A few days had passed since their return from the Village of Waterfalls. Yamato-sensei had filed all the reports but wasn't in a hurry to take a new mission. Instead, he decided to focus entirely on team training. In plain terms, the kids were sent to practice outdoors on their own while the higher-ups mulled over the situation: for the second time in a row, a simple mission had turned into an A-rank survival game.
The lack of missions was anything but fun. The "Uzumaki Shop" was still registered as a source of income, which meant—taxes. And not in money, like normal people, but in the form of three A-rank scrolls.
As usual, Menma did the math: [Crafting scrolls eats up a lot of chakra, but not as much as fighting missing-nin. It's cheaper to stay home and pour chakra into self-improvement. But there's a catch. Only missions can bring artifacts or experience you can't buy with money. Parity.]
Today looked rather dull: Yamato-sensei announced he had urgent business and ordered the three genin to pick a mission inside Konoha on their own. In plain words: "go do something useful."
"Good afternoon, Sato-san," Menma greeted politely as he entered the familiar mission desk office. "Team Eleven has come for a D-rank assignment."
Sato-san, a plump kunoichi with a perpetually weary face, looked up at him and narrowed her eyes. "Really?" Her voice was both surprised and mocking. "Haven't seen you in this office for a month. I figured you'd outgrown the 'walk the dog and dig up potatoes' tier."
"I thought so too." Menma spread his hands with mock sorrow, theatrical melancholy in his eyes. "But our sensei apparently thinks otherwise."
Sato sighed heavily. Without another word, she placed a massive box on the desk, a big "D" painted on the side. Inside lay a mountain of scrolls.
"Ladies," Menma declared solemnly, turning to Naruko and Karin. "We're filtering out the cheapskates. Look for something quick, easy, and preferably chakra-free."
And so began the familiar process: the trio took turns grabbing scrolls, unrolling them, skimming the tasks, and rolling them back up immediately. Every job boiled down to the universal formula: "I want a lot, but I'll pay little."
"Oh, look!" Karin suddenly brightened, spreading one scroll open. "This one isn't from a private client. It's a mission from the Konoha administration."
Menma and Naruko instantly flanked her, leaning in so close that Karin had to hold the scroll with both hands to keep it steady.
"'Meet foreign guests at the village gates…'" Naruko read with interest.
"'…be polite and show them the village's landmarks…'" Menma added, lips twitching into a half-smile.
"But it doesn't list the names of the guests," Karin frowned. "Who exactly are we supposed to meet?"
"Give that here." Sato, watching them with the look of a mother about to break up a squabble over a toy, snatched the scroll and scanned it quickly. "Hmm. I see. This one's tied to the Chunin Exams. You can complete it anytime before the first stage starts. Simple enough: show this scroll to the gate guard, meet the first foreign participants that arrive, then give them a tour and some cultural guidance."
"They're already starting to arrive?" Menma raised a brow. "But the first stage is in two weeks."
"Some prefer to come early." Sato shrugged, then pulled her face back into its usual sour grimace. "Well? Are you taking the mission, or will you keep distracting me from work?"
Menma glanced at his teammates. Naruko was beaming with enthusiasm, Karin looked cautious but didn't object.
"Of course." He nodded, handing the scroll back for registration. "After all, you don't get chances for cultural exchange every day."
[And the mission doesn't have strict completion criteria. If the guests turn out to be complete idiots, I'll show them the Hokage Monument and say there's nothing else worth seeing in Konoha.]
With the mission scroll in hand, the Uzumaki trio left the office. The line waiting outside greeted them with the usual sidelong glares—clearly, they'd taken too long inside.
The moment they stepped outside, Naruko, brimming with energy, burst out with enthusiasm:
"The Chunin Exams are coming!" Her voice rang so loud that passersby turned their heads. "It's a chance to fight the best of the best our age! To show ourselves to the whole world! Brother, let's join!"
"That's not entirely up to us," Menma remarked calmly. "Yamato's the one who submits applications, if he decides we're ready. But I admit, the idea sounds tempting. We just need to… work on his conviction a little."
The twins exchanged glances and flashed matching predatory smiles.
"For participation you need three people," Karin said thoughtfully. She bit her lip, then gave a small nod as if deciding something. "I'll drag you two as far as the third stage, then I'll forfeit. I'm a lousy fighter anyway."
"Karin-chan, come on!" Naruko threw up her hands. "You're getting stronger every single day! Even Yamato-sensei sees it."
Karin brushed the words away like a pesky fly and looked straight at Menma. He stayed silent, only narrowing his eyes slightly.
[Karin right now is definitely stronger than Sakura was at this age in canon. But compared to her current version—I'm not sure. Kakashi without trauma trains his team way more effectively.]
"I think you should take part, Karin," Menma finally spoke. His tone was calm, but there was a spark of cold logic in his eyes. "Even if you don't get the chunin vest, the experience will stay with you."
Karin adjusted her glasses as if that would help her gather her thoughts. "You and your ironclad logic…" She sighed lightly. "But let's be serious: do you really think you're ready for the chunin title just a 3 month after graduation? That you can handle missions without Yamato-sensei watching your backs?"
"And why would we need him?" Menma shrugged, as if she'd asked, "Why does the sun shine?" "On every mission, we're the ones making decisions. Yamato just stands by and supervises. Honestly? Everything useful he could teach us—we've already squeezed out of him."
Karin frowned. "But he's a jonin. He has Wood Release. That's power."
