I need your help with editing Chapter 16 of Cards of the Touchline. I was working through the MTL version when the term "British Championships" caused some confusion. You'll understand the issue once you see the excerpt below. At the end of the post, I'll also explain how I normally edit chapters so readers understand my process.
Gao Bo didn't know that, thousands of miles away in Shanghai, there was a young man who was about to embark on a journey to England to pursue his dream.After the tenth round of the league, midweek is an England FA Championship game. The English League Championship (FootballLeagueTrophy) is a tournament where two low-level teams compete under the English Football League. The name has been changed in response to different sponsors (see the name of the trophy below). It is now called the "Johnstone Paint Trophy" (Johnstone'sPaintTrophy), also often referred to as the "AssociateMembers'Cup", but the league is no longer divided into regular members and affiliate members.
[Editor's Note: This explanation was clear to me — it correctly refers to the Johnstone's Paint Trophy, so this part wasn't a problem.]
Gao Bo didn't pay too much attention to this game. He sent a lineup of all the youth team members. He didn't put forward any requirements for winning or losing. He was purely training young players.Luton's focus is still on the league.In the end, Luton's opponent in the away game and the English Championship was Brentford from the First Division. In the end, Luton suffered a second defeat of the season in the away game. They were defeated by Brentford two to one. The championship is out.
[Editor's Note: I assumed this was still referring to the Johnstone's Paint Trophy since it follows directly after the explanation and ends by saying they were eliminated. This becomes relevant later because it adds to the confusion.]
Gao Bo does not intend to put too much energy on the cup matches. The second division only has 46 games in the league. Luton's lineup is actually relatively thin. Although Gao Bo has brought a few players, The strength gap between Luton's main force and the bench is still huge.
Gao Bo does not expect to have any injuries in the main lineup for a season, so Gao Bo is very cautious about the use of the main players.
Injuries are a nightmare for professional players after all. On October 17th, during training, Charlie Austin sat on the ground clutching his ankle with a painful expression.
Takaha frowned, and the team doctor Haruko Sakuragi immediately entered the field to check.
After a preliminary diagnosis, the situation is not optimistic.
"Charlie has a sprained ankle. It will take at least two weeks to recover."
Gao Bo frowned. Injuries are indeed something no one wants to see, but on the football field, injuries are inevitable.
Gao Bo hugged the frustrated little Austin and comforted him.
Charlie Austin is indeed very frustrated. Charlie Austin is very excited to play in the professional league, but the injury makes Austin have to stay off the court.
Matt Schmidt's eyes flashed after seeing Charlie Austin's injury.
At first, Matt thought he could be the main force in Luton, but Vardy and Charlie Austin firmly occupied the main position. It is difficult for Matt to get a chance to start, even though he is the first on the front line. Substitutes often have opportunities to play in the league, and have now scored four league goals.
But the team won a streak all the way, so the chances of substitute players are naturally less. The winning team will not change.
Matt and Charlie Austin have no personal grievances, but objectively, after Charlie was injured, Matt Schmidt's opportunity came!
On October 18th, Luton ushered in the challenge of Accrington at home.
The most interesting thing about this game is that the combination of strikers has become the partner of high center forward Matt Smith and Vardy.
Before the start of the game, Gao Bo has to choose the combination of cards.
After ten rounds of the league, Gao Bo's current level has been smoothly upgraded to level 2, and the number of card slots has also increased from three to four.
His current state is:
Name: Gao Bo
Level: 2 (1500/10000)
Nationality: Chinese
Date of Birth: August 30, 1981
Occupation: Football coach
The number of cards owned (12)
Special Skill: Wisdom Eyes (cooling time 24 hours)
The highest-level cards Gao Bo has now are still the two blue cards drawn at the beginning. The blue game card must be equipped.
In addition, Gao Bo also chose three other cards.
After more than ten consecutive rounds of drawing cards, Gao Bo finally got a yellow card.
"[Game Card (Yellow): Header ability increased by 8%, designated by a player]"
Previously, Gao Bo had always used this card on the central defender, because before Luton did not rely on the high-altitude pass tactics, because neither Vardy nor Charlie Austin had their advantage in the air.
But now that Matt Smith is starting, he still needs to strengthen the practice of the passing routine. After all, this is a high center with a height of 198 centimeters.
In addition to this card, Gao Bo also chose two other cards.
[Game Card (Yellow): Speed increased by 7%, designated by a player. ]
This card Gao Bo was used on Vardy,
Then there was a white card that increased the passing ability by 3%, which was used on Kevin Keane.
