The desert sun was merciless. It didn't shine, it attacked anyone unfortunate enough to find themselves under it.
Luffy trudged forward with his usual unshakable grin, though the rest of the crew looked half-dead.
The sand stretched endlessly around them, dunes rolling like golden waves under a sky that hadn't shown a single cloud in days.
"Water…" Usopp croaked dramatically, stumbling with his tongue out. "I can see the Reaper! He's waving!"
"That's a cactus," Nami muttered through gritted teeth, dragging her feet.
"I'm… gonna die…" Chopper whimpered, trudging alongside Vivi, who was doing her best to hide how pale she looked.
Luffy, of course, was unfazed. "We just gotta keep moving! Rainbase is straight ahead, right, Vivi? We'll knock their sandcastle over and save your country!"
Vivi managed a small smile. "Y-yes, but… Luffy, you can't just-"
"Don't worry!" Luffy laughed, stretching his arms like rubber bands. "I'm fired up!"
Sanji groaned, wiping sweat from his forehead. "You're also an idiot. You'll evaporate before we even see the next town if you keep yelling like that."
The crew's banter was the only thing keeping them moving until a strange, rhythmic sound echoed above them.
Whumf. Whumf. Whumf.
A shadow swept across the dunes. Everyone instinctively looked up, squinting into the sunlight. Something was flying overhead, no, someone.
"What the hell is that?" Usopp yelped, ducking behind Nami.
Vivi's face went pale. "…No. Is that...?"
Before anyone could react, a booming laugh exploded from the sky.
"BAHAHAHAHA! WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE?! A BUNCH OF LOST CLOWNS IN MY DESERT?!"
Then -CRASH!
A cloud of sand erupted as something red, blue, and gold slammed into the ground. When the dust cleared, there stood a familiar figure.
Tall, broad-shouldered, and shirtless save for his long red coat trimmed with gold. His blue hair was slicked back instead of hidden under his old hat, revealing a leaner, sharper face. His muscles gleamed under the sun like polished bronze.
It was unmistakable.
"B-Buggy?!" Nami gasped. Her reaction was quite complex, but Buggy didn't pay her much attention.
"A clown!?!" Usopp shouted.
"You..." Zoro muttered, already rubbing his jaw as if recalling old pain.
"CAPTAIN BUGGY THE CLOWN?! The Bloody Jester?!" Vivi stammered, stepping back instinctively. "He's got a one hundred and fifty million bounty! What's he doing here?!"
Luffy's grin widened instantly. "Oh, hey! It's the funny clown guy! Long time no see!"
Buggy turned toward him, his grin bright and dangerously charming. "Straw Hat… You're looking alive! I genuinely thought you'd have fallen into the ocean by now~!"
The two stared each other down for a long, comedic beat, their hair fluttering in the desert wind.
Then Luffy pointed. "You stole my meat that one time! Well, you stole just about everything in that town, but I still haven't forgiven you!"
Buggy laughed, throwing his arms wide. "Correction: I liberated the town of its material burdens! Besides, you got a good fight out of it, didn't you?"
"Yeah! And this time I'm gonna pay you back!"
Nami groaned. "Luffy, no-"
Too late.
Luffy launched himself forward, fist cocked back like a cannonball. "GOMU GOMU NO-"
Buggy didn't even move until the very last instant. Then his body split apart effortlessly, pieces floating out of Luffy's path.
The rubber man's punch slammed into empty air, kicking up a geyser of sand.
"PISTOL -HUH, again?!"
Luffy, after fighting Buggy, hadn't really met anyone that could dodge his attacks so effectively. It took some getting used to again.
But it wasn't like he had the time. Buggy's hand immediately extended, slingshotting at a speed that took Luffy by surprise. And before he could react, Buggy's punch caved his face in. Hard.
Bop!
Luffy spun backward through the air, landing face-first in the sand. It didn't do any damage, obviously.
"Bahahahaha! You're still as predictable as ever!" Buggy laughed, detaching his head and spinning it lazily around. "You call that an attack?!"
"Luffy! Don't underestimate him!" Vivi hissed to the others. "He's dangerous! Reports mentioned that he's completely unpredictable!"
Zoro sighed, drawing his swords. "Yeah, we know. He's also annoying."
He dashed forward, sand spraying beneath his boots.
Buggy's head snapped back onto his shoulders just as Zoro slashed horizontally. The blades whistled through thin air as Buggy's torso split apart, scattering sand in their wake.
Zoro blinked. "Ah, crap-"
Before he could finish, Buggy's detached leg swung around like a hammer and nailed him right in the groin.
THWACK!
Zoro dropped, eyes almost popping out of his skull as he fell on the sand.
"Same spot," Nami wheezed, biting back laughter. "He never misses!"
Buggy floated back together, grinning ear to ear. "Consistency is a mark of quality!"
Luffy bounded back up, sand in his teeth. "Pfew~ You've gotten stronger!"
"Of course I have!" Buggy spread his arms dramatically, chest puffed. "Do you think the Great Buggy wastes his time doing nothing? While you were goofing off, chasing new crewmates and meat, I was training! Perfecting! Getting some gainz!"
He didn't draw a single knife. Didn't need to.
He slipped past Luffy's next punch like it was slow motion, slapped his cheek, twisted his arm, and spun him around by the legs until the Straw Hat captain became a human propeller.
"WHEEEEEEE!" Luffy shouted, half-laughing, half-dizzy, as Buggy flung him upward like a rubber balloon.
Luffy flipped through the air as he continued to laugh; he was sent up at least a hundred meters into the sky.
Luffy crashed down, bouncing across the sand, and lay there grinning up at the sky. "Man, that was fun."
