"Um, Luciana... I think I've fallen in love with someone."
I'm certain those were the words that started it all. I can still see my best friend's face—flushed red, a shy, bashful smile playing on her lips. But because she looked so anxious while telling me, I made sure to act as happy as if it were my own romance, just to give her courage. Inwardly, I was already deciding that if the guy was some lowlife, I'd force them to break up immediately. Still, seeing my childhood friend talk so happily made me want to support her with everything I had.
I became a Queen specifically to support her. If her new boyfriend was about to get pummeled by her sister-obsessed brother, Diehauser, well... I figured I'd look after him. Her happiness was my own.
"Wait, Cleria! That man is with the Church! This is impossible! It'll never be allowed!"
Then, the memories of rejection surfaced. When Cleria finally introduced him to me, I nearly stopped breathing. I recognized him instantly: Masaomi Yaegaki, a warrior of the Church who had come to discuss territorial disputes with Cleria in her role as the administrator of Kuoh Town.
Back then, I forcibly sent him away and spent hours lecturing Cleria. The entire peerage tried to stop her, telling her how insane and dangerous this path was. But Cleria just sobbed, begging us to "look at him as a person, not a member of the Church." Seeing her like that made it impossible for us to keep pushing. We didn't want to be the reason for her tears.
So, I decided to take her at her word. I would observe him and judge for myself, fully intending to tell her he wasn't good enough. I began to watch Cleria and Masaomi's relationship. At first, the other servants were prickly, and I was biting in my criticism of him.
"What exactly do you think you're doing?" I'd ask.
"Oh, Luciana. Um, I wanted to get Cleria a present, but I'm not sure what she'd like..."
"Are you telling me you don't even know what women like?"
"...Would she be happy with a whetstone?"
"Why on earth would you think that!?"
The more I watched him, the more I wanted to say "no" when asked if he was a fit for her. He was even more oblivious to the world than Cleria, a noble Devil. Having lived only as a soldier for the Church, his common sense was completely warped. Whether he was a natural airhead or just that earnest, I couldn't tell, but he was honest to a fault and clumsy at everything he tried. I lost count of how many times I sighed at his failures.
And yet, Cleria would watch those failures with a gentle gaze and join in whatever he was doing. They looked so happy, so warm when they laughed together. Before I knew it, the rest of the servants—who had been so negative—were laughing right along with them.
When did I join that circle? Love hadn't changed Cleria; she was still the same person, and it felt natural to be by her side. Masaomi was always working himself into a frenzy for her sake, usually with zero results. And I would be right there to give her a "Queen's Chop" and steer her in the right direction when she started acting as foolish as he was. It became our "normal."
"Ugh! Luciana, you're being so mean to your King!"
"That's because you aren't acting like a King."
"Now, now, you don't have to be so strict..."
"That goes for you too!"
"Gack!?"
I lost. I realized I had surrendered to how comfortable that space felt. Watching him fail, watching her laugh, and all of us smiling at the two of them... those days were precious. It was absurd and hopeless, yet I found it sacred.
So, I made a choice. No matter the obstacles, no matter who denied them, we would protect them. I wouldn't let anyone destroy this gentle, ridiculous world we had built. My head knew how difficult it would be, but my heart didn't care for logic. It was my own silent vow.
As the Queen of the Belial peerage, as her childhood friend, and as her sister in all but blood, I would ensure Cleria's love bore fruit. Her happiness was everything.
***
"Everyone, stay close to me."
Masaomi didn't hide his grim expression, but he didn't waver. He stood before the despair of the surrounding forces and leveled his sword. Just as the Exorcists suspected, he couldn't abandon his comrades. He would fight to the end to protect them, no matter how reckless it was.
Luciana stared at his back, her mind racing. Is this really how it ends? she wondered. Masaomi was going to try and fight both Devils and Exorcists while protecting her and the other wounded servants. The outcome was obvious. Her cold, rational mind reached the only logical conclusion.
She stepped forward, placing herself between Masaomi and the Devils.
"Masaomi... please, run."
Her voice was clear and filled with resolve. Luciana was surprised by how calm she sounded. But she knew this was the only way. Since the day she decided to support Cleria's love, she had been building this resolve piece by piece.
She wanted to cry. She wanted to hold her trembling body. But she had made a vow. It was selfish, perhaps, but this was the most important thing in the world to Cleria. Even if the entire world became her enemy, Luciana would keep wishing for their happiness. She was stubborn, and she knew it. She would stand tall for the things she refused to compromise on. Even at the cost of her life.
"What are you saying!? If you do that...!"
"If we stay here as a group, we all die," Luciana cut him off. "You have a duty to save Cleria and make her happy."
"I can't do that alone! If you aren't there—"
"Don't be soft. You're the man I allowed to stand beside Cleria. Now pull yourself together."