Although there are a lot of cards in Gaobo, there are only a few that can be used.
Gao Bo is now eagerly looking forward to the rewards he can get after the season is over!
In this game, Akrington saw Charlie Austin injured. They actually wanted to score points at the Wolsie Stadium. They contracted their formation and tried not to give Vardy a chance to intervene. In the frontcourt, Ake Lington put a fast forward, and when he had a chance to counterattack, he would rely on this forward to charge, even if he had no chance. For Accrington, being able to score an away point is also considered a victory.
In fact, after Luton's winning streak has increased, the opponents of the second division will begin to pay attention to Luton, especially some mid-lower teams. They began to shrink their defense when facing Luton. Fought a defensive counterattack.
Although Luton is still at the bottom of the standings, Luton's strength is considered by all the teams to be one of the best teams in the second division. If they are not deducted, they have a chance. Competing for the second division championship.
Facing the opponent's dense formation, Luton actually has no good way. Breaking the dense defense is a world problem, and the same is true for Luton.
The first half of the game ended zero to zero, and the players of Accrington were greatly encouraged They didn't lose the ball in the first half, and Luton didn't have many good opportunities.
In the second half, Gao Bo decided to change his tactics.
Vardy's power dropped a lot when there was no room to gallop. The opponent sent someone to focus on Vardy in the first half, which is why Luton's offense was not smooth in the first half.
In the second half, Gao Bo decided to attack from the side. Soon, Accrington discovered that Luton's side crosses had increased.
Matt Schmidt of 198 centimeters put considerable pressure on Lei Akrington's penalty area. At the 68th minute of the game, Matt Schmidt finally seized a chance to cross. Squeezing the opposing defender and shook his head to attack the goal.
After the football was blocked by the goalkeeper, Vardy cleverly completed a supplementary shot to help the team score a goal.
This was also the only goal in the game.
Despite the victory in this game, Gao Bo was not happy. Because the team exposed a lot of problems in this game.
First of all, in the next league, the team will face a lot of similar dense defenses. At that time, how will the team break the dense defense?
This problem makes Gao Bo a headache.
Players won't have such troubles, anyway, for players, winning is just fine...why have to think so much.
Gao Bo announced the dissolution of the team in the locker room, and a day off the next day, immediately made the locker room boiling.
But Gao Bo did not leave immediately. The problems exposed in this game, Gao Bo needs to find a solution.
He decided to go back to the training base office first.
When he walked out of the court, Uncle Magis ran over, panting.
"Coach Gao Bo, there is a Chinese boy looking for you."
...
Gao Bo is very sure that he doesn't know this young man. In fact, if it weren't for the reason that the other person is Chinese, Gao Bo would have been impatient to stand here.
Gao Bo looked at the young Chinese man standing in front of him.
He is about 176 centimeters tall, with messy hair and haggard face. He is in his twenties. He is holding a gray trolley suitcase with some paint on his right hand, a large black backpack, and a black T-shirt on his upper body. An old brown jacket without a zipper, wearing a pair of jeans with ripped knees, was trembling with the October cold in England.
Gao Bo looked at Lin Sen dressed as a tourist, his smile stiffened. He felt that he was being tricked. He thought it was just a trick played by a Chinese tourist. After all, Gao Bo was also a celebrity in Luton. There are not many Chinese tourists traveling in London, but they are not completely absent. The other party played a trick to see yourself as a "celebrity" in Luton, take a few tourist photos, and add fuel to your blog after returning home. , Writing poems and sour articles from afar...
Gao Bo looked at his watch, this matter wasted nearly fifteen minutes of his time!
...
Lin Sen, who was carrying a backpack while pulling the trolley case, saw Gao Bo.
Compared to Gao Bo looks on TV, Gao Bo still looks energetic now. His waist is straight and his face is still smiling.
Lin Sen saw Gao Bo from a distance, and since he entered Luton, he has felt the Lutonians' friendliness to the Chinese-all this is probably brought about by this man.
Lin Sen tidyed up his collar. From Lin Sen's point of view, this was an interview. He had to show his best condition. But at this time Lin Sen, who had been so troubled and troubled, looked very Haggard.
Linsen knew that when he came to the UK, finding Gao Bo was only the first step, and it was the easiest step. The next thing was to make the other party accept himself and accept himself as a member of the coaching staff.