"Agreed," Menma nodded. "One on one, he could take down almost any jonin in Konoha. But his power is his power. He can't share it. You, though—you can become a fighter on your own. A couple months with shadow clones, and that's it. Then you won't need jonin standing behind you."
Karin didn't look convinced, but she stopped arguing. At the very least, she quietly agreed to go with the twins through the first two stages of the exam.
They turned the corner and found themselves on an empty street. Their sensory abilities had already warned them that a familiar presence was approaching—and it wasn't a pleasant one.
Strutting out from around the bend came Konohamaru. The very same kid in the ridiculous scarf that dragged along the ground, collecting Konoha's trash. The instant he spotted Naruko, he lit up, puffed his cheeks, jabbed a finger at her, and yelled so loud cats leapt out of the trash bins:
"YOU LIED TO ME!!!"
The Uzumaki trio froze on the spot.
"What are you talking about, kid?" Naruko put on an angelic innocence, like someone wrongly accused of a crime they'd never commit. "I never lied to you."
"Lies!" Konohamaru shouted, stomping his foot. "You said you were in love with Akamaru!"
"And?" Naruko raised a brow, unfazed.
"I checked!" he blurted. "He's a puppy!"
"An adorable puppy," she corrected, even throwing in a wink. "Admit it—he's got the cutest ears."
Konohamaru faltered, scratching the back of his head. "Well… maybe they are cute… but I thought you two were dating…"
"A person and a dog?" Naruko widened her eyes and threw up her hands. "Eww! How could you even think that, you pervert?!"
Konohamaru turned beet red, looking like a complete fool. Menma and Karin, standing nearby, were barely holding back their laughter.
[Did he seriously try to lecture my sister? Naive. She once managed to make the academy principal blush.]
"So if you're single…" Konohamaru muttered, gulped down some air, then blurted it all in one breath: "Naruko-chan, will you go on a date with me?!"
"Can't," Naruko shot back instantly. "My brother doesn't like boys."
"What?" Konohamaru blinked and jabbed a finger at Menma. "What's he got to do with it?!"
"How do I put this…" Naruko pressed a finger to her lips, as if about to reveal a terrible secret. "My brother and I are twins. We share one life. One academy. One goal—to become Hokage. And… one girl."
And at that exact moment, Menma and Naruko leaned in together and planted quick kisses on the cheeks of the Karin caught between them.
Karin squeaked and lit up like her face had been swapped with a red lantern. Steam practically seemed to pour from her ears.
"W-what are you two doing?!" she gasped, whipping her head from one twin to the other in panic.
"You…" Konohamaru stammered, staggering back. "You're both… perverts! I—I'm not friends with you anymore!"
With eyes full of tears and snot clogging his voice, Konohamaru bolted, his scarf dragging through the dirt road behind him.
[Good riddance, snot-nosed terrorist.]
The twins smacked their palms together, satisfied with their prank.
"You two and your jokes…" Karin muttered, rubbing her cheeks with her palms as if trying to erase the kisses. "Now no one's ever going to marry me!"
"I'm afraid it's not a joke," Menma said seriously, fixing her with a steady look. "If the truth leaks out, Konohamaru will be back. With reinforcements."
"Karin-chan!" Naruko chimed, grabbing her hands. "Be our girlfriend! Just for a little while!"
Karin looked at them with such despair it seemed like they'd offered her a life sentence instead of a date. "Who am I even living with…" she muttered, slowly walking away. "Sometimes I think, compared to you two, Might Guy and Rock Lee are the voices of reason…"
And yet, despite her grumbling, she didn't outright refuse to play along.
///
Overwhelmed with emotions, Karin went home, leaving the twins to carry out the mission on their own.
At the village gates, they spotted three teenagers wearing forehead protectors with the Rain symbol. At first glance—ordinary genin, but their grim faces and identically raised collars made it clear: these guys weren't here for a cheerful tour.
"Welcome, honored guests of Konoha!" Menma announced brightly, throwing his arms wide in a theatrical gesture. "We, your humble guides, will gladly show you the most wonderful sights of our village."
"We came for the exam, not a sightseeing trip," one of them cut him off coldly—a sharp-eyed boy. "We don't need your games."
"Oh, but you do," Naruko pressed on, beaming like the sun itself had risen behind her. "There's so much to see in Konoha! We have a park, a market, the Hokage Rock. And—Ichiraku! You can only taste true ramen there!"
"We didn't come here to eat," the second boy, the one with long bangs, dismissed her with a wave. "We'll be training."
"Ahhh," Menma drawled, giving them a lazy sideways glance. "Well then, let's not get in your way."
The Rain genin exchanged irritated looks and quickly moved past them, ignoring both.
Menma shrugged, watching them go.
[Perfect. No chakra wasted, no time wasted, and the mission still counts. The ability to get a stamp in your scroll quickly—that's one of the highest shinobi talents.]
Naruko, however, snorted. "Shame, though. I was already set on making them pay for my ramen."
Late into the night, the twins plotted how exactly they would mess with Yamato's head to make him sign them up for the exam. But years of service had sharpened the jonin's danger sense.
So in the morning, he met them himself at the Shinigami shrine and, as casually as if he were stating the weather, said:
"I've registered you both for the Chunin Exams."
The twins looked at him like he'd just ruined the grandest con of the century.
"Something wrong?" Yamato asked carefully. "I thought you'd be happy."
"We had an awesome plan to force you," Naruko said with a pout. "And you ruined it."
With that, the door slammed shut right in Yamato's bewildered face.