**01.30 GMT-6, 14 February 1996, Somewhere in Canada, preferably a long way from Alkali Lake, Wade didn't really pay attention*
LOGAN
They walked in silence after that. Well, as silence as Wade's gradually slowing breaths and complaints.
"Are we there yet?"
"No."
"Are we there yet?"
"No…"
"Are we there yet?"
"NO!"
Silence…
Finally…
"Are we there yet?"
FUCK!
"…"
"Why not?"
"Because we're not there yet, and the snow storm's slowing us down."
"Skill issues."
"Why you little-"
Maybe having kids is a bad idea. He can't even stand his own kid.
Or maybe Wade is just the odd one out, since the other two are pretty quiet or it could be just because they are not as old as Wade yet.
Logan not sure…
and it was giving him serious headaches.
Finally, they reached the cave Logan had told them, a dark, dry fissure in the rock. Logan carefully knelt, first depositing a sleepy Laura onto a bed of dry leaves Wade and Marie had scraped together for an emergency bed, then gently prying Ken's small, cold hand from his own.
He moved to the center and built a fire with swift, practiced motions. As the flames caught, casting flickering shadows on the walls.
"Hoooh! Fire!" Wade whispered, a spark of genuine, weary awe in his voice.
From the leaf bed, Ken, who had followed him like a tiny, silent shadow, simply stared, his dark eyes wide.
"Yep, that's fire, my guy." Wade said, a tired grin spreading across his face. "Oh! To think I got someone to follow in my footsteps to become a pyromaniac! My legacy begins!"
"Kid, go to sleep," Logan grunted, adding another branch to the flames. "I'll take the first watch. You too, Marie. I know you're not…" He trailed off, the memory of his own feral rage in that cell, the times he did her, hitting him with a fresh wave of guilt. He'd been a bastard.
"It's okay, Logan… that's all in the past." Marie's voice was soft. She placed a comforting hand on his arm, her touch a brief, grounding warmth, before she moved to curl around Laura.
"I'll accompany you," Wade announced, shuffling over to sit cross-legged near the fire. "Hey, Ken! Bedtime! Come on! Chop! Chop! Or the big hairy Sabertooth will get you!"
Ken's head snapped toward Wade. He immediately turned away from the mesmerizing flames, scurried over to the leaf bed, and curled himself into a tight ball against Marie's back, his small frame tense as he squeezed his eyes shut.
"You go too, you need rest," Logan repeated to him. "I'll handle this, you've done enough…"
"I did rest. I rested for five whole minutes on your big broad back, remember? Have you ever known what teleporting across half a frozen country felt like? I did! Well, only once, but I did it!"
"Wade."
"What?"
"Sleep."
"Can't. Brain's too busy. So, do you want piss off a moose, Pops? I feel like you'd be good at pissing off a moose. Damn, I want to eat moose…"
Logan ignored him and settled himself at the cave's entrance, his back to the warm glow, his senses cast out into the cold, dark woods.
"Ohh! Are we brooding? OH! We are! Hnnn… What are we looking at by the way?"
"Hmm…"
"Are you sure you are not constipated? Because that's the same face I make when the chimichangas stage a prison riot in my lower intestine. Just saying, a little prune juice in the coffee can work wonders."
Logan sighed through his nose. The kid couldn't be stopped. He could hear Laura's soft breathing behind him, and Rogue's slower one. He didn't want them to wake.
"Right. Not a constipation. Got it. So it's the classic 'weight of the world, adamantium skeleton is heavy, my past is a haunted forest' kind of brood. Cool, cool. I can do this. Just... stop talking and feel the angst."
"Thought I told you to sleep already," Logan muttered.
"Yeah," Wade said. "You did. And I heroically ignored you. Classic father-son tension. Makes for good storytelling."
"Keep your voice down."
"Oh, they're fine. Ken snores like a dying engine. Laura could sleep through an avalanche. Mom probably deserves five minutes of peace anyway since she had to walk miles away to get here,"
"Wade."
"Yeah?"
"Shut up."
"See, when you say it like that, I can't tell if you mean 'shut up' or 'please keep talking so I don't have to think about the screams in my head 'cause I am a lonely schmuck.' Tone's tricky like that. Especially in the text format."