Before coming to the UK, Lin Sen also searched the Internet for various interview skills, and then compiled a set of speaking skills so that he could perform better.
Lin Sen, who has arranged his collar and cleared his throat, feels very good about himself. This is probably a common problem of young people who have just walked out of the university campus. He did not notice that the smile on Gao Bo's face has become impatient. .
"This is not an area where tourists can come in, young man!" Gao Bo raised his hand to check his watch, then turned and left. If it wasn't for the sake of his compatriots, Gao Bo would not just let it go.
Gao Bo glanced at himself and left, which made Lin Sen who had prepared a lot of words dumbfounded. Lin Sen only saw Gao Bo turn around and leave, after walking several meters, Lin Sen reacted.
He can't take care of the interview routine he prepared carefully before. He directly shouted at Gao Bo: "Please take me in, Coach Gao!"
Gao Bo turned around, with an expression that makes me funny...
Lao Tzu is a Chinese, not a philanthropist. How can anyone come out and shout "Please take me" and he can accept him.
Now Lin Sen's impression in Gao Bo's mind is from an unruly tourist to an ignorant boy with delusional disorder...
Lin Sen had to quickly tell his story, and then sent him his achievements over the years-which is a notebook of the player database he compiled.
Gao Bo was stunned. He really did not expect that someone watched a game and decided to travel all the way to the UK without any guarantee.
His eyes softened. He wasn't moved by Lin Sen's persistence. There was sympathy in his eyes. There can be such a Don Quixote German second fool in this world, but it is really his own misfortune, despite this incident. It can be said that it has nothing to do with him, but Gao Bo can't just leave a young man who admires him in the unfamiliar Britain. Gao Bo is not a hard-hearted person. Gao Bo had a headache when he thought that he might have to pay Lin Sen to buy a ticket to return to his country....
But Gao Bo still took the notebook that Lin Sen handed over.
Gao Bo was stunned when he saw the dense data on the notebook.
This young man used mathematical methods to count some data on most players in the English Champions League, and he could also give his own analysis based on the data.
While Gao Bo was serious about it, Lin Sen explained his understanding of football.
Gao Bo had to admit that this young man has great potential in the field of football, and his understanding of football is far from the level that ordinary fans can reach.
More importantly, this is just a young man in his early twenties.
Gao Bo got serious. Speaking of it, in Gao Bo's coaching staff, there is really no role as a data analyst.
Gao Bo put away his smile: "You come with me!"
Lin Sen breathed a sigh of relief. After Gao Bo walked past him, he stretched out his fist to celebrate in secret. UU reading www. uukanshu.com his first step was successful.
After chatting with Lin Sen in the office, Gao Bo decided to hire the young man to join his coaching staff. In Luton, besides the boss, Gao Bo has the highest authority. The club goes from the first team to the youth training. All matters of the college are under Gao Bo's jurisdiction, not to mention Gao Bo's own coaching staff.
But before hiring Lin Sen, Gao Bo still set up a probation period.
"November 5th and November 8th, we will face Walsall at home in the English Championships and Al Qingcheng at home in the FA Cup. You are responsible for collecting information about these two teams. , After finishing the analysis, make a report and give it to me. You have to give me the report against Walsall before the 15th round of the league."
After chatting with Lin Sen in the office, Gao Bo decided to hire the young man to join his coaching staff. In Luton, besides the boss, Gao Bo has the highest authority. The club goes from the first team to the youth training. All matters of the college are under Gao Bo's jurisdiction, not to mention Gao Bo's own coaching staff.But before hiring Lin Sen, Gao Bo still set up a probation period."November 5th and November 8th, we will face Walsall at home in the English Championships and Al Qingcheng at home in the FA Cup. You are responsible for collecting information about these two teams. , After finishing the analysis, make a report and give it to me. You have to give me the report against Walsall before the 15th round of the league."
[Editor's Note: This is where the confusion begins. Identifying "Al Qingcheng" as Altrincham FC was simple, but the reference to playing Walsall in the "English Championships" makes no sense. It cannot be the English Championship league, and Luton is already eliminated from the League Cup. Earlier in the chapter they were knocked out by Brentford, so it cannot be the Johnstone's Paint Trophy either. It also cannot be the FA Cup, because that match is listed separately right after. I tried checking later chapters for clarification, but the same phrase continues to appear without resolving what competition this is supposed to refer to.]
"Yes!!! Coach!!!" Lin Sen grinned. He hasn't talked with Gao Bo about the salary.
