One morning a few weeks later, a notice was suddenly posted on the bulletin board in the entrance hall.
Cho Chang and her best friend, Marietta Edgecombe, were huddled by the board, chirping away in excited discussion.
When the Four Fathers' Woes appeared in the hall, Cho excitedly beckoned Cedric over.
"Hogwarts is starting a Dueling Club! The first meeting is tonight in the Great Hall. Are you going to join?"
Cedric glanced at the notice, and his interest instantly evaporated.
Teaching students dueling techniques and then having them practice in pairs...
Did the Four Fathers' Woes really need anyone to teach them how to duel?
Furthermore, in a paired duel at Hogwarts, who among the student body could actually defeat any one of the four of them?
Of course, if Cho thought it was interesting, then he was definitely going to accompany her.
Catching the look on Cho's face, Cedric immediately feigned an expression of intense interest in the Dueling Club.
"I wonder who's teaching us," he said. "Maybe Professor Flitwick. He used to be a dueling champion."
Kyle stroked his chin. Such a high-profile way of advertising...
Why did he have a bad feeling about this?
At that moment, Harry and his best friend, Ron, also crossed the hall and approached the bulletin board.
"Why is everyone crowded around here?" Ron asked curiously.
Harry was about to say he didn't know, but his eyes caught sight of Cho Chang.
The words at the tip of his tongue instantly turned into meaningless gibberish.
At that moment, Cho was smiling like a blooming flower while chatting with Cedric.
Her translucent, snowy skin shimmered with an ivory glow, and her long, dark lashes partially veiled a pair of eyes that sparkled like clear autumn pools.
Looking at the beautiful girl before him, Harry felt like he was about to have a heart attack.
His breathing grew ragged.
Ever since the last Quidditch match between the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw teams, Cho's beautiful and confident silhouette had left an indelible mark on Harry's burgeoning heart.
But the moment his gaze shifted to Cedric standing beside her, Harry's "heart attack" was instantly cured by a pang of resentment.
Why couldn't he have met Cho sooner?
If he had, perhaps he would be the one standing in front of Cho, talking to her right now.
Harry's heart was a swirling vortex of envy, jealousy, and bitterness.
Cho and Cedric were currently deep in conversation and didn't notice Harry's gaze at all.
Kyle, however, did notice, but for a moment, he didn't even know where to begin roasting the situation.
On one side was the Savior whom Old Dumbledore held in high regard, the beloved "Miss Harri" of Snape...
Wait, something weird slipped in there. Never mind, it's not important.
On the other side was his good friend, one of the future "Three Hufflepuff Musketeers of Debauchery," Cedric.
Kyle couldn't exactly go up, grab Harry by the collar, and yell at him, "How are you any different from that rogue Cao Cao?" could he?
[Translator's Note: A reference to the historical figure Cao Cao, who was infamously known for his interest in other men's wives/partners.]
Romance was always the biggest headache. He'd just let Cedric deal with the "Wizarding World's Cao Cao" himself.
Regardless, this was Cedric's business; Kyle wasn't going to get involved.
At eight o'clock that evening, everyone gathered in the Great Hall.
The four long house tables had been removed.
A long, gilded stage had been set up in the center of the hall, illuminated by hundreds of candles hovering above.
When Kyle saw such a gaudy stage, the corner of his mouth twitched.
The instructor was definitely the equally gaudy Gilderoy Lockhart—no doubt about it.
Kyle patted the twins on their shoulders. "If it really is Lockhart later, we'll take turns going up to challenge him."
Lockhart was in trouble!
The moment Kyle finished speaking, Gilderoy Lockhart, dressed like a colorful peacock, strolled onto the stage with an air of practiced ease.
Beside him stood Snape, still wearing his eternal black cloak.
Seeing Lockhart's grand entrance, the students below let out a collective groan.
Lockhart was an absolute idiot, a fact he had already proven in his Defense Against the Dark Arts classes long before Halloween.
After having his leg broken by a certain little Demon King... no, wait, he had "fallen" and broken it himself.
Whatever, it was the same thing.
First, his leg was broken, then he was poisoned by "Severus Pan Jinlian Snape," causing him to publicly soil himself.
[Translator's Note: Pan Jinlian is a famous literary figure known for poisoning her husband.]
The previous Defense Against the Dark Arts professors at Hogwarts either died miserably or suffered major disabilities, but at the very least, they weren't haunted for life by such soul-crushing social suicide.
If Kyle had to choose, he would rather be taken out directly by an Avada Kedavra than live in the shadow of such public humiliation forever.
In short, Kyle had to admire Lockhart's sheer persistence in continuing to teach at Hogwarts.
Hearing the boos from the students below, Lockhart's expression faltered slightly, but he still waved his hand for silence.
"Now then, Professor Dumbledore has granted me permission to start this little Dueling Club to give you all a well-rounded training..."
"You lost to Kyle in a duel!" a young wizard heckled from the crowd.
Interrupted mid-sentence, Lockhart fired back irritably.
"That's because I was going easy on him! I am a recipient of the Order of Merlin, Third Class. If I hadn't gone easy on him, do you think he could have won?!"
"You also had your wand snatched away by a few Cornish Pixies!"
Lockhart choked on his words for a second.
"I am an Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League! How could I possibly be unable to handle a few pixies? I was merely providing you all with a practical opportunity!"
"You tried to heal your broken leg and ended up removing the bones instead!"
"I..." Lockhart snapped in a fit of pique, "Enough!"
"And you pooped your pants!"
Immediately, a series of stifled laughs that sounded like flatulence erupted from the crowd. Every student's face was flushed red, clearly struggling to hold it in.
However, there were a few who didn't care at all about offending Lockhart.
"Hahahahaha!"
The unrestrained laughter of Kyle and his group echoed through the Great Hall. The Four Hysterical Heroes of Hogwarts were practically rolling on the floor, pounding the ground.
Even the perennially stone-faced Snape couldn't help but let out a light cough.
Hearing the laughter ringing in his ears, Snape couldn't resist and coughed again.
Lockhart's face turned the color of raw liver.
He glared viciously in the direction of the voice that had just reopened his wounds.
But it was useless; the young wizards below were still snorting and wheezing with suppressed laughter.
Instead, it was a single look from Snape that instantly silenced them.
"Let Professor Lockhart and I give you a demonstration first."
Initially, Kyle thought Snape would flatten Lockhart in a heartbeat.
But as he watched the dueling stage where light and spells began to flash, Kyle realized Lockhart's strength seemed a bit... off.
Two months ago, he was a scrub who couldn't even cast a Healing Charm correctly. How had he suddenly become this powerful?
Given Snape's personality, he wasn't the type to pull his punches.
Kyle pushed up a pair of non-existent "Force Glasses" on his face. There was only one truth:
Tom Riddle's diary had been found by Lockhart.
————
Supporting me on Pa-treon to gain early access to advanced chapters and enjoy expedited updates. Your support is greatly appreciated.
pat-reon .c-om/Dragonhair
(Just remove the hyphen - and space, to access Pa-treon normally.)