"Wade–" His voice came out a warning growl.
Wade smirked, eyes still on the snow. "Don't pretend you don't like the company. You'd have gone crazy by now without someone to annoy you and distract you from your misery. I know I did once!"
Logan took a slow, deliberate breath. "Go. To. Sleep."
"I told you I can't! My ADHD won't let me!"
"Sleep, or I'll make you!"
"Oh yeah! What are you gonna do, old man!"
That's it.
Logan moved.
Wade was already across the cave in a blur, his knuckles ready to throw some punch.
He then charged at him at full force.
And his kid threw some serious punches at him.
The world outside seemed to spin away as they tumbled to the ground outside the caves. He managed to land a solid punch on Wade's face, sending him crashing against the trees. He retaliated with a perfectly aimed kick, and Logan countered by sending him flying into the stone.
SHHNIKT!
He didn't think. He just acted, a horizontal swipe aimed to backhand the smirk off the boy's face.
"NOW we're talking!"
"Lets Fucking Go."
They crashed into the trees again, crashed into each other with a sickening crunch of bone on bone, sending them both crashing to the ground. Wade got his fingers around his neck, and Logan could feel his hands sinking in like a vice.
Logan managed to break free and pin him against the stone, his claws digging into Wade's shoulders.
Spoof!!!
Logan's claws passed through a shimmering, insubstantial ghost. The sensation was nauseating, like punching thick water. Momentum carried him forward, and he stumbled, off-balance for a split second.
"Missed me!" the kid cackled, reforming directly behind him. "LFG!"
SHHNIKT! Wade's own claws sliced the air. Logan felt a searing, familiar pain as the adamantium tips shredded the tendons behind both his knees. His legs buckled underneath him with a sickening, wet snap. He roared, more in feral outrage than agony, already feeling the fiery itch of his healing factor knitting the severed cords back together.
Logan was no more than a few feet away when he landed a vicious kick to Wade's face, sending his blood flying in a crimson mist that stung his eyes.
"You're a menace!" Logan bellowed, pivoting on his ruined legs as they stabilized. He lunged, ignoring the protest of freshly-formed muscle, and caught the boy by the ankle. He yanked, putting all his weight into it, and slammed Wade face-first into the rough cave wall.
"That's triple J line for Spiderman! Be original will ya!"
The crunch of cartilage was sickeningly satisfying. The kid bounced off and landed in a heap, his nose a pulpy, bloody ruin. But even as Logan watched, the bone straightened itself out with an audible pop, the flesh sealing over it.
"Ooh, a facial! Kinky!" Wade grinned, a red smear stretching across his face.
They became a whirlwind of mutual destruction. Logan saw an opening and took it, driving his claws upward in a brutal gut-shot. He felt the resistance of muscle and organs, the hot gush of intestines spilling over his fists.
Wade just looked down. "Aw, man. My Lunch. Right, I haven't had one yet! Aw, man. My non-existence lunch." With a grunt, he started shoving his own guts back into the gaping hole with one hand, while using the other to parry Logan's next strike.
The smell of blood filled the cave, a coppery perfume of madness. Logan drove a claw deep into Wade's shoulder, pinning him to the wall. The boy gasped, and for a moment, Logan saw a flicker of real pain in his eyes before it was buried under more insanity.
"You are insane!"
"Take one to know one, Pops!" Wade choked out. Then, with a horrific, grinding twist of metal and tearing flesh, he wrenched himself free, leaving a chunk of his shoulder behind, and headbutted Logan square in the face.
Lights exploded behind Logan's eyes. He tasted blood from his own split lip.
They broke apart, chests heaving, standing in a slaughterhouse of their own making. The floor was slick with gore. Wade's body was a wriggling horror show of regeneration, skin weaving itself shut over deep gashes. Logan's own wounds steamed, the pain a constant, burning companion.
Wade launched one last, desperate charge. Logan was done with the claws. He met the charge, wrapped his arms around the boy in a crushing bear hug, and used his own momentum to slam him into the ground. The impact shook the surrounding trees. He held him there, feeling the frantic, bird-like flutter of the kid's heart against his own chest, until the struggles grew weaker and finally ceased.
