Some problems in life could not be solved with violence, but getting rid of Danzō for sure wasn't among them. As for how to go about it, I was still racking my brain, unaware of what was happening just after my outburst. For now, I felt alright, because I wasn't punished, meaning the others were at least taking me seriously, even if I became a loose cannon in their debate. I don't think they expected my outburst, but that's what you get when you let me act freely. The moment my leash comes off, I tend to chase every car that passes by.
Heh. However, forcing it wouldn't work, so I decided to throw every thought to the back of my mind and just relax. I can worry about the one-eyed freak and what recourse I would have for my wild mouth later. Let it be future-Renji's problem. Sometimes you need to take a step back and come out of a tunnel vision you never even knew you were locked into. That's why my current thoughts were centered around food.
"Four ramen coming!" Teuchi's words brought me back to the present as he was placing the Gods' favorite meal before us, even though only two of us were sitting there.
"I just have one question." Sayuri slowly turned toward me from the stool beside mine, seeing me already slurping up the noodles. "Where does it go? Do you Hiraishin it somewhere or something? I get that you need to replenish your chakra and whatever, but eating all of that? Are you sure?"
"Nah, it's no biggie! And teleporting it away? Noooo, oh no! That would rob me of the taste. It goes..." I pointed at my stomach. "Here. Straight down, no chewing, wait, no, minimal chewing."
She chuckled at that, shaking her head as she watched me eat, not even starting hers for a moment, just staring at me. Ichiraku wasn't particularly crowded today, although whether that was luck or because everyone in Konoha was busy preparing for the end of the world, I would say... Haaaah, sadly, I guess it was the latter. Nobody yelled about it, though. I hadn't even seen someone waving newspapers at the corner, yelling that a new war had just dropped, or that flak vests were coming back into fashion, but way too many people saw us teleporting back home with a pretty much dead Hiruzen. So... Yeah. It was pretty much a fact that we were at war.
"Oh? Already ordered for us? Thanks!" A yell came out of nowhere, and before I could say anything, Kushina plopped down next to me, grabbed one of my bowls, and Minato appeared last, doing the same with my last one and hogging it for himself.
"Sure..." I grunted, not even trying to argue, which made Sayuri actually laugh at me as she finally began to enjoy her portion, too. "Out of house arrest? Well, take it as my congratulatory meal, Kushina."
"Thanks!" She grinned, not revealing anything about what she'd been through, and I guess she wasn't keen on talking about it either. "It's good to be walking around freely, despite having a new seal on me."
"Oh? You did it? Congratulations!" I answered in a snap, making Sayuri choke on her food, while Minato mouthed something rude, despite me feeling he'd marked her with a seal. What perverts, misunderstanding my comment. Tsk-tsk...
"WANT TO DIE, DATTEBANE?!" Kushina snorted into her bowl before turning towards me, pointing her chopsticks at my face. "I'm talking about this!" She added, pulling up her sleeve and showing an Uzumaki spiral on her forearm. "I can't really leave the village and its perimeter without the 'Master Key' following me. Don't ask what they made into a Master Key; I wasn't told. It would activate and place me in a Kage-level barrier until recovery troops arrive if I try anything or someone decides to kidnap me."
"At least you are safe," Minato added, making her roll her eyes, but she didn't argue, probably because they'd had this conversation before, and I could tell when it first came up they had been at it for a long time.
"I just want to do the same stuff as you two. So unfair..." She muttered, stabbing a piece of meat in her bowl with her chopsticks.
"I wouldn't want to." Sayuri added suddenly, "And I wouldn't want them to do it either. This whole war... Haaah..."
"Speaking of it," Kushina continued, looking back and forth between Minato and me, "Let me understand this correctly. The Kazekage said that my clan should either go back to the island where three villages just tried to murder us... or be divided between all the Great Villages. And they had the gall to start saying all that in front of Ashina-sama?! Were they really that stupid? If so, can I become a Kage? If that's all it takes to be one, I can do a better job."
"Confident." Minato and I said at the same time, grinning, "But right you are! They thought they had the upper hand."
"I knew I should have gone with you!" Kushina added with a shrug, twirling the noodles in her bowl, "Dattebane..."
"No, that would have been bad," Minato muttered.
"Yeah..." Sayuri agreed, gazing at me as if she was about to complain. "You, I mean, you two almost died!"
"I wouldn't have been in danger!" Kushina argued at once.
"You would've been another priority target." We all said, gazing at her, "They were targeting the Uzumakis, and you are now... Well, you know."
"Exactly. I..." Kushina opened her mouth, wanting to say something, probably about being the Jinchūriki and how she needs to train it or something, but then... stopped herself, realizing we weren't really alone. And that it wasn't exactly something to be thrown out just like that. "Tsk..."
"You being there wouldn't have made things safer. It would've given Hanzo another person he absolutely couldn't allow to leave." Minato explained again, trying to placate her. "Or use you to capture Jiraiya-sensei and Us."
"But—" She stared at him, but then, seeing his honest look in those blue eyes, she very quickly deflated. "I hate when you do this, dattebane..."
"Renji?" Sayuri nudged me with her feet. "Are you training Minato on how to use genjutsu with his eyes? I never saw Kushina get placated so quickly."
