Love…What a useless emotion.
Humans can't control their hormones, so they call it "love."
Mating — that's simply in our nature as a species.
But not for me.
I don't feel love.
If I ever said I was in love, it would be with the universe itself.
Why?
Because the power within me makes me love the universe.
Sometimes I feel like a painter, and the universe is my canvas.
I'm just living out my own story.
I had parted ways with Fenrir.
Now I was on a mountain in the Dragnar Empire, snow swirling around the peaks as I watched the breathtaking view before me.
I took a drag from the cigarette in my hand.
No matter how wise I am…Even if I know everything, I still know nothing.
I understand the universe and the forces that shape it, yet I can't understand myself.
"BASTARD!!! You disappeared and you're not even answering my messages!"A woman's angry voice came from the phone.
I exhaled the smoke slowly."Calm down, Bella… I missed you, too."
"Really? You know how to start a livestream, but you don't have time to call me?"She was furious.
I chuckled softly."So… how have you been, Bella?"
"What's wrong with you, Raul? Are you in your philosopher mode again? Don't you—"Bella let out the longest string of curses I'd ever heard in my life.
My smile faded."I'm sorry, Bella… I hope you're doing fine."
"Hmm… something's up, Raul. Iris von Dragnar declared you a friend of the Dragnar Empire. Seraphine is losing her mind."
I just listened to Bella yell through the phone and explain the situation.
Apparently, I'd become famous across every empire.
"Say, Bella… are you coming to the Academy?"
"Yes, I'll be there with Lady Victoria. Seraphine will be there too — don't worry, I won't let that bitch lay a finger on you."
I could tell she was proud of herself.
I stood up slowly as the wind lifted my black hair into the cold air.
"Tell Victoria I said hello. And don't worry about Seraphine — she can't do anything to me. But before I go, listen carefully."
"What is it, Raul? Don't leave me hanging!"Bella's voice came through, slightly anxious.
I sighed."How do you make holy water?"
There was a pause — then a faint giggle.
"Hehehe… you boil the hell out of it."
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"Bella's laughter echoed through the line, then the call ended.
A faint, satisfied smile formed on my lips.
My jokes aren't that bad.
Bella's sense of humor is just terrible.
At least, I hope that's the case…
Iris, Victoria, Bella, Artemis, Hel, Fenrir — those are the people I care about.
More than my father ever deserved, perhaps.
After all, Viktor was a bastard.
And I was his bastard son.
They even took my family name away from me.
I don't really care, but I'm still getting used to being called Raul Cainhurst.
I looked out over the horizon.
There was still time before the Academy arc began.
Artemis was probably worried about me — I'd been with her for months.
But I hadn't visited the moon in days.
Still, I couldn't go there like this.
"YOU LITTLE BASTARD! THERE'S A CLIFF IN FRONT OF YOU — WHY DON'T YOU JUMP, COWARD?!"A hallucination.
It was my mother's voice — from my previous world.
I tried to calm myself.
"Go fuck yourself, bitch," I muttered under my breath, and the voice disappeared.
Then, beside me, I saw the hallucination of my father.
He had suffered because of her, too, though he wasn't innocent.
He sat down next to me and gestured for me to join him.
I sat.
"My son," he said softly, "life goes on. You have to leave us behind."
I sighed.
That old man — even if he was a bastard in my previous world, sometimes he knew how to comfort me.
After all, if I had killed myself, who would he have had left to scold?
"Let me guess — Mom again? Or are you just broke and out of alcohol?"
He laughed."No, Raul. You know I'm only in your mind. Forget me and your mother. Some people love you now."
"If it were that easy, I'd have done it long ago."My cigarette was still burning as I watched the ashes scatter in the wind.
He grunted."My mistake was not wearing a condom with that whore."
"Yeah, your fault… bringing a child into that miserable world so recklessly."
He tried to pat my shoulder — his hand passed right through me, of course.
"You don't always have to be philosophical, you know. Look at the view — doesn't it calm your soul? Don't you think there's still beauty left in this world?"
"No," I said flatly. "Because I've seen it all. The weight of knowledge crushes wonder."
He shook his head.
"No, son. That's a cage you built for yourself. You've tortured us in your mind a million times — isn't it enough?"
My red eyes glowed faintly as the sun set before me."Leave me alone."
And just like that, he vanished.
At least my hallucinations are just a side effect of my trauma.
I see them often — always watching me.
Sometimes, I wish it were Miss Miller instead.
Ah… to be cursed with knowledge.
Now I understand Asmodeus's melancholy…
Lucifer's despair…
and my own weakness.
I've tried dying — more than once.
But I know something about Aether
.It comes with a price.
First, I can't have children.
I'm sterile.
Second — I cannot die.
And that's no blessing… It's a curse.
Even when the universe itself ends, I will remain.
Everything else is meaningless beyond that.
I sighed again — and vanished.
Maybe if I take another soul, my mind will quiet down.
Marcus's soul should do.
I need the distraction.
(Friends, I have a feeling you're really going to enjoy this new chapter! In this part, we finally get a closer look into Raul's inner world — his thoughts, emotions, and the weight he carries. The Academy arc is just around the corner, most likely starting between chapters 36 and 40. Don't forget to share your thoughts in the comments; I truly love reading every single one of them!)