Throughout the 2 months that Hayel didn't leave his house, his sight did return completely and that creature didn't show up again.
That, however, doesn't mean he is feeling better.
As days pass, Hayel's mental state worsens.
The little creature comes and goes almost every night, pulling his hair, taking things away and returning them every so often, putting out candles, breaking a few plates…
But it doesn't speak to Hayel like that one time. Or perhaps, Hayel just has to focus on his ability more to be able to communicate with it.
But he won't, he doesn't want to, neither does he feel brave enough to do it.
He did discover a few things about himself though, like the fact that he seriously doesn't have a heartbeat, the fact that he also stopped breathing even though in theory he can breathe, he just doesn't need to anymore and he also doesn't have to eat or drink, but he will lose weight if he doesn't.
He does have to sleep though, a lot less than a usual human however.
However, is he even human? He is not sure anymore. He bleeds like humans do, but doesn't do other things that are crucial for a human.
What will The Order do to him if they find out?
He doesn't even want to think about it.
Everything else is already too overwhelming to him, he feels scared every day. The only thing keeping him from ending it is the fact that he is even more terrified of actual death.
He thinks he did technically die however, no heartbeat and no need to breathe gives him that idea.
But is it a manifestation of his ability, or did he turn into a monster?
That's one of the things that's not sure to him.
Layla somtimes stops to check up on him, at first she was surprised that he didn't let her inside the house, later she became angry at him, then desperate.
He hasn't been going to work, so he was fired obviously.
Sometimes he has nightmares about the forest, about the window, about the girl….
That's why he stopped sleeping as much, and that's how he figured out he doesn't need to so often.
He ran out of food quite fast, after all he didn't have a lot to begin with. That's how he figured out he doesn't feel hungry as often.
Layla did bring him some food after she figured out that something is going on with him, he ate it so the food wouldn't get spoiled.
But he didn't eat a lot, Layla doesn't have that much money and he is not complaining, she should take care of herself first.
The jar with alcohol is now empty, and the house is not that clean anymore. He did get rid of the cloth he cleaned the table with though, it had Hannah's blood on it which made him remember what he did with her head.
The good news for him is that no one saw him that night, the bad news is there was another person that died the same way.
This time he didn't get the persons head thankfully.
He did leave the house once to take a walk in the beginning, but his anxiety was eating him alive, so he quickly went back to his house.
He also chose to relearn how to manually breathe like a normal person, however he does forget to do it quite often.
The fork also started talking. Not in a fun way, it mocks him, it makes him angry.
For example, it makes dumb jokes
"What did the fish say when it slammed into a wall? Dam."
"What's the difference between your arms and a daisy? They are both red, except the daisy."
He does have to admit though that it was a bit funny at first, but after hearing these jokes every day it just became annoying and wild.
Not to mention it often repeats the same jokes.
It also asks dumb questions.
"Would you still love me if I was a human?"
Or
"If someone told you that you couldn't put me in your mouth anymore, would you replace me?"
But he doesn't want to put it in the cabinet for some reason, so even though he is not happy about it, it still rests on his dining table next to the candle.
Because of the fork he noticed that he has been scratching his arms uncontrollably, perhaps it's from anxiety.
He is scared to go outside for multiple reasons, first the tall creature, second the fact that someone more perceptive might realize he doesn't breathe and things like that.
The fear ate him alive, he feels like he is not living, well perhaps he is not anymore, but either way, he feels like he is just existing. Nothing more.
He also cannot tell these things to Layla, he doesn't know how she will react. Sometimes he did come close to telling her, but he always stopped himself. He doesn't wish to tangle her in his problems.
What if she seriously thinks he has turned into a monster? That would only hurt him and her. What if she accepts it as it is? Someone might find out, and if she is questioned Hayel doubts they do not have the means to decipher lies. What then? She becomes his accomplice? The girls that's been hiding a monster?
It would be a cruel fate for her, so it's best if she doesn't know.
The nights still terrify him, the days only leave him when he is at his lowest.
What could he possibly do to make things easier for himself? He doesn't know.
Life has been a blur for him, the only thing that matters right now is the fact that he is still walking in this world.
He doesn't whish to lose everything he has, even if it's not much, that's why he is so scared of death.