Whizz
A young gaunt adolescent boy cast his fishing rod out into the tranquil waters of Etris. He stood on the beach, his feet embedded in the soft grains of sand. His father sat on a container near him, also holding a rod in his hand. A calm breeze blew down the craggy cliffs behind the pair, brushing the tied up hair of the father and the short cut hair of the son.
"Dad… Am I a good son?"
The son looked towards the horizon.
"Well, what do you think?"
"I don't know. I mean, I'm not even working yet, education was thrown out of the window a long time ago, and… I'm not what you want me to be."
The father stared at the horizon, watching the birds in the sky.
"Who said that? I'll support you no matter what."
The son stood for a moment longer, then slowly sat down on the sand. His father's sentiments were right. Every... most parents want to support their child in what they do.
"That's what all parents say… It's more of a duty than a privilege."
"It's true, though. Isn't it?"
"Yeah."
Small waves rolled onto the ivory shores of Etris. Blades of grass behind them swayed in the gale.
"But sometimes I feel like you lie. There's no way you haven't had a singular moment where you were disappointed in me."
The son's calm gaze stayed on the waves. Meanwhile, the father slowly tilted his head towards the son.
"Quies… is everything okay?"
The son's gaze was constant. He looked both deep in thought, yet thinking of nothing. Every now and then, he would fiddle with his grip on the rod. He stayed silent. The father decided to take a different approach.
"I'll be honest, Quies. The disappointment I carry towards you, if any… Well, I'd always be more disappointed in myself."
The father jerked his rod backwards. The son reciprocated.
It was a surprising remark from the father. For his whole life, the son had always looked towards his father as an example of what to be. His father was the backbone of the family, the rock unmoved by wind or tide.
He was his hero.
"Why? If I was in your position I would be… pretty content. I know I sound naive, but seriously!"
The father sighed.
"There's a lot about my life I haven't told you, Quies. My current, and my past. Of course, I already told you my parents weren't the best. that's why you haven't met them... However, now, I actually would like to be in your position."
"Then let's switch!"
The son and the father laughed together. Of course, they couldn't really switch bodies, but it was a fun idea to think about. The son's laugh was bright and cheerful. It was hopeful. The father's laugh was deep and raspy. It was a respite.
"Really, I do. I don't want to make you feel guilty, Quies, but when you get to my age, you'll come to have a lot of regrets."
He looked off into the distance, away from his son. His scruffy sable hair danced in the wind, along with his thick leather-like jacket. Of course, it wasn't monster leather. That was a luxury that only officials and nepo-babies had access to.
"You know, If I had the chance to work a different job, I would give up my rank in the Etrean soldiery. I mean, I barely even get to see my family. The family I love and cherish, with so little time to share that love…"
"...I wish I could've seen you grow up."
The father paused, leaving a moment for the son to interject.
"But you did."
"You don't under… You don't see it from my perspective, and I don't blame you for that. Coming home and seeing you momentarily before I have to go back to work… It was like seeing your life in a photo album."
His voice broke for a moment. He looked down at the soft sand.
"I'm just looking at pictures. Finite moments in time. The pictures can't hear me, and the pictures don't feel anything. I'm looking at my own son through a window I can't open. I feel distant."
He paused, and looked towards the horizon again. The sun shone bright above them. The father covered the back of his neck, feeling the warmth of the sun transfer from his neck to his worn palms. He knew that after this, he would have to go to work again. He would have to leave his son and his wife at home.
He loved his wife, however they often got into disagreements about their contributions to the family. She would bring up how he's never home to take care of his son. He never cooked. He never cleaned the house. He never took care of his son nowadays other than taking him out to go fishing and chatting with him before bed.
But what could he do?
If he were his own father, he would tell his wife that she was crazy. That this was always how things worked around the house. This was the system that families were supposed to function on. At least, that's what he heard when he was younger.
But he didn't want to raise a family like that.
Not like his father.
"Quies... it's hard sometimes... It's hard for me to envision myself as the father I want to be. I want to be the perfect dad for you, but I know that's just not possible."
He didn't want Quies to have to go through what he did. But sometimes, it's hard to stay calm. It's hard to stay collected and keep up his appearance. It's hard not to take after his own father's teachings and actions.
But it was an infinitely larger burden to see the tears of his wife and child run down their faces.
"You being here is enough for me, dad."
A silence lingered in the air. The wind was still. The breeze took a momentary break. The waves creeped up the shores, only to retreat back into the tranquil mass of the Etrean sea. The sand felt soft, enveloping the son's toes.
"Quies, I want you to know that, truthfully, you don't need to do anything for me. Of course, that doesn't mean that I won't support you in your endeavors. Remember, I'm your number one cheerleader."
The father playfully raised one hand and shook it, causing the son to smile.
"I'll never be disappointed in you, okay? To me… you are enough. Everything else you do in life is just a bonus."
"Actually, I lied. There is one thing I want from you."
The son had a surprised look on his face.
"What?"
"I want you to be better than me, okay? Maybe not now, but in the future, no rush. Do the things I couldn't. Be the giant on which others sit upon your shoulders. I see the hope and potential in you, brimming with potency. Whereas for me… I'm too old to even consider pursuing my dreams. They're out of reach, and I took too long to reach for them when I could. I was undecided, without conviction."
The father looked at his son, and the son looked back at his father.
"So when I say 'go do what you want', I mean it wholeheartedly. Because that's your potential. That's your passion. The thing you look forward to everyday. That's what I mean by being better than me."
"I'm proud of you, Quies. So go make that pride tangible."