Logan rolled off him, landing on his back. He stared at the midnight sky, sucking in ragged, painful gulps of air. Every muscle screamed. The fire crackled, the only sane thing left in the world.
The adrenaline faded, leaving a hollow, sick feeling in its wake. He looked at the boy lying motionless a few feet away, covered in blood and dirt.
I did this. Fuck. I did it again!
He really needs to keep his anger in check.
For a long moment, the only sound was their harsh breathing.
"Sorry." Logan whispered, his voice barely audible, rough with shame. "I- I didn't meant-"
"You're really starting to regret having me, aren't you?" Wade's voice was small, muffled by the ground.
Logan stared at the midnight sky. "No," he panted. "But you are also the most annoying kid I ever met."
"Gasp! But I am your kid!!! I'm telling mom!"
"No-"
"Pfft- you really are easy to tease pops… Nah, I know I am annoying! It's my secret charm!"
Wade pushed himself up onto his elbows, not looking at Logan. He gestured vaguely to the bloody tear in his shirt, the skin beneath already smooth and whole. "It's okay, I am not like other kids anyway. Damn I sound like a pick me. Um, see look, it already patched up itself… Don't feel bad…"
The casual dismissal of his own violent injury, the acceptance of it as normal, was like a knife in Logan's gut.
He always expected to be hurt.
Even by me.
It's not right…
"I am okay with that, I told you I am a durable kid! And it's not like you could kill me anyway."
Logan sat up, the motion stiff. "No. It's still not right. I am sorry…" The apology felt useless, a pebble thrown into a chasm of his son's pain. "I just… didn't use to have kids. Let alone one like you."
"Right." Wade smiles a little. "Don't worry about it. Seriously. You don't have to… you know. Parent me. Just… be the responsible adult for them. Laura and Ken. They're still young. They can still have a… a normal childhood. They can have that. It's already too late anyway for someone like me…"
Logan went completely still. "Why wouldn't you get to have a normal childhood? Aren't you still a kid yourself?"
"You know, I haven't been one my whole life. I didn't even remember how to act like a child anyway." Wade shot back. "And I know I'm not really worthy of that. Not after everything. You know–You know what it feels like."
Logan became silent. Because he did know. The weight, the blood, the feral thing inside… he knew it intimately. And he hated that his son saw that same reflection.
"I remember it all, having to see it all from the backseat while seeing yourself doing exactly what that bastard wanted… I didn't–I didn't like that I don't have control over my own goddamn body…"
Wade looked out at the dark woods. A sudden, profound silence fell over him, more unnerving than any of his jokes.
"Nature made us a freak, man made us a weapon, and god, if there is one, he didn't really care to put our misery out…"
Logan finally looked at his son's eyes. It looked like Marie's eyes, but he sees those eyes on his reflections more often. It was like staring into a distorted, younger version of his own soul, and the sight stole the air from his lungs.
"Wade," Logan continued. "I know I ain't much of a father. Probably don't deserve the title… but, I promise I'll try my best for both you and your siblings…"
Wade let out a thin laugh that didn't sound like one. "I think it was too late for me," he said, flippant as ever, but his eyes didn't match the tone. "I already can't forgive myself for what I did… but I could promise not to show that in front of Ken and Laura. I'll still be their goofy big brother, they deserve that."
"It'll never be too late, kid…"
"Well, It's not like I could die easily no matter how hard I try. My healing factor's faster and stronger than yours. I already felt numb from some of the pain I caused myself…"
"Don't let your mother hear that…" Logan's voice dropped, becoming deadly serious. "She's been the happiest I've ever seen her since you came through that door screaming 'Mom and Dad.' If you can't do this for me… do it for her."
Wade went completely silent, his gaze dropping to the floor.
For once, Logan is terrified when his own son isn't loud as always.
Then Wade clapped his hands, loud enough to startle the silence. "Welp! I need to pee after this whole emotional father-son drama session!"
Before Logan could speak, Wade was on his feet, sprinting toward the cave mouth.
"Be back in a sec! BYEEEE!"
"Wade, wait!" Logan barked, scrambling up, but the kid was already gone, swallowed by the trees and the dark.
"Fuck."