"That is not how you go about to create a mana core."
Athusa pressed her face into her hands, feeling the dizzying drain of mana quicker than Eucemon's words. He looked worried as soon she seemed to steel herself, prepared to try again.
"Athy." His voice was gentle as he took her hand. "Why are you rushing?"
The calmly enveloping flow of mana from him was like the vast sea. It soothed the strain in her veins: her body protesting at its mistreatment. One week had passed but she was no closer to consolidating a core than when she started. This was vexing.
"You were weakened from exhaustion not that long ago," Chastised Eucemon. "Magic cannot be rushed. Stop pushing yourself so."
The backlash of the unstable attempt at a core was harsher this time but before pain struck she saw Eucemon's silver eyes faintly glow. He drew out the untamed energy, almost blankly observing its inconsistent flow and the unstable conversion. She watched, a little in awe, as he rolled the sphere of energy between his fingertips. She could not have imagined before his command over water could be used in such a way.
"..."
Her pride burned however as he said nothing. Compared to his mana and his control, his ability to play with magic as if it was a mere extension of himself, a second limb, her mana command by contrast was certainly...
"I know." Her hands clenched as she flushed scarlet. "I know my fundamentals are really poor."
It had been a long time, after all. She thinks to herself: how had she done it, in the past? She had not done this poorly before the Cardinal before.
"...I'm sorry for wasting your time." She added.
"Don't say that." Came his steady response. He had learned to wield his magic since his earliest childhood years. "You should not force progress in magic, it will only harm yourself. I simply had a lot of time to learn."
His expression softened at her dejected posture, and he patiently waited, until finally she said:
"But I have to honor my word to Astana."
How could she teach, when she herself was not doing her best to learn? The boy was right. It would be inconsistent of her: the meaning of teaching and the meaning of learning were inevitably entwined.
Hearing that, the expression on the prince's face was dark.
"He shouldn't have said such a thing." The tone was colder now. "Simply because he didn't want to take your language lessons seriously and sought an excuse. I will speak to him on this matter."
"I can keep going-"
"No." Eucemon's voice was wintry now. "That's enough for today."
...
Despite his harsh words, he brought her lunch from the kitchens. The soup was hot. She ate quickly, a little wondrous how deep the hunger burned from the expenditure of mana. She had seen the knights eat large amounts of food before but it was another thing to experience for herself.
Now that they were no longer disputing the specifics of learning approach, he seemed much more at ease, seemingly content to just watch her eat.
"...I don't know what I'm doing wrong." She admitted finally.
Athusa watched as he tapped a tapered finger on the table for a few long moments before finally responding.
"I am a little curious." He started. "Why do you think of yourself as a ... generator of mana?"
She looked puzzled at his inquiry.
"Isn't that how it should be?"
Mana must be drawn from the body's innate reserves, refined to be substituted into influencing natural reactions. A magus would essentially replace the requisites of physical and chemical reactions with their own mana to accelerate the natural laws.
"Athusa," Said Eucemon. "What's the source of our power?"
"The Ark." She answered immediately.
"That's right." He said evenly. "The Ark."
A long pause fell before she realized what he was trying to say. Eucemon, compared to his knights, never had unusual appetite and yet his power seemed bottomless.
"Mere fragments of the Ark," Continued Eucemon, "are able to draw out latent magical ability in people." It was a common practice in Ilecia, but especially more so in the Holy Empire, to draw out magic potential in such a way. Wealthy families would pay well to have access to relics comprised of fragments of the Arks.
It was less common a practice in the north, having been naturally blessed with so many magi. He could comprehend why she had not really experienced and understood such a concept before.
"Why would you believe you alone have to be the entire providing source?"
She thought to the reasonable explanation.
"But Euce, you..." He had a different constitution than her.
Didn't he?
"Athy." Came the serious reply. "If the Ark is the source of all magic, are we really that different?"
He may resonate better, attune deeper as a Star Seed, but weren't the principles essentially the same?
"The scholars of the institute have sufficient studies all magic is different forms of summoning." She recounted from the academic texts. "But you're saying that, because the Ark is integrated with the very land - that we're just accessing a source that is already there. Some simply resonate better, like you."
It was a fascinating consideration: that their magic could operate no different than the small scale devices the institute had created to store long distance communications.
"You're saying that-" She thought carefully. How could she even describe his magic theory? "You're saying that we are all just ... downloading, from the Ark."
The usage of incantations were not ritualistic but access keys in a way then.
He nodded.
"The institute wasn't fond of my theory." He looked amused. "As if they knew better."
He looked a little proud.
"Did you know that my Nightwings are as strong as the kingsguard?"
It was quite a boast: considering how the king liked to retain the most powerful magi.
"No," she said. "It makes sense." He had imposed his own training regime on his Wings.
"That night you protected me. How much of your magic was that?"
He didn't respond, looking away instead.
"...Euce?"
"That night," he finally said, "was merely but an instinct. Like moving a finger."
"Euce." She paused. "What is a Star Seed's overclocking like?"
His hands clenched then unclenched.
"Don't worry about what Astana said." He said finally. "It won't happen again."
She looked like she wanted to protest: if she did not know, how could it be countered? How was she to see the warning signs?
"I know right now I am not making much progress." She began. "However... Euce. That will change. I want to be of help to you."
As he had helped her.
"You're fine as you are." Came the peaceful answer. "I know my limits. What Astana said will not happen."
There was a long pause before he continued.
"Since my earliest memories, magic was a constant companion. Just practice when you can, Athy. When you want to."
The urging was gentle.
"It's all meaningless if you only know to fear magic."
Did you ever doubt? She wanted to ask.
"Yes." He seemed to have guessed at what she wanted to say. "There was a time... when I was very afraid too."
But not anymore.
That went unsaid as softly, his hands covered hers.
"But someone important believed in me."
She had a feeling he was talking about her father.
"...he said there will always come a time where we will understand our destiny."