Rumor had it that he studied at the Citadel, and before leaving out of boredom, he had already earned six links.
Rumor had it that he was a Sellsword in the Disputed Lands across the Narrow Sea, initially serving the Second Sons, and later forming his own Sellsword company.
Regarding Prince Oberyn's jousting, his wars, his duels, his mounts. What interested Tyrion most were the countless rumors about his sexual interests, such as both men and women... for example, Oberyn had bastard daughters called "Sand Snakes" all over Dorne, but not a single son.
Tyrion let out a small burp, which was also a small miracle.
After a pause, Prince Oberyn said frankly, "This is a small compensation from me, after all, I used you, Lord Tyrion."
"To be honest, my father might welcome any proposal from the Martell family, but my good sister..."
Tyrion scratched his hair and said with a headache, "She will definitely yell at me."
"Your sister... Cersei..."
Muttering to himself, Prince Oberyn suddenly said, "Lord Tyrion, we have actually met before, but I don't think you would remember."
He quipped, "You were even shorter then than you are now."
Tyrion, with his messy hair, said in surprise, "We've met? When?"
Prince Oberyn took a sip of wine and said, "Oh, a long time ago, when my mother ruled Dorne, and your father served as Lord Hand to another king."
He seemed to be recalling as he spoke: "When I, my mother, her man, my sister Ilia (Rhaegar's wife), and others visited Casterly Rock, I must have been fourteen or fifteen... Ilia was a year older than me. I remember your brother and sister were... eight or nine then, and you had just been born."
Tyrion's eyes trembled slightly; that was precisely the time his mother passed away during childbirth.
He raised his cup and gestured: "What do you think of Casterly Rock, Prince Oberyn?"
"To be honest, not very good."
Prince Oberyn pondered for a moment and said, "During our visit, your father kept avoiding us, only letting Ser Kevan handle the hospitality. The room he assigned me had a feather bed and a Myr carpet, but it was dark and windowless. I told Ilia it was more like a dungeon than a guest room. Also, the sky in the Westerlands was too gray, the wine too sweet, the women too plain, and the food too bland..."
Speaking, he looked at Tyrion: "And you, you disappointed us the most."
Tyrion ran his fingers through his hair, a hint of confusion in his expression, and said, "Disappointed? I remember you just told me I was just born then."
"You were the abomination everyone talked about."
Prince Oberyn shrugged and continued, "When you were born, we were in Oldtown, and everyone in the city was talking about the monster the Lord Hand had. Everyone thought it was a bad omen for the future of the Seven Kingdoms."
He curled his lips: "That's right, even when you were just a tiny ball of flesh, you were already known throughout the Seven Kingdoms."
The Little Devil also shrugged and said, "Yes, with my birth came famine, plague, and war."
He chuckled: "Oh, and winter, and the never-ending Long Night, these were all brought by me."
Prince Oberyn chuckled, saying, "Your birth indeed brought about your father's downfall. I once heard wandering monks in the countryside preach that your father made himself greater than King Aerys, but only the gods can be above kings, so they sent you as a curse to teach your father a lesson, because no mortal on earth can be equal to the gods in heaven."
Tyrion sighed deeply: "Actually, I tried very hard to fulfill the great trust of The Seven Gods, but I didn't succeed."
He grinned, raising his cup and gesturing: "Prince, please continue, I like listening to stories."
Prince Oberyn took a sip of wine and continued, "I was deeply disappointed because I found you looked too normal. Because, along the way, I heard that you had a hard, curly tail like a pig, an unusually large head, almost half the size of your body, and that you were born with thick black hair and a beard, one evil eye, and Lion claws. Your teeth were so long that you couldn't close your mouth, and between your legs, you had not only a man's * * but also a woman's * *."
Tyrion swallowed the wine in his mouth with difficulty, saying, "If I could * myself, I might save myself a lot of trouble."
He took another sip of wine: "Fangs and Lion claws might also come in handy... Prince, I already understand why you were disappointed."
Prince Oberyn shifted his body to lean back more comfortably and said, "At that time, the Lannister never brought you out, let alone showed you to guests. We only often heard an infant's wailing from deep within Casterly Rock at night. Ilia..."
He clenched the hand resting on his knee and continued, "If it weren't for your sister, we wouldn't have seen you at all. It was she who promised Ilia that she would satisfy our curiosity. The wet nurse who cared for you wanted to drive us away, but Cersei dismissed her in a few words. She said... a wet nurse is just a cow, she has no right to interfere with what she does. If she didn't move aside, she would tell Tywin to pull out the wet nurse's tongue. She said a cow only needs * *, not a tongue."
He paused, seemingly imitating Cersei's tone at that time: "...You are nothing but a cow, if you don't shut up, I will tell my father to pull out your tongue, anyway, a cow only needs * *, and doesn't need a tongue."
Tyrion grinned: "That seems to have left a deep impression on you. My sister has been charming since she was little."
Prince Oberyn scoffed, saying, "Cersei personally unwrapped your swaddling clothes for us to examine carefully. You indeed had one evil eye, black fuzz on your scalp, and your head was larger than most newborns. Unfortunately, you had no tail, no beard, no fangs, no Lion claws, and between your legs, only a tiny * *."
"After hearing so many bizarre rumors, it turned out that Lord Tywin's bane was merely a red, ugly infant with slightly deformed legs."
Tyrion's expression stiffened slightly, but Prince Oberyn smiled gently and added, "Although you were ugly, Ilia shrieked with excitement upon seeing you, as if seeing a cute kitten or puppy. She actually felt sorry for you and even wanted to raise you herself, heh."
Tyrion seemed to have heavy eyelids from drunkenness and yawned, saying, "Robert I deprived the poor Seven Kingdoms of their best queen."
As his words fell, Prince Oberyn's gaze on Tyrion suddenly sharpened, like a viper fixated on its prey.
Tyrion's heart sank, but he maintained a calm grin. At this moment... he suddenly remembered the Old Lion's warning: control your mischievous tongue (Chapter 334).
He raised his cup and said, "Perhaps one day, you will thank my Queen Regent sister, Prince Oberyn."
He would thank Cersei? Prince Oberyn sneered.
Tyrion's pointed words still succeeded in distracting Prince Oberyn's thoughts considerably, and his sharp gaze gradually dissipated.
Then, Tyrion patted his chest, and said with sincere tone, "Prince Oberyn, I must thank your sister. If I am not mistaken, since my birth, it was she who gave me the first love, that was the most precious gift."
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