Foster Father, how can you be like this?"
"Enough, Xin'er, it's because I've spoiled you too much. As someone who practices martial arts, how can there be any reason not to kill? Your nature is kind and gentle; when you face your enemies in the future, I'm afraid you won't even have the courage to draw your sword!" Her foster father finally scowled. He realized there was a huge missing piece in Huan Xin's education: she needed to see blood!
"Later, I'll go to the forest and catch a few rabbits. You kill them all, skin them, chop them into pieces, and tonight I want to eat roasted rabbit meat."
For Huan Xin, this was like a bolt from the blue, "Foster Father, I was wrong! Please spare Xin'er this once! Just pretend Xin'er didn't say anything, okay?"
Her foster father grew even more disappointed, "Child, remember, you can be kind, but you cannot be hypocritical or weak.
"I told you to kill rabbits, and you're making excuses. Why? In truth, you don't actually like these animals; you just think you can't stand to see blood.
"You think if you don't see it, you'll remain pure forever, like those Bald Donkeys who talk about 'three pure meats'! Bah! How presumptuous! Hypocritical!
"As the saying goes, 'I did not kill Bo Ren, but Bo Ren died because of me.' Killing is killing! How can you think that if you don't get blood on your hands, it doesn't count as killing? Is it your sword that does the killing? Haha! What a ridiculous joke!
"You wait here! Don't move. I'm going to check the traps I set last night. Whatever I catch, you'll slaughter it all."
Her foster father's words were so harsh, so cold; even a frosty knife or snowy sword couldn't hurt more. After listening, Huan Xin felt her spirit completely drained, as if those words were a gale, tearing her humble, childish soul from its shell, leaving it to drift in the boundless, vast, and dim sky. She felt so cold.
Her foster father was indeed a man of his word; he said he'd return with rabbits, and sure enough, he came back with three rabbits: one large and two small.
"Kill!" Her foster father's words brooked no argument.
Alright, you tell me to kill, so I will kill. I will cast aside kindness, I will cast aside compassion, and let me become like those wicked people.
Huan Xin looked at the three wild rabbits huddled together, their fur grayish-yellow, dirty, and reeking. How ugly they were, but their eyes… The large rabbit squinted, trembling as it hugged the two small ones in its arms.
She looked at the rabbits on the ground.
Her mind suddenly recalled that dim temple.
Bright knives, swinging, men in armor, falling in pools of blood, the splashing red blood staining the idol so terrifyingly, as if this clay figure had devoured human souls.
That year, the Yellow River overflowed, destroying villages and homes, submerging fertile fields. Not only were the people on both banks affected, but there was even more famine across the land, with corpses littering the fields and starving people resorting to cannibalism.
Huan Xin was just a little girl then; she was abducted by a group of soldiers.
They called themselves soldiers, but the villagers, her beloved parents, had all been killed by them.
Anyone who could be taken was taken; children were taken as provisions.
Huan Xin was one of those provisions.
Just like the rabbits on the ground.
Foster Father, you are wrong. I have seen blood.
I just don't want to participate in slaughter.
Madness can destroy people.
And slaughter is the prelude to madness.
Huan Xin drew her fu yu sword and gently stabbed the three rabbits to death.
Why didn't you run?
That's right, just like me, you didn't not want to run, but you were simply too afraid.
On her foster father's ashen face, the anger faded, gradually replaced by a smile, "Good! Worthy of being my adopted daughter! I'll do the rest; you rest a bit and wait for dinner."
Huan Xin sheathed her sword.
A Divine Sword is a Divine Sword; it kills without being stained by blood.
The blood had all dripped into the soil.
She didn't return to the bamboo hut; instead, she ran into the forest to wander.
In summer, the cicadas' chirping forms the base of nature's melody; they are exceptionally loud but not unpleasant. If one gets used to them, then the cicada's song is almost everything of summer—with cicadas, it's midsummer; without them, it's spring, it's autumn, but it's not summer.
Huan Xin originally wanted to find a quiet place.
She couldn't find one; her ears were filled with cicada songs.
Gradually, she calmed down and no longer found it noisy.
She walked out of the woods.
A stream gurgled.
Along the stream was a small wooden house.
The wood was very new, not yet dried out, looking pale white.
Is that Fairy Sister's dwelling?
Huan Xin walked towards the wooden house curiously.
Her foster father said not to associate with that strange person, but she decided not to listen to him.
There was no door and no windows; looking in from the outside, it was pitch black.
"Is Fairy Sister there?"
The little girl called out.
A faint golden light rose in the house, like scattered fireflies.
"So beautiful!"
In the soft glow, a white robe vaguely appeared. Superior Reverends's face was kind and serene, with an epiphyllum pattern on his brow, gently shimmering.
-------------------------------
I've already uploaded over 30 chapters of this story on Patreon.
If you're enjoying it and want to read ahead, feel free to check them out here:
[patreon.com/Greyhounds]
Thanks a lot for your support, it really helps me keep going.