Buggy landed beside him, crossing his arms. "You call that fun? Kid, you're insane. I got dizzy just spinning ya~"
Zoro groaned, staggering upright and clutching his swords with one hand and his pride with the other. "You… still fight like a clown."
"Wow, very observant. Are you going to let me know I have a red nose next? Also, I'm still better than a drunkard swordsman who leads with his groin," Buggy shot back.
"Why you-" Zoro charged again, but this time Buggy's body split mid-stride. His hands clamped onto Zoro's wrists from behind, forcing him to drop his blades. Another piece of Buggy's body nudged Zoro's knee, sending him stumbling face-first into the sand.
"Nighty night, mosshead," Buggy said cheerfully.
Sanji let out a low whistle. This was the first time he had seen Zoro lose his grip on his blades, but it seemed that Buggy knew just where to strike.
It wasn't like Buggy was overwhelmingly stronger or anything. No, Sanji could tell, Buggy was at most equivalent, if not slightly weaker, physically than Zoro and Luffy.
In a way, it reminded him of Old Geezer. Age allowed one to gather experience, and Buggy didn't look like he had wasted much time.
"Shouldn't we… help?" Usopp whispered.
"Against him?" Nami hissed. "No thanks. Let the idiots bond."
Chopper blinked. "But he's hurting them!"
"He's not hurting them," Nami sighed. "He's just… humiliating them."
"Same thing," Usopp said weakly.
"Well, I am not getting involved since I have to keep Nami-chwan and Vivi-chwan safe~" Of course, Sanji had his own priorities.
Buggy dusted off his hands while looking down at Luffy, who was still spitting out sand.
The straw-hat pirate popped back to his feet again, his grin never fading. "You're way tougher than last time!" He said, bouncing on his heels. "You're not just a clown anymore!"
"Excuse you," Buggy replied with mock offense. "I'm theclown. The clown with a bounty higher than your combined crew's allowance."
Vivi stiffened but stayed quiet. Her eyes darted between them, calculating, nervous.
A 150 million berry monster casually chatting with her friends in the middle of the desert was not how she envisioned her day going.
Still, there was something strange about him. He wasn't attacking seriously. There was no murderous intent, no killing aura. Just… playfulness. Like a tiger stretching its claws instead of striking.
Luffy rubbed his arm, grinning. "You're even stronger now, but how come you're alone? Where's your crew? Wanna join mine?!"
Buggy smirked. "Bah, afraid I can't be anything but the main act, such is my nature~ Let's just say I've been putting my boys through a few… circus drills," he flexed slightly, the gold trim on his coat glinting. "Can't run an empire without a strong core team, after all."
"You look different without the hat," Nami said cautiously.
Buggy turned to her, mock-dramatic. "Tragic loss at sea. A wave the size of a mountain stole it from me. But that's alright," he swept a hand through his slicked-back hair, "I make baldness look beautiful."
Nami blinked. "…You're not bald."
"I know," he said smugly, already used to speaking nonsense. Being an unmedicated schizo had its perks.
Luffy suddenly jumped again, unable to resist. "Gomu Gomu No~"
Buggy held up a hand lazily. His forearm detached, grabbed Luffy's stretched punch midair, and twisted it in a knot before gently letting go.
Luffy stumbled back, stunned. "Whoa!"
Buggy chuckled, reassembling himself. "Being flexible's great, but you've got no control, kid. Learn to direct that energy quicker, or you'll spend your whole life flying into walls."
"Hey! I like walls!"
"Clearly, hit a few during your childhood?"
The two stood there for a moment, a strange camaraderie forming amid the sand and heat.
Finally, Buggy tilted his head. "Tell me, Straw Hat. You're not just sightseeing out here, are you? You wouldn't drag this many idiots through the desert for fun."
Luffy blinked. "We're going to the Baroque whatever place! Some bastard called Zero or whatever is causing trouble in Vivi's kingdom!"
Buggy's grin widened slowly. "Mr. Zero? Oh, yeah. You aren't yet aware. Anyhow, Mr. 0 is Crocodile. Big whoop."
"We already knew that it was Crocodile, I've done my best to uncover as much infromation as I could... But how does an outsider like you know?" Vivi on the sidelines could barely believe her ears, but the worry in her eyes increased tenfold.
Buggy chuckled at her concern, turning his gaze toward the horizon, where the faint mirage of Rainbase shimmered in the heat.
"Ah, don't worry your fuzzy head, things like those tend to get out. Ain't like he's the king of the moon, he's just a glorified Vice Admiral for the Navy... with a few plans to take over a kingdom. But at this point which Warlord hasn't tried to take over a kingdom?~"
Luffy frowned. "You're after that 0 or Crocodile guy too?"
Buggy brushed sand off his coat, his tone light but his eyes sharp.
"Have some business with some of his associates, don't really care much about him unless he plans on becoming my subordinate or somethin~ But if I lose one too many games of blackjack in that casino, then I may just get mad enough to blow it sky-high."
The Straw Hats stared at him, unsure whether to laugh or be confused.
Then Buggy started to float again, pieces of him drifting upward on unseen air currents. "Well then! Looks like our paths may cross again, Straw Hat! Try not to die before the finale!"
Luffy grinned up at him. "You too, clown guy!"
Buggy laughed, loud and booming. "It's Captain Buggy to you!"
And with that, his body shot upward, scattering into pieces that vanished into the blue haze above.
The crew stood in stunned silence for a moment.
Usopp broke it first. "…So we're just pretending that didn't happen?"
Nami groaned. "At this point, I've stopped questioning the universe."
Vivi exhaled shakily, clutching her scarf. "That man… he's terrifying. But what he was saying is even scarier... Baroque Works is a highly secretive organization, to think..."
Luffy smiled, staring toward the horizon where Buggy had gone. "Nah. He's just funny."
The desert wind carried his laughter across the dunes, light, fearless, unstoppable.