"Girl!" She snapped her head at Sayuri. "Don't take your boyfriend's side just because you like him! We are friends, aren't we?!"
"What boyfriend?!" She asked, inhaling deeply, and now they were all looking at me, my mouth full of food.
"Hm?" I looked left and right, sandwiched between their gazes. "What? I don't mind. I like Sayuri; she is cute, funny, caring, smells nice, and stuff."
"And stuff?!" Sayuri yelped, going bright red in the face.
"Yeah. Stuff." I nodded. "The whole package. You know, the way you can smile, or swing your hair around when you are angry and stomping from one place to the other. Also, the way you dress, it's both cute and... well, stuff."
"Pervert!" She screamed at me, suddenly trying to cover herself as if she wasn't wearing anything, becoming very conscious about showing her tummy in her current two-piece clothing.
"I knew it!" Kushina muttered, but of course, it was loud enough, leaning towards Minato, "I told you they are going out. I was sure of it."
"I still don't think they do," Minato 'whispered' back, "Renji is too thickheaded. He is lost in his nonchalant nonsense and wouldn't realize he needs to confess first. That's one of his weaknesses."
"I can hear you, you know," I grunted, slurping up my portion, rolling my eyes. "The only reason I'm unsure what to do is because of the clan..."
"..." That made everyone fall silent for a moment.
"Mine is fine with it, so I don't get it," Kushina added first, breaking the awkward silence. "It's so stupid, dattebane."
"Ours are... against it," Sayuri whispered, barely audible, but she wasn't protesting about being named my girlfriend, which did make my heartbeat skip a beat. Damn it, Renji... you are so bad at confessing; Kushina and Minato are so right about that! Haah, be lucky she apparently knows it too. "Renji?" She asked, making me blink in a hurry. "What about yours?"
"I have no idea," I answered honestly. "My parents don't care, and I'm close to Fugaku, so I don't think there would be much of an issue with us going out by now. Before? Probably... But I have some say in what goes around... Or I hope so. What would be an issue, though, is if your clan members kept poking my sides, like your clan head did in the meeting. I think Fugaku and some other Uchiha would respond to that... Somehow."
And I would have issues with a certain idiot I'd already provoked twice, but that's my part to settle. I didn't really care about Tetsucchy. Fuck him.
"Then maybe we... shouldn't..."
"Huh?" I asked, turning towards her with raised eyebrows, silencing Kushina and Minato, who just kept looking at us, slurping their ramen, watching the show. "You don't want to?"
"I do, because I like you, too, but! I... Um..." She exclaimed in panic, then turned just as red as any Uzumaki's hair.
"Then?" I asked, tilting my head and doing my best not to freak out. "So? I don't get it. I didn't say I wouldn't be fine dealing with people from your side. I just said it would be... annoying. We are in the same camp, so I don't expect too many issues, though. At best, it would be irksome or tiring to deal with them trying to break us up. But I can live with those nonsensical attempts. I have the patience of a living saint!"
"No, he doesn't," Kushina added, while Minato nodded, so I didn't even look back at them, just waved a hand for them to shut up.
"But... You could be... Um..." Sayuri said, stuttering.
"I could be what?" I asked again, now only looking at her with a smile, not even blinking. "Girl, I was ambushed by people who tried to kill me for real. I got marked by the Kages of all the other nations. And I lived! Then, I just came here from a meeting where I yelled at our leadership, accusing two people of being corpse diddlers. One of them is a Sannin, a snake-licking, venom-sucking freak of nature. At the same time, the other is a one-eyed freak who was Hiruzen Sarutobi's best pal and studied under the Tobirama Senju, learning the art of discrimination from the grandfather of male-pattern kuudere syndrome. Do you think I would be afraid of your clan's leader?"
"I didn't understand half of that..." Sayuri said in a flat tone, before suddenly shaking herself. "Wait, you did all that?!" She asked, gawking, because the second part, me yelling at others in our leadership, wasn't something I told them yet.
"I also yelled at your leader, now that I think back soooo... Yeah." I nodded, tapping my chin. "My question is, do you think I would be bothered by others looking at us weird? Please. You know me! I'm Renjo Unchained."
"W-what? Huh? Whatever! N-no... I know you wouldn't!" She answered, looking a little blank there for a moment, barely remembering to blink, and then stuck between laughing and crying.
"See? So, from my part, we are all good. The questions we have to ask are... Are we really going out?" I asked, masking my nervousness with my usual humor. But fuck... My heart was racing like never before; this was worse than facing Yagura or Hanzo.
"Yeah..." She finally answered, looking down, fidgeting with her fingers, smiling, and looking rosier than ever. "We... could go... out... you know... If you... Um..."
"Perfect." I grinned as I leaned over and kissed her cheek, giving her back what she'd given me before I left for the meeting. "Now it's official. And thanks... It did come in handy; it made me lucky, so... Do bless me like that the next time, too. Okay?"
"And to that, we drink!" Kushina yelled suddenly, making both of us jump. "Teuchi! Bring something good and strong, dattebane!"
"Something non-alcoholic." Minato hurriedly added, making me snort, taking Kushina's side in this.
"We can kill people, but we can't drink? What a weird world we live in, eh? Let's party! We earned it!"
"Exactly!" Kushina laughed, almost standing on her stool. "Party it is, Uzumaki-style, DATTEBANE!!!"