Yang Lulu enters the room silently, lost in her own thoughts.
"What happened, Yang Lulu?" I asked her while doing my final touch-up.
"Nothing. Tell me, are you done with the makeup?" she asked softly.
"Yes, just one second and it's done," I said.
Then we both went outside the room and sat on the chairs, waiting for Director Li to call us for the scene. Xu Yuan also came out of his room, looking at the script in his hands, but he looked quite different—like he had just come back from fighting a huge battle. Maybe I was thinking too much.
I started reading my lines from the script very seriously.
"Zhao Shiza, do you want some lemon water?" Yang Lulu asked softly near my ear.
"No, I don't. But tell me, why are you asking me like this?" I smiled. "You are just asking me for lemon water. There's nothing illegal in this."
She smiled and said, "Yes, but some things are meant to remain secret."
"Yes, true. I agree with you," I said.
"You know what, Yang Lulu? Just relax. I don't know how, but I behaved like a professional drunkard. I didn't vomit, I didn't even have a headache. Even though I drank for the first time in my life, I had such a high tolerance. Wow, Zhao Shiza, you are so good. I am proud of you," I said to myself very proudly while patting my own head.
"You know what, Zhao Shiza? You are something else," Yang Lulu said. "I don't know how, but you always find a reason to smile in every situation."
"You know what, Yang Lulu? It's not something special in me that I find happiness in every circumstance. It's just that at a very early age, I learned that I might not be able to get everything I want, but I can cherish all the things I already have in my hands. At least I should be thankful for that, because what I have might be someone else's dream. Humans are never satisfied—our demands and wishes keep increasing. If today we get what we want, tomorrow we want something else, and the day after tomorrow something more. This cycle continues. It never stops."
"How deep," Yang Lulu said, awestruck.
I lightly hit her hand and said, "Stop exaggerating. I didn't say anything you haven't heard before. We all know these facts—it's just human nature."
Then Director Li's voice came. "Okay, we are ready for the shoot."
We both went in front of the camera. In today's scene, we just needed to dance together while holding emotional expressions. We started dancing a slow couple dance on soothing music. His one hand was on my shoulder, the other holding my hand. Mine was the same.
We danced together. His eyes filled with tears—of course, it was the scene's demand—but why did I feel like he was holding back real tears? Maybe I was thinking too much. I was here to work, not to observe him from head to toe. I wasn't going to write an exam on him. But if I ever did, I would definitely top Shanghai University—that much I knew.
"Okay, cut. Perfect. The scene will continue after a 15-minute break," Director Li said.
I went back to my makeup room with Yang Lulu to change my costume for the next scene. Xu Yuan also went to his room and locked the door from inside.
He held his hair with both hands and said to himself, "I don't know why this feeling keeps coming back. I want to hold her, protect her from everyone. We're not even friends. She doesn't seem comfortable talking to me. But if that's the case, then why was she talking about me the whole time when she was drunk yesterday? I need answers, otherwise this feeling will kill me from inside. But I know she will never give me answers. She knows very well how to hide things. So I shouldn't waste my time on something useless."
He sat on the couch, then took out his phone and dialed a number.
"I want to meet you now," he said.
He informed his team that he would be back within half an hour and left the shooting set. He reached a café near the set where we usually took takeaways. He sat at a table for two and waited.
The person arrived and sat in front of him.
"Why did you call me in such a hurry?" she said. "I missed my class today because of you—no, because of Zhao Shiza. You said you wanted to talk about her."
Xu Yuan exhaled sharply. "Miss Wang Ruoxi, I want to ask you something sincerely. Please answer me truthfully."
Wang Ruoxi hesitated. "What are you going to ask? You're scaring me."
"It's about your childhood best friend, Zhao Shiza."
"What do you want to know? She's shooting with you every day. Why don't you ask her yourself?" Wang Ruoxi said.
"I can't. You know she's very tight-mouthed. Even when she was drunk, she didn't say everything."
"Indeed," Wang Ruoxi said. "Okay, what do you want to know?"
"I… I don't know how to put this," he said hesitantly.
"It's okay. Relax. Take your time," Wang Ruoxi said gently.
"Tell me, Wang Ruoxi—why does she avoid me? Why doesn't she talk to me? Why is she uncomfortable with me? Do I look like a monster?" He asked, holding back tears.
Wang Ruoxi paused. "Xu Yuan, you said she talked about you when she was drunk. What exactly did she say?"
"She was completely different—talking about me, caring about me, knowing every detail about me. But I still couldn't figure anything out."
"Xu Yuan, if a third person heard her words, what would they assume?"
"It would seem like… she is obsessed with that person… or in love," he stopped mid-sentence.
"You already have your answer," Wang Ruoxi said. "You didn't even need me."
She stood up. "The answer is always inside you."
"Wait," Xu Yuan asked. "Does she really love me?"
Wang Ruoxi turned around with a faint smile. "No. She doesn't love you. Love is too small a word. Have you seen someone worship an idol?"
Xu Yuan nodded.
"She doesn't love you. She worships you. She has worshipped you since the day she fell for you. Look at her eyes—that's how someone looks at their idol."
She left.
Xu Yuan sat there, lost in her words.
"Did I really deserve that?" he asked himself.