She gave him a small smile. Even now, he was being an idealist. She had wanted to watch the two of them for much longer. She wanted to laugh with everyone again. And maybe one day, she would have found someone who could love a stubborn woman like her.
Seeing these two idiots makes me so frustrated as a woman. I was planning to find a good man of my own one day...
"Everyone, this is my final order as your Queen," Luciana commanded. "Target the Exorcists. I will stop that Devil. We will clear a path for him with everything we have."
"…!"
"Once he breaks through, escape. Use your own judgment. I'll do my best to buy you time. Please... stay alive. I'm sorry for being such a pathetic Queen."
Fighting back tears, Luciana forced a brave smile. The other servants looked back at her with crumpled, tear-streaked faces, but they nodded. They stood up, channeling their magic and gripping their weapons, ready to fulfill their roles.
Masaomi looked at their faces and realized the truth. Not one of them intended to run. They were going to burn their lives away to make a path for him.
"Stop it! This is—"
"Masaomi, promise me."
Luciana turned back to him and gave him a beautiful, serene smile. On behalf of the entire Belial peerage, she entrusted their feelings to him.
"Make Cleria happy. No matter what."
"————"
Masaomi reached out, but his hand didn't reach her. He only grasped at the empty air.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!"
A roar went up—whether from Masaomi or the servants, no one knew—and they charged. Magic and weapons clashed in a desperate struggle.
They knew they couldn't win. But they could do something. Even if their power was small and fleeting, they could leave behind a spark of hope.
"Hah!"
Luciana fired a bolt of magical flame straight at the Bael Devil. He frowned and flicked his hand, manifesting a magic circle that released a superior black flame to swallow hers.
The black fire surged toward her, but Luciana had anticipated the move. She dodged by a hair's breadth and lunged toward him.
"Fruitless," the Devil sneered.
As she prepared another strike, he pointed a finger at the ground. The earth suddenly surged upward, a heavy mass of soil slamming into Luciana's solar plexus.
"Gack...!"
The impact lifted her small frame off the ground. Blood pooled in her throat. She tried to steady herself, but as she reached for the ground, she felt a sudden, crushing weight.
"Got you."
"…Ah…!"
A massive hand clamped onto the back of her head. The Devil mocked her struggle, intending to show her how meaningless her life was. He channeled magic into his grip, the pressure mounting.
The sound of grinding bone filled the air. As he prepared to crush her skull like a piece of fruit—
"…!?"
A sword-strike, swift as a gale, forced him to release her. The Devil's eyes widened as he jerked his hand back. Had he been a second slower, his arm would have been severed. He broke into a cold sweat, looking up to see the one who had struck him. He sneered as he realized who it was.
Masaomi stood there, holding the bleeding Luciana in one arm, his killing intent focused entirely on the Devil. He leveled his blade, his presence making it clear that a single step forward would mean death.
"Masaomi... why...? You have to... go...!"
"Hahaha! You really are a fool, aren't you!?" the Devil laughed. "These pieces of trash bought you time, and you threw it away! You just snuffed out the hope they died for!"
Masaomi didn't react to the mockery. He looked down at Luciana, his face flickering with grief for a moment before hardening into the mask of a warrior. He wrapped his coat around her and gently set her on the ground. Then, he stood to face the Devil.
"Please, Masaomi! Just run... it's not too late...!"
"Heh! Go ahead, run! I'll make sure there isn't a single scrap of meat left of this woman by the time you're gone!"
Confident in his victory, the Devil continued to goad him. He expected to see a face twisted in despair and regret. But Masaomi remained calm.
"…Luciana, settle down. It's okay now."
"What?"
Masaomi spoke with a gentle, steady tone, seemingly indifferent to the Devil's threats. He looked almost embarrassed, as if he weren't quite sure how to explain the situation.
"I'm sorry I'm late. I'm always almost losing the things that matter most. Cleria, Shidou, you... I can't afford to lose a single one of you."
"Masaomi...?"
"You talk big. There is no hope for you in this situation—"
"There is. Right here."
Masaomi pulled a black device, like a comms earpiece, from his pocket. Neither Luciana nor the Devil recognized it.
"Luciana, you always say I'm a bit slow. I've been meaning to give this back to that boy, but I kept it in my pocket and completely forgot until just now."
Luciana's eyes widened. She realized what it was—a magical communication device. And she knew who he meant by "that boy."
The day Masaomi and Kanata had gone shopping in Kuoh for Cleria's present, Kanata had lent it to him, saying he was "good at providing backup from the rear." That borrowed item had become their lifeline.
"A massive gift of 'hope' just reached my ears. He told me it's going to be okay."
A bolt of purple lightning tore through the sky. Thunder roared as the lightning struck the park, precisely targeting the Exorcists and knocking them away from the wounded servants.