"These days I will arrange for the club staff to let you watch the games between the two teams, but if you pass the probation period, I suggest you go for an English driver's license yourself, boy, you will be busy in the future." Gao Bo patted Lin Sen on the shoulder.
The competition of the British Championships Gao Bo does not pay much attention to it. Even if it is to win the final championship, this competition is meaningless-the winning prize is only less than 100,000 pounds.
The FA Cup is very important to Gao Bo. Now that Luton is out of the League Cup, Gao Bo does not plan to give up the FA Cup. After all, if you reach the third round of the FA Cup, you still have a chance to draw those Premier League giants.
At that time, just playing a game at the home court of the Premier League giants will have at least hundreds of thousands of pounds in tickets and broadcast shares.
That's big business.
is in its place and seeks its politics. Gao Bo also had to worry about Luton's financial situation.
Patreon Note:
Can you help me with this, readers? I'm stuck on something in this chapter, and I figured that maybe someone out there will recognize what I'm missing. I'm not sure if there's a competition I've forgotten about or if it's something unusual Luton might have played in that season, but I can't make sense of the part mentioning "Walsall in the English Championships." Nothing in the real 2008–09 structure seems to match that description.
When things like this pop up, they really slow down my editing process. I always read each chapter one or two times first to catch translation errors and to clean up anything that might confuse the rewrite. Sometimes I add a small action or detail in important match scenes if the MTL is too incomplete, just to make the sequence understandable. After that, I send the chapter to ChatGPT with very strict instructions so it can rewrite the text properly.
I've never openly talked about using AI to assist with editing, mostly because I know some people don't like it, but I'm sure a few readers have already figured it out from certain patterns. Since it's relevant here, I'd rather just be upfront about the process.
Here is the instruction list I use for this chapter for example:
MASTER EDITING & WRITING INSTRUCTIONS
GENERAL WRITING & STYLE RULES
Fix all MTL errors — grammar, syntax, word choice, sentence flow.
Never remove, cut, or shorten content.
Rewrite line-by-line, keeping ALL meaning, events, order, and structure.
Never add plot, new events, new actions, new dialogue, or new info.
Every sentence must be complete — never fragmentary.
No unnecessary dramatization. Keep tone natural and realistic.
Improve prose, clarity, coherence, and immersion without altering story direction.
No replacing sentences fully unless needed to fix broken MTL.
Read carefully when the text is unclear and correct only what is needed.
Respect the user's cutoff — stop EXACTLY where the part ends.
Do not add transitions, conclusions, or "extra lines" beyond the cutoff.
Maintain a consistent, polished narrative style.
Fix gender confusion by interpreting context correctly.
Keep story pacing identical — expand only small details when necessary for realism.
Preserve the author's voice and your established editing voice.
FOOTBALL-SPECIFIC RULES
Make football scenes realistic and immersive.
Pay attention to tactical detail, player movement, spatial awareness, and match flow — but without changing meaning.
Never remove or reduce match description — only expand or refine when needed.
Avoid repetition in football action.
No overt explanations of rules — show through action.
Correct unrealistic football details while keeping the story intact.
Reflect football culture and tactics of the era (2000–2009).
Make crowd atmosphere, stadium feel, and commentary realistic.
Show reactions of multiple players when appropriate — not only the ball-carrier.
When appropriate, enhance match immersion: weather, tempo, crowd reaction.
Respect the league structures and real-world football context of 2008–09.
WORLD-BUILDING & CHARACTER RULES
Maintain realism in social, cultural, and historical context.
Correct or tone down racism, nationalism, or misogyny when exaggerated —
keep realism, but not offensiveness.
If historical narration appears, verify accuracy.
Correct historical mistakes AND enrich the historical context if needed
(e.g., Notts County founding, FA formation, league history).
Respect 2008–09 setting:
No modern smartphones
Media style of the era
Early-2000s British culture
Football systems, formats, and technology at that time
Correct player, place, team, stadium names(this l already do but sometime l miss some so l add this for that)
Respect how people spoke and behaved in that time period.
Improve environmental descriptions moderately (streets, bars, crowd energy).
Deepen immersion without altering story meaning.
SYSTEM (Football Edge System) RULES
Do NOT make the system realistic — it is fictional and must remain as-is.
Do NOT change any system mechanics.
Scouting Vision, cards, cooldowns, XP, missions must stay exactly as written.
No new abilities, no new mechanics unless the text provides them.
Never contradict or "fix" system logic — treat it as canon.
What do you think?