"If there's something wrong with your health, you should have told us beforehand. If anything happens to you, both Arthur and I will do everything we can to help," Artoria insisted, her voice filled with concern.
Beside her, Arthur nodded silently.
After a brief moment of silence, Irisviel let out a soft sigh.
When she looked back at the two of them, something in her expression had changed.
"Artie, you're right," she said with a small smile that didn't reach her eyes. "There's no point in hiding this from you. It might even cause trouble for you and Arthur later."
She hesitated for a moment.
Then she slowly extended her hand toward Artoria.
"Hold out your hand."
Iri stepped closer, and Artoria, without further questioning, obeyed, extending her right hand.
"Artie… can I squeeze your hand with all my strength?" Iri asked.
"Mm, of course," Artoria replied, still confused, but accepting.
In the next instant, Iri grabbed her hand and squeezed—or at least tried to.
Her fingers trembled visibly as the skin of her hand tensed.
Her brow furrowed with genuine effort.
Her entire body seemed to strain for that simple action.
But—
"Irisviel?"
Artoria's confusion deepened; she felt nothing more than a light touch.
"I'm not joking, Artie…" Iri forced a smile, though her breathing had become slightly uneven. "For me… right now… this is already my limit."
"I can barely squeeze your hand… I can't properly hold objects. Simple things… like changing clothes in the morning… already require an absurd amount of effort."
The silence that followed was heavy.
Arthur moved immediately. Without asking permission, he took Iri's hand.
His eyes narrowed.
His perception sank directly into her soul.
What the hell… The thought surfaced, dry and laced with irritation.
The souls of the fallen Servants—or rather, almost all of them—were pushing the structure of her soul to the brink of collapse.
This wasn't something that could be treated casually.
Not even with brute force.
It required time.
A lot of time.
And he knew that was exactly the one thing she didn't have.
He had already expected it would come to this point.
It was an inevitable outcome.
That was why, during the nights they spent together, he constantly used his abilities to alleviate her soul's condition as much as possible.
His supreme ability—Anubis—was capable of absurd feats.
But even so, it still wasn't enough.
Iri's condition was worse than he had anticipated.
And that was precisely why he continued to participate in the Holy Grail War.
He knew that if the body and brain were destroyed, the soul would disperse.
And a dispersed soul could not be restored—not even by the Holy Grail.
Transferring the soul into another body?
That was only an imperfect, unstable solution doomed to decay.
Just like what happened with Zouken Matou.
The soul would rot, and the body would follow the same fate.
It was a fundamental rule of this world.
Something absolute—even for him.
But there was one exception.
The Third Magic—Heaven's Feel.
A magic that allows the materialization of the soul, preventing its inevitable dispersal when it loses its anchor in the world, essentially elevating it into a higher state of existence. It is a magic that achieves true immortality, transforming the soul into a high-dimensional entity capable of interacting with the material world like a mental body, without needing to return to Akasha.
Heaven's Feel would be the ultimate upgrade for his ability. Moreover, it would solve another problem—some of his wives were human or had limited lifespans, unlike him, who would live almost forever.
"Thank you, Arthur… I feel much better." Iri smiled softly.
But it was obvious—her body didn't match that smile.
Her brows were still slightly furrowed.
And her weakness couldn't be hidden.
At that moment, she was like a cracked cup.
No matter how much you tried to fill it, everything would keep leaking out.
And faster each time.
"Tell me, what happened? Did you get hurt somewhere?" Artoria asked, stepping forward.
"I'm just feeling a little unwell," Iri replied casually.
"So I deliberately blocked my sense of touch. It helps suppress the problem… prevents it from interfering with my actions."
She tilted her head slightly.
"This kind of adaptability… could be considered an advantage of being a homunculus…"
"That's not something you can just ignore!" Artoria shot back immediately. "And what exactly do you mean by 'a little unwell'? You should seek medical attention!"
"Perhaps you've forgotten, Artie…" Iri replied with a faint smile. "I'm not an ordinary human."
She took a small step.
"This 'discomfort' is, in the end, a structural flaw of mine. It's fine… see, I can still move freely right now. I'm just… a little weaker—Ah?"
She raised her arms as if to prove she was fine, but her body failed her, and she lost her balance.
"Iri!"
Artoria rushed forward, but Arthur was faster.
He caught her by the waist in the same instant, stopping her fall before it truly began.
"Thank you, Arthur." Iri smiled at him.
"To avoid causing trouble for the two of you… I'll stay in this mansion from now on, until the end of the Holy Grail War, until—"
"Why?"
Artoria's voice cut through her words.
"Why do you keep pretending to be strong… when you're on the verge of collapse?"
"Huh? I'm not—" Iri tried to smile again.
But this time, her words didn't convince anyone.
"Irisviel von Einzbern."
Artoria's tone changed completely.
"You should trust me… and Arthur more."
She pressed lightly against her own temple, as if restraining her emotions.
"Pain, sadness, weakness… you should tell us. Even if it's something small."
Her eyes locked onto Iri's.
"Aren't we partners? Or are you not afraid of dying? And what about Illya? Have you already given up on returning to her?" Artoria said, her voice clearly tinged with anger.
Irisviel was momentarily speechless.
She bit her lower lip hard enough to nearly draw blood, as if trying to hold back something that had already surpassed its limit.
"I… I…" The words wouldn't come.
For a long moment, silence dragged on—heavy, suffocating—until finally—
"Of course I'm afraid of dying!" The shout tore through the air, carrying everything she had been suppressing until now.
The emotions she had hidden behind gentle smiles and lighthearted words collapsed all at once.
Her shoulders trembled as her voice faltered.
And then the tears came.
"It hurts so much!" she continued, her voice breaking with every word. "Ever since the first Servant died… it's like… like something inside me is being torn apart… ripped from the inside out!"
Her fingers clenched against her chest, as if trying to contain the invisible pain consuming her.
"And it just keeps getting worse… it hurts more and more! There are moments when… when I can barely speak… when even breathing feels wrong!"
Her breathing grew uneven.
"Even… even knowing this from the start… even preparing myself…"
She lowered her head, tears falling endlessly, soaking the ground beneath her.
"I don't want to die…" Her voice came out softer this time.
"I really don't want to die!" She lifted her face again, her tear-filled eyes shining with genuine desperation.
"I want to stay here! I want to keep living in this world! I want… I want to live a little longer!" Her voice broke again.
But she stubbornly continued.
Clinging to those words as if they were the last thing she had left.
"I want to experience more moments with you… happy moments… simple moments… I want to show Illya the beauty of this world… I want her to see all of it… not the way I did… not as something fleeting… but as something she can truly live…"
Her knees trembled slightly.
"I want… I want to be with you… forever…"
The words came out almost as a whisper.
Carrying an impossible wish.
"I don't want Illya to end up like me…"
Her fingers tightened further.
The fear surfaced again.
"I know the same future awaits her, and I don't want her to feel this pain… I don't want her to go through this…"
Her voice dissolved into open sobbing.
"She's just a child… she doesn't deserve this… she doesn't deserve it…!" Her words were lost between her cries.
The strength that had sustained her façade finally vanished completely.
What remained was a terrified woman.
Desperate to live.
And even more desperate to protect the one she loved.
(End of Chapter)