The Exorcists scrambled to regroup, stunned by the sudden ambush. The Devil stood frozen, glaring at Masaomi.
"Impossible! You don't have any allies!"
"Who knows? Maybe it's an early Christmas present. A miracle from a cute little fairy."
"Enough of your nonsense!"
The Devil roared in fury, gathering his magic to erase both Masaomi and Luciana. But he stopped.
"MILKY... THUNDERRRRRRRR..."
"What?" the Devil muttered, feeling a sudden, terrifying pressure behind him.
"CRUSHERRRRRRRRRRR!!"
As the Devil turned his head, a fist wreathed in heart-shaped lightning slammed into his cheek. A "Lovely Punch" powerful enough to crack the air itself sent the Bael Devil flying like a piece of scrap paper, burying him deep into the park wall with a deafening boom.
Purple sparks danced in the wake of the punch. Masaomi and the Exorcists stood in awe of the sheer, destructive power.
"Wh-What just happened?"
Everyone was speechless. It wasn't just the power that had sent a Devil flying in one hit; it was the fact that the attacker had appeared out of nowhere. Through the swirling snow and dust, they could see the silhouette of a "God of Destruction" radiating an incomprehensible aura.
"Um, let's see... If they ask, 'What's going on?' the answer is... 'The world's about to blow up!' ...Wait, was that the line?"
"La... I mean, Milky Blue. That's the wrong anime."
"Oh? My apologies. I'm still studying."
Two out-of-place voices echoed through the park. Three figures emerged from the clearing snow. Behind the towering "God of Destruction" stood two smaller shadows. Hearing their youthful voices, the Exorcists grew even more confused.
But Masaomi and the servants knew exactly who they were. Luciana's eyes overflowed with tears of relief, and Masaomi's eyes regained their fire.
In the cage of despair built by the Devils, the messengers of hope had finally arrived.
"But Milky Red! A magical girl needs her intro and her pose! The entrance scene needs as much energy as a finishing move!"
"Wait... I mean, Milky Yellow already blew the Devil away, and those guys are still standing, so we don't have time for—"
"No, Milky Red! To fire this magic at maximum speed and power, the intro and pose are mandatory requirements! Without them, the activation rate drops by 70%!"
"Why is 70% of the magic dependent on the intro!? What kind of condition makes it so we can't use magic without these costumes!?"
"Because that's what it means to be a magical girl!"
The trio began to bicker. Both friend and foe watched in total bewilderment, unable to move.
"Now, everyone! Time waits for no one!"
"Wait! My heart isn't ready, and my stomach suddenly hurts...! Hey, partner, you don't have to be so overprotective and heal my stomach right now!!"
"Minyo! It seems the problem is solved, so let's go!!"
"Aaaaaah... fine..."
The dust and snow finally cleared, revealing their forms.
"We are the messengers of love and justice! The light of hope that annihilates evil with sparkling magic! Milky Blue, at your service! ☆"
A masked girl with a snowman hair ornament and golden twin-tails spun gracefully, scattering blue heart effects as she struck a peace sign with her magical wand. She wore a sleeveless white outfit with a light blue frilled skirt and a blue cape like fairy wings. She looked like a storybook character come to life.
"To protect pure love and save those in need! If you call, we will come! The healing-type who bludgeons evil with radiant magic! Milky Yellow, at your service! ☆"
A masked giant with a headband and cat ears flexed his massive arms, making yellow heart effects dance. His biceps were as thick as tree trunks, and he swung a magical wand to crack the earth with a single shockwave. His white outfit was bursting at the seams from his muscles, and his legs—thicker than a woman's waist—created craters in the snow. He was the world's most terrifying "Magical Boy-Girl."
"To... to repaint the world of despair... and light it with hope... To those who caused this mess, you better remember this, because I'm going to erase everything with my resolve! Milky Red, at your service! ☆"
A masked boy with a small red frilled hat and short black hair struck a pose with his wand, his voice sounding like he was on the verge of tears. He wore a thin red poncho and a frilled pareo, with his trousers peeking out in a desperate show of resistance. He looked like he was about to start crying at any moment.
Everyone in the park shared a look of distant, weary confusion.
"The allies of justice, fueled by love, courage, and hope! Bringing a bright future to everyone through the power of love! Magical Girl Milky☆Catastrophe! We're here to smash your stubborn hearts and this world to pieces! ☆"
As they finished their group pose, colorful smoke bombs exploded behind them, and rainbow-colored star effects illuminated the night.
The arrival of this "hope" was so overwhelming that no one knew how to react. It was clear to everyone that the tension in the air had been thoroughly "catastrophized."
And so, the incarnations of absurdity—the Magical Girls—descended upon Kuoh Town in all their brilliant glory.
***
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